It was Once so Simple
by MajesticPurpleCupCake
Summary: When Syaoran and Sakura were kids, they were close friends, but after the death of Sakura's mother, they drifted their separate ways. Now, seven years later, they're practically strangers. Well, until their teacher decides that Syaoran is going to tutor Sakura before school everyday. Can these two work out their differences and go back to being friends? Rated T for mild language.
1. Tutoring

**Last Update: January 4, 2015**

**Hello, and welcome to It was Once so Simple. I'm MajesticPurpleCupCake, but you call can just call me Cupcake. For starter, I want to get the disclaimer out of the way. It applies to this and all future chapters.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura.**

**See? That wasn't so painful.**

**Alright, so here's the gist of what's going on here. Basically, this story is currently a work-in-progress. I'm still posting new chapters; however, due to grammatical errors in the first few chapters, I'm going back and editing them, so I'll be listing when the last update/edit for each chapter is. I already put this chapter's at the top for you.**

**Now, some background on the story: Syaoran and Sakura are 17 and in their Senior year of high school. Syaoran is still from Hong Kong. Sakura's mother, as you will soon find, is deceased. The two used to be friends, but aren't any more. You find out several chapters in what happened, but I hint at it several times.**

**Note: Most of the time, I don't italicize thoughts. Everything is present tense, though, so it mostly just all flows together. You'll have a better idea of what I'm talking about after reading the chapter.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

My mother died on a chilly afternoon near the end of Autumn. The doctors all told us the same thing. They told us it was _Cancer_. The winter before my tenth birthday, my mother was diagnosed with Acute Myelogenous Leukemia. At the time, and still to this day, I've never been able to wrap my head around how something so awful could happen to such a kindhearted person.

Even though it happened seven years ago, back when I was only ten, I still remember it like it was just yesterday. The pain and loss my family went through on the day of my mother's death left a gaping hole in our lives. It was like we were a house, and she was the support beams. Without her, the entire foundation collapsed in on itself.

As strange as it sounds, I've always remembered the months leading up to my mother's death as being worse than her actual death itself. All four of us had cope with the knowledge that Nadeshiko wasn't going to be with us for much longer. Her death was inevitable, and we all knew that. It was just a matter of facing the facts.

The worst part of dealing with my mother's Leukemia–besides the chemo and her death–was that she would get nosebleeds. Nosebleeds are never pleasant, but the ones that my mom got were simply on an entirely different level in terms of severity. The doctors explained to me that Leukemia is a type of blood cancer that can prevent blood clotting, so when my mom bled, she wouldn't stop bleeding without a medic.

For a ten-year-old, the events were quite traumatic, especially since there wasn't any warning about when one was going to come. One minute she would be standing there smiling brightly and the next she would be on the ground surrounded by a pool of her own blood.

All that blood. All that pain. All that suffering. And for what? She still died in the end. Seven years later, and it still haunts my nightmares.

* * *

_I'm in a kitchen, across the room from a young girl–no older than eight or nine–with auburn hair and bright, shining emerald eyes. She stands atop a stool and leans across the kitchen counter, trying to peer over the rim of a large mixing bowl. There's movement to my right, and I watch as a beautiful woman in her early thirties with tumbling blue-gray curls walks up to the girl and rests a hand on her shoulder, saying something to her. For one perfect moment I watch the two of them as they bake together like any happy mother and daughter would–_should_–do. But nothing lasts forever, and I find myself watching with dread as the scene darkens._

_The woman is measuring out flour from the bag and pouring it into the bowl when suddenly, without any warning, she stops abruptly and grabs onto the counter's edge with one hand. Her hand flies up to her face. The little girl looks over to her, surprised by the abrupt action, and sees the look of nausea on the woman's face._

_"Mommy?" Her voice alone is so innocent that it makes me want to cry. The girl watches in confusion as a single drop of red liquid falls from behind the older woman's hand. "Mommy, what's wrong?" Panic runs deep in my veins, knowing all too well what's about to happen. Time seems to slow as the woman reaches out and grabs hold of a nearby towel just as the dam breaks._

_Crimson red blood pours from the woman's nose like a faucet. She covers it with the towel, but not before the red liquid can spread out over the countertop and start to drip down the sides._

_"Mommy!" The young girl's emerald eyes are wide in a mix of confusion and panic as she leans over to the counter to her mother. When the woman's grip on the counter loosens and she falls to the floor, the little girl nearly tumbles off of the stool to get to her._

_At her mother's side, the girl franticly asks her mother what to do. When the woman speaks, her voice is nearly inaudible. "The phone, sweetie. Bring mommy the phone."_

_The panicked child stands on wobbling legs and stumbles as quickly as she can manage towards the phone. After grabbing it from the island, she half-crawls back to her mother. When she gets there, she stares down at the phone in her trembling hands and tries to remember the most simple three-digit number that she has been told since she was old enough to understand what it meant. It should have been the simplest thing to do, but in that moment, she can't move. Can't think._

_Then her mother's blood-stained hands reach out and take the phone from her daughter's trembling ones. 1-1-9. Simple as that. The woman holds the phone up to her ear, and when theres a voice on the other end, she speaks in as steady of a voice as she can manage, informing the call taker of the situation._

_Time seems to blend together after that, but I watch only half aware as after a while, the girl's head suddenly shoots up and she hesitantly leaves her mother's side to get the front door. My viewpoint shifts to follow the girl. Paramedics rush past her with a stretcher, and moments later, the girl is running after the strange people who are carrying her mother away._

_Just before they load her into the ambulance, the woman turns her head to look at her daughter. "It's going to be alright," she says. "Don't worry, Sakura. Mommy is going to be alright."_

* * *

I wake up with a gasp. My heart pounds in my chest and my body is covered in a cold sweat. Sitting up in my bed, I think back to the nightmare I just had. Only it's not just a nightmare. It's a memory. The same one that's haunted me for the past seven years.

After I catch my breath and my heart rate slows down, I lay back in bed, my eyes still open. I stare up at my ceiling for a while. Some nights I'm able to fall back asleep after the nightmare, so I simply close my eyes and hope that sleep doesn't continue to elude me.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

I wake up late Monday morning. Glancing over at the alarm clock, I see I only have about half an hour before class starts.

Well, there goes that promise to Terada. I've already been late a few times this year. What's one more tardy going to do?

It's been over five years since I left Hong Kong to return to my second home in Japan, yet I still haven't adjusted to the hours. Worst case of jet lag _ever_.

I pull myself up out of bed and do the same thing I do every morning with the exception of training, since it usually takes up a good hour. Take a quick shower, get dressed, eat breakfast, brush teeth, and head out. Always in that order. I'm a creature of habit, so days like this when I don't get my routine started on time, everything feels off.

This morning, like every other morning without exception, my legal guardian and family butler, Wei, catches me on the way out and asks, "Would you like to take the car today, Syaoran-sama?"

I don't know why he bothers, since I almost always say no. "That's alright, Wei, I think I'll walk today."

He bows. "As you wish." And just like that, he disappears down the hallway.

No more than five minutes later, I'm strolling down the sidewalk on my way to school, not even bothering to hurry. I'm going to be late either way, so there's really no point in exerting extra energy just to be slightly _less_ late.

Oddly enough, though, part of me almost _wants_ to hurry. It mystifies me, since there's nothing waiting for me at school, but I just have this feeling in the pit of my stomach that today is different. Whether it's for the good or the bad, though, I haven't the slightest clue.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

The next time that I wake up, it's to the sound of my alarm clocks going off. They blare in my ears as they do every morning with that same obnoxious, nerve-racking beeping. I get up half-heartedly and turn off the one on my headboard, before walking around the room to turn off the rest of them. As much as I hate doing it every morning, it's the only way for me to be sure that I wake up on time.

After shutting off all the clocks and briefly stretching, I head into the bathroom to take a shower. Within twenty minutes, I'm downstairs shoving scrabbled eggs into my mouth.

As soon as I finally finish eating, I grab my things, pull on my roller blades, and race out of the house. Rolling down the streets of Tomoeda on my way to school, I observe the vibrant array of colors that the autumn leaves hold. I've never liked the season very much, but the beautiful colors are what make

Upon reaching my school building, I switch into my indoor shoes and head strait to the art room. I always get to school early and go to the art room before anybody else arrives. It's basically the only part of my day when I can let all of my worries go and really express myself.

The first thing I do after entering the empty classroom is pull out my most recent work. After setting it down on the easel, I grab the painting supplies, and sit myself down in front of the painting.

For the next twenty minutes, I fill the paper with a wide variety of tints and shades of blue.

It's not until the five minute warning bell rings that I wake from my trance. My head shoots up and I look around to find the room is still empty. The sound of students rushing through the halls, trying to get to class on time, doesn't fail to make its way to my ears. On instinct, I stand up and start to put away the painting supplies, but then I turn around find my eyes glued to the painting I've spent the last two weeks pouring my heart into.

The overall image is of a young girl, no older than ten, laying underwater, her hair cast in all directions, and her two frail hands outstretched as if trying to reach through the canvas and grab onto me. Her eyes are filled with fear and her mouth is open in a silent scream. She's drowning. And no matter how much I wish I could, I know that I can't reach through to the barrier of reality to pull her up. I can't save her. Can't pull her into my arms and tell her everything will be alright. She'll die there in that dark world where no-one can hear her desperate cries for help.

I stare at it for a few minutes, not even registering it when the final bell rings and I'm still in the art room. The image is almost complete, but something is still missing.

But what?

My mind races as I try to uncover the solution. After running through a number of possible changes in my head, I finally give up. It'll come to me eventually. It always does.

* * *

As soon as I set my foot into the classroom, my teacher is on my back.

"Ms. Kinomoto!" Oh great, he sounds pissed. An angry Terada is never a good thing.

I stop in the doorway and suppress a groan. Forcing myself to look at him, I say as innocently as possible, "Yes, Terada-sensei?"

Sometimes I wonder if it's worth the lectures just to paint, but, in the end, I can never seem to help myself.

"You're late. That's the third time this month." Here we go again.

"I know. I just got a little sidetracked. It won't happen again, sensei." Well, at least I'll _try_ not to let it happen again. No guarantees.

Mr. Terada just lets out a heavy sigh and says, almost to himself, "That's what you said last time."

I stand there for a second, and right when I'm about to enter and take my seat, the sound of someone clearing their throat comes from behind me. I turn my head to the right with a frown of frustration, and my emerald eyes clash with a pair of amber.

Great, it's none other than the one and only Li Syaoran.

"What, Li?" I ask, my voice sounding more annoyed than I intend. Not that I really care.

His eyes narrow. For some reason, I've gotten the impression over the years that he doesn't like it when I address him by his last name. It's a little odd, really. I'm not about to start calling him Syaoran to his face again, though. Even if I did, I highly doubt that would make him any less irritated. If anything, he might get even _more_ annoyed.

He nods to the door. "You gonna move any time today, Kinomoto?" Glancing over, I try not to show my surprise. Right. The door.

Rolling my eyes, I step into the room to let him through. He doesn't even give me a second glance as he passes by.

"You too, Li?" Mr. Terada shakes his head. "What's _your_ excuse?" Syaoran just shrugs and sits down in his seat in the back of the classroom. The action results in Mr. Terada pinching the bridge of his nose and saying to the both of us, "Alright, the two of you stay after class. We need to talk."

With that, the subject is dropped. Mr. Terada goes back to teaching, and I sit down in my seat that just happens to be right in front of Syaoran's. The entire time, he just stares out the window like I don't exist, and I can't help the resentment that bubbles up inside me. Not to mention the fact that he's able to stir up such a response over something as idle as not paying attention to me.

Luckily for me, my thoughts are interrupted by the familiar feeling of something being tapped against my right hip.

Tomoyo.

Without turning my head, I reach out and take the note from her hand. First I make sure Mr. Terada isn't looking, and then I carefully unfold the paper on top of my math textbook.

_Is everything alright? You've been late a lot recently. Is it your dad again?_

After reading it, I carefully scribble down my response and hand it back to Tomoyo in the same manner.

_Everything is fine. No, it's not my dad this time. I'm working on this art thing. By the way, I really need to talk to you at lunch. It's about Touya. Wait for me on the roof?_

I give her a quick glance and she nods, mouthing a tiny 'okay'. Now all that's left to do is wait for lunch to start.

* * *

When the lunch bell finally rings, Tomoyo gives me an encouraging smile and leaves the classroom. I'm left in the room with Syaoran, waiting for Terada to finish up at his desk.

For crying out load, what is he doing? This is awkward as hell! Why does he have to talk to us at the same time, anyways? Can't one of us just wait in the hall? Preferably Syaoran, that way I can get out of here quicker.

After what feels like forever, Terada _finally_ looks at us and speaks. "Alright, now that I've got the two of you here, we need to talk."

_Yeah. Got that_. I have to resist the urge to roll my eyes.

"Now look, you two are the only ones who I have to repeatedly talk to, and that needs to change. Li, as we all know, you're the brightest student out of all my classes–maybe even in the entire school."

Great, go and put him on a freaking pedestal, why don't you? Oh hell no! Did he just smirk? _That little son of a_–my thoughts are interrupted when Terada continues talking.

"Whereas Kinomoto is, well, more or less the opposite." I look at him in complete and utter disbelief. Is he seriously saying these things with my mortal enemy standing _right next to me_? I would throw my head back and groan at his bluntness if not for Syaoran's presence.

"Sensei!" My eyes dart over to Syaoran to emphasize that this is _not_ something I am okay with. Don't I–or just students in general–have any right to privacy nowadays? Mr. Terada just holds up a finger to silence me. Meanwhile, Syaoran is just standing there with his head down, hand over his mouth, trying to hide his laughter.

Don't even bother; I can see your shoulders shaking, moron.

"Which is why I have decided that Li is going to tutor you." Haha, where's your stupid smirk now, smart–wait-

"What?" Syaoran and I shout at the same exact time. Wow, who knew we were capable of being so in sync. Right after thinking it, I mentally slap myself. Don't even go there, Sakura.

"Look, just because she's a total blockhead-"

"Hey!"

"-why do _I_ have to tutor her?"

"Why do I have to be tutored in the first place?"

Terada's hand goes to the bridge of his nose again. That's like his go-to whenever he's stressed. He answers me first. "Because, we both know that you aren't going to bring up your grades on your own. And as for your question, Li," he turns to look at Syaoran, "with your grades, you're the obvious candidate for the job. Not to mention I think it would do the two of you some good to spend a little time together."

"In what way?" I haven't the slightest idea what goes through this man's head. Time with Syaoran? I have to sit in front of him all day! Even though it's not like we talk or acknowledge each other in any way, shape, or form, the close proximity alone is far greater than I would like.

"Well, as I said earlier, the two of you are the only ones I have this problem with on a regular basis. Not to mention that you two clearly have some," he pauses, "_issues_ with each other."

Syaoran lets out a dry laugh. "You can say that again."

Screw you, Li. Screw you... Although it is more or less true... And by 'more or less', I mean one hundred percent correct.

Mr. Terada ignores him and continues. "So, I figure some time together might help the two of you to work them out."

"I highly doubt that," Syaoran says, looking over to me. I glare at him and cross my arms to provide my conformation. "_Very_ highly doubt that," he mumbles after glancing down at my posture.

"Either way, I've already decided. You two will start today after school."

At the mention of after school, I quickly uncross my arms and turn serious. "Wait! I can't," I tell him. "I have to go to work after school." Both of them look at me a little surprised, but Mr. Terada's shock soon fades to sadness.

"Sakura..." Now it's my turn to be surprised. Teachers scarcely call their students by their given names, because it can be interpreted the wrong way.

Terada squeezes his eyes shut and pinches the bridge of his nose–yet again–before he continues. "Look, Sakura," he looks directly into my eyes, so I follow suit, "Touya was one of my students before-" He looks over at Syaoran, and I'm thankful when he doesn't finish what he was saying. He looks back to me. "I don't want to see what happened to your brother happen to you, too."

I lean back against the desk, using it for support. Even though I'm looking at the ground, I can feel Syaoran's eyes trained on me.

When I don't speak, he continues. "You two will just have to meet before school, then."

I look up and almost say something, but Syaoran beats me to it.

"Pause. I don't see why I'm doing this. I mean, clearly _she_," he jabs his thumb in my direction, "needs help with her grades, but what incentive do I have? It's not like I need the extra credit." Oh, the things I would say to him if Terada weren't standing right in front of us. Why did he have to bring up grades to begin with?

Terada raises his eyebrows as if to challenge what Syaoran has just said. "Oh really? You wanna talk about incentive, huh? You've still been late twice this week alone."

"So?"

I almost crack up when Terada breaks out a smirk. "We wouldn't want your mother to find out about that, would we?"

As soon as I see the look on Syaoran's face, I can't stop myself. I bend over and burst out into laughter. I have to clutch my stomach, it hurts so much. When I look up, Syaoran is glaring at me and Mr. Terada is looking at him as if to say 'I told you so'.

"How's that for incentive, huh, Li?" It's official. Terada-sensei is my hero. Best. Teacher. Ever. Well, except for the whole tutoring thing. That still sucks.

"You're afraid of your mom!" I clap my hands together. "This is priceless. The almighty Li Syaoran afraid of his mother."

"Oh, shut it, Kinomoto." If only I could. My poor spleen is really getting a workout. "You don't even know her." Hearing this, I manage to subdue my laughter enough to speak.

"In case you forgot, I've met your mother before," I remind him, standing up and looking at him. Just to see what he'll do, I raise my eyebrows and cock my head slightly to the side. "Or did you forget about that," I challenge.

Forget that we used to be close. That we used to call each other friends.

I think I see his eyes soften a little, but he goes on. "You met her _once_ when we were kids. That hardly counts. Besides, it's totally different having her as a mother."

He realizes his words too late. I'm honestly not sure if he would take them back anyway, but he stops talking after that. It's not like he meant it to sound cruel, but none the less, any topic even remotely related to mothers is a touchy subject, and regardless of how much we may dislike each other, Syaoran still knows better than to cross that line.

I turn back to Mr. Terada. "So, when do you want us to get here," I ask, too tired to argue.

Even Mr. Terada is surprised, but says, "You two can meet in the front of the school an hour before classes start. But don't go thinking that just because you two are studying, that gives you an excuse to be late for class. I want both of you in this room and ready to learn when the bell rings. Have I made myself clear?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good. You two may leave now." With that, we hurry from the classroom in silence.

* * *

**Alright, so that's the new-and-improved first chapter. Even if you're just starting this story, I welcome any feedback you may have. If you're rereading the chapter, tell me what you think? Did you notice any differences? Besides Syaoran's POV, of course.**

**There's still 27 more chapter, so I hope to see you again!**


	2. The Run-In

**Last Update: January 4, 2015**

**Alright, I don't know who all really reads the authors notes, but you should know that unless they're the first or most recently posted chapter, they aren't particularly important. Most don't still apply, and will be taken out when I go back and edit them. They can be important, though, so I encourage you guys to read them if you have time and you remember. If not, it's not the end of the world.**

**I will be putting important info about the chapters in my profile from now on, most likely.**

**Also, I don't know if I've already said this, but in the original, I didn't start using Syaoran's POV until the third or fourth chapter, so that's why there's not much from his POV in these first few chapters. I always favor Sakura, simply because I'm a girl, but you will hear a lot more from him in later chapters.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Since the talk with Mr. Terada took longer than I expected, I don't have much time to eat lunch and talk to Tomoyo. When I arrive at our usual meeting location on the roof, I find her already packing up her things. She looks up when I walk over.

"That took longer than expected. Did everything turn out okay?"

She grabs the end of her long, curly raven hair. Like Mr. Terada's habit of pinching the bridge of his nose, Tomoyo grabs the ends of her hair and twists them until they catch and she can't twist anymore.

I groan just remembering it. "Ugh. You won't even believe it, Tomoyo!" I allow myself to fall onto my knees next to her. "Mr. Terada wants Syaoran to tutor me," I tell her. She looks about as shocked as I was.

"He wants Syaoran to tutor you?" I nod. "As in Li Syaoran?" I nod again. "But you hate Li-kun!"

I think back to what he said in the classroom. Contrary to how I may make it seem, he never tries to hurt me by bringing up my mother. For that, even I can't bring myself to hate him.

"I don't hate him, Tomoyo; I just have a very strong dislike of him." I can't help adding, "And I want to slap him across his smug-ass face every time I see him." I drill my fist into my hand in front of me just thinking about it.

"Right," Tomoyo drags out the 'i' with a nervous look on her face. Then her face turns confused. "Hold on–I thought that you were staying after because Terada-sensei was mad at you for being late again. How'd you end up getting tutored by Li?"

I sigh and begrudgingly explain. "Mr. Terada seems to think that if the two of us spend more time together, we'll both get along better and become overall better people. Or something like that."

Of course, Tomoyo, being as perceptive as she is, has to go and ask, "So it doesn't have anything to do with the fact that you're failing almost all of your classes?"

Darn it, Tomoyo, why do you have to know me so well? I roll my eyes. "Well, maybe just a little. Anyways, let's talk about something else!" I try to get her to focus on something else. In attempt to distract myself, I pull out my bento and start eating.

"Alright–but wait–what about your job at the cafe?"

The job that Tomoyo is referring to is a waitressing gig I have everyday after school, in a little café at the edge of Tomoeda. I also perform there every so often, providing music and bringing in more customers. It's not exactly the ideal job for your everyday seventeen-year-old, but it pays well, which, with my family, is something that I need from a job.

"I thought the same thing, but apparently it's not a problem, because from now on I'll be meeting Syaoran out front every morning an hour before school starts. It's so unfair! An entire hour with him. Alone. As in just the two of us. It's inhumane!"

Tomoyo just rolls her eyes at my drama like I'm always this way, and, for the most part, I am. Still, there are some days that are harder to get through than most. With all that goes on in my life it's kind of hard not to have those kinds of days. Sometimes with everything that goes on I feel suffocated. Contrary to my demeanor, I'm not always energetic and feisty. Tomoyo know's that better than anyone.

"So what was it that you wanted to talk to me about? You mentioned Touya in the note."

Instantly, I feel tired. My shoulders slump froward, and I look down at my food with a sigh. With everything going on, I almost forgot. Unfortunately, I can only forget for so long before I get pulled back to reality.

"Right," I mumble, looking up at her again. "Do you remember how Touya works at that pizza place downtown?" Tomoyo simply nods. "Well, it's closing down apparently."

Tomoyo's mouth drops open, and she makes a small gasping sound. "What? But, why? What happened?"

"I don't know. Bankruptcy, maybe. What difference does it make? He's still going to lose his job. We're already cutting it way too close paying the bills as it is, but now-" I have to talk a deep breath. "I don't know how we're going to pull this off. I'm going to talk to the cafe's manager today, but I just don't-" my voice cracks, and my words are rushed, just like my breathing. "I don't think I can take much more of this."

I reach out and grab onto the one and only person in this world who I still call my friend. Tomoyo takes my food and sets it down next to us before returning the gesture. She rubs slow circles on my back and strokes my hair. For a brief moment, I wonder what I would ever do without Tomoyo by my side.

* * *

The bell rings a few minutes later, and Tomoyo helps me pack my things up. We walk back to class in silence. I'm too worn out to talk, and she knows this. When we get to class we sit down across from each other almost simultaneously. A steady flow of students make their way into the classroom. It's about a minute before class starts when Syaoran walks in. His eyes lock on mine for a moment, but he looks away without revealing any sort of emotion.

I can feel Tomoyo watching me as the bell rings, no doubt wondering about the brief eye contact between Syaoran and I. I make a silent prayer that the class will end soon.

* * *

When the bell finally rings, students bolt from the classroom like bats out of hell. If I weren't in such a hurry myself, I might find it rather amusing. As soon as I reach my shoe locker, I rapidly shove my rollerblades onto my feet and skate out of the building.

As luck would have it, just as I'm rounding the corner of the school gate, I nearly run right into someone. Alarmed, I manage a high-pitched squeak.

Fortunately, I have very fast reflexes. _Un_fortunately, even though I manage to narrowly avoid the person, I wind up basically throwing myself against the brick wall that surrounds the school.

I try to throw my weight onto the blade's brake, but my collision with the wall is inevitable. My right shoulder slams into it just before I go tumbling forward onto my forearms. When I hit the ground, the impact sends a jolt through my whole entire body. I hold my arms up to cover my face, and when I land, I can feel the concrete digging into my skin.

Thank you, Touya, for forcing me to wear padding, because had I not been wearing any, I probably would've broken something–or some_things_.

"Whoa, hey, are you alright?" the person I almost ran into exclaims.

That voice–oh, please no.

There were running footsteps, and from next to me, the voice spoke again. "Are you okay?"

You've gotta be kidding me! Of all the people I could've almost run into, what are the odds? This must be some kind of cruel joke.

I set my palms on the ground and start to push myself up. "Wait–Kinomoto?"

I finish sitting up and lean against the wall, my legs being weighed down by the rollerblades. "The one and only," I say sarcastically.

For a moment, Syaoran doesn't move, but then he seems to snap out of it and kneels down in front of me. "What the hell just happened?" He looks away from me to examine where I'm hurt.

"I turned the corner too fast and didn't see you." I say, trying to sound nonchalant. Ridiculous, I know. There's absolutely nothing in this situation that isn't totally freaking me out.

"Right," Syaoran says, only half listening. He moves, and before I realize what he's doing, I find my right arm in his hands. With one hand on my elbow and the other wrapped gently around my wrist, I feel my entire body stiffen.

What the hell does he think he's doing? My mind screams at the physical contact. Every instinct tells me to push him away.

I involuntarily flinch, and he immediately lets go and meets my gaze. "Sorry, does it hurt?"

Whats with the sudden chivalry?

"N-no," I lie. _Damn it, don't stutter!_ Great, now he's back to that annoying smirk. This guy has weird mood swings.

"Sure," he says, dragging out the 'u'. He leans away and comments, "You should probably go get that checked out."

I know that I neither have the time or insurance to go to the doctor and get it checked out, so I figure if it's really that bad, then I can stop by the school nurse's office when I have the time.

Still, to humor him, I lie and say, "Yeah, I'll get right to that."

Syaoran stands and offers me his hand. I stare at it. The gesture seems foreign to me. After a moment, I simply turn away and push myself up off the ground and onto my own two feet without help. I see him frown a little, but he just drops his hand to his side once more, ignoring my rudeness.

At that moment, I decide to throw a quick glance at my watch, only to see that I'm running late.

"Well, this was..." I trail off. Was what? A pain–literally? I decide not to finish the thought and switch to saying, "So, I'll meet you here tomorrow, then?"

I don't wait for a response.

"Great! Until then." I give him a single wave of my hand and skate off down the street at top speed.

* * *

By the time I reach the café, I'm already ten minutes late. When I open the back door leading to the employees lounge, I can hear voices from down the hall.

"Where the hell is she? We can't keep doing this with just the two of us."

"Calm down, Chiharu. I'm sure she'll be here any second now."

I pull off my skates and run into the room. Inside, I find two figures. The first is a girl my age with dark brown hair braided in low pigtails, and the second is a tall woman in her mid-thirties with long ash-brown hair.

"I'm so sorry that I'm late." I bow to the older woman who is my manager, Mrs. Matsumoto, and try to catch my breath at the same time.

"Well, you should be," an annoyed voice bellows. I straighten and glance at my coworker, Mihara Chiharu, who just spoke.

Contrary to her attitude towards me, much like Syaoran, Chiharu and I were once friends. However, unlike my falling out with Syaoran, the two of us didn't stop being friends until about two years after my mother's death.

The worst part is that I never even learned why she decided to stop being my friend. One day I had been venting to her about my father, and the next think I know, she turns to me, says she's had enough and walks away. She started avoiding me after that. At first, I thought that it was just a phase and that she would get over it, but as days dragged into weeks and weeks dragged into months, I slowly realized that she wasn't coming back.

It's kinda funny, though. I still remember the day she walked into the café trying to find a part time job, and the look of awe when she spotted me across the room in the cafe's standard maid outfit. She almost walked out right then and there, but claimed that she wasn't going to let her past relationship with me effect her ability to work at the café. I think that it was her determined attitude that swayed Mrs. Matsumoto to hire her. We were sixteen when that happened. Looking back on it now, I find it hard to believe it's been an entire year.

My thoughts are interrupted when Mrs. Matsumoto speaks. "That's enough, Chiharu. Get back to work." Chiharu huffs, but follows the manager's orders. When she's gone, Mrs. Matsumoto turns to me. "What happened, Sakura? You're almost never late."

I sigh. "I know; I'm really sorry. I was in a bit of an accident on my way out of school."

Her eyes widen. "What?" She crosses the room to me, takes my shoulders, and examines me. "Are you okay? Did you get hurt?" I wince as she applies pressure to my right shoulder.

"I'm fine," I choke out, removing her hands. "But I actually need to talk to you about something."

"Of course, Sakura, but once your shift is over. Chiharu is going to lose her head if you don't get out there soon."

I give her a half smile, nod reluctantly, and leave to change.

* * *

After four long hours of waiting on tables, my shift is finally over. Today is my turn to close up, so while everybody else leaves, Mrs. Matsumoto stays behind with me.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about, Sakura?"

I sit down across from her in the employees lounge.

The question stumps me a bit. I know that I need to talk to her about my job, but where do I even start? This played out a lot smoother in my head. I decide to begin by telling her about my brother's job. She sympathizes with me saying, "I'm so sorry, Sakura, but I'm sure everything will work out."

I give her the best smile I can manage, which I can feel isn't much. "Thank you. I actually wanted to talk to you about my work hours, though," I confess.

Mrs. Matsumoto just sighs. "I figured. Sakura, you already work too many hours as it is. I'm not sure I'm comfortable giving you even more. I know that you're in a difficult situation with your father, but if you keep overworking yourself..." She doesn't finish what she was saying.

Mrs. Matsumoto is one of the few people who knows about the situation with my family. She doesn't know everything, but she's aware of my father's unemployment, and that Touya and I have to work in order to pay the bills on our own.

I take her silence as a chance to intercept. "I know you're worried about me, Mrs. Matsumoto, and I really appreciate that, but I also really need you to understand how much I need this." I'm basically pleading now.

Her face is torn, and I can see she's deep in thought, staring down at the table. Finally, she sighs and looks back up to me. "First tell me what you have in mind."

I instantly relax.

"Well, for starters, I was thinking that since my live music shows bring in a lot of customers, we could start doing them regularly. Like maybe every Friday and Saturday night."

Mrs. Matsumoto thinks for a moment. "That sounds reasonable. It certainly would bring in a lot more customers. I'll have to work out the details, but I think that could work." I can't help but smile.

"Thank you," I say, sincerely. She nods.

"Is that all?" Now I frown.

"No. See, on the weekends when I usually work from noon to closing, I was hoping you would agree to let me come in when we open and work the full day." She frowns.

"Sakura, thats-" I cut her off.

"I know it's a lot, but I can handle it." I'm leaning into the table now.

Her voice is soft and controlled as she says, "Sakura, that's twelve hours. Only my full time employees work that long, and you're a part timer. It's a lot of hours for a high schooler to take on."

Gauging the look in her eyes, I can tell that its a long shot, but I stand up and step in front of her. Giving her a low bow, I plead in a desperate voice, "Please, Mrs. Matsumoto. I know I'm asking a lot, but please."

Silence follows.

After a minute, Mrs. Matsumoto finally speaks again. "Alright, Sakura. I'll allow this for now, but if I think you're pushing yourself too hard, or you give me any reason to think that you can't handle this, then it's back to your original hours. Are we clear?"

I look up at her, unable to suppress my relieved grin. "Thank you," I say, my voice hysterical. "Thank you so much! I won't let you down."


	3. A Rough Start

**Last Update: January 4, 2015**

**Today sure seems to be the day for editing, doesn't it? This is the third in one day. Talk about productiveness. Or procrastination towards chapter 29. Just depends on your point of view.**

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

I wake up Tuesday morning to the sound of my alarm clock blaring next to me. Rolling onto my side, I open a single eye and look to see what time it is. _Seven thirty_, I read. Well, that can't be right. I don't get up for another hour.

Turning the alarm off, I close my eyes again. Then, less than a minute later, it hits me. The events of yesterday flood my mind.

That's right–I have to tutor Sakura this morning. And basically every other morning until who-knows-when.

As I push myself out of bed and into the shower, I make a mental note to ask Mr. Terada how long the torture is going to last.

Twenty minutes later, I'm putting on my shoes, about to walk out the door, when a voice calls from behind me, "Would you like to take the car today, Young Master?" I look over at Wei, shaking my head.

"No, not today," I tell him. He bows and sees me out.

I don't rush making my way to school; instead, I make an effort of walking slowly. I'm really not looking forward to spending an hour trying to talk to a girl who never wants to listen to me.

When I arrive, I find Sakura leaning against the front gate with her arms crossed and a scowl on her face. As I head towards her, she looks up from her watch, fixes me with a glare and hisses, "You're late." She then proceeds to push herself off the wall and skate into the building.

Great. This is going to be _so _much fun. At least she's talking to me, though. That's a good place to start.

Inside, I switch out my shoes and head over Sakura's row. I find her still unstrapping her protective gear, so I lean against the lockers while waiting for her.

"So, where do you wanna do this? Library or classroom?"

Her head doesn't move as she says, "Doesn't matter to me." She shoves her things in the shoe locker and turns to me. "You're the teacher." The locker door slams shut. "You decide." With the wave of her hand she gestures for me to pass.

"Library it is."

* * *

Five minutes later, we're sitting across from each other in the library. "Got any preference as to where we get started?" She shrugs, and I nod. "No, of course you don't." To this she raises an eyebrow. Looks like I'll have to watch my tongue. "Math it is, then."

Personally, math is my favorite subject, but judging by the groan and look of disgust on Sakura's face, I can tell she doesn't share my view of it. There are just some things that never seem to change.

"Alright, for starters, I'll need to get an idea of where you stand. Do these problems."

I rest my cheek against my palm and watch her brows crease together as she stares down at the problems in complete and utter confusion. Slowly, she starts writing next to one of the problems, only to scribble it out and write something else. After jumping around from problem to problem, writing little things and scribbling them out, she finally scribbles extra hard on one and throws down the pencil.

"This is so stupid! Why do we have to do this, anyways?" She crosses her arms, leans back in her chair, and turns her attention out the window.

I mimic her actions, but instead of looking outside, I look directly at her. "Look, I don't wanna be here any more than you do, Kinomoto." She turns to look at me again. Good, that means she's listening. "But we're here now, so we may as well just get this over with."

I can see her trying to read me. A minute later, she finally uncrosses her arms with a sigh. "Alright, fine. I suppose you have a point. So, what's next?"

Wow. That was a lot easier that I thought it would be. I, too, unfold my arms and lean forward. Picking up the paper, I carefully examine her work. As I read over it, I have to run a hand through my hair. "This is going to be a lot harder than I thought," I mumble without realizing it. _Crap_! Definitely should _not_ have said that.

"Excuse me?"

Oh, for crying out loud, can't we go more than thirty seconds without her getting mad at me for one reason or another?

Trying to distract her, I quickly say, "So, how's your arm?"

She blinks, clearly not expecting the question. I watch the anger in her eyes give way to confusion. "Huh? Oh, right." She glances at her arm. "It's fine. See?" Putting on a fake smile, she rolls her shoulder. "All better," she proclaims, her voice just a bit too high.

"Uh-huh. So, you went to the doctor then?" I already know the answer, but decide to ask anyways.

"No need. It's fine," she replies, only partly lying. It's true that she didn't go to the doctor, but by no means is it 'fine'.

"Right," I say, focusing back on the paper. "Well, it looks like we'll have to work on your math skills." Sakura groans and rolls her head back. "For starters, I think we should go over the basics. You need to have a strong foundation if you want to be able to do the more difficult problems."

"Right. Whatever you say, sensei." She rolls her eyes.

I look up from the paper. What did she just call me?

"What did you just call me?" I have to be sure. She looks up and meets my gaze. I can tell she's a little surprised by the look I'm giving her.

"You know, because you're telling me what to do like teachers do. I just thought-" I hold up my index finger and cut her off before she can finish.

"Don't ever call me that again."

She raises her eyebrows and looks away with a low whistle. "Well, okay then. We'll just leave it at Li."

That doesn't seem to make it much better, but I just look back down at the paper and proceed to tell her what she needs to do. The next half hour is spent with her trying to do problems and me having to explain how to do them step by step. Finally, right when I'm about to throw in the towel, I hear her call out to me.

"Hey, Li." I look up at her, eyebrows raised waiting for her to ask me something. "Can you look at this one?" She hands me her paper and points to the problem she just finished.

I really don't want to have to keep explaining this to her. Reluctant to do so, I reach out, take it from her and read over it, running a hand through my hair. When I reach the end, my hand freezes, and my eyes widen. I withdraw my hand from the unkempt locks of hair above my head and grasp the other end of the paper, rapidly rereading it. And then I read it a third time, just to make sure I'm not hallucinating.

"What? What's wrong?" Her voice is panicked, and she leans across the table to see the paper, nearly bumping foreheads with me. Instinctively, I pull back from the suddenly close proximity, staring wide-eyed up at her.

The hell-?

She looks up at me abruptly. "What did I do wrong?" I barely even hear her question. Her breath flutters against my skin, and her emerald eyes stare right back at me. Snap out of it, Syaoran!

"Nothing," I manage to choke out. Her eyes widen.

"Nothing?"

"Nothing," I repeat.

For a moment, she just stands there, staring at me as if trying to find some trace of evidence to suggest I'm lying to her–which I'm not. Finally–much to my relief–she pulls back and falls into her chair. Ever so slowly, a smile creeps onto her face, and she says, "Mr. Terada was sure right about one thing. You've got this teaching thing down to a tee."

Well that's nice to know, but that question was from the beginning of the year.

But who cares about that? This whole entire situation is giving me the chills! Why is she talking to me so casually? What–because I helped her get a single math problem right on her own, all of a sudden she doesn't hate me anymore? If I had know it was this simple, I would have given it a shot seven years ago!

Of course, seven years ago things were a lot more complicated.

The sound of the five minute warning bell wakes me from my trance. Even Sakura seems to snap out of a trance. I stand up, grab my books from the table, and shove them into my bag. "We should get to class," I tell her. She nods and grabs her things. I don't wait for her, but rather turn and walk away, slinging my bag over my shoulder in the process. I can hear Sakura following behind me, but I don't turn.

We walk in silence to the classroom, Sakura following close behind me the entire way. Even though it only makes sense, seeing how we're in the same class and all, it still feels strange.

By the time we reach the classroom, we still have a good two minutes to spare. When Mr. Terada walks in at the same time the bell rings and sees us in the back, I can see a smile creep its way onto his lips. At least he'll be in a good mood now. That's gotta count for something. Terada is never any fun when he's angry, but make him happy and the whole day starts looking a lot brighter.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Class is rather painless today, to be honest. I assume Mr. Terada must be in a good mood. Still, when the lunch bell rings, I'm relieved to say the least.

Turning to Tomoyo, I say, "Thank goodness. I didn't think I'd be able to last much longer. My stomach is trying to digest itself right now, I swear." She smiles back at me. "You got any apple slices today?"

"Of course! Do you want to eat here or the rooftop?"

I'm about to reply when Syaoran stands up behind me and speaks.

"Actually, Daidouji, if you don't mind, I need to borrow Kinomoto for a little while."

I look up at him to see he's looking down at Tomoyo, who's eyes dart from him to me in confusion. She gives me a questioning look, and I shrug to let her know I'm equally clueless. The action causes mild pain which I choose to ignore.

"What for, if you don't mind me asking?"

He gives her an understanding smile. "Not at all. I need to talk to her about tutoring stuff."

Tomoyo's eyes widen. "Oh, of course! She's all yours." Syaoran gives her an appreciative smile. _What are you saying, Tomoyo?_ She turns to me. "I'll wait for you on the roof." With that, Tomoyo stands and exits the classroom.

When she's gone, Syaoran turns to me and lets his smile fade away into a serious face. "Follow me."

"Excuse me?"

He walks to the door and turns when I don't follow. " Are you coming?"

I cross my arms and lean back. "Why should I?" I challenge. I can't believe Tomoyo would entrust me to him! She _knows_ I don't like him.

A scowl appears on his face as he walks back over to me, reaches out and grabs my upper right arm. His touch is gentle, but I still wince and bite my lip. He lets go almost immediately. "That's why. Now get up, you're coming with me."

Damn him and his stupid observation skills. "I told you it was fine."

His eyes narrow. "Yeah, and clearly that was a lie."

I glare up at him. We have a staring contest for a minute, but in the end, I forfeit and rise to my feet. He's not going to leave me alone until he I follow him, anyways. May as well get this over with. I slip past him and lead the way to the door. He goes out first, and I follow close behind.

Walking down the halls, I can't help commenting, "You sure played Tomoyo back there." He just shrugs. "Why did you lie to her?"

"Did you tell her about what happened yesterday?"

"No," I say slowly.

He nods. "Exactly. I wasn't about to be the one to tell her and have her start worrying. If you wanted her to know, she already would."

I think about it. "I suppose." After a moment, I can't help asking, "How did you know, anyways?"

He smirks. "Well, you aren't exactly the best at hiding it." He glances over his shoulder at me. "Not to mention that you've always been too stubborn for your own good."

I freeze. Sensing that I've stopped, he turns his body ninety degrees and looks back at me. "Don't talk like you know me, Li."

At this, he raises an eyebrow. "Oh, but don't I?"

I glower at him. "No. You don't."

For a moment, he doesn't say anything–simply looks me up and down before stoping to watch my face. Finally, he speaks. "No. You're right, Kinomoto; I _don't_ know you." He pauses. "Don't know why I ever thought otherwise." He turns and continues walking like nothing happened.

We walk the rest of the way to the nurse's office in silence. When we arrive, Syaoran slides the door open and gestures for me to go in first. I comply, walking through the doorway ahead of him.

Inside, I'm surprised to find two familiar faces already there. One of them is, of course, the school nurse, Ms. Mizuki. The other, however, is the face of the kind and gentle Sasaki Rika. Rika in the same class as Syaoran and I, but I don't know much about her. She moved to Tomoeda around five years ago, and transferred into Tomoeda's junior high school. We've been in the same class since she first arrived, but we've never really spoken much. Sometimes she acknowledges me in the halls or says good morning to me, but that's about it. I'm also pretty sure that she's friends with Chiharu. Even Tomoyo hangs out with her after school sometimes.

"Sakura-chan. Li-kun." Rika smiles brightly when she sees us.

When Rika and I first met, she insisted that I refer to her by her first name, so I told her she could call me Sakura if she wanted. She's called me 'Sakura-chan' ever since.

I smile back. By the looks of it, Rita and Ms. Mizuki were just in the middle of a conversation. "Sorry to interrupt. Should we wait outside?"

Rika stands up from the stool across from Ms. Mizuki. "No, I should get going anyways." She turns to Ms. Mizuki. "Thank you for listening to me, Mizuki-sensei." She moves to the door again, and Syaoran steps out of the way. "It was nice seeing you Sakura-chan; Li-kun." A moment later she's vanished from the doorway.

With Rika gone, Ms. Mizuki turns her attention to Syaoran and I. "Kinomoto. Li. What brings the two of you to see me today?" She pauses to look between the two of us. "And at the same time. I never would have expected to see the two of you walk in here together."

Ms. Mizuki used to be our long-term substitute for math back in elementary school, which is how she knows us now. I had actually gone to her a few times to talk before my mother's death, and then one last time afterwards. She's an amazing listener, so a lot of the students go to her to talk. Some even say she should become the school's guidance councilor instead, because she's so good with all the students. She also knew Syaoran and I before our friendship ended, which explains her comment.

"Yeah," I say, throwing a sideways glance at Syaoran. "That makes two of us."

Syaoran ignores me. "Kinomoto needs to have her right arm checked out." Before she can ask, he adds, "She ran into the wall outside the school yesterday while on rollerblades. Took a pretty nasty fall."

Ms. Mizuki raises her eyebrows. "Oh, I see. Well, Ms. Kinomoto, please take a seat." I follow her instructions. "Now, I'm going to need you to unbutton your blouse for me. Li, will you please wait outside for a little while?" Syaoran nods and walks out of the room, shooting me a warning look before he leaves. I don't know why, though. It's not like I'm going to try to escape now that we're already here.

When I'm one hundred percent sure that Syaoran's outside, I begin unbuttoning my shirt. When I'm finished pulling it off, I'm left with just my cami on. I suppose it could be worse. I turn so my right shoulder is facing Ms. Mizuki and wait for her to examine it.

After she looks over it, she wheels her chair back to her desk and grabs out some bandages. "Luckily for you nothing seems to be out of place, but I still want to bandage it up. The bruise, at least, is as bad as it's going to get. It could take a week or two to get better, though. Try to let your arm rest until then." She says all this while bandaging my arm. When she's done, she tells me to put my blouse back on. Once I finish buttoning and she's put away the bandages, Ms. Mizuki opens the door to let Syaoran back in.

When he walks in, he has his hands shoved in his pockets. "So, will she live?" He's got that smirk again.

Ms. Mizuki just laughs. "I think so." She glances down at me and then looks back at Syaoran. "Just do me a favor and don't let her go running into any more walls, would you?"

Syaoran chuckles. "I'll see what I can do." I look at him like he's crazy. Seriously?

Ms. Mizuki smiles and looks over to me. "You're good to go, Ms. Kinomoto. Be more careful from now on." I nod and stand up.

"I will," I say, following Syaoran to the door. "Thank you," I call out as we leave.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

We're on our way back to the classroom to pick up our lunch when Sakura suddenly speaks. "Just so we're clear, Li, I have no intention of spending any more time with you than I have to." Her tone is harsh.

"Really?" I roll my eyes. "I never would have guessed."

"I just wanted to make myself perfectly clear."

Well, you don't need to outright _say_ it to me. Your attitude alone basically screams it. "You don't need to tell me." I look down at her. "I'm perfectly aware of how much you hate me."

She frowns and looks over at me confused. "Why does everyone think that? Just because I don't like you doesn't mean I _hate_ you."

"Oh. My mistake," I say sarcastically. "You just avoid me at all costs, and when that fails, you act like I'm some jerk who's rude to you every time we talk, which is pretty much never."

"Oh, please! Don't act like you're all innocent, Li."

Alright, now she's just looking to pick a fight.

At that moment, we reach the classroom, and I turn to face her head-on. "You really wanna do this right now?" I raise both my eyebrows and give her a dead serious look. She stares at me for a while, but doesn't say anything. "I didn't think so."

I can see in her eyes that she wants to retaliate. Still, she must know somewhere deep down that if she does, it could lead to her finally acknowledge the past, so she visibly sets her jaw and stays silent. There's a moment of silence before I finally turn and enter the classroom. I don't look at her as I grab my things and exit the room.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I make sure that Syaoran is all the way down the hall before I leave to meet Tomoyo. When I open the door to the roof, I'm surprised to find that Tomoyo isn't alone. Sitting beside her is none other than Rika Sasaki, who I just saw leave the nurse's office not ten minutes ago.

"Sakura," Tomoyo calls out in an 'angry' voice. Tomoyo's 'angry' voice is really her scolding voice. If she's using it, then that means I must have done something to make her mad. "What is this I hear about you and Li-kun going to see Ms. Mizuki? What happened? Did you get hurt and not tell me about it? And how come Li-kun was there?"

I should've seen this coming.

"I'm sorry, Sakura-chan. Tomoyo mentioned that she was waiting for you, so I just figured she already knew."

I shake my head. "It's fine, Rika-chan," I tell her, smiling reassuringly. "I should have told Tomoyo, anyways."

"That's right, so explain yourself." Tomoyo crosses her arms, but I can see the worried look in her eyes. I almost feel a little bad for not telling her sooner, but, like Syaoran said, I didn't want her to worry. Looks like I only made it worse, though.

I walk over to her and sit down. "I'm sorry that I didn't tell you earlier, Tomoyo. Truth is that yesterday, on my way out of school, I kind of ran into the brick wall surrounding the school, so when Syaoran came in and said he needed to talk to me about tutoring, it was really just because he wanted to drag me off see to the nurse."

Tomoyo looks worried, and then frowns. "Okay, but how did Li-kun know about it?"

"Oh, well..." I scratch my cheek. "This is really embarrassing, but the reason I ran into the wall was because I was avoiding a full-on collision with him." Tomoyo blinks, wide eyed. "He told me to go to the doctor, but I kind of ignored him."

"Sakura!"

"I know, I know, but even Ms. Mizuki said it's not that bad," I claim, giving her a reassuring smile. Tomoyo simply sighs.

"I give up. You'll never listen to me, anyways. I'll be sure to thank Li-kun later."

My jaw drops. "What? Why?"

Tomoyo brings up her index finger. "Because as much as you hate-" She catches my glare. "Excuse me. _Dislike_ him," I nod in approval and she continues, "he still helped you, and since I'm your best friend, I would like to personally thank him for that."

"You're too nice," I tell her, rolling my eyes.

"Maybe so, but I think that's a good thing."

_Of course you do_, I want to say.

I turn to Rika. "Sorry you have to hear us bickering. We aren't always like this."

Rika shakes her head. "I think it shows how close you two are. But if you don't mind me asking, Sakura-chan, why do you refer to Li-kun by his given name here, when you call him Li to his face?"

Tomoyo giggles. "Oh, you better watch out, Rika-chan. Sakura hates talking about anything Li-related." I wave her off.

Rika looks surprised. "Oh, I'm sorry. You don't have to answer; I was just wondering."

"It's fine, Rika-chan." I smile sadly. "Syaoran and I have a complicated relationship." Tomoyo rolls her eyes as if saying that it's so much more than just that. "We were friends back in elementary school."

Rika's eyes widen. "Really? What happened?"

Memories dance across my mind, and I bite my bottom lip. "I don't really like to talk about it." Rika nods to show she understands. "I never really stopped thinking of him as Syaoran, but I call him Li to his face because I don't want to give him the wrong idea, I guess. I've never really thought much of it. It just seems like the right thing to do."

It's true, but there's more to it than just that. I was also afraid that if I kept calling him Syaoran, I would start to let him back in. And that was the last thing I wanted. Last thing that I _want_, even now.

"Oh. I had no idea. You and Li-kun just seem so..." She doesn't finish her sentence. "But I can see why now. It's always hard being near someone who used to be your friend."

I can't help but smile. "You've had the same problem, Rika-chan?"

She shrugs. "Hasn't everyone?"

Yeah, I guess she's right. I never would have imagined that Rika would be able to understand. She seems so kind and positive, like everything in her life is perfect. Still, in the end, everyone has at least one person who they were close to at one point, then something happens to separate them. Those select few who haven't don't understand the pain of losing a friend, and looking into Rika's eyes now, I can see that she understands. She has that sad look of nostalgia in her eyes that I know all too well.

I decide not to press her for details, especially when she was so considerate towards my feelings. I simply say, "Yes. I never thought of it that way, but you have a point."

The rest of lunch is spent with us talking about classes and the cold weather that has started to blow in with the Autumn breeze. Even though I engage in the conversation, my mind is elsewhere. It explores a possibility that I never thought about until now. The possibility that I could allow someone else besides just Tomoyo into my heart. I begin to wonder what it would be like to call Rika my friend. At one point or another, a completely different thought altogether crosses my mind. I have to stop and ask myself: Do I _want_ to call Rika my friend?

The question haunts me the entire day. Even at work, my mind is somewhere else. The realization happens on my way home from work that night. I'm just walking down the street when I happen to look into an ice cream parlor across the street from me, and what I see makes me pause mid-stride. It's a group of girls, not much younger than myself, all sitting around a circular table, eating ice cream and laughing together. It's as I watch them that I realize the answer.

Yes. I want to be able to call Rika my friend. I want that life. I want to be able to go out with friends and talk and laugh and have a good time.

So what's stoping me?

Nothing, I realize. Nothing but myself and my own fear. So I make a promise to myself. I will make Rika Sasaki my friend, even if it takes me the rest of my senior year.


	4. Sakura's Family

**Disclaimer: I don't own Cardcaptor Sakura**

**I'm back! Here's chapter 4. Not as much SyaoranxSakura in this chapter, but it's got more info on Sakura's father, which I think is important.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

When I arrive home I'm surprised to find my brother waiting for me on the other side of the door.

"Touya!" I run over to him and throw my arms around him.

"Hey, squirt." He pats me on the head.

Even though Touya and I live in the same house we rarely see each other. Our schedules don't really let us. Touya usually leaves the house long before I wake up and he doesn't get home until I've already gone to bed. I honestly don't know how he does it. He doesn't even look tired when I see him. We usually spend the weekends together, but now that I'll be working longer hours on the weekend that probably won't work.

When he lets me go of me, I ask, "so, got any news?"

Touya sights. "Right to the point, aren't you?"

"I like to get the bad news over with."

"Well then, no. Nothing yet. I asked all around town, and from the looks of it a lot of people are struggling right now. Nobody can afford to hire. I'm going to look outside of Tomoeda next."

My mind races. "What? You can't! How will you commute?"

"Calm down, Sakura. This isn't going to be a long term thing. Yuki is going to talk to some people tomorrow and see if he can find an opening here in Tomoeda." I relax a bit when I hear the news.

Yukito Tsukishiro is my brother's best friend. The two of them have know each other since they were kids. Yukito is an intern at some huge business corporation, so he has insight on available jobs in Tomoeda.

"Alright, but what if he can't find anything, Touya? We can't keep on living like this." It slips out before I can stop it. Touya's eyes soften and he pulls me into a tight embrace.

"I know it's hard, Sakura, but we can't just give up. As soon as you graduate and turn eighteen we're out of here. No looking back. You got that, kiddo?" He pulls away to look me directly in the eyes.

To be honest, I don't know if I _have_ 'got that'. Touya and I have always said that as soon as I graduate that we're going to leave our father and live on our own, but somewhere deep down I just can't fully commit myself to it. It feels so wrong. I've never told these things to Touya, or even Tomoyo. Tomoyo isn't even aware of Touya's plan to take me away from Tomoeda after graduation.

Ignoring my doubt, I nod my head in agreement. I don't dare speak. Touya lets go of me and begins to walk upstairs.

"Dinner is on the table if you want some. If not, could you toss it in the fridge?"

I inspect the curry on the table. I don't think curry is supposed to look like that. I'd never dare say it to his face, but Touya isn't exactly the best cook. "Yeah, I'll get right to that."

I decide, instead of eating the oddly colored curry, to heat up some of the spaghetti I made last night. After I put it in the microwave I head into the family room. I'm a little surprised when I find my father passed out on the couch. Not because it's unusual, but because I didn't even notice when I first passed by. It just goes to show how much I've adapted to his behavior.

I sit down quietly on the seat next to my father and lean over to look at his face. I can smell the alcohol radiating from him. It's always bothered me how much my father drinks, but I'm just thankful that he's not abusive when drunk. Touya used to be really uncomfortable about leaving me at home alone with him while he was drunk or drinking, because he didn't want anything to happen to me. After a while, though, it became clear that even when drunk, our father won't so much as hurt a fly. To this very day I've never seen my father do anything more violent than hitting a wall or shoving things from a desk, and those things were only done after hearing from my mother's doctor.

After she died he began to spiral out of control. He drank all day and night to drown out his sorrows. That's how he lost his job. He showed up to one of his lectures drunk. All he ever seemed to do- ever seems to _do _to this very day- is eat, sleep, drink, and cry. He typically sleeps during most of the day, and then some nights he'll go out to a bar and drink, or he'll lock himself in his study and just cry all night long. The later is always the hardest emotionally. I have trouble sleeping those nights because I can hear his wailing. I've never heard anything so sad and heart breaking before in my life. I assume that's why he drinks. He just wants to forget.

Even though I'm able to see _why_ he does it, I don't understand how he doesn't realize what it's doing to Touya and I. I don't even know for sure if he's aware Touya had to drop out of high school his senior year to support us.

As much as I hate to admit it, though, I can't bring myself to blame my father. It's strange, I know how easy it would be. I've always taken the easy way out, but when it comes to my father. I just can't seem to manage it. Believe me, I've tired. I've tried to blame him for everything that has happened. Sure, he should have been there for Touya and I, and should still be here for us now, but when I try to imagine myself in his position I don't know how I would cope. He lost the love of his life. How does a person get over that?

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

It's finally Friday. Damn good thing, too, because I don't know how much more of Sakura's attitude I can take. That combined with the fact that she doesn't seem to understand _anything_ we've learned this year. You'd think she wasn't even in the room when Mr. Terada was teaching these things to us, but I know for a fact that she _was_ there, so there's no excuse for her not to get at least some of it. It baffles me a little, to be completely honest.

Right now I'm sitting across from her in the library, as usual, reading a book while she does work. I can tell that she's getting antsy, which would be normal had we not just gotten started less than twenty minutes ago.

"Hey, Li?" I don't look up.

"What?"

"Do you mind if we cut this short today?"

I flip the page. "We just got here." I can see her fidget out of the corner of my eye.

"I know, but we've been at this all week."

"We started Tuesday. It's Friday."

She sighs. "Look, there's something I really need to get done."

"Then do it on your own time. You think there aren't things I'd rather be doing right now?"

I can tell she's getting annoyed. "I don't _have_ time to do it. In case you forgot I have to come here every morning, and after school I have a job to get to."

"Well that's not my problem, now is it?"

I'm about to flip the page again when her hand shoots out and slams the book onto the table. Now I'm looking at her.

"Let me rephrase that. I'm cutting today's tutoring lesson short to go take care of something." She grabs her things and stands up. When she reaches the door she pauses and says, "I'm sorry to do this. I'll make up for it Monday." Then she leaves me sitting alone in the empty library.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

To be honest, there isn't really anything that I need to do. I'm on my way to the art room, but I don't really know what to do there. I have still yet to figure out what my picture is missing, and I'm not sure if I'm ready to start working on something new. The real reason I wanted to leave is because I don't want to be around Syaoran. It's been less than a week, and I'm already having memories from the past cross my mind. Every time I look into those amber eyes my mind drifts back to when we were kids. Back to when things were simple.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

When I get to class and Sakura isn't there I start to panic a little. Not because I'm worried or anything, but because if Terada walks in and Sakura's not in the room, I'm in trouble, too. I've only got a few minutes left to find her, but I turn around anyways. Then I bump into someone. Of course, that someone just happens to be Sakura. I'm not sure if I should consider myself really lucky, or really _un_lucky. Maybe a little of both.

"Sorry, I- Oh, Li." She looks up and realizes who she's bumped into. Me. Li Syaoran. Perhaps her least favorite person. Go figure that as soon as she realizes it's me she cuts off the apology.

"Good to see you, too," I say sarcastically. "Now, if you don't mind getting inside, I'd rather Terada not know that today's tutoring was cut short because you had to take care of some unscheduled business." I usher her into the room. She clearly isn't pleased, but steps hastily inside, nonetheless.

Throughout class I stare absentmindedly at the back of Sakura's head, which isn't something I usually do, but today it's drawn my attention. I'm not sure what, but something is different. I lean back in my chair and try to locate the difference. Come on, Syaoran, you're a martial artist for crying out loud! How hard is it to spot a difference in the back of a teenage girl's head? And then I catch sight of it. There are a few strands of hair with blue on them all clumped together.

What the heck? How did she manage to get paint on the back of her head? Does Sakura even paint? I don't think so- but, then again, what would I know?

I rest my cheek against my fist and gaze out the window. Tomoeda Elementary School is just next to the high school, so there's a good view of the side of the building. Just looking at it brings back memories. Both good and bad. All of Sakura. I hate that all my thoughts are filled with memories of her. There's not much I can do about it, though. It's been seven years, and even so, I still can't extinguish the memories of the past.

As I think of all the times we laughed and played and ate lunch together in that front courtyard I feel my eyes drift back to the girl in front of me.

What happened to us, Sakura?

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

When lunch finally rolls around I stand up and walk over to Rika.

"Rika-chan," I call out. She looks up.

"What is it, Sakura-chan?"

I hesitate, feeling nervous. I've spent the past two days trying to muster up enough courage to invite her to lunch myself. Tomoyo had asked her Tuesday, but that was it. I've been to chicken to ask her since.

"I was wondering if you would like to join Tomoyo and I for lunch." I watch anxiously as Rika's face lights up.

"I'd love to!" She thinks for a moment. "Although, I should probably tell Chiharu-chan that I won't be at lunch. Can I meet you two up on the roof?"

I feel a little bad about taking her away from Chiharu- especially knowing Chiharu doesn't approve of me- but I promised myself I'd make Rika my friend, and this is the best place to start.

"Of course! We'll see you there." I walk back to Tomoyo who's watching me amused.

She waits until Rika is out of the room to say, "I'm proud of you, Sakura."

"Psh." I let out a fake laugh. "That was nothing."

Tomoyo simply giggles. "You're totally transparent."

"What? Am not!"

She continues to giggle. "We should head out. Don't want our guest arriving before her hostess, do we?"

I nod and together the two of us head out of the classroom and up to the building's roof.

* * *

Today is my first official concert at work. Well, at least it's the first that's going to continue on a regular basis. Mrs. Matsumoto is letting me perform every Friday and Saturday night. Honestly, I'm a little nervous. It's not like I haven't performed before, but this time we actually have a poster in the window advertising live music. To be more precise, I'll be mainly playing the piano to provide comforting background music to the customers, however I will also do some singing depending on the song. Most of my repertoire consists of traditional Japanese songs, but there are also a few more modern songs in the mix.

Even Tomoyo came with me today to provide moral support. She's going to help out as part of the waitressing staff while I perform. Actually, Tomoyo has done it quite a few times before. Mrs. Matsumoto pays Tomoyo whenever we're extra busy, but Tomoyo doesn't actually work here on a regular basis.

Mrs. Matsumoto asked Tomoyo if she would like to work here part time once, but Tomoyo had to turn her down because she's in the school's fashion club, and takes singing lessons after school when she doesn't have club meetings. In fact, I thought that Tomoyo should be the one to do the live singing at first, but when I asked her if she would, she hastily turned me down. Thing is, Tomoyo has a really bad case of stage fright.

"Sakura, are you ready?" Tomoyo's voice carries through the the door that leads from the lounge into the changing area, where I currently am.

"Yeah!" I open the door and step out.

Tomoyo gasps. "Oh, it's absolutely perfect on you, Sakura!"

In honor of my first official live show, Tomoyo made me a special outfit to wear. She loves to do this to me. Every time something notable comes up, Tomoyo is there with her tape measure and notebook, ready to take measurements for the outfit that she will inevitably make for the occasion. Today's outfit is a cute frilly pink dress that makes me feel like a little kid again.

"Are you sure this isn't too much," I ask, looking from the dress I'm wearing to Tomoyo.

She gasps. "No, of course not. This is a big day for you, Sakura. I can't wait to see you at the piano playing beautiful music in the new dress I made just for you."

I sigh. Tomoyo is really getting into this, isn't she?

From the corner of my eye I see someone enter the lounge and when I turn my head I see Mrs. Matsumoto.

"Is it time?"

She nods. "If you're good to go you then can start."

_Deep breaths, Sakura._ I tell myself this as I leave the lounge and pass the kitchen on my way into the main cafe area. As I enter the cafe I assess the crowd. There are more people than usual, that much is clear, but there are still some empty tables left. Stepping onto the makeshift stage that that's about a foot off the ground, I scratch my index finger against my thumb anxiously. I slide onto the bench in front of the piano with ease. Some of the customers look up from their food or conversations.

I press my foot down on the silencer as I warm up my fingers. They drift lightly over the keys without making a sound. After a moment I clear my throat and lean up to the mic.

"The live music will start now." I can't think of anything else to say.

Lifting my foot from the silencer, I begin to play. I start by playing a relatively simple tune. The word at the top of the music sheet reads: "Sakura". The piece is a Japanese folk song that I decided to start with because it's fairly well known, and it's also my name, meaning cherry blossom. It seems like a good place to start.

Even though the music sheet is sitting in front of me I don't look at it. This is one of the first pieces I ever learned to play, so it's engraved into my heart.

As I play some people stop their conversations to listen. Most of them are older couples who have come to the cafe to listen to the live music.

When the song comes to an end there's some applause from the tables closest to me. I hear a particularly loud clapping from behind me and turn around to see who's there. Of course, standing there with a huge smile on her face is Tomoyo, but next to her is one of my older coworkers, Nakuru Akizuki, or 'Ruby' as most of us call her. Ruby is a beautiful woman in her early twenties who used to go to school with Touya. The two of them even still talk sometimes, but Ruby goes to the college, so she's a fairly busy person.

She stands there clapping softly and giving me a proud smile. I can't help feel honored. I've always looked up to Ruby, so whenever she praises me it fills me with joy.

I smile back at them and return to the music. The following forty-five minutes I play a variety of tunes before taking a five minute brake and going back on until closing an hour later. At the end of it my fingers are stiff from all the playing. I don't think I could play another note if I tried. To think that I have to do this tomorrow night, too! At this rate my fingers are going to fall off.

* * *

When I arrive home after work I find Touya waiting for me again.

"Is this going to become a regular thing?"

He chuckles. "Doubtful. I heard back from Yuki today."

He's got my attention now. On Wednesday, Yukito was going to ask around for a job opening that Touya could fill. To have news so soon must be good thing.

"What did he say?"

"Apparently there's a sporting goods store opening up just downtown that's looking for employees." He must see my eyes light up, because he quickly continues. "I haven't sent in my application yet, and even if I get the job I won't start working there for another two weeks, but if I _do_ get it you should be able to cut back down on your hours at work."

I try not to think about how good that sounds.

"Well that's a relief. After you apply how long will it be before you hear back?"

"I don't know for sure, but probably within a week."

"Thats good."

We stand in silence for a moment. Finally Touya speaks. "So, how was work? Did the live music turn out well?"

"It was good. My fingers are killing me, though. Don't know how I'm going to do it again tomorrow."

"Eh." Touya just waves his hand like this is nothing. "You'll live. Didn't screw up while on stage, did you?"

That's the good old light-hearted big brother I know and love. "Of course not! Come on, mom taught me better than that."

Touya's face softens. "Yeah," he says, patting the top of my head. "She sure did, kiddo."

* * *

I have another dream about my mom that night. Unlike the last one, this one is more pleasant. It's from before my mom got sick, when I was barely five.

The dream is from when she first started teaching me how to play the piano. I decided one day that I wanted to learn how to play, so she told me that if I was willing to put the time and effort into it that she would teach me. I jumped at the opportunity. It's one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life. Even though it didn't mean much back then, now it's the most time I spent with her. They're some of the best memories I have of her, and nothing can take that away from me.

* * *

**Alright, so now that the chapter's over I wanna answer one of my comments. I was asked two important questions. 1: Why did Sakura and Syaoran have a falling out in their relationship? 2: When will Eriol show up?**

**So, for the first question I'm going to be answering that via the story hopefully within the next three chapters or so. I've already written the scene I'll be using for it, but I have a few events that I've planned to happen before I reveal it. Sorry for any confusion.**

**Now, about Eriol, I would like to clarify right now that he doesn't currently go to Tomoeda High, which is why he hasn't been mentioned yet. I'm going to have him transfer in one of the later chapters. All of you Eriol fans out there might have to wait a little while.**


	5. Chiharu's Confession

**It's been like a week, but I'm finally back! So, quick statement: from now on, I think I'll just update the story once a week, that way it's more organized, and I don't feel pressured to finish typing and editing super fast. I'll most likely post every Saturday. This way, you all don't have to keep checking during the week like I do when I'm reading a fanfic.**

**That said, here's chapter 5.**

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

When Monday rolls around, Sakura keeps her promise and shows up to tutoring on time. I find her waiting outside for me, like aways. Without even speaking to her, I can tell she's in a better mood. For one, she doesn't have her arms crossed, and then there's the calm look on her face. Well, calm and _tired_. Nonetheless, it looks like today's lesson will be relatively easy for me.

My assumption is confirmed when she turns to me and says in a polite voice, "good morning, Li."

I raise my eyebrows before returning her greeting. "Good morning, Kinomoto," I say in an equally polite voice. As we head inside, I can't help think how creepy this is. Is she planning to pull out a chainsaw, or something? Why is she so being so polite?

Approaching the door, I hold it open for her. Passing me, she glances over, and mutters, "thank you." Okay, it's official. She's plotting something.

* * *

After a shockingly painless lesson, I can't help but be on the look out. As strange as it sounds, I'm basically waiting for something to go wrong. Even throughout the lesson I was on edge. She seems way too at ease. Could it be that after less then a week she's already adapted to me? I'm trying not to get my hopes up, but if all our lessons are this relaxed I might actually be okay with them.

Speaking of which, I still have to ask Terada when this all ends. So, I wait until lunch to approach him.

"Mr. Terada," I call, walking up to his desk. He raises his head.

"Li, how may I help you?"

"I was just wondering," I begin, "about the tutoring that I'm giving Kinomoto-" He cuts me off, a stern look on his face.

"If this is an attempt to bargain your way out, then the answer is no."

Well, so much for that idea, but it's not like I had gotten my hopes up thinking I'd be able to worm my way out.

"Actually, sir, I was just wondering how long you were thinking I would be tutoring her for. Do you want me prepping her for midterms?" Midterms aren't until the end of October, meaning we've got about a month.

Mr. Terada rubs his chin. "I hadn't really thought about that," he admits. "I suppose that would be a good goal to strive for, though. How about this?" He looks at me, snapping his fingers. "If you can get Kinomoto to pass all of her midterm exams, then I'll let the two of you off the hook. Unless there are more incidents, in which case I may have to extend the time."

That won't be a problem. Well, unless Sakura screws it up, but I doubt she would do anything if it meant the possibility of spending more time with me. "Sounds good to me, sir." Then I think about it. "Although, she is kind of a tough nut to crack. Getting her to pass all of them might be a bit difficult." I'm talking mostly to myself, but Mr. Terada replies, anyways.

"If there's anyone who can do it, it's you. I'm sure Kinomoto will appreciate it, too."

_Unlikely_. I decide to keep the thought to myself. "Alright, thanks, Sensei." I turn and start to walk back to my desk. Midway, Mr. Terada calls out to me.

"Oh, and Li!" I turn around. He gives me an amused smile. "Try to get along with her."

I'm not sure I'll be able to do that, but decide to say, "I'll try," just to amuse him. He nods and I continue on my way. Picking up my things, I head out of he room to go eat lunch with Takashi.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I've decided to try, as hard as it is, to be polite towards Syaoran during our tutoring. I doubt I'll be able to keep it up forever, but it's better just to keep things calm and not to let my emotions get involved. It wasn't too hard today, though. Ever since I had that dream about my mother on Friday night, I've been feeling better.

Anyways, today during lunch I invite Rika to eat with Tomoyo and I again. Chiharu wasn't at work yesterday, so I assume she's not at school today. My theory is confirmed when Rika agrees. We decide to eat lunch in the classroom today. Rika moves to sit in the seat in front of me, and Tomoyo pulls her desk over to form a miniature circle.

I decide to strike up conversation. "So, Rika, do you know if Chiharu is sick today?" It might not be the ideal place to start, but it's all I can think of.

A worried look crosses Rika's face. "I'm not sure. That would make sense, though. I haven't really heard from her. Why do you ask?"

"She didn't show up for work yesterday, so I was just wondering if you knew anything."

Her eyes widen. "You and Chiharu work together?"

I take it Chiharu never thought to mention that we are coworkers. No surprise, though. I'm not even sure Chiharu knows that Rika and I talk to each other. We only _just_ started eating lunch together.

"Yeah. We work at the same cafe across town."

She clasps her hands together, still holding her chopsticks. "That's so cool! Which one? I'm surprised I never knew about it."

I wave it off with my hand. "It's really not that big of a deal. The cafe is called Twin Bells." Her face lights up.

"Oh, I love the name!" Then, out of nowhere, she smiles mischievously. "It has a nice _ring_ to it." We all giggle at her pun, and continue our lunch.

* * *

Upon my arrival at work, Mrs. Matsumoto rushes up to me and asks, "Sakura, do you happen to know if Chiharu was at school today?"

"She wasn't. I asked one of her close friends, but she said that she hadn't heard from Chiharu. Hasn't she called?"

Mrs. Matsumoto rapidly shakes her head. "No, I haven't heard from her since Saturday."

Now I start to think. Chiharu isn't one to just up and vanish. She hardly ever gets sick, either. "Do you think I should swing by her place after work to check up on her?" I know it's a bit much to offer, especially considering Chiharu and I aren't on the best of terms, but she's still my coworker, so I feel obligated to look out for her.

"Oh, would you, Sakura?" She looks relieved. "I can try calling her again, but the past two times that I've called no-one has picked up."

"Is something wrong, you two?" We both turn to see Ruby walk into the lounge. She studies the situation. "What's with the serious faces? Did you get news from Chiharu?"

Shaking her head, Mrs. Matsumoto responds, "no, not yet. Sakura offered to check up on her after work, though."

Ruby looks at me. "Do you want me to go with you? I wouldn't mind." Her offer warms my heart, but I have to refuse.

"That's alright. I think it might be best if I went alone." I'm not sure if I'm right about that, but Chiharu and I go to school together, so it's only natural for me to go and check up on her.

"Alright. Let me know if you change your mind." Ruby heads back into the kitchen.

I get started on my shift afterwards. I spend most of it wondering if Chiharu is just sick, or if there's something else going on. I'm probably overreacting, but Chiharu is a really strong girl; It's kind of hard to imagine her getting sick.

* * *

So, this is Chiharu's house. I've been here before, but it looks different. Maybe because it's fall, but the yard used to be a lot more lively. The way I remember it, there were flowers and well maintained shrubs out front. Now, the flowers are gone and the shrubs are growing out of control.

I approach the front door wondering if this is such a good idea. Maybe I should turn back now. I shake my head. Don't think like that, Sakura.

Suddenly, I hear loud banging from the other side of the door, followed by shouts. I stand there for a good minute, listening but unable to make out the words. It sounds like a man and woman arguing. After a few minutes, the voices finally subside and I hear a door being slammed.

For a while, I can't move. Then I reach up and ring the doorbell with a shaky hand. I hear another shout followed by footsteps. The door swings open.

Chiharu stands on the other side, wide-eyed. "Sakura? What are you doing here?"

I hesitate. "Well, when you didn't show up for work yesterday, then again today, Mrs. Matsumoto got worried. She called here twice, but nobody picked up. I offered to check up on you." I try to explain the situation in a way that makes it sound like I'm here on business. Truth be told, I was getting a little worried myself. After hearing all the shouting, I still am.

"Oh." Chiharu nods like she accepts this explanation. Out of nowhere, there's another bang from inside the house. Chiharu glances over her shoulder, and then hesitates before turning back to me. "Can we go somewhere else?"

Seeing how desperate she looks, I simply nod. "Of course."

* * *

The walk to Penguin Park is a quiet one. When we finally get there, I lean against the side of the King Penguin slide, while Chiharu sits down on one of the penguins surrounding it.

"So, I take it you aren't sick." She looks down at her hands in shame. "You should talk to Rika and Mrs. Matsumoto. They're both worried sick about you."

Chiharu lifts her head. "You talked to Rika?" It looks like Chiharu really didn't know about lunch last week.

I nod. "I talked to her at lunch today. She seemed pretty concerned."

"Wait, are you the one who she went to have lunch with on Friday," she asks, just realizing it herself.

"Yeah, I invited her to join Tomoyo and I, but that's beside the point." I take a deep breath. "I don't really know how to ask you this, but is everything okay with you?"

I watch her intently as her eyes drift back down to her lap. "You heard?"

"Kinda hard not to." She doesn't look so much nervous about talking to me about it as she does hesitant.

"Go figure that after all this time, _this_ is how you find out." She doesn't give me time to ask what she means. "They're always like that. My parents, that is. They go at it for hours on end sometimes."

"Is that why you weren't at school or work?"

Her head shoots up. "Of course not. I'm used to it by now."

What does that mean? Has this been going on for a long time? "Then why-" I don't finish. Maybe I shouldn't ask. It's really none of my business, besides our being coworkers. I doubt she wants to talk about it, anyways.

She sighs. "Look, I'm only going to tell you this because Mrs. Matsumoto sent you here, so don't go getting the impression that we're suddenly best friends again or anything." I nod.

I've always respected Chiharu, so I wouldn't cross that line without her permission. If ever Chiharu wanted to be friends again, though, I would welcome her back with open arms, regardless of the fact that I don't know why she cut ties with me in the first place.

I'm pulled from my thoughts when she speaks again.

"My parents are getting a divorce." Her voice reveals no emotion. My eyes widen, and I take a step forward to turn my body towards her.

"What?" It slips out before I can stop it. Chiharu doesn't seem to mind, though.

"Yeah, it's like a slap in the face, isn't it?" Her voice is sour now.

"Chiharu-" I don't know what to say to her. I think back to when my mom died. Back then I didn't want others trying to help me without me asking for it. I decide, in the end, to ask the one thing that I can think of. "Are you okay?"

She nods. "It's not like I didn't see it coming. I'm actually a bit surprised that they lasted as long as they did."

I can tell she's hurting beneath that sturdy exterior, so I say the one thing that I think she needs to hear. "Is there anything you need me to do?" I try to ask it in such a way that doesn't make it sound like I'm doing it out of pity. That's the last thing she needs. Even if she doesn't need anything, sometimes the offer alone can do the trick. Knowing that there's someone there for you.

So, when she shakes her head, I nod and let it be. If she doesn't want my help, I can't force it on her. That's something I know firsthand. After all, I've had someone do it to me before, and that situation didn't end too well.

* * *

When I get home, I head straight to the phone and dial Mrs. Matsumoto's cell number. She answers after just two rings.

"Moshi, Moshi! Sakura, is that you?" From her voice, I assume she must have been waiting for my call.

"Yes, this is Sakura."

There's a crinkling sound as she exhales sharply against the phone. "Thank goodness! I was getting worried. Did you see Chiharu?"

"Yeah. I stopped by her house and talked the two of us talked for a little while."

"Well, that's a relief. Is she alright?"

I hesitate. "She's not sick, if that's what you mean."

"Then what-"

I cut her off. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Matsumoto, but can't tell you the details. She has a family matter going on, and I don't think it's in my place to tell you without her permission." When Chiharu is ready, she'll talk to Mrs. Matsumoto herself.

There's a pause. "As long as she's going to be alright, I will respect your decision, Sakura. I think you're mature enough to decide whether or not to tell me."

"Thank you for understanding." Mrs. Matsumoto has always treated us like adults and allowed us to make our own decisions. That's one of the reasons she lets me work so hard. It's because she trusts me to be mature enough to know when I've reached my limit.

"Do you know when she'll be returning to work?"

"I'm not sure, but it will probably be within the next few days. She's a strong girl; I'm sure she'll be back soon." She has to be.

"Alright. Thank you, Sakura." I can tell she's wrapping things up, so I follow suit.

"Anytime. I'll talk to you at work tomorrow, then. Good night." I hang up the phone.

* * *

When I get to school Tuesday morning, I'm shocked to find Syaoran already there. Skating up to him I can't help commenting, "you're here early." I come to a steady halt about three feet away from him.

"Yeah, I've gotta talk to you this morning."

Talk? My heart pounds anxiously in my chest. Surely he doesn't mean _that, _does he? It's only Tuesday, yet this week has proven to be even more stressful than the last.

"Yesterday I talked to Mr. Terada," he starts. Mental sigh. I swear he did that on purpose. I already have enough to worry about without him causing me extra stress. "I asked him how long I would be tutoring you for."

Did you, now? I'm surprised that I hadn't thought to ask myself earlier. "What did he say?"

"Midterms."

I consider this. "Well that's not _so_ bad. I was worried you were going to say finals or something."

Syaoran raises his eyebrows. "Yeah, well, don't go getting too excited. Mr. Terada isn't letting us off the hook quite that easily. There's a catch."

My ears perk up. "A catch? What do you mean, 'a catch'?" I glare at him in suspicion.

"You have to pass them. _All_ of them."

_What?_ "Pass them?" He nods. "You've gotta be kidding me." I say it out load without meaning to. Sure, it sounds simple enough, but I'm still really behind in all of my subjects. Most of what we learned this year just went in one ear and out the other.

"Yeah, that's what I said, but there's nothing we can do about it. If we're going to do this it's going to be some intense studying on your part. You got that?"

I feel a pout forming on my lips. "Got it." This is just great. At this rate I'll be stuck with him for the rest of the year. This must be some cruel trick of fate.

"Good. We better get started, then." He leads the way into the building.

We spend the entire time from when we sit down to when the five minute bell rings doing serious studying. I try to listen to what Syaoran is saying, but my mind keeps flicking over to Chiharu and wondering whether or not she'll show up for school today.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

_Ring! Ring! Ring!_

I sight in relief at the familiar sound of the lunch bell. I waste no time in grabbing my things and heading next door. I spot my black haired friend immediately. He's sitting in the same spot that he always is, only this time he's alone. As I walk over to him I glance around the room.

"Takashi," I say walking up to him. He looks up from the bento he's just pulled out. His appearance worries me a little. He looks like he didn't get any sleep last night. There are dark bags under his eyes, and his posture seems worse than usual.

"Hey, Syaoran," he says, tiredly. He reminds me of someone who just found out they didn't get into the college of their choice.

"I take it Chiharu is absent again today." I don't see her anywhere in the room, and she wasn't here yesterday, either.

Takashi's mood seems to drop even more, if that's possible. "Seems like it."

I find it strange. She didn't seem sick to me last time we saw each other, but who knows.-

I pull out the chair in front of his desk and sit down. "Have you heard from her?"

He sets the chopsticks carefully down on the bento box. "She texted me last night."

I feel relief course through me. Chiharu and I aren't super close, but I still eat with her and Takashi everyday. We talk all the time, just not necessarily about things that are important. Mostly random things like homework and other school stuff.

"So, what did she say?"

Takashi reads my face, deciding whether or not to tell me before saying, "she didn't give me the details. All she said was 'they finally made it official'."

"Do you know what she meant?" I may not talk to her about these sorts of things, but over the years I've picked up on some things about Chiharu. Enough to guess what she meant, but I decide not to jump to conclusion.

"I have a pretty good idea, but I shouldn't go saying anything until I know for sure."

I nod in agreement. If my prediction is right, it's not the sort of thing you hear through speculation or rumors.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Chiharu wasn't at school today. I wasn't that hopeful that she would be, all things considered. So, when I get to work and find her in the lounge sitting across from Mrs. Matsumoto at the table, I'm more than a little surprised.

"You're back already?" Upon seeing her the words escape my lips. The two of them turn to me.

Chiharu looks at me indifferently. "Yeah. I wasn't sure I was ready to face everybody at school, so I figured I'd come into work a little early to get out of the house." She seems so calm, that I'm a little surprised. Maybe working helps calm her down.

"Oh. I see." I look over to our manager. "Did you..." I trail of, hoping Chiharu will pick up on what I'm saying so that I don't have to outright ask.

Mrs. Matsumoto answers in her place. Clearing her throat, she says, "Chiharu informed me of her family situation when she arrived here at noon."

I nod, accepting the explanation. I turn to Chiharu again. "Do you think you'll be back to school tomorrow?"

Rika turns in her chair so her body is facing me. "About that," she starts. "I'm going to need to take you up on that offer from last night." I find it hard not to show my surprise.

I feel my head bob up and down. "Of course."

"I need you to gather up some people for me tomorrow. I want to tell everyone together. At first I was going to do it at lunch, but I think after school would be best." She turns to Mrs. Matsumoto. "Would you mind if Sakura and I are a little late tomorrow afternoon?"

Mrs. Matsumoto wastes not time thinking it over. "Not at all, Chiharu. Take care of what you need to."

"Do you want me there when you tell them?"

She nods. "If you don't mind." I don't mind, but I also don't understand. "I'd feel more comfortable with someone who already knows there."

I suppose that makes sense. "So, what do you want me to tell them?"

"You can just say that I need to talk to them after school in the courtyard. By 'them' I mean Tomoyo, Rika, Takashi and Li."

My blood runs cold at the last name. I already knew that they were friends, so I shouldn't be surprised, but this is going to be a lot harder with him around. I have to remind myself that this is for Chiharu's sake.

"Alright. I'll round them up tomorrow and we'll meet you in front of the school, then?" She nods. "Okay," I say quietly.

Tomorrow is going to be one interesting day.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

I arrive to school before Sakura again on Wednesday. I wasn't even trying this time, so I'm not sure why. Five minutes later when she shows up, I see the reason.

I'm leaning against the brick wall when I hear footsteps from my left. Out of second nature I turn my head. Initially it was going to be a side glance at the passerby, but when I see Sakura walking up to me in normal shoes I stop and stare. Not at her face, but at her feet.

"No roller blades today? That's a first." I didn't even know she _had_ regular shoes.

She doesn't acknowledge my comment. "I need to talk to you, Li."

Her serious tone makes me look up at her for the first time. Her gaze is is firm, and demands my attention.

"What is it," I find myself asking.

She doesn't so much as blink at my question. "I talked to Chiharu yesterday."

My eyes go wide. Since when were Chiharu and Sakura talking to each other again? Did I miss something? And why would she have talked to _Sakura_ of all people? Could Sakura know where she is? Of course. She just said that she talked to her.

Questions are still running through my head when she goes on.

"She asked me to tell you, Tomoyo, Rika, and Yamazaki that she needs to talk to all of you in the courtyard after school today."

"Tomoyo, Rika, and Takashi?"

"And you." Obviously, otherwise she wouldn't be telling me this.

I decide to see just how much Sakura knows by asking, "did she say why?"

"That's why she needs to talk to you." Way to be cryptic. Her emerald eyes study me for a moment. "Do me a favor, Li?"

"Depends."

"Can you tell Yamazaki for me? You know him way better than I do."

Yeah, and _we_ know each other _so_ well. I keep the thought to myself.

"Sure."

"Thanks." She sidesteps me and starts walking forward. "We should get started, then."

I frown, confused, at her retreating figure. I almost forgot about the reason we were here. "Right." I follow her into the building.

* * *

When the final bell rings, I wait behind with the others. While our classmates rush out of the classroom, we wait inside for a few minutes to let them head out before meeting Chiharu.

Takashi walks in after the other students are gone and walks over to me. During lunch I told him about what Sakura said to me. He seemed just as surprised by it as I was.

Rika also stands up from her spot at the front of the room and walks back to the rest of us. Tomoyo acknowledges her, but I just turn to Sakura, who is peering out the window. Her eyes rapidly travel across the many students leaving the school grounds. Without warning they stop and she leans in closer to the window, putting her hand against it.

"Do you see her?"

A frown forms on her face. "I'm not sure, but I think so. If I'm right, she's across the street."

"We should probably get going, then." I stand up and grab my bag. Sakura and Tomoyo follow suit and all of us leave the classroom together.

* * *

If it hadn't been for Chiharu's mysterious meeting, I might find this rather provoking. It feels more than a little strange standing here in the courtyard with everyone. I never would have expected to see all of us gathered around. Especially considering Sakura's here. There's a lot of history in our little group.

By the time we arrive out front, we find Chiharu already there waiting for us under one of the trees.

Rika rushes up to her first, throwing her arms around her. Over Rika's shoulder, Chiharu looks at Sakura and nods. Sakura mirrors the action in return, and walks off to the side.

Takashi goes behind Rika and rests his hand on her shoulder. She reluctantly pulls away and Takashi removes his hand.

"You want to talk to us," Takashi says it like it's a question.

"I do." Chiharu glances back at Tomoyo and I. "I'm sorry to ask you all out here after school, but it seemed like the best time to tell everyone. As you may have already guessed, I'm not sick."

Rika's expression turns puzzled. "But you-" She doesn't finish. Chiharu gives her a sad smile and Rika shuts her mouth.

"Come on, Rika. We all saw this coming." Rika looks down, biting her lip. "Everyone is already thinking it, so I'll just come right out and say it." She lets her gaze sweep over all of us before it finally stops on Takashi. "My parents are getting a divorce."

I feel guilty thinking that I was right. We all had our suspicions about Chiharu and her family. I'm sure Takashi has known for a while now. After Sakura called us all together saying Chiharu needed to talk to us together, we all knew it was something important. More than just a mere sickness.

Now I remember Sakura. My eyes make there way over to where she stands listening on the sidelines. Why would Chiharu have wanted her here for this? Why doesn't Sakura look surprised? It hits me like a ton of bricks. How had I not seen it? Sakura already knew.

She must sense my gaze, because she turns her head to look at me. I read her face, trying to uncover the reason.

I can hear Takashi say something, but it doesn't register.

"You already knew," I state incredulously. Her gaze doesn't falter. I shouldn't be so surprised. The fact that she was the one to gather us had already told me something was up. The real question now is: why Sakura of all people?

The others look between the two of us. Chiharu speaks before anything else can be said.

"I told her." Sakura brakes eye contact with me, and she and Chiharu have a silent exchange. "She stopped by my house Monday, and I told her then. Yesterday afternoon I asked her to gather all of you here for me."

Takashi looks at her similar to the way I look at Sakura.

"Why was she at your house in the first place?" It slips out before I can stop it.

Does it really matter? Even if it does, this isn't the time to be asking.

Chiharu eyes me. "You all seem way more interested in why Sakura is involved than the actual reason I called you here."

Crap. She's right. We should be worried about Chiharu and her family, not the reason her ex-best friend is the first person she told.

I open my mouth to apologize, but before I can something stops me. It's Chiharu. Her lips just moved. Upwards. "It's kind of refreshing." She lets out a dry laugh. "Sakura stopped by Monday night because our manager asked her to."

My brain takes a moment to process what she's just said. Everyone else seems to come to an understanding, but I'm more confused than ever. '_Our_ manger', she said.

"Do you two work together?"

Sakura watches silently while Chiharu nods. Well, that sure explains a lot. But, wait, that just makes things confusing in a totally different way. I want to ask so many questions, but Takashi's voice snaps me out of it.

"Chiharu." His voice is dead serious now, causing all of us to fall silent and look at him. Even his eyes are open and looking straight at Chiharu. "Are you going to be alright?"

I watch Chiharu's reaction. She studies Takashi's eyes as if trying to find the answer to the question within them, and then says in a firm voice, "yes."

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

After Chiharu's announcement we all went our separate ways. Well, all except for Chiharu and I, who are currently walking down the sidewalk together on our way to work. I'm wearing my normal shoes today specifically because I expected we would be walking together. I don't try to force conversation onto her, so we walk side by side in a comfortable silence.

"Sakura," Chiharu calls my name, breaking the silence. I look over, and wait for her to continue. "Thank you." The statement surprises me, and I raise my eyebrows to silently ask her why. She sees my reaction and continues. "For everything." She smiles at me, and find myself smiling back.

Maybe- just maybe- given time, Chiharu will come to accept me in her life again.

* * *

****I'd really like to hear thoughts about the flow of the story. Does it seem like I'm going all over the place? I'll be anxiously awaiting any reviews.****

**Thanks for reading!**


	6. Friendships

**It's finally Saturday, so, as promised, I've got a new chapter.**

**This one you get to see Tomoyo's POV!**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Crap! Oh, crap, crap, crap! I'm so late! Syaoran is going to kill me!

My eyes shoot back to the clock hanging on the wall behind me. 8:05. I haven't even left the house yet! Stupid unreliable alarm clocks.

Pulling on my jacket, I throw myself out the front door and jump down the front steps. Zipping down the streets, I try not to think too hard about how pissed off Syaoran probably is right now.

Turning the corner along the side of the school's brick wall, I, yet again, nearly run into someone. I take the turn hard and fast, and by the time I look up and see the figure fifteen feet ahead of me I'm going to quickly to stop.

"Look out!" I make a failed attempt to stop. I know it won't work but I try it anyways. I lean back and put all of my weight onto the brake.

The person turns in time for us to crash into each other head on. It happens in mere seconds after that.

My outstretched arms come in contact with something sturdy, but my feet continue on, sliding right in between the other persons legs, and sending me reeling backwards. Instinctively I grab onto the broad shoulders in front of me to keep myself upright, but in the end we both go tumbling, me first.

Mid-fall I feel an arm wrap around me and my upper body presses against theirs. I hear a thud as we hit the ground. Or, rather, the person holding me hits the ground. Their knees and right arm hit the ground very painfully, I imagine. There's a groan and I can tell my savior is male. Well that, and that my chest is pressed against his and I can feel that it's flat and sturdy. The arm holding me against him prevents me from taking any damage from the fall besides my bottom. My arms are wrapped around his shoulders at this point.

Slowly, I feel him lower me until my back is against the sidewalk. He leans down with me, and then pulls his arm out from under me. I remove my arms from around him and he pushes himself up a little. FInally, I see his face.

No way! "Li," I squeak.

"The one and only," he sarcastically repeats the line I once used on him.

He groans, head down and eyes pinched shut, as he brings himself up onto both of his hands. His shaggy chocolate hair partly hides his face, but I can still see as his eyelids rise to reveal amber eyes. With one hard blink, he brings his head up and meets my gaze. I can see lines between his eyebrows as they tug together in a wince. After a second he realizes how close we are, something that came to my attention the moment I realized who he was. Our faces are inches apart.

"Well, this is awkward."

I grind my teeth. Way to state the obvious, genius. "Then get off me."

One of those smirks of his appears. How can he be so calm in this situation? "I think I'm rather enjoying this. You should see your face." I don't think I want to know how red it is right now.

"Get the hell _off_!"

He gives me a suggestive look. "Oh, someone's feisty."

"So help me, Li, you may be some highly trained martial artist, but I'll knee you where the sun doesn't shine if you don't move your fat ass!" I'm embarrassed just saying it, but it's all I can think of. I'd never actually have the guts to do it.

He feigns a look of hurt. "You'd ruin my chances of ever having children? That's a little cruel, don't you think?"

Oh my- when I get my hands on this bastard.

I shove myself up, almost bumping noses with him, but not quite. His eyes widen at the sudden closeness, and I take the opportunity to give him the most threatening look I can manage. "Don't test me, Li."

Whatever I did does the trick.

I think I see Syaoran's face turn a little pink, but he pulls himself off of me before I can be sure. He coughs, lifting his arm to cover his face. It's scratched from the pavement. I push myself upright to get a better look at it. "Are you okay?" I look back into his eyes.

"Peachy." His face is indifferent.

"But your arm."

He turns it around, examining it. "It'll be fine in a day or two." It falls back to his side.

I start to try standing up, only to slip and fall froward. Of course, with Syaoran right in front of me, I never hit the ground. He reaches down and pulls me into an embrace. My face meets his chest and starts to heat up all over again.

Syaoran pulls me all the way to my feet and then takes me by the elbow.

"Grab onto my arms." His voice is soft this time as he guides me.

I take his arms, mine now overlapping his. Pulling my head away from him, I keep my face turned down to watch my feet. Thank goodness for the autumn breeze; It's the only thing keeping my face even a little cool.

As I steady myself, he asks, "you good?" All I can do is nod, not trusting my voice.

He slowly lets go and pulls his hands away. Fully dropping his arms down, he says, "well, at least you didn't run into the wall this time around."

Embarrassment gives way to shock. Is he serious? I look up to find him smirking again. Ugh! Just stop it, now.

As much as I want to stomp away from him angrily, I can't, so I cross my arms and skate past him. Approaching the gate, I throw a glance over my shoulder to find him still standing there, only now he's turned around facing me. He watches me with a blank stare.

"Hey!" He blinks as if coming out of a trance. "You gonna keep standing there like an idiot?"

He shoots me a dirty look, but follows.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

Near the end of the lesson, Sakura suddenly shoots her head up like she's remembered something important.

"Hey," she says to get my attention. Doesn't make much sense, considering I'm already looking at her. She's supposed to be listening to what I'm explaining to her.

"Hi." I say it just annoy her. Successfully, might I add. She gives me one of those 'what-the-heck?' looks.

She just shakes her head after a moment, and continues what she was going to say. "I just remembered! What the hell was up with you yesterday?"

I think back to the day before. Oh great. I already feel like shit for not being more considerate of Chiharu's feelings; I don't need Sakura reminding me of how much of a douche I was. "What," I grumble, dreading what she's about say.

"Don't you 'what' me! What were you thinking? When someone tells you that their parents are getting a divorce you don't go and say something stupid like," she pulls her head down and says in a snooty voice, "'you told _her_ first?'" Sakura points at the space next to me to indicate 'her'.

I feel an imaginary vein pop. "I hardly think it's your place to lecture me. Are you two even friends?" Looks like that set her off. Remember how I said she was feisty?

"We're coworkers. I'm allowed to look out for her." She shakes her head trying to cool herself off. "Anyways, you need to apologize." Like I wasn't already going to.

"What are you: my mother?"

Her face turns red. "Y-you-" She clearly doesn't have a comeback. Sucks to be you, Sakura. Muahaha. "Gah!" She shoots up from her seat and storms off.

Wait- what? Where the hell is she going?

"Where do you think you're going," I call after her.

"I don't know!"

Well, that sure explains a lot. "You forgot your things."

Suddenly, she's walking back to where I am. "I knew that!" She grabs her things and stomps back over to the door, struggling to hold everything.

At this point I'm resisting the urge to laugh. I almost want her to leave so that I can. Unfortunately, I don't last very long.

When she reaches the door, Sakura is unable to open it due to all the books in her arms. The sight causes me to make a 'pft' sound. She hears me and turns around. "Shut up!" This girl is a riot.

She somehow manages to open the door and then storms out. I kind of wonder where she's going. Then the five minute bell rings, and I have my answer. The same place as me. The dreaded classroom. Well, off I go. Shoot me now, please.

* * *

All throughout class I can feel a dark aura emanating from the person in front of me. I'm just thankful our seats aren't switched. I think I'd fall over dead from all the death glares she'd give me. At least in front of me, she can't actually look at me. Still, it feels like there are eyes in the back of her head.

I'm relieved when the lunch bell finally rings. I slip out of the room before anyone else can even move.

Opening the door to the next class over, I find both Takashi and Chiharu inside. Seeing Chiharu looking like nothing ever happened makes me both relaxed and on edge at the same time. Talk about conflicting emotions. I walk over to them slowly, and Takashi catches sight of me first.

"Syaoran!" He waves to me. Chiharu looks over to me.

"Hey, Takashi." I look down at Chiharu. "Mihara, can I talk to you?"

She looks unsure, and somewhat shocked. She glances over to Takashi, who shrugs. Her eyes meet mine again. "Sure. What is it, Li?"

"About yesterday," I start. "I didn't mean to seem inconsiderate. I'm sorry if I offended you." I really hate apologizing, but in this situation it seems like the right thing to do. Takashi is my best friend, and he and Chiharu go back before I even knew him, so I need to keep peace with her. Not to mention, Takashi is totally in love with her; And probably vice versa. Plus, I was a total ass yesterday.

Chiharu and Takashi both look shocked. Probably because my apologies are so uncommon. Chiharu recovers enough to speak again. "It's fine, Li. I know you didn't mean to. I actually find it kind of funny."

I raise an eyebrow. "How so," I find myself asking. I can't think of anything even remotely 'funny' about it.

She looks at me knowingly with a half smile on her face. "As much as you claim that you don't want anything to do with her, you still focus on all things Sakura."

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

When lunch rolls around I tell Tomoyo to eat lunch with Rika and Chiharu without me. I use the excuse that I have to finish something for tutoring, which is kind of true. She leaves reluctantly, and I head to up to the rooftop to eat my lunch alone. The truth is that I want Tomoyo to be there with Chiharu and everyone else. I'd like to be there for her, too, but I'm not sure that's the best idea.

Chiharu, Takashi, Syaoran, and Tomoyo make up a group of tight-knit friends; A group that I, too, used to be part of, but after I cut ties with Syaoran, the group started to split. When Chiharu stopped speaking to me, it basically left me isolated, with Tomoyo as my only connection to the old group. Luckily, Tomoyo managed to maintain her friendship with both parties. The incident was before Rika moved here, and since Takashi is so close to Chiharu, naturally we didn't continue to interact.

Basically, I can't eat with them.

I finish my lunch about fifteen minutes into the break, leaving me with a whole forty five minutes left with nothing to do. I decide to head to the library to crack a book for the rest of lunch.

Entering the library, I find it rather quiet. I head down one of the rows and scan the books. Reference section. Yuck! Get me as far away from here as possible, please. I quickly hustle my way over to the teen fiction area, and begin to browse my options.

No. No. Maybe. N- wait, should this even be in a high school? Baffled and somewhat disturbed, I shove the book back into its place on the shelf, and pull out another book that looks less- er- _mature_. Ah, much better. The cover of the book has a dragon on it, so I think I should be okay to read it without my face turning into a tomato.

Leaving the row, I go to sit down at an empty table in the back. I open the book to the first page and begin to read. I didn't actually look to see what the book is about, but so far it seems interesting enough.

I've only been reading for about five minutes when I hear the chair in front of me being dragged across the floor. I look up. My gaze is met by a pair of deep brown eyes framed by large wire glasses. The face of an intellectual woman looks down at me. I almost mistake her for a teacher, but she's wearing the school uniform, so she must be a student. She smiles brightly, and tilts her head to the side a little, her bob cut hair swaying.

"Do you mind if I sit here?" Her voice is so mature!

I shake my head. "Not at all. Go ahead."

She quietly takes a seat, and pulls the chair in. I look back down to my book, but watch through my bangs as she pulls a journal from her bag, opens it to a blank page, and starts to write.

After a minute, I'm startled when she speaks. "I can see you watching me, you know." There's a small smile on her lips when she lifts her eyes to look at me through her bangs as I'm doing to her.

I'm filled with shame. "Sorry," I say, trying to look down at my book again, but then look up at her again, this time lifting my head a bit. She mimics my action. "It's just that- well- you look like a teacher, but you're wearing a uniform. Are you a student?"

She giggles. "I get that a lot. Yes, I'm a student; Just a senior."

No way! I shoot up in my seat. "Really? Same. What class?"

"I'm in 3-A."

"Wow, that's right next door to me. I'm in 3-B. How have I not seen you before?"

She shrugs. "I suppose you could say that I just blend well in a crowd. My name is Naoko Yanagisawa, by the way."

"Oh. I'm Sakura Kinomoto. Nice to meet you." I find myself smiling. It's always interesting meeting new people like this.

"Likewise." Her eyes move down to my book. "So, I don't mean to pry, but what are you reading?"

"Ugh, I don't really know." I hold up the book to show her. "I just picked it up off the shelf because it looked normal enough."

Her eyes light up when she sees the cover. "I've read that one before. It's a wonderful book. The characters are likable, and the plot is unique." She speaks with a sense of passion. I can feel her love for the book just through her voice.

"I only just started, but it seems interesting so far. I'm not entirely sure what it's about, though. I assume there's a dragon in it." I look at the cover of the book again.

A frown forms on her face. "Didn't you read the summery?"

I sheepishly shake my head. "No, I saw it and figured it would be interesting, so I just sat down and started reading."

She tisks. "Bold move. Want me to give you a rundown?"

I can't help but sigh in relief. "Would you? It's kind of nerve wracking having no idea what's going on."

Her head bobs. "Sure. So, basically-" She proceeds to give me a basic idea of what the book is about.

I don't realize how long we're just sitting there talking until the warning bell rings. I lift my head up in alarm.

"Wow, already? How long have we been talking?" I glance over to the clock. "Oh my gosh!" I look back to Naoko with an apologetic gaze. "I'm so sorry, I totally kept you from your work."

This time she shakes her head. "Nah, I'm just writing something for the fun of it. No biggy, and besides, this has been really fun for me." I feel a little thankful hearing this.

"Me, too. We should do it again sometime." Naoko seems like a really nice person, and when I talk to her I feel all my worries just fly away.

"Sure. I come here everyday during lunch, so feel free to sit with me anytime."

I can't seem to stop smiling. I just met someone new, and now we're already talking about meeting up during future lunches.

"I'll be sure to stop by every now and then." It'll probably end up being more often than just 'now and then'. Who knew the library was such a good lunch spot? "Do you wanna walk back together?"

"I don't see why not. Are you going to check that out?" She nods to the book in my hands. I look down at it and debate.

"No, I think I'll leave it. Gives me an actual reason to come here and talk to you." Not to mention that I don't have _time_ to read a book in my spare time.

I get up and set the book back on the shelf. We then proceed to head out of the library and to class together. When we reach Naoko's classroom I wave goodbye and head next door to 3-B.

I'm still smiling as I walk through the door. Tomoyo is already back from having lunch, and watches as I walk up.

"Have a good lunch, I take it?"

I nod and plop down in my seat. "I did, indeed. You should have lunch with Chiharu again tomorrow." I don't want to seem like I'm trying to get rid of Tomoyo, but now she can actually go be with Chiharu without me being lonely.

"Are you sure?" Tomoyo is always hesitant about leaving me alone.

"I am. She needs you more than I do right now. Besides, there's a book that I want to read in the library."

She looks a little relieved. "Thank you, Sakura." Even though Tomoyo tries not to show it too much, she's really worried about Chiharu.

"Don't mention it."

* * *

When I arrive home after work, I find Touya in the family room watching T.V. Glancing around the room, I walk up to him and sit down. "You seen dad today?"

A look of distaste crosses his face. "Does it matter? He's probably off at some bar again." Yeah, probably.

I lean back against the couch. "So, have you heard back from that job yet?" I try not to look to anxious.

His eyes light up. "Right, I almost forgot." Touya picks up the remote and mutes the T.V. "They just called earlier today." He turns to face me.

"So? What did they say?" He stays silent for a moment just to see my reaction. You're killing me here, Touya!

Finally he speaks. "I got the job."

I shoot up from my seat and dance around the room. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I don't really even know who I'm thanking, but I'm too relieved to stop.

Touya's laughter comes from the couch behind me. "Calm down, kaiju."

"Don't call me that!" He disregards my protest.

"I don't start up work there until the Monday after next."

I sit down again and pull my knees up to my chest. "Maybe, but that's not too far away."

He sighs. "Yeah, I guess." He looks me in the eyes. "As soon as I start working there, you're cutting back on your hours, alright?"

I roll my eyes. "Yeah, I know." It's not like I _enjoy_ working from sunup to sundown. The only reason I do it is so that we can pay the bills.

"Good. Now, go eat something and get to bed." He's so demanding.

I get up reluctantly and head off the the kitchen. Looks like I'll be having leftovers again tonight.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

Friday is one of my favorite days of the week. Why? Because, it's right before Saturday, and Saturday is the weekend. So, as I trudge to school this morning, I just think about tomorrow.

Upon my arrival, I find Sakura standing in front of the gate holding an umbrella in her hand. Weird part is that it's not raining.

"What's with the umbrella?"

"It's supposed to rain this afternoon," she states.

"Yeah, well it's still the morning, and nothings falling. Why is it open?"

She just shrugs. "I got bored, so I opened it."

Wow. She's _so_ strange sometimes. What am I saying? _All_ the time.

I shake my head and stroll past her. Just keep walking, Syaoran.

"Hey, wait a minute, Li." She rolls up next to me. "Did you talk to Chiharu?"

I stop walking, and she follows suit. "Look, Kinomoto. I don't know how to put this nicely, so I'm just gonna say it." She turns to look at me. "It's really not any of your business. Maybe it was once, but not anymore." I can see her expression change. She's not angry anymore. Well, she is, but now it's because I've hurt her. I hate it when she looks like that, even now, but I don't let it get to me. "So, stop nagging me like you and Chiharu are suddenly best friends again."

It takes all of my courage to turn away form her and head into the building.

* * *

Sakura is quiet throughout the lesson. She mainly just nods in understanding, and when she doesn't know something, she glares angrily at the paper rather than asking me. At first I just let her be stubborn, but after a while of us getting absolutely nowhere, I have no choice but to step in.

"If you don't know how to do it, you can just ask."

"Who says I don't know how to do it?" She defensively raises her voice.

"You've been on that problem for the past five minutes, and you've written two things."

She thrusts the paper at me. "Fine, then show me what the hell I'm doing wrong."

I take the paper from her and set it down facing her again. "Alright, but first you need to take a deep breath and focus."

She grumbles under her breath for a moment, but when I give her one of my don't-mess-with-me looks, she glares at me and gives in. Her eyes drift closed and she inhales deeply. Then she exhales. When she reopens her eyes, I can she the frustration slowly dying off.

"Good, now look at me." Her eyes meet mine and I feel my breath catch in my throat. Focus, Syaoran! I pull myself back to reality before she can notice. "You need to concentrate on what I'm trying to teach you. If you have a question, you need to ask. Got that?" That concentration part is also for me.

Sakura nods.

"Okay, then. Let's try this again." I lean forward and begin to explain to her how to do the problem.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Syaoran has been re-explaining old material to me like nobody's business. He's really good at it, to be honest. Even though I feel uncomfortable around him, and sometimes want to slap him across the face as hard as I can, he still manages to get the material through to me. It's actually pretty impressive. Not that I would ever say any of that to his face... Well, I mean, technically, I kinda already did, but come on! He got me to do a math problem correctly on my own after less than an hour. That takes some serious skills. If he weren't going to inherit the Li Corporation in Hong Kong when he's older, I'd say he should be a teacher.

When we wrap up the lesson, he begins to leave ahead of me, and I have to muster up all my courage to call out to him. "Li!" I almost don't want him to stop and turn around, but he does. Oh, what am I doing? "About earlier," I begin slowly. I have to force myself to look him in the eyes. "You were right." I see his eyes widen. Yeah, I'm just as perplexed as you are. Why am I doing this again? "It's not my place to say anything. It won't happen again." You can be sure of that, though. No way am I touching anything even remotely related to the past with him ever again.

He studies me for a moment, before nodding and turning to leave. I keep my distance as I follow him silently to class. My eyes stay trained on his heels the entire time. Left. Right. Left. Right. Stop. We enter the classroom. Class starts a few minutes later.

When lunch rolls around, I scarf down my food and head straight for the library. It takes me a little longer than yesterday, so by the time I get there Naoko is already seated in her spot from yesterday, writing in her notebook. Her hand flies across the paper at lightning speed. I almost stand there and gawk, but manage to walk up to her instead.

As I set my empty bento box down on the table, her hand stops and she looks up. "You're back!" She smiles brightly.

"Yeah. Gotta find out what happens in that book." I turn and walk down the isle the book is in and pull it off the shelf. Sitting down again, I open the book to the page I was on and begin reading.

Time seems to fly as my eyes skim the pages. Somewhere around forty minutes later, the bell rings. My eyes dart to the clock. "Darn it."

In front of me Naoko speaks. "Can't pull yourself away?" I look to find her giving me a knowing smile as she sets down her pencil.

"Yeah. I just finished this chapter, and it's a total cliffhanger."

"Well, I guess you'll have to wait until Monday to find out what happens."

I groan, but shut the book and put it back. "This is going to be one long weekend."

She simply lets out a carefree laugh, and we head back to class together.

* * *

**Tomoyo's POV**

"Say, Tomoyo, where is Sakura?" Rika's voice snaps me out of my daydream. I'm sitting in classroom 3-C with Chiharu and the others, eating lunch. It's only the second day that I've had lunch with them and not Sakura, but I can't stop wondering how she's doing.

I look up at Rika. "She's having lunch by herself today. She said something about going to the library to read a book." When Sakura told me she was okay with me having lunch with Chiharu again, I was grateful to say the least. I've been worried about Chiharu all week, so Sakura insisted I have lunch with Chiharu.

"Why do you ask?"

"It's just that you two always eat lunch together, so I was wondering if maybe she wanted to eat with us."

My mind races. Sometimes I forget that Rika wasn't in Tomoeda before Sakura's split from the rest of the group. Lately, so much has been happening, and Sakura has been interacting with Chiharu and Li so much that Rika's observation only seems natural.

"Oh, er-" I glance over to Chiharu. She watches us quietly. "I don't think that's the best idea."

"Why not? I mean, I know that Li-kun-" Li's head zips in our direction- "and Sakura-chan had that falling out of theirs, but I don't see why she can't have lunch with us."

Li lets out a dry laugh. "Falling out? Is that what she calls it?" Takashi smacks Li's shoulder with the back of his hand and indicates for him to stop talking. Li grumbles something incoherent and turns to look out the window again.

I focus my attention on Rika again, who's watching Li in confusion. "It's kind of-" I try to think of the word- "complicated." Her frown only seems to deepen.

Suddenly Chiharu leans forward and speaks. "It's alright, Tomoyo. She's going to find out sooner or later." Chiharu turns to face Rika, and when she speaks again. her voice is serious. "Since pre-school up until about five years ago, Sakura and I were really close friends."

Rika's eyes enlarge listening to Chiharu's words. "You, too? What happened?"

Chiharu has a troubled look on her face. "I don't know if you knew this or not, Rika, but Sakura doesn't have a mother." I see Li's eyes drift over to Chiharu. "She passed away when Sakura was ten years old."

Rika looks down, appearing remorseful. "I'd heard rumors about it, but never really thought much of it."

She returns her gaze to Chiharu, who lowers her voice a little. We're huddled close together like children telling ghost stories around a camp fire. "I don't want to go gossiping about all the details, but Sakura's family took it pretty hard. She changed afterwards. She was in a really dark place for a while." All of us are watching Chiharu at this point. Hanging on her every word. Pretty bizarre, considering the rest of us already know what happened. "Anyways, Sakura used to always come to Tomoyo and I for consoling, but after a while I couldn't take it anymore."

"I understand, but that's all in the past now. Can't you two try to work it out?"

Chiharu frowns like she doesn't know what to say. Then, Li's voice interjects from his spot beside the window. "It might not be my place to say this, but Sasaki has a point." We all look at him totally bewildered.

Chiharu pokes at her food anxiously. "It's not like we can just suddenly go back to being friends again after all this time. Anyways, how can you say that so lightly after it happened to you, too, Li?"

Li's expression hardens and his face seems to become darker. "I never had a say in what happened with Sakura and I. You, on the other hand, did. It's clear that she still thinks of you as a friend. There's nothing holding you back from rekindling that friendship with her."

Chiharu remains silent for a moment, and then finally says, "Can we stop talking about this?" I watch thoughtfully as Chiharu turns away from us.

What Li and Rika have proposed is something that I have not dared allow myself to wish for. If Sakura and Chiharu did indeed go back to being friends, I wouldn't have to choose between two sides. Sure, Sakura might not want to eat lunch with us if Li is around, but he's tutoring her already, so it's not like they don't know how to be in each other's presence.

I allow my gaze to wander to where Li sits, now quietly eating his lunch and looking out the window as if nothing happened. It's strange hearing him talk about Sakura, especially knowing everything about that went down between the two of them. They used to be so close. She would go to him, rather than me, sometimes. Then everything changed. Sakura had told me all of the things she went through during those first few months that he wasn't there for her. She told me all of her deepest darkest secrets, and to be honest, knowing them sometimes makes me feel suffocated. I can't imagine what it must be like for Sakura to feel that firsthand.

The rest of lunch is spent in silence. None of us know what to say. When the bell finally rings, I can almost hear a collective sigh of relief pass over our little group. What we've been talking about really isn't the sort of conversation you have during a school lunch.

When Sakura shows up in our classroom, Rika, Li, and I have already returned. She sees Rika first, then her eyes drift Li and I sitting in the back. She walks down the isle and speaks in a low voice, stopping in front of my desk. "What's with the long faces?"

I'm too tired to speak, so I simply shake my head. It's not like I can tell her, anyways. I have this rule: don't go repeating what you hear from one side to the other. If I did that, everything would come crumbling apart. It's hard being the one in the middle. One wrong move and I could be the cause of a full blown war.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I was right. By the time the final bell rings, it's pouring buckets outside. I mill quickly through the hallway to my locker. It'll take extra long to get to work today. I won't be able to blade with the water on the sidewalks, and the umbrella in my hand, so I'll have to walk.

As I'm making my way out the front door, umbrella in hand, something catches my eye. Or, rather- some_one_. Chiharu stands under the outside overhang, just barely out of reach from the pelting rain. I have a silent war within myself before walking up to her and saying, "wanna share?"

She looks over at me, startled. Then she looks confused. I point to the pink umbrella in my hand. Her eyes travel down to it, and realization passes her face.

"Oh, um. . ." She glances to the sky beyond the overhand, and then back to me. "Sure." I can hear the hesitation in her voice, but decide not to think much of it.

So, together we head to Twin Bells Cafe, walking shoulder to shoulder under the bright pink covering of my umbrella.

* * *

**I've realized something as I write. My chapters are getting longer and longer. I have to split the next one into two. Very sad.**

**What'd you all think of Tomoyo's POV? Like it or not, she's going to be in it more as the story progresses.**

**You also met Naoko in this chapter. Pretty happy about that, myself.**


	7. Sakura's Downfall

**Readers, I wanted to make a quick note that- just so you don't feel totally blindsided next chapter- Syaoran is from Hong Kong in this Fanfic. I kept it like the anime in a lot of ways, that being one. I should've clarified that, but if you watched the anime, it's kind of common knowledge.**

**On with the chapter.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

The weekend seems to fly right by. One minute it's Friday night, and the next it's Monday morning.

Rolling to school, it feels like an effort just keeping my eyes open. When I woke up this morning, I started to feel the effects of all the long hours. Touya starts up work again next week, so it's not so bad. I should be able to get through the rest of the week without too much trouble.

I get to school before Syaoran, as usual, but today it feels like a lot longer before he shows up.

As soon as I see him walking my way, I check my watch. Just as suspected; He's five minutes late. So much for punctuality. To think, just last week I nearly severely injured both of us trying to get here on time. Clearly he doesn't share the same concern as I do.

I don't wait around for him to walk up to me. Instead, I give him a wave of acknowledgment and turn to head inside.

In the library, I sit down before him, and as he walks up, rather than sitting down across from me, he stands beside the table and rummages through his bag for a moment. I feel myself fill with dread when he pulls out a thick packet and lays it down in front of me. I read the front page and recoil. _Review_.

Blink. Blink. . . Never ending 'No!'

"What is this?" I dare to ask, looking up at him with a cringe.

He pays no mind to my horror. "A review packet. You're going to take it home and finish it by the end of the week."

"What?" I shout. "Home? End of the week? I don't think." Shoving the packet away, I cross my arms in defiance.

Syaoran calmly reaches out and slides it in front of me again. "I beg to differ. It'll be good practice, and we both know you need it."

Sure, I know he's right- which is why I let my head fall onto the table. To follow it up, I let out a long groan, and a cross between a laugh and a sob. The laugh, because of pity. The sob, because this packet will be my downfall.

"You'll live." How can he be so heartless? And, more importantly, how the hell am I going to finish all of this by the end of the week?

* * *

As it turns out, Naoko is super smart. No surprise- she's always reading and writing, after all.

When I get to the library, I don't grab the book from the shelf. It seems to spike Naoko's interest, because she asks me about it. I end up telling her about my tutoring sessions with 'the jerk who sits behind me in class'. Yes, that's actually what I'm referring to him as now. She offers to help me out, so I agree, not wanting to pass up the opportunity. It's pretty sad that, even after two weeks of suffering, I still have to get her help with every other question. I only know how to do about half the problems on my own. On the bright side, though, that's half more than I knew before.

By the end of lunch, we've only finished the first two pages, out of about thirty. I realize that I'm going to have to do all the problems I know at home, and just get Naoko's help with the ones I absolutely _can't_ do on my own. Where exactly is sleep fitting into this schedule?

* * *

After the sun has gone down, and I'm finally home for the night, I go to my room and pull out the review packet. Looks like I'll have to start staying up late this week. I get through a fair number of pages, before my eyelids finally give in and I collapse onto my bed, too tired to continue.

The next day, I head to school rubbing my eyes and yawning. I have trouble riding my skates because my legs feel so heavy. I did a lot of back and forth yesterday at work- even more than usual. All those trips to the kitchen carrying heavy plates must be causing the extra tension.

By the time I reach the front gate outside of the school, my heart is pounding and my breaths are shallow. I take the same rout everyday, and never have this problem. Rather than thinking about it too hard, I close my eyes and wait for Syaoran to show up.

I don't become aware of Syaoran's presence until he's right in front of me. "Kinomoto? You there?" I reluctantly open my eyes to find Syaoran standing a few feet away from me, examining my face. The look he gives me reminds me of Tomoyo's face when she wakes up to find a blemish on her face; something that happens once in a blue moon with Tomoyo's skin being next to flawless. "Wow, you look awful!"

"Well, gee thanks." I want to move- but at the same time really, _really_ don't. Is there an option where I have my own, personal motor scooter to take me anywhere I need to go? If I were rich, I would buy myself a segway, that way I'd never have this problem again.

Syaoran quickly tries to correct himself. "Not like that- I just meant that you look really out of it." I give him a blank stare, and he shakes his head. "Never mind." Good, because I don't want to use any more brain power than needed right now.

I follow close behind as we approach the building. "So, have you started the packet yet?" The thought of the evil review packet makes me wide awake from the sudden wave of irritation.

"Yeah. Stayed up late working on the stupid thing."

He glances back at me, and I want to slap him when he says, "clearly."

You- if I weren't so exhausted right now, I'd make you regret that, Li. I glare daggers into his back the rest of the way to the library.

Throughout the lesson, I'm only half there. I try my best to listen to what Syaoran is saying, but the information only goes to my short term memory for a few seconds before vanishing as if he never said anything in the first place. I almost feel a little bad about it, but there's not much I can do about it, so I just sit in silence, pretending to be soaking up everything he's telling me.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

I'm not stupid. I can tell that Sakura zoned out the second I opened my mouth, but I decide not to say anything about it. It's not like me getting mad at her is going to make her any less tired.

Even though I wish I weren't, part of me is worried about her. Sakura has never known when she's pushed herself too far, and it's clear now that she has. I'd tell her to take it easy, but if she hears it from me, I know she'll either ignore it, or just go and do the exact opposite out of spite. So, in the end I keep my mouth shut and watch her stare blankly at the textbook between us.

I can't help feel a little relieved when the bell rings. Even during class, Sakura stares out the window, not hearing what Mr. Terada is saying. I can see Tomoyo giving her worried looks every so often, but keep my eyes trained on the blackboard.

It's not your problem, Syaoran. Sakura's health is none of your concern. I tell myself this, yet I'm not sure I believe it. Probably because I don't _want_ to believe it. Pretty sad- seven years later, and I'm still in denial.

* * *

Sakura and I reach the school building at the same time Wednesday morning. I'm not very surprised when I find her wearing normal shoes. With the pace she's going right now, I'd say she doesn't have the energy for them. Even so, it rattles me a little.

She spots me after a few seconds.

"Nice timing today," I comment. She doesn't reply. We walk towards the building side by side, with me throwing subtle side glances in Sakura's direction every once in a while.

During the lesson, I can tell that she is trying to concentrate. Her eyebrows knit together, and she stares at the paper with such intensity that I think she might burn a hole in it. In the end, though, her efforts are in vain. I give her a pop quiz right before the bell rings, and she jumbles up the information from today with the information from other units throughout the year. We aren't going to be anywhere _near_ ready for midterms at this rate.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I don't even realize that I've started to nod off until I feel someone nudge my shoulder. Terada-sensei is still at the front of the classroom, writing on the board as usual. I lazily turn my head to the side and find Tomoyo watching me. She mouths, 'is everything alright?' I nod weakly, then turn back to the front of the classroom.

At work, the evening seems to drag on forever. I move slowly, but try by best to keep up. I can see Chiharu giving me stressed, yet concerned looks whenever we pass each other in the kitchen.

On Thursday morning I wake up late, so I have to resort to grabbing a protein bar and running out the door. It's not the most ideal breakfast, but it's better than nothing. So much for balanced meals.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

She's late. The possibility that she might be staying home sick crosses my mind, but I realize less than a second later that's not something Sakura would ever do. Sometime around ten after, Sakura finally shows up. She comes running around the corner looking like she might topple over if she takes one more step. Slowing down first, she stops in front of me and bends down to put her hands on her knees. I can hear her erratic breathing, and wonder if it's from the running or the exhaustion. Probably a combination of both.

"You okay?"

She nods, and straightens herself again. "Yeah. Sorry I'm late."

"It's fine." I tilt my head to get a better view of her face. "Need a minute?"

She stands up, and starts walking ahead, still panting. "No, I'm good."

I watch disapprovingly, but keep my mouth shut.

When we sit down in the library, Sakura pulls out a rectangular object from her bag. She holds it up to show it to me and asks, "do you mind? I didn't have time for breakfast this morning." Of course; It's a protein bar.

Okay, at this point I think she's just _trying_ to make me worry. That, or make me feel guilty about giving her that stupid packet. Both of which she has already done very well.

We aren't supposed to eat in the library, but I nod. "Go ahead." I'm not a stickler for the rules, and even if I were, it's not as though I can just say no when she's so clearly getting sick.

She unwraps the protein bar and looks at it like she's just found water in a desert. When she takes the first bite, a smile stretches out and reaches the corners of her eyes. She seems to melt into her seat a little. It's actually pretty adorable. Damn it, Syaoran, stop thinking about that stuff!

To distract myself, I pull out some papers and get us started.

* * *

The bell rings, waking Sakura from a trance sort of state. She shoots her head up and looks around. Then, she grabs her things and stands up. It's like she's totally forgotten about me. I start to gather my things as I observe.

When she's on her feet, she suddenly stops short. Her hand rests on the table and she leans on it for support. Her eyes are directed at the table, but they aren't focused in on it. She blinks with rapid fire.

I watch her silently until she starts to come back to reality, then I speak. "Dizzy?"

She nods weakly, and slowly steps back from the table, removing her hand.

"Need to go see the nurse?" Any attempts I make are futile, but I decide to try anyways.

As predicted, she shakes her head. "I'll live." Well, that's not very reassuring.

I follow close behind her the entire way to class, being sure to watch for signs that would suggest she's about to fall over or pass out. Fortunately, we makes it to the classroom without an incident. Still, every time I see her stand up from her seat, she takes a moment to steady herself before walking. It leaves me feeling unsettled.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

At work, I can tell that Mrs. Matsumoto knows something's up. She approaches me during one of my breaks to talk to me.

"Sakura, are you feeling alright today? You're looking flushed and a little pale."

"Yeah," I lie. "I'm fine. Never been better!" I give her an enthusiastic thumbs up.

She eyes me suspiciously. "Alright, but if you need to take some time off, just say the word." I give her a reassuring nod with no intention of doing so.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

This is getting ridiculous. By Friday, I'm about ready to just take Sakura and drag her, kicking and screaming, to see Ms. Mizuki in the infirmary. She comes walking up red faced and breathing heavily. Thing is, she's even running today. If anything, she's walking _slower_ than usual. Why is she even at school?

"Are you here to tell me you're staying home sick today?" I shouldn't even bother asking, but I decide to give it a shot. Who know, maybe it'll plant the idea into her mind. Unfortunately, she just looks confused. So much for that idea. Sakura's too dense for something as elaborate as inception, anyways.

"No, why would I?"

Because you look like you just went to hell and back. I decide to go with a somewhat more subtle approach. "You aren't looking too good, Kinomoto." Okay, so it wasn't all that subtle, but what the hell, right? What's the worst that could happen at this point?

She'd probably look a lot more annoyed were she not about to keel over from fatigue. "I feel wonderful. Can we get started?" I breath out a low whistle, and smack my lips. Have it your way, Sakura.

"Well, alright, then. Off we go."

Inside the library, Sakura is practically nodding off. Finally, after what feels like forever- but is really only about ten minutes- I shut the textbook and set down the pencil in my hand.

Sakura looks up at me, puzzled. "What are you doing? We still have, like, forty minutes left."

"I'm not about to waste both of our time by sitting here, trying to teach you this again for the third time in a row, if you're not going to listen to me again."

"What?" She's turned hostile. "I _am_ listening!" Emerald eyes boar into me. _Tired_ emerald eyes.

"Clearly not, or you would have realized by now that I explained all of this to you on Wednesday, and then again yesterday."

Faint frown lines appear on her brow. "No, you didn't! Yesterday we talked about-" she stops short.

"See? You don't remember. You've been too tired these past few days to hear anything I've said." I lean back in my chair and watch as she fumbles for words.

"W-wha?" She is trying to compose herself, when she remembers something. "Well, I finished your stupid review packet, so... Ha!" She pulls out the thick stack of papers from her bag and tosses out onto the table. "Must be doing _something_ right." I just stare at the packet between us. I want to take the thing and shred it- or, better yet, burn it. Yeah, burning would be way more satisfactory.

Had I not given Sakura the packet, she might be in better shape. She might actually be able to stand up without nearly passing out. Damn it! I lean forward onto the table, and run my fingers through my hair.

"Look, Sakura, I didn't mean for you to-" I freeze. Wait a minute. Did I just-? I look up at the girl in front of me. I imagine that we have the same expression of horror and disbelief on our faces. She stares at me wide-eyed for a moment, but then her face twists into one of rage. Her already flushed face turns even redder.

"Don't _call_ me that!" At lightning speed, she grabs her eraser and pitches it at me. I shoot my hand out and catch it before it can hit me. The action only pisses her off even more. I calmly set the eraser down in front of her. She almost takes another shot at me, but I don't pull my hand away, so she doesn't try to get the tiny object from beneath my palm.

"_Kinomoto_." She raises her eyebrows in acknowledgment. "What I'm trying to say is that there's no use in me trying to teach you right now. You're way too tired, so just lay your head on the table and get some rest. I'll wake you up when the bell rings." I lean back in seat, pulling my hand away. Her eyes don't go to the eraser, though. Instead, she watches me suspiciously.

"I'm not tired," she insists.

"Sure you aren't."

"I'm not!" _Somebody _is in denial.

"Well, do it anyways. Either that, or just sit there the rest of the time while I look over the packet." I really don't want to have to look at it, but I _am_ the one who gave it to her, so I don't have much of a choice.

"I could leave, you know." Is that supposed to be some kind of threat?

"And go where?"

"I know a place."

"Just give it a rest already."

At first she glares at me, but I see her eyelids drift shut, and then they flutter a few times. With one final drifting shut of her lids, Sakura brings her arms up and _finally_ lays her head down.

I watch her do these things. It stirs something inside of me as I watch her. From the way her hair falls across her face, to the way her face looks as she sleeps, I find it beautiful. I find _her_ beautiful. But then, I guess that's not really saying much. I've always seen her as beautiful.

When the bell rings, I keep my promise and nudge her a few times to wake her up. Her head rises slowly. She has to blink a few times to really understand what's going on.

"What time is it?"

"Time to go. The bell just rang. Come on, lets go."

I stand and wait for her to gather her things. I earn a glance as she walks up to me. She rubs her eyes as we walk out of the library. I keep pace with her the entire time, which she doesn't seem to mind too much. Part of me can't help but wonder if she would avoid walking side by side if she had more energy. I don't think I really want to know the answer, though.

* * *

It's after school, and I'm just about to leave the building, when someone calls out to me.

"Li!"

I turn around to find Chiharu walking towards me. "Mind if I walk with you for a minute?"

This is unusual. Chiharu and I don't typically interact much outside of lunch, unless Takashi is around.

Wondering what she wants, I nod, and hold the door open for her.

"So, what's on your mind?"

She anxiously glances over at me. "Remember the other day how you were saying that I should rekindle my friendship with Sakura?"

Ah, here we go again. Why does it feel like all my conversations as of late are surrounding Sakura? Probably because they are.

"I didn't mean that you _should_, necessarily; I was merely pointing out that you could if you wanted to. It would sure make things a lot easier. Especially for Daidouji."

"Tomoyo? How do you figure?"

"Come on, Mihara. Daidouji is close friends with both you _and_ Sakura. She has to choose between the two of you sometimes. Lunch, for example. Usually she eats with Sakura, because Sakura doesn't really have anyone else to eat with. She's been sitting with you this past week because she's worried about you. In turn, she has to leave behind Sakura." I wonder if I should've left out the last part.

Chiharu's eyes drift to the pavement beneath our feet. "Yeah, I guess so." We pause just outside of the school gate. She looks up at me again. "Well, thanks, Li. I'll-" She stops short, catching sight of something over my shoulder. I follow her gaze behind me and my eyes zero in on none other than Sakura Kinomoto herself.

Chiharu and I watch as she 'walks' slowly down the sidewalk. I say 'walks' because what she's actually doing is more like trudging. Her feet barely come off the ground, and it looks like she's about to fall over. She's using the wall to support herself, for crying out loud!

"Is she alright?"

"No," I say. "She most certainly is not." With that, I finally snap. "Kinomoto!" I march angrily up to her, and stand in front of her, effectively cutting her off. Her head looks up robotically. Oddly enough, as her head comes up, her eyelids go down. As well as the rest of her.

"Shit!" I reach out and grab her before she can fall.

"Sakura!" Chiharu runs up to us.

I lower us to the ground, and holding Sakura in one arm, I use the other to pull out my cell phone.

"Are you going to call an ambulance?"

"No, I have an alternative." Just then Wei picks up. "Hey, Wei, I'm going to need you to bring the car around to the school. And can you call the family doctor while you're at it? Thanks." I don't wait for his reply before hanging up.

Chiharu reaches out and puts her hand to Sakura's forehead. "She's burning up." It doesn't shock me hearing this. Sakura's entire face is flushed, and her breaths are uneven.

Chiharu looks up at me. "What do we do? Is she going to be okay?"

"She's going to be fine." I say it party to myself, as well. "I'll take her back to my place and have the family doctor check her out." I can see Chiharu trembling, but don't say anything about it. "You two work together, right?" She nods. "In the mean time, can you tell the manager that Sakura won't be coming in today?" I earn another nod.

"Should I call her house to let Touya know where she is?" The name of Sakura's brother makes me pause.

"No. I'll call." That'll be an interesting conversation. He didn't like me when Sakura and I were _friends_, so I don't even want to know how he feels about me now. Still, I can't ask Chiharu to call; Not when Sakura will me with me.

I look down at Sakura's unconscious figure. Why did you have to get sick?

Other students leaving the building look over at us and pause. Not wanting to start a scene, I pick up Sakura and say to Chiharu, "we should head probably go somewhere a little more discrete." Chiharu looks over her shoulder and nods.

Together we walk across the street. Chiharu sits down on one of the benches under a tree, and pats her lap. "I'll support her head." I lay Sakura down so that her head rests on Chiharu's lap.

While we wait, Chiharu and I watch Sakura. Her mouth is open in a little 'o' as she breaths heavily, her chest rising and falling. If not for Chiharu sitting there watching, I might have accidentally reached out and taken Sakura's hand.

I'm a little shaken when Chiharu speaks. "It's kinda funny, don't you think?" My eyes move from Sakura to the girl leaning over her.

"What is?" I don't see how this is _funny_. Sakura just collapsed in front of us on our way out of the building. Quite the opposite of funny, in my opinion.

"That it's the two of us who found her." She looks up and elaborates. "We were two of her closest friends at one point. It just seems ironic that we're the ones here right now." Oh.

"Yeah," I say slowly. "It is, isn't it?" The more I think about it, the odder it seems.

Right then, I hear a car door open behind me. "Syaoran-sama." I turn around. Wei stands there assessing the situation. How had I not noticed him pull up?

"Just a moment." I turn around again. Chiharu lifts Sakura's shoulders up so I can slip my arm under, and then, bringing my other arm under her knees, I lift Sakura up once more. Chiharu supports her head so that it doesn't fall back.

"Call me when you hear from the doctor, okay?" Chiharu looks at me with pleading eyes.

"Of course. I'll talk to you later than." She nods, and slowly lowers Sakura's head. It falls lifelessly back, making my heart squeeze. Chiharu takes a step back and watches as I take Sakura and step into the car. It's not until we turn the corner that I look back and see her begin to walk away.

* * *

**Another thing: I'll probably go back as I write this story and take down/put up different authors notes in the chapters.**

**By the way, next week I'm going to include a flashback of what happened to Sakura and Syaoran 7 years ago. That's a little something to look forward to. And Sakura at Syaoran's house; I've been having fun writing that.**


	8. A Night at Syaoran's

**Finally finished it! I'm so excited for all of you to read this! No more talking, just read.**

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

While waiting for the family doctor to finish his examination of Sakura, I pace the living room. Sakura is currently laying on the couch in the middle of the room. After what feels like forever the doctor finally stands up and turns to me.

"It looks like she just overworked herself. She has a fever, but put a damp towel on her forehead and it should go down. Most importantly, she needs to rest," he informs me.

"Alright. Thank you." Wei sees the man out, while I head to the kitchen to put some ice in a bowl. I fill the bowl with water before heading back into the living room and setting it down on the table in front of the couch. As I go to fetch a washcloth, I wonder what Sakura would be saying if she were awake. Probably some nonsense about being perfectly fine.

Washcloth in hand, I reenter the living room. I get the cloth damp and turn to Sakura. Her face is strained as I reach out and brush her bangs from her forehead. Carefully laying the cloth down, I find myself staring at her.

When awake, Sakura is always trying to either pick a fight with me or avoid me. I haven't been able to look at her like this since we were children. She would've pushed me away by now if she were awake.

I want to sit and stare at her for a while longer, but pull myself up and head to the kitchen. Time to call the infamous Touya Kinomoto.

* * *

Nobody answers the phone when I call the Kinomoto household, so I leave a message. Oddly enough, over five hours later, at ten o'clock, there's still no call back. I'm starting to get a little worried. I don't really want to have Sakura here all night- not because I don't want to have to watch over her, but if she wakes up when I'm not in the room, she'll probably freak out. Come to think of it, even if I _am_ in the room she'll probably still freak out.

After a quick phone call with Chiharu, I decide to wait in the living room for a while, and if Sakura doesn't wake up, I'll just pull out the futon and sleep on the floor. Wei already went to bed, so I turned out most of the lights. The living room lights are off, leaving the only source of light to be what's leaking into the room from the kitchen.

Eventually I get bored just sitting there, so I get up and grab a book to read until I can't stay awake any longer. I make sure to flick on the lamp in the corner of the room so that I don't kill my eyesight trying read in the dark. Cracking the book open, I sit down in front of the couch near Sakura's feet and lean back. It's a little awkward reading knowing that there's an unconscious girl behind me, but I try not to think too much about that.

I don't know how long I've reading when my eyelids start to get heavy. After setting the book down on the table, I go to fetch the futon and two blankets. On my way back into the room I turn off the lamp. I walk over to Sakura with one of the blankets and lay it over her sleeping form. She seems to be having a nightmare, because she's making these little whimpers every so often. Almost makes me want to wake her up, but I fight back the urge.

I set the futon down perpendicular to the sofa and lay down so that my head is close to the table. This way I just have to open my eyes, look down, and I've got a good view of Sakura.

Sleep, sleep, sleep. Damn it! I can't fall asleep if she keeps on making noise. Every time I hear her, I find my eyes opening to look at her. I don't know why, though; She's not doing anything. Well, she's starting to shift uncomfortably, but other than that nothing. I wonder if she's about to wake up.

Finally giving up on sleep, I sit up and glare at her. There's no reason for it- it's not like I'm mad at her or anything. Then I see her lips move. Does she talk in her sleep? I lean in closer and strain to her what she's saying. At first all I hear is little _sh _sound, but then I start to make out something else. A single word- only it's not a word. It's a name. _My_ name.

"Syaoran." It comes out on a wispy exhale.

I feel my heart skip a beat. Am I dreaming? Did I fall asleep on the futon without even realizing it? But, then why is the dream so incredibly vivid. All of my senses kick in on high power. I can see every crease in Sakura's smooth skin as she frowns; Hear every inhale and exhale of breath that passes her soft pink lips; Smell the scent of intoxicatingly sweet shampoo from her honey brown locks; Feel the warmth of my cheeks and the pounding against my chest; Taste the last bits of saliva as my mouth dries up. Nope. Definitely not dreaming.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Ugh. I feel like crap. What the heck happened to me? I open my eyes. Why is it so dark? I blink a few times. Where am I? I push myself up. On a coach, apparently. This doesn't look like the couch in my house, though. There's a blanket over me, which I pull off, and I swing my legs over the edge. As I stand, something falls from my forehead, but I don't bother trying bending down to retrieve. Even though there aren't any lights on, I can tell I'm not at my house.

Half-asleep, I turn and take a few steps forward, only to have my foot catch on something and I go tumbling to the ground. My body hits the cold hardwood floor with a loud _thud_.

"What the hell?" A groggy and startled voice comes from behind me, and something under my legs jerks up.

I accidentally squeak. "Who's there?" There's a shadowy figure sitting to my left on the ground. I try to make out the face, but my eyes are still too tired.

I hear a groan. "Geez, Kinomoto! What the hell is the matter with you?" Huh? That voice... It can't be. Don't tell me- "Calm down, it's me; Syaoran." How am I supposed to calm down knowing that? I watch Syaoran's outline fall back onto the floor, letting out a sigh.

"Li? What are you doing here?" I pull my legs off of his and crawl up next to him.

"This is _my_ apartment."

"What," I scream. "Then why am _I_ here?"

My eyes are starting to get used to being awake and in the dark, so I can see when Syaoran turns his head to look at me. "Don't you remember?" Remember? My heart pounds against my chest.

"Remember what?" Did I do something? Did _he_ do something? Okay, Syaoran wouldn't do anything, but what the hell is going on?

He pushes himself up again, this time standing up all the way. "Hold on a minute." He crosses the room and I can't tell what he's doing until there's a clicking sound, and at the same time a bright light fills the room. I wince away, covering my eyes.

"Warning next time, please." By the time I'm able to look up again, he's gone. "Um, Li?" No response. "Li," I call out louder this time. Silence. I'm about to call out again when he suddenly reappears carrying a glass of ice water.

He crosses the room to me, and hands me the glass. I have so many questions, like why I woke up on a couch in Syaoran's apartment with Syaoran himself laying on the floor next to me, yet here he is just handing me a glass of water. He's way too calm.

I look at the water in his hand and back up to him. "It's not poisoned. I promise." That thought hadn't even crossed my mind.

I reach out and take the water from his hand, muttering a soft, "thanks."

"You're welcome."

I avoid eye contact while sipping from the glass. Out of the corner of my eye I make note of what he's wearing. Green t-shirt and black exercise shorts. I never see him out of his school uniform, so I the sight of him in casual cloths makes my heart race. Now red, I basically chug the icy water in attempt to cool my face down.

I hear Syaoran's footsteps moving away from me, and when I look again he's sitting on the couch watching me. The way he looks at me nearly makes me choke. Why is he looking at me like that? I shift uncomfortably under his intense stare.

"You going to tell me what happened?" Thankfully, the question makes him break his stare.

"Right. So, yesterday afternoon you passed out in front of the school."

"Yester-" Okay, now I'm actually choking. I lean forward, coughing violently into my arm. Before I even see him move, Syaoran is kneeling next to me, taking the glass and putting a hand on my back.

When my coughs have subsided, he asks, "you good?" to which I simply nod. "It's a little past midnight right now, so technically it's Saturday." Midnight? Feeling light headed, and way too close to the amber eyed boy next to me, I push myself onto the couch, and hug the pillow I was sleeping on to my stomach as I draw up my legs. Syaoran, too, moves back to the couch, but he sits on the opposite side.

"Anyways, I was right in front of you at the time, so I called Wei to get the car, and brought you back here. I also had the family doctor look at you." He leans forward and sets the glass down between us on the table.

"Doctor? Look at me?" I pull the pillow tighter against my body. "What do you mean?"

Seeing my reaction, Syaoran quickly brings his hands up to tell me I'm wrong. "Not like that!" He seems alarmed that I would even think something like it, but I was unconscious. "He checked your temperature and pulse, and stuff like that. I assure you, you were fully clothed the entire time."

"Oh," I say, relieved and a little embarrassed for suggesting otherwise. I feel myself relax, and Syaoran lowers his hands. "I guess all that makes sense, but I still don't understand why I just woke up in your apartment in the middle of the night. And were you sleeping on the futon?" Seriously, I wanna know why he was sleeping on the floor.

"I thought I just explained that." He yawns, and rests his arm against the back of the couch, using it to support his head. "I called your house, but nobody picked up. Then I left a message, and never heard back." His voice is still drowsy.

The way he's just sitting there with his head tilted sideways, leaning casually against the couch, makes me even more on edge. It's like we're close friends and the situation is totally normal. Which it's not. I woke up in a guy's apartment, and don't remember how I got here. Need I say more? I'm freaking out!

Maybe I'm just imagining all of this- although why I would imagine something this messed up is beyond me. At least it's Syaoran that found me. Better him than some random stranger who might- I don't wanna think about that! As much as I rag on him, Syaoran is a trustworthy person. Reliable- not so much- but trustworthy? Yeah, I know it contradicts itself, seeing how they basically mean the same thing, but- believe me- Syaoran can't be relied on as far as being there for a friend goes.

The sound of Syaoran's voice pulls me back to reality.

"As for why I was sleeping on the floor," he begins. Oh, this part I gotta hear. "I was going to sleep in my room, but then it occurred to me that you might wake up during the night- which you did- and then start freaking out." Still freaking out. "I slept here so than if you woke up you'd see me and hopefully not start screaming. Or at the very least you wouldn't think you'd been abducted or something like that. I just didn't want you doing anything reckless."

"What exactly did you think I would do? Go into your kitchen and pull out a knife?"

He shrugs. "Never know with you. One minute you'll be yelling and throwing things-" okay, that was _once_\- "and the next, you'll be calmly sleeping as though nothing ever happened."

"You had that coming."

"I called you by your name, not something offensive or rude."

"I thought you figured out a long time ago not to call me by my given name."

"Yeah, I did. Were you not paying attention all those times I called you Kinomoto?"

"Ugh, never mind. We shouldn't even be talking about this." I told myself I wasn't going to bring up the past with him, but here I am doing it again.

He rolls his eyes. "Of course. You just don't want to have to talk about what happened."

"It's history now, there's nothing to talk about."

Syaoran shakes his head. "You're wrong about that, but now's not the time. I'm way too tired to argue with you right now. Being woken up in the middle of the night to someone tripping over me has left me rather drained."

Syaoran stands up and walks back to the futon.

"You should go back to sleep, too. You're still sick," he says, pulling back the blanket on the futon, and sitting down. "Leave the lamp on or turn it off, up to you."

"You're still going to sleep there? I know where I am now; You can go to your room, you know."

"I know, I'm just not sure how comfortable I am with leaving you here unsupervised."

He speaks from his position under the blanket, where he lays with his back turned to me.

I simply grumble and get up to turn off the light, stepping over him on my way. When I figure out where the switch is, I flip it and the room becomes dark again. I use the light from down the hall to find my way back to the sofa. Even with the light, I still have to feel in front of me with my foot to avoid stepping on Syaoran. When my foot comes in contact with the futon, I carefully step over it, being sure to feel where I'm winding up.

"Couldn't you have picked a better spot to lay?"

I can barely hear him grumble something under his breath. Clearly he's too out of it to for a proper response.

I just roll my eyes and lay back down on the sofa, pulling the blanket over me in the process. Even though I close my eyes and try to fall asleep, I can't. It's stressful knowing that there's an attractive guy sleeping on the floor a few feet away from me. Be he someone I know well or not, it doesn't matter. Looks like I might be laying here awake for a little while.

* * *

**Touya's POV**

"Sakura!" Where is that little monster?

I just got back from Yuki's grandparent's house. They needed help moving some old furniture, and I ended up crashing there for the night. Now I've gotta find the little monster before she heads out for work.

Passing by the land line, I see it blinking out of the corner of my eye. I reach out and press the button to play the message. Who knows, maybe Sakura called and left a message.

"Hi, this is Li Syaoran," a male voice says from the other end. Immediately I go tense. Li Syaoran? That name is way too familiar for my liking. It's the name of that brat who used to be my Sakura's friend before he abandoned her. I glare at the receiver as the voice, 'Syaoran', continues speaking. "I'm calling to let you know that Sakura is here with me at my apartment right now."

"What," I scream, grabbing the whole base, and pulling it to my face, glaring at it.

"She collapsed on the way out of school, so I brought her back to my apartment. She's sleeping right now. When you get this, call me. Thanks."

The recording comes to an end, and I basically toss the object in my hands back onto the counter so that I can pace across the room.

Collapsed? Damn it, Sakura, how many times have I told you not to overwork yourself?

Hold up. That was from yesterday. Sakura's still not back... What the hell did that brat do to my little sister?

I waste no time before grabbing the phone and dialing the number on the answering machine. The beeps pass by all too slowly.

Finally, after a few rings, someone picks up.

"This is the Li residence." The voice is raspy and deep. Too old to be the brat.

"This is Touya Kinomoto, Sakura Kinomoto's brother. I received a message saying that she's there." I keep myself polite. As I recall, the brat is pretty rich. I must be talking to the butler. Even though I'm pissed as hell, I decide to leave the poor old man alone. He probably suffers enough at the hands of that brat.

"Yes, please wait a moment."

I stand, tapping my foot impatiently, while there's silence on the other end.

After a minute, someone speaks on the other end. About time, too.

"Li Syaoran speaking." The voice from the answering machine reaches my ears.

"You brat!" I allow my polite facade to crumble. "What the hell have you done with my sister?" No more Mr. Nice-guy.

"Sakura's here, but she's sleeping." He remains calm, which just pisses me off even more.

"That message was from yesterday!"

"She slept all through yesterday, and woke up just after midnight, only to fall back asleep soon after. Right now she's sleeping on my couch. I didn't think it would be smart to send her home if nobody was there, especially since she still has a slight fever."

"Well I'm here now, so where the hell is she?"

"If you want, I can get the car to drop her off."

"No!" That would mean he'd have to get her into the car, too. No way do I want him putting his hands on my sister. "I'll come get her. Give me the address."

There's a pause before the brat agrees and gives me the address.

"You better not try anything funny before I get there, Li." I hang up the phone, and immediately race out the door.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Eggs. I smell eggs. Even in my half asleep state, I'm still vaguely aware of what it is. My nose involuntarily twitches. Ah, that smells good.

In a trance, I feel my legs carrying me towards the smell. Even as my eyes peek open to see where my feet are stepping, I'm still not entirely sure what's going on. Why am I moving? I don't know, but I do know that I have to find the source of that smell. Then I have to devour it. The thought of eating makes my mouth water. When did I get so hungry?

Finally, after shuffling down a hallway, and entering the room where the smell is coming from, I lazily lift my head to find myself in the kitchen. In front of me, standing in by the stove with a frying pan in one hand, and a spatula in the other, is Syaoran Li. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I remember the events of earlier this morning.

"Are you feeling any better?" He doesn't even turn.

"How did you-" I stop when he glances over his shoulder and gives me a look that tells me I should already know the answer; Which I do. Well, I kind of know, I guess. I assume it's from marital arts training, but I'm not sure exactly _how_ he does it. Not that it really matters.

Dropping the topic, I walk up to him and peer into the pan. My eyes light up. "Is that..."

"Yep," he says, flipping over the contents of the pan. "I hope you still like omelets, because we're fresh out of pancake batter." With the flick of the wrist, the stove shuts off.

"Just a bit," I confess. It's a totally understatement. Omelets are one of my favorite foods, second only to pancakes. Damn you, Syaoran, for knowing my weakness! Then again... I am going to get to eat it, right?

"So, I just got a call from your brother."

I'm not really listening to him right now. I watch, practically drooling, while he dishes out the omelet onto a plate.

"Did you?"

He sets the pan into the sink, and walks to the dining room, plate in hand. I trail closely behind him.

"Yeah, he's going to stop by and pick you up soon."

"You don't say." The plate is on the table now.

"Are you even listening to me?" I force my gaze up to his face.

"Huh?"

He shakes his head. "No, of course not." How does he expect me to listen to him when I'm starving, and my second favorite food is sitting on the table in front of me? His expectations are way too high.

I know he's given up when he sighs in defeat, and pulls out the chair from the table. "Go ahead and dig in."

Don't need to tell me twice. I'm in the chair, holding utensils in a flash. The food is in my mouth in a matter of seconds.

Wow, I totally forgot how good of a cook Syaoran was- or I suppose _is_. This omelet is mouth watering! I can't help but smile like a little kid while I eat it.

Syaoran leaves the room for a moment and returns with a glass of water which he sets down in front of me. He then proceeds to take a seat diagonal from me at the head of the table. I begin to feel self conscious when he lays his head in the palm of his hand and watches me. The pace at which I eat slows down, and I spend an excruciatingly long amount of time just cutting the food. At first I keep my eyes trained downwards at the cooked-to-perfection omelet, and then I finally give up and face Syaoran head on.

"Do you mind? I'm trying to eat."

He doesn't look away, but says, "you weren't listening when I told you earlier, but your brother is stopping by to pick you up."

I nearly choke, something that has been happening to me far too frequently since I got here. "What? When?"

"I got off the phone with him around ten minutes ago, so he should be here any time now. Might want to eat that a little faster if you want to finish it in time." He nods to the plate of food in front of me.

I waste no time replying. Syaoran's cooking is way too good to let go to waste. His cooking skills are on par with my dad's. The two best cooks I know, and I've been deprived of both's food for the past seven years of my life. Only reason I'd want to be Syaoran's friend again: I'd get to eat the food he makes.

Hold up. He's still watching me! "Could you look somewhere else, please?" Yeah, that's not really a question. "I'm eating, and you're just sitting there staring at me like a total creep."

He must not have realized he it himself, because he abruptly pulls his face from its relaxed position in his hand. Blinking a few times, he averts his gaze.

"Better," I mumble before taking another bite.

As I munch on the rest of the omelet, Syaoran reaches into his pant pocket and pulls out a sleek black cell phone. I can't help envy him a little as he flips it open and starts making small clicking sounds as he types. Stupid rich people phones. Mine is this old, dull gray phone that used to be Touya's. The only reason I even _have_ a phone is because Touya doesn't want me wandering the streets at night on my way home from work with no way of calling for help if- heaven forbid- I need to.

I angrily stab my fork into the omelet, glad to be using western utensils rather than chopsticks. Can't stab something very effectively with chopsticks.

Syaoran's eyes rise with at clinking of the metal. He watches suspiciously while I just chomp down on the soft eggs in my mouth. After a few seconds, he looks back down at his phone and finishes typing, then flips the phone shut. Shoving it back into his pocket, he rises from his seat.

"You done with that?"

When I look down at the plate, I'm surprised to find it empty. Wow. I ate it all without even realizing. With a disappointed nod, Syaoran lifts the plate and exits the room.

I follow behind him and while he sets the plate into the sink, I can't help but ask, "do you live here alone?"

"No. Wei still lives here, but he's usually out."

Wei? In my mind, I picture the old man gray haired man with his wire glasses that have a chain hanging from them, similar to a monocle.

"Where is he?"

Syaoran turns around and leans against the counter. "He left while you were still asleep to pick up some things from the market."

"Oh." I nod and shuffle sideways towards the doorway leading out of the kitchen.

Seeing this, Syaoran looks amused. "What are doing?"

Trying to leave before this gets awkward; What else?

I'm still trying to think of something to say when a loud banging echos through the once quiet apartment. It makes me jump a bit, and I hold a hand to my racing heart.

"What the hell?" I choke out. "What was that?" Multiple loud bangs follow.

"Your brother, I assume." Syaoran pushes himself away from the counter and walks past me out of the kitchen. I follow closely behind him.

This time when there's a pause I can hear shouting from the other side of the door. "Open up the door, you brat!" Touya's voice is so loud that I worry he's going to wake up the whole entire building.

Thankfully, Syaoran reaches the door and swings it open before Touya can make any more racket.

On the other side, standing with his fist poised to start knocking again, is my loud-mouth brother. Touya stops and glares at Syaoran, who glares back as if to challenge him. Don't encourage him, Syaoran!

"Li, where the hell is my little sister?" he demands. Meanwhile, I'm standing a few feet behind Syaoran. How can he possibly not notice me?

"I'm literally standing _right_ here." He looks at me and Syaoran steps out of the way before Touya can shove him aside. Touya walks up to me and grabs my upper arm.

"Damn it, Sakura; What is this I hear about you collapsing? I've told you a million times not to push yourself." He brings his hand up and feels my forehead.

"I'm fine, Touya."

"She's still got a slight fever." Looking past my overly concerned brother, I can see Syaoran watching us.

Touya ignores him. "Clearly you aren't fine, or else we wouldn't be here. Speaking of which, how the hell did you end up with _him_ of all people?" Touya gestures to where Syaoran stands watching us by the door.

"What's that supposed to mean, 'him of all people'?" Touya glares over his shoulder at Syaoran.

"You know damn well what it means. I don't want you anywhere near my sister; You got that, Li?"

Syaoran is about to retaliate, but I cut in. "Knock it off, you two!" I say it in as firm of a voice as I can manage.

Neither one speaks for a moment, then Touya makes a _tsk_ sound. "Come on, Sakura, we're leaving." He pulls me past Syaoran to the other side of the doorway.

"Wait!" I shove my heels into the ground. "I have to get my bag."

Touya looks at me for a moment, then lets go and crosses his arms. "Make it quick."

I nod, before turning and running back to the apartment. Syaoran looks surprised when I slip through the door he's about to close.

"My bag," I state, running back into the living room and picking up my brown school bag from the coffee table.

On my way back out, I pause in front of Syaoran, who is holding the door open for me. He raises his eyebrows and waits for me to speak. My mouth opens. "Um-" Syaoran watches at me intently. I struggle to get the words out. "Thanks," I manage. "For everything."

A warm smile spreads across Syaoran's face, and I feel my heart race. "Anytime, Kinomoto."

I don't know want to try interpreting his words, so I rush through the door and follow my brother the rest of the way home with him lecturing me. Still, in the back of my mind, I can hear a tiny voice asking, _what does he mean by that?_

During the night I'm plagued by memories of the past.

* * *

My feet pound against the tile floor of the airport as fast as my heart, while I try to reach security before it's too late.

The security area comes into view and my eyes easily find their target. They first land on the tall gray haired man in a suit, and then flick down to the young boy by his side.

"Syaoran," I cry out. The boy turns and his eyes go wide as platters.

"Sakura?"

I slam into him full force and we both go tumbling onto the ground, me on top of him.

"You idiot!" I pound weakly against his chest. Tears threaten to spill from the corners of my eyes. "How could you? You were just going to leave without saying so much as goodbye? I thought we were friends."

He grabs my wrists. "Sakura, calm down." He pushes himself up until we're in a sitting position and takes my shoulders. "We _are_ friends." He says, looking at me dead on.

I blink hard, causing tears to stream down my face. My shoulders shake under his firm grasp. "If that's true then why didn't you tell me? I could've handled it, you know!"

Syaoran close his eyes like he's in pain and says, "I know, Sakura, but I didn't think I could."

"What do you mean?" My voice trembles.

His amber eyes open and he stares at me for a moment. Finally he wraps his arms around me and says, "I didn't want to see you like this. I'm sorry, Sakura."

I grab onto the front of his shirt. "Do you have to go?"

"Yes." That one word alone breaks my heart.

"But you can't just leave. What am I going to do without you here?"

He stiffens. "Sakura." His voice is soft. "You still have Daidouji and Mihara, and Touya, he's always looking out for you; Your father, too!" He pulls away. "It's not like we'll never see each other again. You can always call me or send me an email anytime." He gives me a reassuring smile, but it's clearly forced.

"Syaoran-sama," calls a deep voice from beside us. Syaoran looks up, but I stay still. My eyes are on Syaoran's face as he says something. I faintly hear a response, but it doesn't register.

A second later Syaoran is pushing himself off the ground. I look up at him, my eyes glazed over.

Then he reaches out to offer me his hand. I stare at it. So many emotions flow through me, but only one thought. Soon this hand won't be here. Syaoran has always been like my rock, my anchor, the one I turn to when I feel like I can't do it anymore. Now he's leaving me, and I can't bring myself to take his hand.

When I don't move to take his hand, but stare up at him with tears running down my face, and my mouth turned down, I can see the regret. His look of reassurance falters.

"Sakura," he whispers. Sighing, he kneels down and looks at me with tired eyes. "Please, don't make this any more difficult than it already is for me."

I recoil. Don't make it any more difficult for _him_? Rage adulterates the once pure sorrow in my heart. I feel so lied to. So _betrayed_.

My face heats up from my anger, and when he tries to reach out again, I swat his hand away. I rise to my feet and glare down at him.

"Fine then," I shout hysterically. "I'm sorry for caring too much. I didn't mean to make this _difficult_ for you."

He blinks, and then stands, saying, "I didn't mean it like-"

"No, of course you didn't." Venom drips from my voice. I can tell my words are cutting into him like razor blades, but shut out any emotions I feel even remotely close to pity.

"Sakura," he pleads, stepping forward and trying to take my hands. I leap back, and hold my hands to my chest as if his touch has burnt me. I can see I'm hurting him. I can see the pain in his eyes as I pull away, but I choose to ignore it.

I take a deep breath to control myself, and say in as calm a voice as I can manage, "I'm sorry. That was out of line." I turn to the old man who has been beside us the entire time. I bow. "Wei."

He nods. "Ms. Kinomoto."

I stand. "Please excuse my behavior. I hope I haven't caused too much trouble."

He looks at me sympathetically. "Not at all, young miss."

I turn back to Syaoran and bow. Standing up I look him strait in the eyes. "Have a safe flight." Then I turn and walk away. Even when I hear Syaoran calling my name, I don't turn back. I'm not sure I _can_.

* * *

When I wake up, I turn in bed and reach up to the ledge where my alarm clock sits. My hand wraps itself around something soft and plush. I pull it down. The stuffed animal falls onto the bed, and I press it against my chest. I clutch the precious handmade teddy bear to my chest in attempt to fill the empty void in my heart. Then I tilt my head down, and sob into its green fur.

"Syaoran." My lips tingle as they graze the tips of its fur.

Why did this have to happen to us? Why did everything have to get so messed up?

I hear my own soft whimpers, and bite my bottom lip to stop myself from making too much noise. I sniffle and press my face into my pillow to catch my tears and muffle the sobs echoing through me.

Forbidden thoughts enter my mind. Memories of the times we played and laughed together. Then memories of the times I cried in his arms. Memories of all the joy, along with the pain. All that we were. All that we could have been. All we could _be_.

_No_.

I'm getting too close. I can't allow myself to revert back. I can't lose control. I won't. There's no way I can allow him back into my heart.

There's only problem.

He never left.

* * *

**So? So? So? This is my personal favorite chapter so far. Loved writing it. Hope you all loved reading it, too.**

**By the way, I'm going to be going more in depth about the details of what happened after Syaoran left a little later. Maybe next chapter, maybe not until the one after that. I don't know. We'll see.**

**Thanks for reading! See you all next week.**


	9. The Painting of Truth

**Chapter 9 is here.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I can't do it. It's been forty-eight hours since I last saw him, and I still can't bring myself to face him.

Monday morning, I race to Tomoeda High with a whole new desire. I have to paint. I know it won't fill the void, but it'll at least help.

As soon as I pass though the threshold into the art room, I get to work. Grabbing a new sheet of thick painting paper, I sit down in front of the easel.

I don't know exactly what I'm doing, but I know the feelings stirring inside me. That alone is enough to get me started. The next hour is spent painting. When the bell rings, I put everything away and wander off to class.

He's there when I enter the room. I don't look at him as I pass by, but I can feel his eyes on me. I'm all too aware of his presence behind me.

"You missed tutoring today," he says from behind me.

I nod.

"Are you still recuperating?"

I nod again.

"Do you think you'll be there tomorrow?"

Biting my lip, I look down at my desk. "Maybe."

I'm thankful when he doesn't speak again.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

Something's not right. As I speak to Sakura, she's totally stiff. She hardly speaks, and she won't even look at me. Usually I'd think, 'okay, so she's ignoring me', but something about her is different. The way she gives me cautious replies, it's clear she's not simply ignoring me. She's got her guard up. More than just that, she's shutting me out the same way she did seven years ago. But why? Why is she shutting me out when she never let me back in to begin with?

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I return to work for the first time tonight. When I get there, Mrs. Matsumoto sits me down for a 'chat'.

As I enter, I catch sight of Chiharu standing in the corner watching us on her way to the kitchen. Her eyes are filled with a blend of curiosity and concern. Was she worried about me?

Mrs. Matsumoto sits down in the seat across from me and at the same time, Chiharu exits the room.

"I heard you collapsed on your way out of school the other day."

"I did, but who told you?" To confirm my suspicion, she moves her eyes down and to the side, as if listening for someone behind her. "Chiharu," I say to myself.

"She informed me that she was there when it happened." Well this is news to me. Syaoran never mentioned anything about Chiharu being there. "Apparently it was from exhaustion." Ah, here we go.

"Yeah, it was, but-"

She raises her hand. "Sakura, if there's one thing I've learned over the past two years of working with you, it's that you don't know when your body has had enough. I think it's pretty obvious what's going to have to happen now."

I hang my head. "Yeah, I know."

"Your brother's job just started today, so there shouldn't be any problems, am I right?"

"If everything goes as planed." It already has. Touya left early this morning to meet his coworkers and get his I.D.

"Good, now off to work."

* * *

Nope. Still can't do it. At this rate I'm going to fail all my exams because I'm too emotionally unstable to meet with my tutor.

Damn it. Damn it. Screw this! Who the hell cares, anyway? It's not like graduating is going to do me any good. How many jobs want someone with a high school degree, but not a college one? Not very many. I'll probably end up being a waitress for the rest of my life.

We can't afford to send me to college, and with my grades, there's no way I'll ever get a scholarship anywhere. What good does it do for me to study? None. Zero, zip, zilch. Why not thrown in the towel now, then? Oh, that's right, because Touya won't let me. Where the hell is my life going? At this rate, I'd probably be doing myself a favor by trying to seduce some rich old man and marrying my way through life.

To think that the richest person I've ever known is the very reason I'm having this problem. Ironic how that works. Almost makes me want to laugh. Actually, no, it really doesn't. If anything, it just pisses me off even more.

I would never let that happen to me, though. I have way too much dignity to allow myself to become like those women who marry just to get to someone's money. It's like a small step up from prostitution. Only difference is that if the guy croaks, the wife has got a hell of a lot to gain. Sickening, really.

Still, I've gotta make a living _somehow_. To do that, maintain all self-pronounced morals, and not break any laws, will lead me down a very hard path in life. I'll start graying before I've even reached my mid twenties.

I'm jerked back to reality when I turn the corner and barely have time to register Syaoran standing there before it's too late.

Crap! Why the hell am I hiding? This guy requires _way_ too much effort. Avoiding him is proving to be a lot more difficult than I initially anticipated. I mean, here I am with my arms wrapped around a tree, peeking around the trunk to spy on him. I'm taking the phrase 'tree hugger' to a whole new level.

Syaoran stands patiently at the front gate, phone in hand, looking like he doesn't have a care in the world. When he looks up, I press my back against the tree trunk, and hold my breath. A good, solid minute passes before I dare to look again. This time he's gone.

With a sigh, I glide out of my hiding spot, and cautiously make my way towards the school building. I'm sure to check for any signs of Syaoran on my way. Thankfully, he's nowhere in sight. Off to the art room with me.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

This is getting weird. I just found her hiding behind a tree, and now she's sneaking around the building. What's gotten into her? Did I do something to set off this behavior, or does this have nothing to do with me? I suppose it must have _something_ to do with me- why else would she be avoiding me?

Unable to quench my curiosity, I wait inside the building, and follow her through the halls. Unsurprisingly, she doesn't go to the library, but when she turns down the art hallway, I start asking questions.

I poke my head around the corner as she opens the door at the end of the hall, and enters. I'm close behind.

Sliding the door open so that there's just a crack, I peek in to find Sakura sitting behind an easel on the far side of the room. She rises, and judging by her demeanor, she hasn't realized that I'm here. I watch, intrigued, as she walks up to a table and adds paint to her pallet.

When she sits back down, I find my eyes staring at the back of the easel, wondering what could be on the other side.

For a few minutes, I just stand and watch her expression as she paints. I haven't seen her look so venerable in years. Then, against my better judgement, I turn and walk away, leaving her to her painting.

* * *

My passive attitude only lasts for about twenty-four hours.

It's fifteen minutes into when tutoring should have started when I start getting annoyed. I let it slide yesterday, but this can't become a regular thing.

When I check her locker on my way in, I find her roller blades sitting inside. Well, looks like she's here. Now time to go put an end to this I-don't-give-a-damn attitude of hers.

I march down the art hallway, not trying to be quiet at all. Reaching the room from yesterday, I shove the door out of my way. It makes a thud as it hits the wall. Sakura jumps a little, and her head shoots up. Recognition and terror overtake her features as she sees me.

"Li!" Her eyes steal a panicked glance at the painting, but are on me again in the blink of an eye. "What are you doing here?"

"This is the third day in a row that you've missed tutoring. I decided to investigate."

"Okay," she says slowly, and then rises to her feet. "Well, you caught me. I admit it; I've got a painting obsession. We should probably be heading to the library, then." She's trying to play it cool, but is clearly stalling me. Even as she walks up to me, I don't look at her. My eyes are on the painting that I can't see.

Ignoring her, I step towards it. "So, what are you working on?"

"Nothing much," she says, trying to keep her voice even.

"You're missing our tutoring sessions for it, so surely it's not _nothing_." Her hand reaches out and grabs my arm. The action send electricity shooting through me. I turn. "What's wrong? You're not painting nude, are you?"

Her face flushes, despite her panic. "N-no! Nothing like that." Her hand becomes weak, and I easily pull away from her.

"Then surely you wouldn't mind if I just-"

"Li, don't!"

My voice dies in my throat when I step behind the easel and my eyes fall on the painting. I don't know what I was expecting, but it certainly wasn't this.

My cool demeanor melts away. There's no hiding my utter bewilderment at the sight before me. I want to reject the image before me- to tell myself it's just my eyes playing tricks on me, but they're not.

The undeniable truth is that the painting before me is _of_ me. A younger version of Syaoran Li is plastered onto the paper. Even if it is just an outline, the scene makes it clear. Mostly because I'm not alone. There's another person there as well. It's a girl with auburn hair. More than that, it's none other than the girl who painted the image; Sakura Kinomoto herself. My eyes widen as they register what they're seeing. This can't be, but I know that it is. What else could it possibly be? Sakura is the one working on it. There's no denying it; The painting is of Sakura and I, but the fact that it's Sakura and I in the painting isn't the most alarming part. Not by a long shot. It's what's happening that leaves me so distraught.

The painting captures Sakura on the ground, her pink dress spilled out over the floor, and a single frail arm outstretched so her childlike fingers can hold onto something. That something is my wrist. Her slim fingers cling tightly to it as if her life depends on her ability to not let go. It's heart wrenching, really.

Then there's me.

My hand is balled up into a fist, and I can't tell if Sakura has done it to show anger, or the need for self-control that I really felt at the time. My back is to Sakura. Even though my hair shadows my eyes, I can tell my expression is indifferent. Sakura, on the other hand, has tears streaking down her face.

The way she has portrayed the events on the canvas makes my heart clench, as well as my fists. This isn't how it happened. Does she think it was _easy_ for me to leave her?

In search of an answer, I move my head to look at the artist herself, now standing cautiously in the doorway awaiting my reaction. I stare at her, and she stares right back. Neither of us moves until I take a step forward. In response, Sakura whirls herself around and sprints off down the hall. I find myself running after her at first, but then stop short at the door. She can't run forever. I don't know why she's so averse to talking to me, but after what I just saw, there's no way I'm dropping this. She's still thinking about it, just as I am. That thought alone gives me hope. The hope that maybe I'm not alone in all this.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I don't know why I run. Fight or flight instinct, maybe. All I know is that when I saw the look on Syaoran's face, I knew I couldn't keep hiding from him. If he knows that it still haunts me, there's nothing to stop him from trying to pry the truth from me. The truth as to why all of this is happening. About why I couldn't forgive him.

The worst part is that even I haven't come to allow myself to accept what my heart is telling me. I've never spoken aloud what truly lies within, not even with Tomoyo. She and I both know. Still, neither one of us has ever spoken the words aloud. I'm too afraid of what might happen if I do.

That's all in the past, though. I don't still feel the same way. Syaoran will always reside in my heart, but not the way he used to. It's different now. I can't let him into my heart the same way he used to be.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

Hearing the bell ring, I begin to wonder what will happen in class. How will Sakura act?

My question is answered when I open the door and find she's nowhere in sight. Even as the final bell rings, she doesn't come racing through the door at top speed.

Is she seriously skipping? All because I saw a painting of hers? She's way too devoted to making sure we never talk about what happened.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I shouldn't be skipping. I _really_ shouldn't be skipping. Midterms are only two weeks away, and if I start skipping class, in addition to not knowing the old material, I won't know the new either. If that happens, and I fail the exams, then Terada could just tell Syaoran and I that we have to keep on going through tutoring even longer. What am I supposed to do, though? I can't face Syaoran- not after what just happened.

At work, Chiharu catches me off guard when she pulls me aside during one of the brakes and comes right out saying, "Okay, Sakura, what the heck is going on with you and Li? You two have been acting weird since you stayed over at his house."

"What do you mean?"

Chiharu rolls her eyes. "Don't play coy with me. You're hardly paying attention here at work, and Li was totally out of it today at lunch."

The mention of Syaoran makes me tense. "I don't know what to tell you, Chiharu. If you're implying that something happened, you're wrong."

Chiharu scrutinizes me. "Maybe so, but something is different."

I let out a sigh of frustration. "Why do you even care, Chiharu?"

"Li is my friend," she states confidently.

"Then why don't you try talking to _him_?" I turn and walk briskly back to the kitchen.

I don't want to sound hostile, but I can't tell her. Chiharu has her own problems to worry about. The constant drama between myself and Syaoran shouldn't be something for her to concern herself with. Even if it ruins any possible chance I may have had at becoming close to her again, it's not something I'm ready to talk about. Especially with her.

* * *

When I wake up this Wednesday morning, I don't leave the house until 8:45; This way I won't be late to class, but don't have time to confront Syaoran. Unfortunately, my plan backfires the second I open the front door.

I have to grab the doorframe to stop myself from tripping over the person sitting just outside the door with their back to me.

What's this idiot doing? It's not everyday someone camps out on my front step.

Then the person looks up. I feel my heart leap to my throat. How did I not recognize those chestnut locks? Doesn't matter, there's no mistaking the reddish tint in those otherwise chocolate eyes.

I'm too shocked to move for a moment, so I lean over him with one hand holding the doorknob, and the other grasping the doorframe. My hair falls so that my peripheral vision is blocked, and my eyes see nothing but Syaoran.

His hair falls back out of his face, short strands dangling. He doesn't look anywhere near as threatening as I would have expected- especially with the way I've been avoiding him. Amber orbs are looking at me as if their beholder expects me to do something. So, not wanting to let them down, I _do_ do something.

I hastily step back and begin to shut the door, only to have it stop centimeters from being shut. Confusion washes over me. Why won't this darn thing close? As the door begins to move back against me, I have my answer. Syaoran must be pushing from the other side.

"Go away!" I press my palms to the door.

There's a sliding on the other side, and he pushes the door so hard that I have to bring a foot back and use the step behind me to keep from being thrown back due to the force.

"No! You can't keep avoiding me forever."

Ha! That's where he's wrong.

"Really- because I've been doing a pretty good job at it for the past seven years, if I do say so myself."

There's a low growl from the other side of the door. Next thing I know, the pressure increases until it's too much for me, and I'm thrown back. I pull myself away as fast as I can manage, stumbling back and tripping over the step behind me.

Syaoran, too, comes falling forward, but with his right hand on the doorknob, he manages to catch himself before he can fall forward and wind up- most likely- on _me_.

I waste no time shoving off my shoes and bolting into the house. I don't even have time to see what Syaoran does, but I hear the bang of the front door being slammed shut.

I barely make it to the living room when his hand grabs mine, and I'm jerked to a halt.

"Let go of me!" I try to pry my hand away, but, much like the Chinese finger trap, his grip only seems to tighten.

"Not until you talk to me," he says, his voice as firm as his grip.

I twirl around to face him. "Why do you think I've been avoiding the topic for so many years? It's because I don't want to talk about it."

"Well, you don't have much of a choice now."

"Why won't you let it go? It's in the past. It's been seven _years_. Why do you still care?"

"I still care because I lost my best friend that day. Don't I deserve to know why?"

"You already know why," I scream at him, baring my teeth. "You abandoned me! You were there one day, and the next you weren't," I shout. "You didn't even tell me!"

"I know," he replies with his voice raised, but not strained to the point he's yelling. "And I regret that everyday!"

"Oh, do you?" I yank my hand away. "Well that's just rich, isn't it! Would've been nice if you could have figured that out then, wouldn't it?"

Now he's starting to look pissed. "Oh, please, cut the crap, Sakura. Stop acting like it was all my fault."

"What- so it's _my_ fault you left?" I'm to pissed to care that he used my first name.

"That's not what I'm trying to say."

"Then what? What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that_ we_ did this. Both of us. Neither of us is solely to blame. We didn't communicate, Sakura. If we had just been open with each other about everything, we might still-"

"Stop!" I cry, turning away from him. I can't take this. "Just stop."

"No, I'm not stopping, Sakura." He takes my shoulder and turns me around. "We need to talk about this."

"I don't _want_ to talk about it." I glare at him, and he just rolls his eyes.

"Of course you don't. If you had it your way, you'd pretend it never even happened."

"Yeah, I would, and I don't see anything wrong with that. It doesn't matter. What difference will it make?"

"Well, that's just it, isn't it? The matter of whether or not it changes anything."

"It doesn't," I state firmly. Syaoran raises an eyebrow.

"Is that so? You wanna talk about why?" he asks coyly. In turn, I give him a look of disgust.

"Just stop, Li." As soon as the words are out of my mouth, his face darkens. The look he fixes me with sends shivers down my spine.

Desperate to change the topic, I find myself saying, "we're going to be late."

Syaoran's eyes travel from me to the clock on the wall. "Shit." Before he turns and heads back towards the door, he looks me in the eyes and states, "we aren't done talking about this."

At the door, he grabs his shoes and turns back to me. "Are you coming?"

Hesitantly, I step forward. "Yeah."

* * *

**Happy early Mother's Day! I wish you all a wonderful day.**


	10. Out Comes the Truth

**Alright, It's done. I'm warning you guys now that this chapter gets really emotional. I'm interested to know what you all think about what happens. Sorry it had to be a day late. Hope you enjoy.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

The bell rings mere seconds before Syaoran shoves the door aside and we go tumbling into the classroom. Our entire class turns and stares at us.

Syaoran and I stand side-by-side in front of the door panting. Well, I'm panting and probably red-faced, whereas Syaoran barely looks past being winded. If that weren't so entertaining, I'd undoubtedly be pissed at him.

"Kinomoto, Li; Detention." Damn it. Here I though that since we were so close, maybe Mr. Terada would let us off the hook, but apparently I was wrong.

I grumble under my breath and follow Syaoran to the back of the room. Tomoyo eyes us as we sit down.

"What happened to the two of you? Did you have to outrun a pride of lions or something?"

My attempt at a laugh comes out as more of a painfully awkward mutation between a cough and an exhale. "Not exactly." I glance back at Syaoran and find him staring back at me. Startled, I zip my head back to Tomoyo. "Do you mind if I steal you during lunch today?" I ask as inconspicuously as I can. She raises an eyebrow, but nods.

* * *

By the time lunch rolls around, I'm sweating bullets. Syaoran's presence behind me is _seriously_ stressing me out. He's like a wolf stalking its prey, just waiting for the chance to strike. So as soon as the bell rings I turn to Tomoyo and practically drag her out of the classroom.

We've reached the end of the hall and rounded the corner when she comes to a stop and I'm forced to end me march as well.

"Whoa, Sakura! I can tell something's going on, but why are we running?"

I relax my grip on her. "Sorry, Tomoyo. It's just that sitting in there with him was shooting my stress levels through the roof." Other students turn the corner and begin to walk down the hall. "Speaking of the roof, can we go there now? I really need to talk to you, and I think you know why."

"I've got a pretty good idea." She follows my gaze to where the other students are. "Alright, let's go." She gestures for me to lead the way, and I do so happily.

* * *

**Tomoyo's POV**

The second I close the door to the roof, there are words tumbling from Sakura's mouth.

"Alright, so do you remember how last week I passed out and spent the night at Syaoran's place, and how I've been avoiding him ever since."

I kind of figured that whatever it was it had to do with Li. Seeing them come running into the classroom together earlier this morning set off warning bells in my head.

Nodding, I walk over to where she sit, and lowering myself down next to her. "Of course. How could I forget?"

"Right, well-" I cut her off.

"Hold on a second, Sakura." She blinks as if taken aback. "Did you two _talk_?" When she nods, I feel my heart leap. "Was it a good talk or a bad talk?"

Sakura's lips curl up in disgust. "Bad. Very bad, Tomoyo."

I raise an eyebrow. "How so?"

I watch as Sakura's gaze shifts to something off in the distance. "He's making me talk to him about what happened after he left."

Ah. It all makes sense now. Sakura has been acting strange because of Li.

All I can manage to say is, "Oh." Sakura doesn't seem to mind, though.

"It was awful, Tomoyo! He just suddenly showed up on my doorstep this morning and forced his way into my house." I momentarily think I heard her wrong, but judging from the look on her face, I can tell I didn't. "I don't even think what he did was legal." Now that she mentions it, neither am I.

"He basically forced me to talk to him." To mask my curiosity, I take a bite of my food. Ah, yes, this rice is absolutely delicious. "He was even calling me by my first name," she says, waving her hands dramatically.

"The nerve," I say sarcastically. Sakura just glares at me.

"Anyways, the problem is that he said we weren't done talking about it."

"So there's going to be more?"

"Well, no, not if I can help it, but he sure seems to think there will be." Sakura angrily pokes at her food. I allow my chopsticks to rest on my lunch while I watch her. Her brow creases as she shoves food into her mouth. Very unflattering, but she clearly doesn't care about that. Then again, nothing Sakura does is ever truly distasteful.

Finally I dare to speak. "Would it really be such a bad thing?"

Sakura stops, mid-bite, and looks up at me. "Of course it would," she says as if it's the most obvious thing in the world.

"Why?" I know I should stop, but I can't.

Sakura carelessly tosses her lunch onto the ground. "You _know_ why." Her gaze is intense.

I look her up and down, making mental note of her posture as I say, "I do know, Sakura; I just didn't think that you did."

At first she's surprised, then she looks hurt. Not mad, but hurt. It's way worse. All I can do is sit and watch as she slams the lid down on her lunch and stands up.

"Sakura," I say slowly and tiredly. She knows that I didn't mean to hurt her, but I still did, nonetheless.

"It's fine, Tomoyo." Her tone says otherwise. I reach out and catch her hand before she can turn away from me.

"I'm sorry, Sakura. I shouldn't have gone there."

She looks me in the eyes for a moment before she sighs and shakes her head. "No, it's okay. Can we not talk about that, though?"

Not wanting to push her, I nod. "Of course." Sakura sits down next to me again, and in an attempt to change the subject I ask, "So what do you usually do when I'm with Chiharu at lunch nowadays?"

I'm relieved when I see a fond smile play on Sakura's lips. "I actually met someone really nice in the library."

"Oh my gosh!" That smile, the way she phrased that- could it be? "Is it a boy? How come you didn't tell me earlier?" The idea of me talking to Sakura about her love life feels surreal.

Sakura looks at me as if I've lost my mind. "No, it's a girl. She's a senior from class A."

"A senior? Do I know her?"

"I don't think so. Her name is Yanagisawa Naoko." When my eyes widen, I can tell Sakura is confused.

"Yanagisawa?" I repeat.

She nods. "Yeah, do you know her?"

"Not personally." Sakura's head tilts to the side, and it becomes clear to me that she doesn't realize who the girl she's been spending lunch with is. "How have you not heard of her?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Naoko Yanagisawa has the highest grades in our class," I explain.

Sakura's eyes widen and she leans away. "What? I thought that Syaoran did."

I tap my cheek. "I don't know for sure. They're always switching from one to the other. Point is, every time exams come around, her name is always one of the top three on the board."

The 'board' I'm referring to is a bulletin board in the main hall that lists the names of the top fifty students after exams. The teachers use it to encourage students to study more and do their homework, but a lot of us just find it to be a torment on those of us who aren't especially bright. Some students are super competitive, though. Personally, I don't care for the board much.

"That's insane." Sakura tilts her head back in thought. "It sure explains a lot, though." She looks at me again. "The girl is a genius. She's always reading and writing. Not only that, she even _looks_ super mature. I mistook her for a teacher when we first met."

"No surprise there." I take a sip from my juice box. "I'm impress, though, Sakura." She raises her eyebrows, and I continue saying, "That you are making new friends. I didn't think you were interested in that sort of thing."

Sakura just shrugs. "I decided a while ago that I wanted to make the best of my senior year by getting closer to Rika. If I meet other new people along the way, then all the better." The idea brings a smile to my face.

"Well good for you." There's a crinkling sound the next time I take a sip from the juice box. Looking down I realize it's empty. Placing it on my lunchbox, I say, "I'd like to meet her sometime. If you don't mind, that is."

Sakura's eyes light up and a small smile tugs at her lips. "I'd love that."

For the rest of lunch we sit and talk about a variety of different topics. As lunch comes to an end, I can't help but think how much of a pity it is. Sakura and I rarely get to just sit back and talk anymore. It's a shame.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

On any other day of the week the ringing of the final bell would make me ecstatic. Today, however, not so much.

I get a sense of déjà vu as I watch Tomoyo leave the classroom. It's just Syaoran and I left in the room when Mr. Terada motions us to sit up in the front. _Off to my death sentence_, I think as I rise from my seat and head up the isle.

At the front I sit down in Rika's seat in the first row, and Syaoran sits down next to me. Mr. Terada takes a seat at his desk. Two fingers pinch the bridge of his nose for a moment before he looks up at us.

The first thing out of his mouth is, "How's tutoring?" The question throws me.

"Its-" I'm not sure what to say, but apparently Syaoran does.

"She's progressing, but we've still got a ways to go." As he says it, he glances over at me. It's a harmless motion that makes me uneasy.

Mr. Terada nods, satisfied with the answer. He doesn't speak again until somewhere around twenty minutes later when the door to the classroom slides open, making me jump.

The teacher of class C stands in the doorway and observes the scene before her. She turns to the man in charge and says, "Mr. Terada, I'm sorry to interrupt, but the printer seems to have gotten jammed again. You're the only one who knows how to fix it, so," she gestures down the hall, "when you get the chance..."

Mr. Terada nods. "I'll be right there." To Syaoran and I he says, "You two wait here and stay silent. I'll be back in a few minutes."

I watch helplessly as the only person standing between Syaoran and I exits the classroom. I have to summon all of my willpower stop myself from reaching out and begging him not to leave. At the door, he turns and looks at us one more time. Then the door closes, and I'm left alone in a silent classroom with Li Syaoran.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

As soon as Mr. Terada is out of the room, I spin in my chair to face Sakura. She leans slightly away and looks me up and down from the corner of her eye.

"So," I start.

"So..." She glances around the room as if looking for an escape route. As if she'd have the nerve to leave detention. As if I'd let her. No, she's not going anywhere.

"Let's _talk_," I suggest.

"This is detention. We aren't allowed to talk."

"The teacher is gone." I gesture around the empty classroom. "There's no one here to stop us." She finally looks at me full on.

"Please, can you just drop it?" She begs. The desperation in her eyes is overwhelming.

"No. You're begging me to drop it; Well, I'm begging you not to."

I can tell now that she's getting tired of my constant nagging, because she finally gives in and says, "Fine. You wanna talk about it, then let's go ahead and talk about it. I already said all I had to say this morning, though."

"That's wonderful, but I didn't, so listen to me." I take a deep breath. "There's something I need you to understand about when I left." Sakura doesn't pull away when I reach out and take one of her hands in mine. "Leaving you was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. When I got that phone call from my mom, the first thing I though of was you." It makes me feel a little better when Sakura turns a bright shade of pink.

"Then why didn't you ever tell me?"

Unable to hold back anymore, my grip tightens and I say, "Because I was scared!"

Sakura's eyes go wide. "W-what?"

"I was terrified of facing you. More than that, I was terrified of what my leaving would do to you. I was scared of what you would do."

"What did you think I was going to do? Commit suicide?" The way she spits the words out at me tells me that the thought disgusts her.

"The thought may have crossed my mind. Can you blame me, though?" She shakes her head as if too disappointed to speak. "Your mom was in the hospital with cancer for crying out loud!"

"So you thought I'd just give up," she snaps. "You thought that I would put even more strain on my family by doing something like that?"

"Maybe I did." My mind replays the evens of seven years ago. "I still remember getting that call from Daidouji telling me she was gone." Picking up that phone and hearing the words that my best friend's mother was dead... I tried to deny it. Tried to tell myself it was all just a bad dream. "I knew that I had to come back when she told me that." I look at her hand in mine. "Of course, by then it was too late." My grip loosens. "I let you slip through my fingers." Her hand falls and limply hangs in the air until she moves and holds it in the other.

But there's something else. Something that sticks out in my mind more than any of the other things.

In a purely serious way I look up at her hand ask, "Do you remember what you said to me the day of her funeral?" The ways she looks down at her lap tells me that she does. "You told me that you felt like you could die." I lean down to catch her gaze. Her emerald eyes look at me through auburn bangs. "Do you have any idea how terrified that made me?"

Even now, I remember it like it was just yesterday.

The funeral was held at beginning of winter. The first snow of the season had grazed the tips of every blade of grass, making them sparkle like gemstones. For a funeral, it was an uncharacteristically beautiful day with the white snow being greatly contrasted by all the people adorn in black.

On that one day, I shared an intimate moment with strangers. People who I had never met before were grieving around me. While most of the faces were ones I didn't recognize, there were a few I did. The whole group from school was there. Tomoyo, Chiharu, and Takashi all stood in a side-by-side holding hands as if to support each other. Tomoyo's mother held onto her daughter's hand and shed silent tears over the loss of her dearest cousin. I stood near them, but not entirely _with_ them.

For most of the ceremony I just stood there and watched the family. My eyes naturally drifted to Sakura, but I vaguely remember her brother and father, too.

Sakura's father, Fujitaka, looked empty. It was as if someone had stuffed out the light in his eyes that used to shine so brightly. From that point on his body was the host of a lost soul.

Her brother, on the other hand, stood tall and stolid. He was the only one that managed to stay composed. It was clear he had to, though. The others were relying on him for support that would've otherwise come from Fujitaka.

Sakura's expression was similar, but not identical, to that of her father. She stood emotionlessly staring at the casket that held her mother. She looked so fragile and breakable; Just like glass.

As the funeral came to an end and the others began to go their separate ways, I hung back. When it happened, Touya had been pulled away to speak to some of their extended family, and Fujitaka was standing in front of the gaping hole in the ground. I had followed Tomoyo and the others to where Sakura stood apart from all of the others. Chiharu, Takashi, and I all watched while Tomoyo stepped up to Sakura and pulled her into a hug. She whispered hushed words to Sakura, but I never caught what it was she was saying.

After a few minutes of this, Tomoyo released Sakura, turned to looked at Chiharu, nodded, and walked back to where her mother stood waiting for her.

Chiharu walked up to Sakura still holding Takashi's hand, but didn't say anything. They just stood there staring at each other until Chiharu finally broke eye contact. It wasn't until Takashi guided her away that I realized she was crying.

With the others gone, I was unsure of what to do. Back then, I was only ten. I had no idea what to do or say to make Sakura feel better. The only funeral I had ever attended was my fathers, but I was an infant at the time. Sakura, however, spared me from having to figure out what to do. At the time, I wished she hadn't.

"I feel like I'm going to die." She said it with the same emotionless expression that made me shiver. The words raised a red flag in my head. "I feel like I'm going to die, Syaoran."

That was the last time I ever heard her call me by my first name. Until a few days ago, that is.

Returning to reality, Sakura bites her bottom lip and doesn't look up. "You still went back again, though, Li." Her words stab my heart.

I wish I had never heard her call my name that night. Would it hurt this much if I hadn't? No, it wouldn't. I had finally grown to tolerate her calling me Li, but now, after Friday night, I can't stand it.

In response to her words I say, "I did, but for those months while I was there, I watched you. I used to follow you to and from school because I was so paranoid of what you might do while I wasn't watching."

"You were _stalking_ me?" She looks so horrified that I wince a bit. I'd never really thought of it as stalking, but I suppose I was more or less obsessing. "That's kinda creepy."

"My reasons were justified." I say it partly to convince myself.

"You don't still do that, right?"

"What? No! I stopped when I left to go back to Hong Kong for the second time."

I left her twice. The first time was the hardest. She had ambushed me at the airport and almost begged me to stay. The second time I left was a few months after the funeral. Sakura hadn't spoken to me at all since the day of the funeral, so when my mom called and insisted I return, I had no real reason to stay.

"Good. Although you never should have done it in the first place. I can take care of myself, you know."

"I'm aware of that now, but back then I wasn't so sure." I can tell that she still doesn't see what I mean so I say, "What would you have done?"

"Well for one, I wouldn't have left in the first place." Frustrated, I stand up and pace the front of the classroom. "I'd have stayed and been there," she says to my back as I run a hand through my hair and look out the window. "Like any decent friend would have." That's it. Now she's gone to far.

I spin to face her, and march over to her desk. When I get there, I slam my hands down on the desk, making her flinch. My voice is low as I say, "I may have done some really stupid shit, but don't you _dare_ tell me I wasn't a good friend to you." She opens her mouth to protest, but I don't allow it. "I called you every _day _that I was gone. You never once picked up, but I still called. So don't you make it sound like I didn't care. I cared enough to try." I lean back, my fingertips still grazing the desk. "More than I can say for you."

Her emerald eyes go wide. Hysterically, she says, "Excuse me," as if she's too awestruck to say anything else.

"You heard me. At least I tried. I clung onto what we had. You just kept on shutting me out, though. You're _still_ shutting me out."

Her jaw hangs slack until she pipes up and says, "I shut you out to protect myself! I had no choice. How was I ever supposed to accept you back in my life after that?" In her rage, I can still hear the desperation in her voice.

"You always have a choice."

Furiously, she shakes head. "No! Not after that."

"Oh yeah? And why is that?"

"You wouldn't understand!" I hear her voice crack, but don't stop.

"Try me," I challenge.

Glaring up at me with tear brimmed eyes she shouts, "You broke my heart that day, Syaoran! I loved you, and you broke my heart!"

What? Everything seems to spin. _Love_? She _loved_ me?

I stumble away from her while she buries her face in her hands and cries. I fall back into the chair I was sitting in before, and stare at her. In under ten seconds she had said the two things that I'd wanted to hear from her most. She both called be by my first name again and told me she loved me. So why does my chest ache so much?

At that very moment the door slides open. Mr. Terada freezes in the doorway and looks from me to Sakura who is sitting hunched over in her chair bawling her eyes out.

"What the-" Realizing what he's about to say, Mr. Terada stops. He composes himself first before entering the room and walking over to Sakura. "What happened here?" He looks at me, but I just stare back too dazed to respond. Seeing that I'm useless, Mr. Terada turns to Sakura. "Kinomoto, come with me." Sakura's finger's part a little as she looks up at our teacher. "Ms. Mizuki is probably still here. She'll see you." He gestures for Sakura to follow him. It takes a while, but she eventually stands and follows him to the door. Her arms wrap protectively around her slim figure as she goes. Not once does she look at me.

After Sakura is out the door, Mr. Terada turns to me and says, "You can go for now, Li," before vanishing the same way as Sakura.

Even though he told me I could go, I stay rooted to the spot where I sit. I'm too numb to move. All I can do is sit and stare at the door.

She loved me. As in she used to, but not anymore. Still, to think that back then... All that time... She had felt the same way about me that I felt about her.

My mind races. What if I hadn't left? Where would we be today if I had stayed with her? If I hadn't been such a coward, would we still be friends? Or would we be something else? Something _more_.

My stomach twists dangerously, and I feel like I'm going to be sick. I should never have pried. Why couldn't I have just left it alone? Anything is better than this. Wondering what we could've been. Longing for it. And most of all, knowing that it can never be.

* * *

**There you have it. I did it. Well, kind of. Sakura's deep dark secret has been revealed. Let me know what you all think.**


	11. What Now?

**Sorry that this is a day late, guys. Don't have much news today. Oh yeah, this chapter is 100% Sakura's POV, but Syaoran will be back soon.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I said it. I actually said it. My deepest, darkest secret that I've never told anybody, not even Tomoyo... I just told the one person who I swore never to let find out. Now he knows. Syaoran _knows_, yet, oddly enough, now that I've cooled off, I'm not really feeling much. I don't feel anxious or on edge as if I'm waiting for it to be said, because it's already out there. Sure, I know I should still be worried about what's going to happen next, but I just don't. Not now, anyways. Maybe a little later when the reality of it all sinks in I'll start feeling jittery again, but until then all I feel is relaxed. It's as if a weight has been lifted.

As I lay on the bed in the nurse's office staring up at the bland ceiling, I feel more relaxed than I've felt in years. My peace is cut short when the curtain leading to the rest of the office is pulled back. Ms. Mizuki stands there in a long white trench coat with her hair tied back, and a stethoscope slung around her neck. Stereotypical nurse; The only thing she's missing is a clipboard.

"Are you feeling any better?"

"Much," I tell her with a smile.

"Good. If you don't mind me asking, what happened?"

Not even bothering to hide it, I simply say, "Syaoran." Ms. Mizuki nods as if that explains everything. "I told him how I felt about him when we were kids." I watch the older woman pull away in shock. "Yeah," I say with a sigh. "It wasn't intentional, it just kinda came pouring out. I don't regret it, though. It feels like a weight has been lifted." My gaze shifts down to my hands as I twiddle my thumbs. "I just wonder what's going to happen next."

"I'm sure everything will turn out alright. You and Li used to be best friends, but that was years ago. The two of you aren't the same people you were back then."

She has a point. Syaoran and I have spent years apart molding into different people. I don't harbor those same feelings for him that I used to. I don't still love him. Sure, I still care for him more than I would like, but what I feel for him isn't love.

"Yeah," I agree, staring up at the ceiling again. "That's very true."

* * *

My arrival at work isn't very well received. Mrs. Matsumoto doesn't bother asking me why I'm late, and Chiharu won't even look at me. Ruby asks me if I'm alright, but even she doesn't seem too concerned.

At the end of the day, Chiharu heads out before me, and I run out the door to catch up with her. "Chiharu!" She stops and turns. "Can I talk to you?" There's a moment of consideration before she nods.

"Is this about the other day?" I nod; She sighs.

"Look, I just wanna say that I'm sorry. The truth is that something _did_ happen, but I just didn't want to tell you about it." She seems to relax a little hearing me say it aloud.

"Well, does that mean you're going to tell me now?"

"Only if you want to know."

She eyes me. "What do you think?" Of course she's too proud to admit that she really does.

"The thing is that Syaoran walked in on me the other day while I was painting, and the painting was of me and him."

"So?" She makes it sound like no big deal.

Wow. She really isn't getting this at all. "_So_ it deeply portrayed how I felt after he left."

Chiharu shrugs and says, "We all know how you felt. You were pissed. It's not exactly news."

"Should've told Syaoran that. He barged into my house this morning and insisted I explain myself to him." Now I've got her attention. She actually looks rather amused.

"He broke into your house?" She doesn't bother hiding her smile.

"More or less, but that's not the point." I consider telling her about what happened this afternoon. "There's more, too, Chiharu." No reason to hide it from her. Syaoran and I are probably going to have to start interacting more now, anyways. "We had detention today and," I pause, "something happened. Before I tell you what it was, though, I need to ask you something." Chiharu nods. "That day when you said you couldn't take it anymore, you were talking about how I always came to you and vented my problems, right?"

She doesn't seem too surprised by the question, nor is she too reluctant to give me and answer. "Yes."

"I figured," I mutter. It wan't hard to guess. There isn't really anything else she could have meant. "Chiharu, I don't want to make you feel suffocated by me like you did then. That said, do you still want me to tell you what happened? Because I'll tell you now that we didn't have a lighthearted conversation about what the weather was like outside."

For a moment Chiharu just studies me; Then she looks away. Her eyes glaze over as she stares up at the sky above us. My gaze follows hers, and I watch the setting sun illuminate the clouds giving them a pinkish glow.

"Sakura, back then the reason I couldn't handle hearing about those things wasn't entirely because of you."

"Did it have to do with your parents?" The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them.

She looks down at me. "You knew?"

"Something you said that day I went to your house made me start to wonder, but I didn't know for sure until now."

"Oh. Well, yes. My parents had just started fighting, and it was really effecting me. I couldn't go to you and talk about it, nor could I go to Tomoyo. The two of you already had so much going on that it just didn't seem like it would be fair for me to worry you both with it. In the end, Takashi was the only one who I told. Tomoyo didn't find out until a lot later. At first I was able to juggle the two lives- home and school- but eventually I just couldn't. To be honest, Sakura," she looks ashamed, "I started to resent you."

Her words knock the wind out of me. Sure, maybe she did have every reason and right to, but I still can't help the feelings of hurt and betray. I also feel a bit guilty, too. I hadn't even noticed the change in Chiharu. What kind of a friend does that make me?

"I'm sorry, Chiharu. For everything I put you through," I say earnestly.

Chiharu shakes her head. "It's fine, Sakura. I'm over it now."

Her ability to let things go so easily is a quality I don't possess. It's one of the things that I envy about her.

"So yes; I would like to hear about what happened with Li-kun if you're willing to tell me."

"Alright then." I gesture for us to start on our way home and proceed to fill her in on all that happened after Mr. Terada left the classroom to fix the printer in the faculty room. As my story comes to end, Chiharu looks incredibly intrigued.

"So, what are you going to do now?"

"I don't know," I admit, kicking a pebble with my foot. It skids across the pavement and stops a few feet away. "Probably nothing. Odds are Syaoran will do all the work for me."

"What do you mean?"

"He _never_ lets up. Once he's got his mind set on something, he doesn't go away until he's got it."

"But didn't he already get everything he wanted from you? He finally got the talk he wanted, didn't he?"

I laugh an empty, emotionless laugh. "Yeah, so you would think. It's going to be _so_ weird. How do you react to something like that, anyways? When someone goes up to you and says, 'by the way, I used to be head over heels in love with you' is there really a good way to respond to that?"

Chiharu considers this. "Not that I can think of. Just go on like normal, maybe? What's there to do when they're feelings that you don't still have?" She says, referring to me. "If you still felt that way, it would be totally different." She looks at me a little worried. "You aren't still in love with him, right?"

"Of course not!" Sure, I blush every once in a while, but how can I not? Especially when he does things like hold me close so I don't fall. Just thinking about it makes me feel warm.

I can tell she's not convinced, though. "Right." I'm about to object when she continues. "I don't know what to tell you, but if it were me, I'd probably just wait and see how it plays out. If Li doesn't bother you about it, then I think it's safe to say nothing much will change."

"And if he does?" Chiharu pauses mid-stride.

"Then you'll just have to see what he has to say."

The advise itself is good enough, but not quite what I was hoping for. I don't want to have to sit around waiting for Syaoran to do something. That would seem too much like I'm throwing in the towel. There's got to be a better way to do this... But do I have the courage to take matters into my own hands? Guess I'll find out soon enough.

* * *

Unbelievable that so much has happened this week and yet it's still only Thursday. I spent all night thinking about what Chiharu said yesterday. Maybe she's right. Should I just wait and let Syaoran make the first move?

"Gah, this is way too stressful," I holler, clutching my head and rolling over in bed. Burying my face in one of my pillows, I grumble, "Can't I just stay here in bed forever?"

I'm not expecting the voice that answers. "No, you can't. Now get up."

"Huh?" I shoot up in bed and stare at the door. Touya stands in the doorway to my room watching me with a meek expression. "What the-" I jump up from bed and wag a finger at him. "What are you still doing here? You should be at work."

"Good to see you, too, little monster." Little monster? Who does he think he is?

"Stop calling me that! Why are you still here, anyways? You're usually out the door by now."

"I only work a half day today. Yuki has something he needs my help with, so I'm going in late."

"Oh." I lower my arm, then remember where he's standing. "What do you think you're doing barging into my room?"

"You were making so much noise that I was starting to think you were being abducted." He pauses. "That or there was someone in here with you."

Oh, please say no more. I already know where he's going with this. "Well there's _not_," I hiss, "so get out."

Touya shrugs and turns to go. "There are scrambled eggs downstairs if you want any," he says over his shoulder at me. The thought of food makes my mouth water. Scrambled eggs is perhaps the only thing Touya can actually make that tastes half decent.

"I do, so don't eat them all. I'll be down in ten."

"Whatever you say, kiddo." I decide to let that one slide.

Touya walks down the hall to go downstairs as I head to the bathroom. After a hasty shower, I head downstairs to find him sitting at the kitchen table with a piece of toast hanging out of his mouth. I plop down opposite him and dish some of the eggs onto my plate. When I look at the clock, it reads quarter to eight.

Truth be told, I haven't given much thought to whether or not I'll go to tutoring today. On one hand I could go, face Syaoran, and get whatever there is coming to me. That, or I could skip again like the coward I am and have that much more to deal with when I see him next. Although the later would _not_ be for my midterm grades.

I sigh, and across from me Touya asks, "Something on your mind?"

The question makes me debate whether or not to tell him. Of course, I know that I can't explain the situation to him without him freaking out. If I openly told my over protective big brother that I used to be in love with with my best friend who is now my tutor and the person whose house I spent the night at last week, he would go an a rampage. Worse than just that, he would probably command that I never see Syaoran again, which, as nice as it may sound, isn't an option. There's no taking the easy way out of this problem.

So, in the end, I decide just to say, "Not much. Midterms are coming up, though, and they've got me pretty stressed."

"Oh." Whenever I bring up something at school, it makes Touya uncomfortable. I assume it's because he dropped out and it's a touchy subject for him. "Alright then." He goes on eating another piece of toast.

I spend the next ten minutes chewing on eggs and a piece of toast. Afterwards, I head upstairs, finish getting ready for school, and make my way back downstairs to where Touya stands idly in the kitchen staring out the window.

"Hey, I'm heading out now," I call, pulling him out of his trance.

He turns around and says, "Alright. I'm going to be home late tonight, so don't stay up."

"Got it. Bye!" I open the door and walk outside, not bothering to put on my roller blades.

Now outside, I lean back against the door and sigh. "Great, what am I supposed to do now?"

"Talk to me if you don't mind."

"Wha-" I slap my hand over my mouth to silence myself. A certain amber eyed tutor stands at the end of the driveway watching me.

Glancing over my shoulder at the house, I imagine the horrors of what would happen if Touya were to walk out and find Syaoran standing in front of our house.

When I turn to Syaoran again, he's pushing himself off the wall and running a hand anxiously through his hair. "I-I think we should probably talk about..." He pauses, so I pipe up.

"About what I said yesterday?" He nods. "Alright, but not here." I walk over to him, and lead the way down the street and away from the house.

"Oh. Um, okay." Wow. He's really nervous right now. Glancing over my shoulder at him, I see he's got his head down and his hands stuffed awkwardly in his pockets. Even his shoulders are hunched. It's quite a sight to be seen.

We're no longer the view of my house when I stop in front of a bench along the sidewalk and gesture for Syaoran to sit down. He does so, and when I don't follow suit, that only seems to make him even more jittery.

"Relax, would you? I'm not going to start yelling at you this time." I can tell he doesn't buy it. "Don't forget that you're the one who started all this."

"Yeah, I know I did, but I never thought that you would tell me something like that you-"

"That I used to be in love with you?" I surprise even myself with how easily it comes out. He just nods and looks away. "Well I wasn't expecting it either." My arms fold themselves across my body. "I want to make one thing perfectly clear, though, Li." He looks up at me as if something I've said has caught him by surprise. "That was years ago. I don't still feel the same way I did back then. My feelings for you don't change anything."

Syaoran clearly disagrees. He quickly objects. "Of course they do! You can't just tell me that you used to be in love with me, and not expect it to change anything."

"There's nothing you can do about it now." It's not as though it would have changed anything then, either. Syaoran never saw me the same way that I saw him. If he had, he wouldn't have left. "You missed you're chance to do anything a long time ago."

There's something in the way his face hardens that makes me hopeful despite knowing it's not for the reason I secretly wish it were for. He didn't feel the same way, right? I have to mentally slap myself. Of course not. Don't let yourself ever think otherwise, Sakura.

"Still..." He sounds desperate.

"Still nothing. You can't turn back time, Li."

I'm not sure exactly what it is about what I've said, but suddenly he stands up and steps close to me. "You're right. I can't turn back time." I step back an lean away. Why is he suddenly so serious? "But I _can_ still change what happens next, so I would like to make a proposal." What does he mean, 'a proposal'? "How about we call a truce?"

I stare blankly at him. "A truce?"

"Yeah," he says. "Don't you see how much easier it would make things?" My head falls to the side. "I'll take that as a no. How can you not see it, though."

"See what?"

"How much of a hassle all this is!"

"All what is?"

Syaoran groans and tilts his head back. "For crying out loud, you're so dense."

"Hey!" Of course he ignores me.

"Just think about it, Sakura." I'm about to protest when he continues. "It would make things easier for everyone. You and Mihara are talking to each other again, right?"

I think back to yesterday. It finally feels like I'm close to her again. Like we could become friends again if we tried. "Yeah, but what does that have to do with us?"

"If we weren't avoiding each other all the time, there'd be nothing separating you from the rest of us."

"Are you referring to lunch? I'm not going to suddenly start eating with everyone again just because you make a peace offering."

"That's fine," Syaoran says quickly. "I don't expect you to." He says 'don't' as if I've already agreed to it. "Don't forget about Daidouji, either."

Tomoyo's face pops up in my mind. "Why?"

Syaoran shakes his head and says as if it's the most obvious thing in the world, "She suffers the most from this whole mess. Haven't you noticed how much effort she puts into being friends with both you and Mihara at the same time?"

I think about it. Sure, Tomoyo goes through a lot to be friends with Chiharu and I, but we both understand and respect that she isn't going to choose sides. It's not as though we pressure her to give one of us more attention than the other... Right?

"Then there's us." I wait for him to elaborate, and sure enough he does. "We still have to put up with each other everyday for tutoring. If we can't deal with this problem once and for all, there's no way that we'll ever be able to pull that off, and we both know that's not an option."

He's got a point. I we can't keep on seeing one another every day without being open about everything that was said.

"We can't dance around the topic anymore." I wince at the thought of having to talk about it again, and he quickly adds, "Not that we have to talk about it all the time, either." This time I nod in approval. We can't avoid it and pretend it didn't happen, but I'm not ready to just start talking about it on a day to day basis as if it's nothing.

"Look," he says, and I meet his gaze. "I'm not asking you to suddenly forgive me for all the crap I put you through over the years, but I _am_ asking you for a fresh start. We put the past behind us and act like the young adults that we are." Then Syaoran takes me by surprise. He offers me his hand. "So, truce?"

I stare at the hand for a while. I can tell he's starting to get uneasy when he shifts his weight from one foot to the other, so I look up at him and say, "Alright, fine." I reach out and take his hand. The contact sends electricity shooting up my arm. "If that's the case, though, then I should tell you that even though I'm willing to try to work this out, I'm never going to forget about what happened."

My heart races when Syaoran leans forward, lets go of my hand, and whispers with his face inches from mine, "I would never ask you to."

* * *

**Thanks for reading. Happy (one day early) Memorial Day!**


	12. Call Me 'Syaoran'

**Finally! I finished it. Okay, so about last chapter, I looked back and realized that I forgot to change the section separators. In case that happens in the future, you all should know that those ten x's are the same as the line that usually separates the different sections. I type the chapters in a pages document on my computer, so I don't have the line thing that the website includes. Oh, but if you go back and look now they're already gone. I just went back and reposted the chapter.**

**Note: I edited this really fast, so if you find errors, that's why. Well, that and I'm not very good at editing to begin with.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

_Thunk_. The stack of papers hits the table. "It's official. We've got one week left until midterms."

I allow myself to fall reluctantly into the chair in front of the wooden library table. Ever since I agreed to a fresh start with Syaoran, he's taken the newfound friendliness- if you can even call it that- and used it to his advantage by stuffing my brain full of information for the midterms. He was already doing that before, but now it's just crazy. As if by agreeing to his proposal also meant agreeing to never-ending amounts of work being shoved in my face. He doesn't make me do anything outside of school, thankfully, but last week he gave me math problems to do during lunch then give to him by the end of the day. It's absolute madness. My brain is on overload. Max capacity.

"There's no way I'm ever going to pull this off." It's true. Even if I, by some miracle, manage to pass Japanese, history _and_ science, there's simply no _way_ I'll be able to pass math. No matter how much practice he makes me do, I still don't understand it.

"Well, not with that attitude, you're not," Syaoran says. His optimism is something that we don't share. Maybe he's just so gleeful that I'm not arguing with him anymore that he's put himself in a false sense of security. I almost want to say to him, 'Hey, it's impossible, so just give up', but, at the same time, I don't want to hurt his feelings, as strange as it sounds.

While I sit and ponder over whether or not to crush his dreams of getting me to pass all my exams, Syaoran walks past the seat he usually sits in and continues behind me. Noticing the change, I crane my head to watch him. Where is he going?

My question is answered as he stops in front of the seat next to me, pulls it out, and sits down as if this behavior is nothing new. Thing is, it _is_ new; Very new. Afterwards, he proceeds to reach past me and slide the papers between us.

The entire time I just sit and watch him, totally confused. "What are you doing?"

When he turns towards me, his face is close enough for me to see all of his long lashes as his amber eyes look up at me through them. "Getting you ready for this exam before it's too late."

Lost in his eyes and losing my train of though, I manage to say, "I meant why are you sitting here instead of there?" I gesture to the seat across from me where he's sat every other time we've been in here together.

"Ah," Syaoran sighs in understanding. He looks back down at the papers and flips through them as he says, "It's easier for me to explain when I can just look over your shoulder rather than try doing it upside down."

"Oh." It's all I can get out. Not like there's much else to be said, anyways.

"Yes, oh; Now down to work." Syaoran turns, and amber eyes vanish from sight.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

_Click_, _flick_, _tap_. _Click_, _flick_, _tap_. _Click_, _flick_, _tap_. Beside me, Sakura stares down at a textbook and twirls her pen around in her hand. Something about the way she does it makes me admire how adorable she looks with her face scrunched up as she glares at the text.

This is bad. She's already starting to mess with my head, and all she's doing is playing with her pen. Geez, is it really only Tuesday? How am I going to keep on doing this all week?

I don't even notice that she's stopped until she says, "Hey, Li, this doesn't make any sense at all." The sound of her voice effectively pulls me out of my trance.

There she goes using my last name again. I guess it was too much to hope for her to start referring to me by my first name in addition to everything else. Still, she called me Syaoran before, back when she... Alright, focus, Syaoran. Every time I think back to what she said, the words replay _over_ and _over_ again in my head, and I can feel myself getting lost in them.

Sighing, I lean closer to her and determine what the problem is. "What's there not to understand about this? It's history, not math." Seriously, how can history not make sense? It's events that have already happened. It's just a matter of memorization, not understanding.

Scowling, she says, "I thought we learned in class that one of the causes of the war was alliances." Wow, I'll admit, I'm impressed she remembered that.

"It was. A single country went to war, and then, one by one, so did the others."

She points at the book. "But it says here that-"

"That's also true," I explain. "There was more than just one single cause, but all you need to know is what we learned in class. What's in there isn't going to be on the midterm."

Sakura gapes at me. "Then why are you having me read all this?"

"Well, most of what's in there _will_ be on the exam. There are some things that won't be, though."

"What?" She asks, baffled. "So this is all just a waste of time? Why not just focus on the important stuff?"

I groan. Truth be told, the only reason I'm having her do all this reading is because every time I lean over to explain something to her I can feel how close she is to me and it seriously distracts me. I hate losing my train of thought midway through explaining something to her. It's happened to me before, and each time she looks at me as if to say, 'what's the matter with you?'. Very unpleasant.

"Li!" Sakura waves a hand in front of my face. "Are you even listening to me?"

"Yes, I'm listening." Swatting her hand away, I add, "And would you stop calling me that?"

"What? Li?" She leans back and crosses her arms. "Why? That's your name, isn't it?" Now she's just trying to be difficult.

"You know what I'm talking about. You've called me Syaoran twice now. Why do you keep referring to me as Li when we both know that you only do it when I'm around."

"Twice?"

Shoot, that's right. I somehow forgot that Sakura wasn't awake the first time she called me Syaoran. I still remember it like it was yesterday. From the way her lips moved to form my name, to the smell of cherry blossoms that she emitted, but she doesn't have any memories of it having ever happened.

I debate whether or not to tell her. To heck with it. Why not? Her reaction should be fairly entertaining, anyways. "You weren't awake the first time."

Her face turns red. "W-what? When did you-"

"While you were asleep at my apartment," I explain. "You were unconscious on the couch when you whispered my name in your sleep."

She looks beyond embarrassed by what I've said. "You're kidding, right?" Surely she knows I'm not. I simply give her a what-do-you-think look. She turns away and shields her face so that I can't see her.

"T-that was-" Yep. So worth it. She's even cutter when she stutters. Wait- What the hell am I thinking? Snap out of it, Syaoran! "I was... It just... Gah!" She bends over and I wince a little when her head thumps onto the desk. "Cut me a brake, would ya?"

"What would be the fun in that?" I want to tease her about it more, but in the end decide to drop it. "Whatever, call me what you will, but I get to do the same in turn." She looks up, and I tilt my head to the side and ask as innocently as possible, "That sound fair, Sakura?"

When she speaks again, it's sloppy and slurred. "Fine. Do what you like." I chuckle. I said almost the exact same thing when she first asked me if she could call me Syaoran. Sakura looks back down at the book as if she doesn't really care, but her face tells me otherwise. There's a troubled frown pulling her eyebrows closer together, but the reason why is beyond me. Surely she doesn't mind me calling her Sakura when she already agreed on a truce. Isn't that a bigger deal than this? I'd sure think so, but who knows. More than that- why do I even care?

Leaning forward, I rest my head in the palm of my right hand. "You still want me to go over it with you?" Her nod seems reluctant. Taking a deep breath to calm myself, I lean over and begin my explanation.

* * *

Lunch today is proving to be rather humiliating. You'd think that after telling one of your closest friends that they're wrong about something enough times, they would just leave it alone, but _no_. Ever since I accidentally commented on the fragrance of Sakura's hair yesterday at lunch, Takashi has been all over me about it. After I said it, it took me a minute to realize why Takashi was looking at me like I'd lost my mind. He sat there gawking at me with this insanely amused look on his face. I must have asked him a million times why he was looking at me funny, but every time he would just burst out laughing. Eventually it looked liked he was going to suffocate from not getting enough air. Finally, after what felt like forever, he told me what I'd said, and ever since then he won't leave me alone about it. As if I'm not already embarrassed enough.

It's only Wednesday, too. I've got to put up with this torment for the next two days before the weekend. The weekend; It's what I look forward to most every single week_day_. Over the weekend, so long as I don't check my phone, I don't have a care in the world. Up until I get back to school on Monday and Takashi starts teasing me about it again. Hopefully, with exams going on, he'll forget about it.

"It's kind of adorable, really. You're totally whipped."

I groan and reach both arms up to cover my face while I clutch my hair. "Oh, just shut up already."

Takashi chuckles. "This is way too much fun. You _just_ got her to stop all-out ignoring you, and you're already falling for her again."

There really is no 'again' about it, but I'm not about to tell Takashi that. To admit that there was never a time when I _wasn't_ in love with her would just be asking for him to never leave me alone. "I'm not falling for her."

"Right, you're just going around smelling her hair and obsessing over the color of her eyes." To be fair, I never mentioned anything about her eyes out loud.

"Hey, I'm not doing that intentionally, it just happens when we're sitting so close to each other."

Takashi gives me a firm pat on the shoulder, and I glare at his hand the entire time. "Sure it does, Syaoran. Sure it does." Ugh, this guy. I swear, sometimes I don't know why I'm such good friends with him. When he's not busy filling me up with lies, he's trying to get under my skin. Probably only does that because I typically manage to stay super calm and collected. Either that, or because I always do the same exact thing to him every time he and Chiharu do basically _anything_ together. Those two are so in love, though. The reason they aren't already a couple is beyond me.

"You're impossible." Giving up, I simply turn away and gaze out the window. What are you doing right now, Sakura?

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I arrive home earlier than than usual Thursday night. "I'm home," I call out to no-one in particular.

As I bend over to take off my shoes, something catches my eyes. There are two other pairs of shoes sitting in front of the door. Touya isn't usually home this early, is he? Yet as I recall, those are his shoes. Even if he is, why is are there _two_ pairs?

"Touya?" I step into the house. "Hey, what's with the extra pair of shoes? I didn't know we were expecting-" The words die in my throat as I enter the lounge. No way. "Yukito?" Are my eyes playing tricks on me? Sitting there before me on the couch is a very familiar silver haired figure.

"Long time, no see, Sakura," he says.

Unable to contain myself, I run across the rooms and throw myself at him. I haven't seen Yukito in what feels like forever. Surely it's been at least two or three months. Enveloping him in a bear hug, I ask, "What are you doing here?"

The reply comes from behind me. "I invited him over for dinner as thanks for helping with the job hunt. By the way, you should let go before you crush him, monster." Letting go of the silver haired man, I turn to glare at my obnoxious older brother.

"I am _not_ a monster!"

"Sure you aren't, monster."

I'm about to speak when behind me, a chuckle suddenly emits from deep inside Yukito's throat. Touya and I both turn to him. Catching our stares, he waves his hand and says, "Sorry, sorry. I just really missed watching you two going at it. It's pretty adorable. The two Kinomoto siblings constantly bickering."

Touya sighs. "Yuki," he says in a tone that 'why did you have to say that' tone. Yukito just continues to laugh at our behavior.

Quick to change the subject, I ask Touya, "So, how far along is dinner?"

"Haven't started," he says, sounding all nonchalant.

"What?" I yell, not caring how loud I am. He hasn't even started? "It's already getting late! What are you waiting for?" I don't wait for a reply. "Never mind." Shoving past him, I rush into the kitchen. "Get your butt over here so that we can start." Behind me, Touya begrudgingly follows, grumbling the entire time.

"Do you need help with anything?" Yukito stands in the entrance to the kitchen just behind my abnormally tall brother.

"No, that's alright. We've got this covered; Right, Touya?" I give him a pointed glare.

"Whatever you say, kiddo." I decide to let that one slide. Yukito is still around, and it's no use yelling at him, anyways.

"I really don't mind. The more hands, the quicker it'll get done."

I hesitate, but eventually nod. "Alright. I suppose you can chop the onion for now." I pull out the cutting board and put it on the counter. "Touya, you get the noodles ready. I'll take care of the sauce."

"Somebody's being awful bossy." My attempt to stomp on Touya's foot fails when he dodges the assault with great ease. "And grumpy."

Rolling my eye, I get started with the dinner. All three of us spend the next half hour milling around the kitchen preparing the meal. When we finally finish, I set the table while Yukito and Touya bring out the food. After everything has been set, we sit down. Touya and I take our usual spots across from each other, and Yukito sits beside Touya. The seating arrangement makes me cringe in jealousy. It's really not fair that Touya always gets to sit next to Yukito. They see each other on a weekly basis; Sometimes more. I, on the other hand, only get to see Yukito every few months. It's annoying because he's like another member of the family. A family that consists of just Touya and I. Yukito has always been here, so I try to make the best of the few times that I _do_ get to see him.

Not wanting to waste any of the time I have with him, I ask the silver haired boy in front of me, "So, how is the internship going, Yukito?"

"Good. The people are nice, and the work interesting. If the job I actually get ends up being anything like what I'm doing now, I think I'll be just fine there. But enough about that, how is school going?" He takes another bite.

I struggle for something to say. So much has happened in the past few weeks that I don't even know where to start. I'd consider mentioning Syaoran, but Touya is sitting with us. What else is there to talk about? Mental slap. How can I even think that? There's plenty more than just Syaoran. What about... Chiharu! That's right, and then there's Naoko, too.

"Well, I've actually been making a few new friends at school." The words sound childish as I say them. You always hear about parents telling their kids to go out and make new friends. Although, I only ever heard that a few times. Not wanting to sound like a child, I add, "There's a girl who I eat lunch with sometimes who is really nice, and also someone who I meet with in the library sometimes."

"It's another girl, right?" Touya asks with a mouthful of food.

I glare at him. "Yes, you overprotective-" I manage to stop myself before I say something that I regret. Taking a deep breath, I calmly clarify. "It is a girl."

Touya returns my glare, but nods in approval. "Good."

Yukito nervously laughs. "So, you're enjoying senior year then, right?"

I nod. "I mean, midterms are going to be a drag, but, other than that, it's alright."

"That's good to hear." With all the food gone from his plate, Yukito sets down his chopsticks. "I hardly ever see you anymore; It makes me worry."

I feel my heart warm at his words. Yukito is so kind. "I appreciate your concern, but I'm fine," I assure him.

Suddenly the phone rings, bringing an end to the conversation. "Geez, who's calling at this hour?" Touya stands up and walks over to the landline. "Kinomoto residence," he says into the phone.

When the person on the other end speaks, Touya's expression becomes warped. His entire body goes rigid, and his face turns into one of surprise. As the person goes on, the surprise gives way to fury. There's a moment of silence in which I slowly see Touya's face grow darker and darker. I glance back at Yukito and we exchange a look of concern. What's going on?

"Alright, thank you, we'll be right there." The phone slams back down onto the stand. Touya just stands there glaring it until finally he raises one of his arms high above his head. I watch it, having no idea what to expect. Then he brings it down with such force that when it hits the landline, it sends a loud bang echoing through the household. Yukito and I both flinch.

Behind me, Yukito jumps to his feet. "Touya," he says, sounding concerned.

"What's going on?" I demand, my voice shaky.

Touya's fiery eyes never once leave the now broken phone as he says, "That was the police station." Time itself seems to freeze. "Dad's in jail."

* * *

**Muahahahahahaha! I gave you all a cliffhanger. This chapter was so annoying to write. Mainly because it's late and totally rushed. Speaking of which, seeing how I keep on updating on Sunday anyways, I've decided to switch the updates from every Saturday to just anytime during the weekend.**

**By the way, once this chapter is up, I'll be officially at 50k+ words! It's so exciting! Well, for me it is. For all of you it just means that you've read a lot. And this probably isn't even halfway over, so expect to be reading a lot more.**


	13. It All Comes Crumbling Down

**Ha! I made it! Technically, it's still Sunday... Or at least it is where I am. If you're in the Eastern Hemisphere, then it's Monday. I've still got like 40 minutes before midnight. Totally cutting it close... Wow... I am _so_ tired right now. Anyways, I finished editing it a few minutes ago, so here it is.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

To say that the car ride to the police station is tense would be a drastic understatement. Touya doesn't say anything, but I can _feel_ the emotions radiating from him. Disgust, hatred, resentment, disappointment; All those things, but more than any, I can feel the betrayal.

Personally, I don't know what to think. It just feels so surreal. Can this really be happening? Am I really sitting in Yukito's car on my way to see my dad in _prison_? Sure, he's done a lot of stupid shit in the past, but he's never gone to _jail_. I'm wracking my brain for the possible things he could've done, but am coming up short. Touya might know, but, quite frankly, I'm to scared to ask him.

It feels like we've been driving forever. The silence is crushing me. My shoulders are heavy, and my breaths are raspy and uneven. This feeling of suffocation is so familiar, yet I haven't felt it this strong in years. When mom died, we were already there at the hospital with her. It was the car ride back to the house that was unbearable. Nobody spoke back then, either. There was nothing but silence. Dad didn't even cry, and I predict that it was because he was in shock. A pretty flimsy prediction, considering we knew for over a year, but it's the best I could come up with. Right now _I'm_ the one in shock. Shock and denial.

Seeing the police station come into view sure sobers me up, though. It grows nearer and nearer, and all I want to do is sink down in my seat. The fact that we've come to a stop doesn't even register until the sound of a door slamming shut makes me jump. I watch from inside the car, dazed, as Touya marches up to the glass doors and shoves one of them aside. The driver's door opens and Yukito steps out. His door shuts quietly, and seconds later mine opens. The cold autumn breeze rushes into the car and chills me to the bone. My eyes rest on my lap as Yukito stands outside and waits for me.

"Do you want to wait here?" He asks. I want to say yes. I want nothing more than to pretend that this isn't happening. Can't we just go back to our blissful dinner at home. It felt so normal. So natural, as if, for once, we were an actual family again. Eating dinner together like any other family, and talking about normal things like school and work. I want that more than anything, but it just isn't my life. So, with tremendous effort, I unbuckle the seatbelt and step out of the vehicle.

As my foot touches the ground outside the car, I can just barely make out my shadow. The sun already set, so the only thing illuminating the parking lot in front of the station are the lights from the building and nearby street lights. I step forward very slowly. My body feels like a deadweight. Thousand pound legs lift off the ground and make small, strenuous steps towards the building. Even though the police station doesn't look menacing from the outside, something about it make me want to withdraw myself into a dark corner and curl up tight in a ball. But I don't. Instead, I fight back the urge and take another step.

We arrive at the set of glass doors all too fast. Yukito, being the gentleman he is, steps forward and holds the door open for me, waiting just inside. I take a deep breath before passing through the threshold into the building.

Inside, Touya stands at the front desk speaking to one of the officers. Even though his voice is calm and in control, I can tell it's strained. I hang back my the door while Yukito steps forward. The officer behind the counter spins in his chair to say something to another officer, and while he's turned away, Yukito places a hand on Touya's shoulder and speaks to him in a hushed voice. When the man looks back, Yukito pulls his hand away and turns his attention to the officer.

Throughout the entire exchange, I am unable to move. I stand just inside the door with my arms snaked around my body. What does this mean for us? I can't imagine dad ever doing anything that would result in him going to jail. What if it was serious? He couldn't have hurt anyone; That much I'm sure of.

Why? Why is this happening? Why now? Why now, after seven years, is something finally happening?

"Sakura."

After this what will happen? Will dad still be able to come home with us?

"Sakura."

Even if whatever he did wasn't that severe, would they just let him walk out? Contrary to our lifestyle, we need him there. Dad is still my legal guardian until I reach eighteen. If he isn't released, will that make Touya my guardian?

"Sakura!" Huh?

Touya stands in front of me with his hands on my shoulders like he's shaking me awake. Beside him, Yukito watches me with concerned eyes.

"What?" Touya glances at Yukito. "What did they say?"

Touya's hands fall from my shoulders. "Apparently while he was drunk he stumbled into some high-end department store and passed out. Someone called the cops and they had to go and get him out of the store." That's it? I sigh. "He's in a holding cell right now."

"Well that's a relief. Did the store press charges?"

"Surprisingly, no. If they had, we would probably have to go through a whole lawsuit." Who knew that for once we would actually get so lucky.

"So, he'll be allowed to come home with us, right?"

Touya frowns. "Once he sobers up, yeah. Until then, I have to fill out some paperwork. It'll be a while, so you head back to the house with Yuki."

"What? No way!" How could he even suggest that? I'm not about to abandon him here in a police station. Not him, _or_ our father. Who knows when he'll wake up? It could be anytime. "I'm not going anywhere," I insist.

Touya's eyes soften. "Sakura," he says sounding desperate. "I don't know how long this is going to take, and you still have school tomorrow." School? Our father is detained in a police station, and he's worried about _school_?

"You want me to leave because I have _school_? This is way more important than that!"

Now I can see that he's getting irritated by my resistance. "School _is_ important. Now, you're going to get back in that car with Yuki and go home to get some rest. If anything changes, I'll call."

"How dare you?" I snap. "You can't just boss me around like this, Touya!"

"Oh, you wanna bet?" Why that little-

"Sakura," Yukito says, gently reaching out to touch me. I quickly slip by before he can, though. Damn it! This is so unfair! I know that there's nothing I can say to make Touya change his mind, so I angrily run out of the police station and back to the car where I'm finally able to catch my breath. My lungs scream for air as I heave in attempt to get enough oxygen to stop the flow of tears threatening to spill.

I don't want to fight with Touya like this. It _kills_ me to argue with him in such a serious way. He's the only family I have left. Without him, I'm nobody. Without Touya, I'm just some girl with no family left to rely on.

* * *

**Touya's POV**

I watch her leave. It pains me to see her walk away from me, but it has to be done. Sakura can't let something like this distract her, especially not now with her midterms less than three days away.

Trying not to let the look on her face haunt me, I turn to Yuki. "Will you stay with her tonight and make sure she goes to school tomorrow morning?"

"Of course." My silver haired friend agrees, then frowns. "But how are you going to get home?"

"Call a taxi, I suppose." I glance over my shoulder to where the officers sit behind the counter filling out paperwork and sigh. "I don't know how long this is going to take, but it'll probably be a while. With Sakura still a minor and dad her legal guardian, I doubt they'll just let him walk out of here without some sort of questioning."

"I know." He sighs and looks out the glass door to the car. "I'm worried about her, you know. Even after everything he's done, Sakura still loves her father."

"Yeah." I follow his gaze. "I'll never understand why she can still care for him so much. She's way too forgiving towards him, if you ask me."

Yuki gives me a meek smile. "He _is_ her father, Touya."

"He's done a pretty shitty job at earning that title."

"Touya."

"Enough with the sympathetic tone, Yuki." My voice is harsh. I'm losing my cool. _Yuki hasn't done anything wrong_, I remind myself. Taking a deep breath, I turn to him and say, "Just watch over her for me, okay?" From the corner of my eye I can see him study me. After a moment, he nods and exits the station. I watch the car as it pulls away, and once it's out of sight, I turn back to the front counter. This is going to be one long night.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

What the hell is the matter with her? How can she do this on our last day? Talk about poor timing. It's half an hour into tutoring, and I'm getting tired of waiting. Taking matters into my own hands, I decide to go to her house to again and find out the reason for this sudden and very untimely rebellion. I don't remember doing anything to set her off this time, and even if I did, why wouldn't she have just told me? Then again, this is Sakura I'm talking about.

Arriving at her house I know something strange is going on right away because of the unfamiliar vehicle in her driveway. It's not like I come to her house enough to know if it's here often, but it can't be her brother's since it wasn't here the last time I stopped by.

Walking alongside it, I see that in the front, hanging from the rearview mirror, is a small handmade doll. It's a plush replica of a boy in a school uniform with gray felt hair. For some reason it kind of reminds me of someone, but I can't put my finger on it.

Shrugging off the feeling, I head up to the door. Alright, here we go. I press the doorbell. Within ten seconds, the door opens at a steady and controlled pace. Behind it, a man with short, silver hair stands holding a long wooden spoon. I get a feeling of deja vu from just looking at him. Something tells me that I should know who this is.

"Can I help you?" Even his voice seems vaguely familiar.

Shoving aside the feeling, I say, "Yeah. I'm looking for Sakura; Is she here?"

The man assesses me. "She is. Why are you looking for her?" Here I thought that she only had one brother.

"I'm her tutor. She was supposed to show up at school over half an hour ago for a lesson. It's kinda important, so..." I trail off, hoping he picks up on my vibes.

Thankfully, he says, "Alright, I'll go get her. You can sit in the living room while you wait." I enter the house and follow the man down the hall as he leads me to the living room. If we've ever met before, he's not showing any sign of remembering it. As he leaves me in the living room to get Sakura, I study my surroundings.

I was just in the Kinomoto household a week ago, but everything happened so fast that I never really got a chance to look around. Th place hasn't changed much, as far as I can tell. The furniture is all the same and the walls don't appear to have been painted. The atmosphere, however, has drastically shifted. Sakura's house was always bright and welcoming while her mother was alive, but it feels much darker now.

On the end table, something catches my eye. I stand up and walk over to it. As I grow nearer, I can see it's a picture frame that has been laid face down. Unable to stop myself, I reach out and pick it up. Memories from the past hit me like a wave. I've seen this picture before. It's been some time, but it's defiantly the same photo.

The image in my hand is of the four Kinomotos at the beach. It was taken the summer before Sakura's mom was diagnosed with cancer. Sakura came back from the vacation and showed me the picture as she told me tales of how Touya stole her ice cream and she got lost in one of the food markets. Everyone in the photo has a bright smile on their face. Back then, no one ever suspected that there was anything wrong. But, then again, why would they? Sakura's mother was always an energetic woman. I didn't know her very well myself, but whenever I came over to see Sakura, she would always greet me with a smile and bring Sakura and I snacks while we played together. Thinking back to those carefree times gives me a sense of nostalgia.

Hearing footsteps behind me, I quickly put down the picture. I turn around just in time to see Sakura enter the room, still wearing pink pajamas. The look on her face tells me that we're both equally surprised by the other.

"Li?" Her voice is thick from having just woken up. "What are you doing here?"

Good question. Why _am_ I here? Seeing that photo- not to mention Sakura in pajamas- has really got my head in the clouds. Before I came to Sakura's house, I was... Oh, that's right. "You didn't show up to tutoring again, and since it's our last day, I didn't want you to miss the lesson."

"Oh," she grumbles and shuffles over to the sofa where she collapses.

"Yeah. What are you still doing here, anyways? Are you sick or something?"

"No," she says, her eyes only half open and not even looking at me.

She doesn't go on, so I inquire, "Then why didn't you come to school?"

Finally she looks at me and glares. "I'm tired and waiting for someone. I can't leave the house until they get back."

"Um." What the heck is with her vague answers? Is she coming to school or not? "So are you going to be coming to school today?"

"Probably not." I just stare at her. Probably? What the heck does she mean, '_probably_'? There's only half an our- well, less by now- before school starts. This girl needs to get her act together. She can't afford to miss classes this close to midterms.

"Oh yes you are." Wait. What? Did I just say that? The sound of footsteps draws my attention to the doorway. In walks the man from earlier who answered the door. "Your brother told me specifically to send you off to school, so you're going."

Now Sakura looks wide awake. "But, Yukito, what if they get back while I'm gone? Touya is probably going to be super cranky, and I don't want him taking it out on dad."

I have no idea what's going on, but I can tell from their faces that it's not something good. The mention of Sakura's father makes me tense. I've heard the rumors at school about how after Sakura's mom died, her father started drinking. Takashi has told me a few things about the whole entire family situation, but we don't really talk about it much. It's a rather touchy subject for all of us, so we typically avoid it.

"Sakura, I know this is hard for you, but you can't just put your life on hold because of it."

"Still!" The man, Yukito, steps forward and kneels down before Sakura, who, in turn, shuts her mouth.

"Look, Sakura, I'm going to stay here and wait for them; Alright? When Touya gets back, I'll make sure he doesn't do anything rash, so you just focus on school. Your dad and Touya will still be here when you get back."

Sakura just sits there defiantly with her arms crossed and her head turned. Eventually, though, she sighs and faces him once more.

"Fine." It's all she says before standing up and vanishing through the doorway.

With Sakura now out of the room, the man named Yukito stands up and faces me. "Sorry about that."

I shake my head. "It's fine. Is everything alright, though."

He hesitates. "More or less. I'm sorry, you'll have to ask Sakura herself for the details. I doubt she wants a lot of people to know." Ignoring my spiked curiosity, I nod respectfully.

I take another moment to study the man before finally asking, "I'm sorry, but do I know you? You look oddly familiar, yet I can't seem to place it."

"You too? In truth, I though there was something about your eyes that I'd seen before. I'm Tsukishiro Yukito. Touya and I have been friends for years."

Tsukishiro Yukito? Then it clicks. Back when Sakura and I still spoke on a regular basis, I would sometimes see her brother, Touya, too. Tsukishiro was the name of the boy who was almost always with Touya. We only ever spoke a few times when we went to festivals together or had dinner with the Kinomoto's at the same time.

"Oh, that's right. You're the one who was always with Sakura's older brother."

Tsukishiro tilts his head to the side. "That would've been me, but who are you?"

"Li Syaoran," I say slowly, unsure of how he'll react.

"Oh," he says. After a few seconds, there's a much longer, "Oh." I assume that he knows the story about how I left Sakura just before her mom passed away. Not exactly the sort of lasting impression I would like to have.

"Yeah. I take it you know about what happened."

"Well," he uncomfortably shifts his weight from one foot to the other, "yes. Touya didn't take to kindly to your departure. Neither did Sakura, of course. I didn't know that you ever came back to Japan, though." There's an awkward silence, then he says, "So, you're Sakura's tutor now?"

"Yeah." I nod. "It's kinda a long story, but, basically, our teacher wants her to pass all her midterms, so he tasked me with the job."

"Hm. Well, I wish the two of you the best of luck." The smile he breaks out in makes me relax a bit.

Seconds later Sakura reappears in the doorway wearing her school uniform. "Alright, I'm ready." Her eyes land on me. "You're still here? Come on, let's go." Wow, she's bossy. She should really work on her people skills.

* * *

"Are you going to tell me what's going on?" We're already halfway to school and yet she hasn't said a single word since we left the house. It's kind of unsettling.

"No," she states irritably.

"Okay," I say slowly. "Will you at least tell me why you never showed up to tutoring when this is the _last_ lesson before midterms?"

"It's not high on my list of priorities."

"Not high on your-" Oh this girl. "You do realize that if you don't pass all of them, we have to keep on doing this, right?"

"For crying out loud- who cares?" Um, I do. "It's not like Mr. Terada checks up on us or anything."

"Your grades should be proof enough."

"That's just great, isn't it? Aren't you the smart one." Geez, when did she get so cranky. Her sarcasm isn't appreciated. "I should just drop out, then." Her words make me stop in my tracks. Did I hear her right?

"What?"

Seeing that I've come to a halt, she turns around to face me. "You heard me. It's not like it matters, anyways."

"What do you mean it doesn't _matter_?"

She continues on as if I never said anything. "Touya dropped out, so why the heck do I have to keep on going?" Wow. Information overload. Touya as in her brother? He dropped out? How am I only just now hearing about this? "Besides, it's not like graduating will do me any good." Wow, now she's taking this to a whole new level.

"Hey!" She flinches, but doesn't look at me. "Sakura!" Trying not to be too rough, I take her shoulders and turn her to face me once more. With her arms crossed, she glances at me, sees I'm watching her, and looks away again. "What in the world has gotten into you?"

With a sigh, she shrugs me off. "I'm just really pissed off right now."

"Even so, for you to be talking like that-"

"It's true, though, you know." She looks me straight in the eyes. "Graduating isn't going to do me any good."

"What are you talking about, Sakura?"

"College, Li. Even if I do graduate, there's no way any college is ever going to accept someone with my kind of grades. Not that it even matters; I can't afford it anyways." Oh. So that's what this is about. She thinks that just because her chances of ever going to college are slim to none, that she can just drop out of high school. Sure, I can see why she would think something like that right now, but in reality it's a load of crap.

"Seriously, Sakura? You want to drop out of high school midway through your senior year because you think you won't go to _college_?"

"There is no 'think' about it, I'm not going. Unless I suddenly become a genius overnight and win the lottery, it's not going to happen."

"Okay, you're not going to college. So what? Who cares? That's no reason to just give up on graduating high school. It's not just about getting into college afterwards, Sakura." I don't even know how to put into words for her how important this is.

"Look, I'm sorry I ever brought it up." She turns away. "I didn't mean to snap at you like that. Just... Pretend I never said anything." I watch, wanting to say something as she starts to walk away, but keeping my mouth shut. What can I possibly say to her to convince her that what she's saying is all wrong? She wouldn't listen to me, anyways. I can't say anything to her right now to convince her, but there's one thing I know for sure. Sakura is going to graduate. I'll make sure of it, even if it means tutoring her every single morning for the rest of the school year.

* * *

**Alright, if any of you looked at my profile, I said that this was probably going to have Tomoyo's POV, too, but as you can see, it doesn't. My reasoning? I thought of a much better spot to add what I was going to have happen with her. Hehehehehehe. I'm excited for that. Anyways, I'm about to fall asleep, so I should probably be going now. Good night to those of you who, for some reason, are still awake.**


	14. Back to Syao-kun's

**Chapter 14 is here! First of all, sorry I'm late. Thankfully, I'm not going to be busy again any time soon, so it shouldn't happen again.**

**Before you start reading, I wanted to let everyone know that this chapter was inspired by a comment from Khiyo Gizele, one of my faithful readers. It was originally going to span over the entire weekend, but it was getting too long, and I didn't have time to finish writing it, so I decided to split it up into two. More about that after you've read the chapter.**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I wake up Saturday morning to the sound of banging. Very lazily, my head picks up off the pillow and glares at the bedroom door. "Shut up!" Two words and I feel like I've run a mile.

"I'm about to head out, so it's time for you to get up."

"Go away."

"No; get up."

"Ugh." Groaning, I swing one arm over the side of the bed. You've got this, Sakura. Very tactfully, I crawl forward on two arms until the rest of me slowly falls to the floor. There's a thump as my feet hit the wooden bed frame on the way down. _Ow_, much?

"What are you doing in there?"

"Getting up like you told me to." Stupid Touya. I have to crawl over to the door. Why is the doorknob so far away?

Before I can even attempt to reach up, the door swings open and Touya towers over me with an amused look. "Having some trouble there?"

"Remind me to hit you over the head when you get back from work."

"Whatever you say, little monster." He turns and walks down the hall before I can lung myself at is legs. Delaying the inevitable, I see. I'll get you sooner or later, Touya. Best be watching your back.

* * *

Ten minutes later, I'm downstairs, laying on the couch with my legs dangling over the end. Touya's footsteps and the sound of jingling keys makes me look up. "Alright, I'm about to head out."

"'Kay." I close my eyes again.

When I don't hear him move, I look again. Touya stands in the doorway looking down the hall at something. "So, you're going to stay here with him?" He must be looking at the door to the study. By the time I got home yesterday, Touya and dad had already been here for quite a while. Apparently as soon as they got back, dad locked himself in the study. He hasn't been out since; or at least not that I've seen.

"What else _can_ I do? Mrs. Matsumoto told Chiharu and I that we're on mandatory leave until midterms are over.

Touya shakes his head. "Alright, just be sure to study." I nod. Sure, I'll _try_ to study, but odds are I won't get much done. As he's about to leave, Touya swings his head back into the room and says, "By the way, you don't have to stay here. You can call up that tutor of yours if you want." I _may_ have told him that my tutor was a girl. But, in my defense, if I hadn't, he never would have let me go in the first place. And if he knew it was _Syaoran_ of all people... Well, that wouldn't roll over too well.

"Okay, Touya. I'll think about it."

* * *

Two hours later I'm on the phone dialing Syaoran's number. I tried to sit down and study by myself, but it didn't turn out too well. After missing most of yesterday's lesson, I figure now is as good of a time as any to make it up. Although, for all I know he might not be home. Even if he is, I doubt he'll want to spend the weekend tutoring me. Maybe I should just-

"Hello, Li residence." Too late. The voice on the other end doesn't belong to Syaoran, much to my relief; It's older and more raspy.

"H-hi, this is Sakura Kinomoto. Um, is Syaoran there?"

"Miss Kinomoto?" Wait a minute… That voice…

"Wei-san?" I'm grinning ear to ear.

"It's good to hear from you, young miss. After the young master brought you back to the house unconscious, I was terribly worried. Are you doing well?"

"Yes, I am; thank you for your concern."

"Of course. What was it you said about Syaoran-sama?"

"Oh, right. Is he there?"

"He is. Just got out of the shower, I believe." The thought of Syaoran coming out of a shower with nothing but a towel on turns my face bright red. "Would you like me to put him on?"

"Yes, please." No turning back now. You can do this, Sakura.

"Alright, it'll be just a moment." There's silence on the other end and I shift my weight uncomfortable while I wait.

"Hello?" Syaoran's voice makes me grab the counter for support. Damn it, I shouldn't have called. "Hello?" he repeats.

"Um, hi," I choke out. Clearly I can't do this.

"Sakura? Is that you?"

"Yeah," I say slowly, but nothing else.

"So, did you need something?"

"Er, yes... So, you know how yesterday we didn't really get to finish the lesson because I wasn't there for most of it?"

"Of course. You totally set us back. It was the _last_ lesson."

"Yeah, sorry about that. Anyways, I, well, I'm not really doing anything right now, so- if you aren't busy- I was wondering if maybe-"

"You wanna finish the lesson _today_?"

"I know that it sounds a little strange, but I just figured-"

"Oh, no, not at all." There's rummaging on the other end. He sure agreed to that quickly. "Now we can finish up that review." There's a pause. "Do you want me to come over there, or-"

"No!" I say, a little too quickly. "I mean, it's just that Touya doesn't exactly know that you're the one tutoring me, so..."

"Oh, say no more. If not there, then do you want to come over here, or meet up somewhere."

"Actually, do you mind if I come over?" Before he gets the wrong idea, I say, "I spoke to Wei on the phone and, if it's not too much trouble, I'd like to say hi."

"Sure, it's no trouble. When do you think you'll be coming? Do you want me to have Wei pick you up?"

"Nah, I can walk. Does an hour from now work?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, see you then." I quickly hang up before he can reply. That was way too stressful. Pressing my hand over my heart, I can feel it pounding against my ribcage. "Damn it," I curse. "Get a hold of yourself."

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

When Wei came into my room and told me that I had a call, my first thought was that it was my mother checking in on me; so when Sakura's voice came through the other end, I more or less had a heart attack. Now she's coming over for tutoring. And it was _her_ idea. I never would've thought this possible, but with Wei straightening up the house for her arrival, I can tell I must not have imagined the conversation.

I'm freaking out right now! _Sakura_ is coming over to my _apartment_ to study. Usually we work in the library which is a nice, neutral location. My house isn't a exactly a 'nice, neutral location'. Should've suggested the public library while I had the chance. Although, she wants to see Wei, so it's kind of unavoidable.

The sound of the doorbell nearly gives me a heart attack. "I've got it," I call to Wei.

The door swings open. On the other side, Sakura drops her hands from tugging at the bottom of her forest green blouse and looks up at me. Wow. It's been forever since I saw her in normal dat-to-day clothes. It's not that she doesn't look good in the school uniform, but the way her shirt brings out her eyes is absolutely hypnotizing.

"Hi," she says slowly. I bringing my gaze back up to meet hers.

"Yeah, hi." My body moves away from the door to let her through. "Come on in."

"Thanks." Inside, she puts a hand on the wall and takes her shoes off one at a time.

As we enter the main room, I ask, "So, what brought on the sudden urge to study?"

After glancing around, Sakura faces me. "Well, I felt a little bad about totally ditching you yesterday." Her face scrunches up as she says, "That, and my stomach keeps on sinking whenever I think about all the exams."

"Nerves getting to you?"

"A bit."

"Well then, we should probably get started. I'll go grab the books." I head off down the hall while Sakura takes a seat on the couch. Re-entering the living room, I say, "If you want we can start with math, since that's where you need the most work, or we could go over-"

"Miss Kinomoto?"

"Wei-san?" I look up in time to see Sakura jump up off the couch and throw herself at my butler who just entered the room. The poor old man nearly falls over from the force.

"S-Sakura?" What on earth has gotten into her? Sakura turns her head to the side and sticks her tongue out at me like a child. What the-

"It's nice to see you, young miss." The gray haired man chuckles.

"Nice to see you, too." She pulls back. "How have you been? Syao-kun hasn't been overworking you, has he?" I think I need to get my ears checked. Did she just call me, 'Syao-kun'? Shivers.

"What did you just call me?" I ask in disbelief.

Wei laughs at the joke. "Not at all, young miss."

"Good, but if he does, just let me know. I'll beat him up for ya." She says it with a goofy grin on her face; meanwhile, I just stand and gawk at her.

"_You'll_ beat _me_ up?" Did she forget that I'm a martial artist? The comment earns me a glare.

"I'll keep that in mind," Wei says with a smile. "Well, I'll let the two of you get to your studying then. Expect tea in a little bit." With that, Wei exits the room.

When he's out of earshot, I ask, "Did you just call me," my face scrunches up in disgust, "Syao-kun?"

An amused smile tugs at her lips as she walks over to me. I nearly jump out of my skin when she reaches up and puts her hand down on top of my head. "You bet I did, Syao-kun." Ugh. What the hell? Why is she talking to me like I'm a puppy? "Didn't I, Syao-kun?" Her hand roughly moves around on top of my head. "Didn't I?" She sounds out every syllable. I can feel my hair being tousled every which way. It's already hard enough to brush; why is she doing this to me? I glare at her with hunched shoulders and hands balled up in fists.

"What the hell, Sakura?"

She feigns a gasp and slaps the side of my head. Okay, now that was just rude. "Bad, Syao-kun," she fake scolds me. "Watch your mouth."

What? Is she for real? She's just as bad! "You're one to talk." Finally, unable to stand it anymore, I grab her wrist and pull it between us. "What in the world has gotten into you?"

"What do you mean?" Playing innocent, I see.

"I _mean_ last week you were still calling me Li, and now you're giving me a pet name." And treating me like one.

"Syao-kun has always been your nickname," she states as if I should already know this.

"What... No it hasn't!"

"Yes it has. I just never called you it to your face because you would've freaked out. Kinda like you're doing right now." Ugh; this girl. "And don't get me wrong, you're still Li, but if you can call me Sakura to my face, then I can refer to you as Syao-kun when talking to Wei-san." If I had a free hand, I would slap the front of my face with the palm of my hand.

Suddenly, there's a tug as Sakura pulls her arm away from me. "Do me a favor; let go."

"Happy to oblige." I uncurl my fingers from her wrist.

"Good, now let's get started, shall we?" She reaches out and takes the books from my arm before I can object.

"Wonderful," I mumble sarcastically. "Off to work with the princess of mood swings."

"You say something?"

"Who: me? Of course not." If there's one thing I learned from growing up in a house with five women, it's not to comment on their behavior; no matter how crazy it may seem.

Sakura falls back onto the couch and drops the books onto the table at the exact same time. Staring at the pile of books in dread, she says, "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea."

"It was _your's _to begin with."

"I know. It seemed good a the time, but now- not so much."

I sit down next to her. "It'll be good practice." Out of the corner of my eye I can see her fidgeting, so I look at her and ask, "What?"

"It's just- Do you mind?" Mind what? She leans slightly away and watches me uncomfortably. What is she doing?

"No." It comes out as more of a question rather than a statement.

"Then would you move, please?" I look down. There's a good six inches between us. What's she so uptight about?

"No." I sigh in irritation and grab her arm when she tries to move. She doesn't make another attempt to relocate, but I can see the look of longing she casts upon the empty space beside her. "I don't bite."

"I know, but..."

"But nothing. Let's get to work."

* * *

The second I close the book, Sakura jumps up. "Well, this has been productive, but I think it's time we call it a day."

She's been anxious to 'call it a day' ever since I sat down next to her on the couch. I almost felt a little bad about keeping her there. She was clearly uncomfortable, since every time I would lean to close to her, she would stiffen up. It kind of bothered me. Am I really that bad to be around? It was her idea to do this.

"If we're done, then I'll walk you home."

"What?" She spins around. "Why?"

Geez, no need to seem so horrified. "We've been at it for hours. It's getting late and the sun is going down. If you don't mind, I'd rather you not walk home alone."

"Oh. Um, alright."

"Great." I stand up and glance over my shoulder at the kitchen. "Give me a minute; okay?" Sakura nods, and I slip past the couch and down the hall into the kitchen.

"Wei." The gray-haired man turns around. "I'm going to walk Sakura home, so I'll be gone for a little bit."

"Now? Would she like to stay for dinner?"

"I don't think so. She seems to be in a bit of a hurry."

"I see," Wei says, sounding disappointed. It's nice how well the two of them get along. Although, it makes _me_ seem like the bad guy that they haven't been able to speak for the past seven years. But I'm always the bad guy when it comes to just about anything Sakura related. "Do you know if she'll be back again tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow?" The thought hadn't even occurred to me. "Wasn't planning on it. Why?"

"It's just nice to see Sakura-sama again after all of this time. She's grown into quite the beautiful young lady, hasn't she?" He gives me one of those looks, but I simply roll my eyes.

"Yes, she has." A fact that I'm all too aware of. "And something tells me that getting to see her isn't the only thing on your mind."

Wei chuckles. "You're right as usual, Syaoran-sama. It's not just me who enjoys having her around." Oh great, here we go. "You've changed ever since this tutoring started. It used to be nearly impossible to get you to smile, but just the other day, you came back home smiling brighter than I've seen you smile in years." He must be talking about the day that Sakura agreed to give me a second chance. I came home and Wei looked at me as though he was seeing an alien species land on Earth.

"I think you're exaggerating just a bit there."

"Am I?" For an old man, he sure can be cunning. "I've seen that bear you keep on your desk." Darn it. Do I need to hide that or something? "You never did stop loving her, did you?"

At his words, my heart jumps, and I quickly look down the hall to make sure Sakura is nowhere in sight. "For crying out loud, Wei; she's still in the house, you know."

Lightheartedly, he says, "Forgive me, Syaoran-sama. It's hard to miss, though. Your face brightens whenever she's in the room. Ah, to be young and in love."

"You make it sound like I'm some lovesick teenage girl."

He simply chuckles again. "I mean it in the best of ways."

"I know you do, Wei." I glance back to the entrance to the kitchen. "She's still waiting for me, so I should probably go. I'll be back in a bit." With a wave, I head back into the living room.

My eyes automatically search the room for Sakura's green shirt. They find her admiring one of the paintings on the wall. I'm about to speak when something stops me in my tracks. Whether it's the intense look of interest on her face, or the realization of how beautiful she looks while observing it, I don't know for sure. All I know for sure is that I can't look away.

I don't know how much time has passed when Sakura realizes that I'm in the room. She just suddenly blinks and turns to me. "Oh, I didn't hear you." She glances back at the painting one last time before walking up to me. "Are you ready?" I know what she's saying, but I can't seem to form a response. My silence earns me a concerned look from Sakura.

"Li?" Her eyes are so green.

"Li." I would stare into them forever if she'd let me.

"Li." Her voice drags on out the 'i' sound. The way her lips part shows her bright white teeth.

"Li!" It's adorable when she gets that annoyed little pout on her face.

"Syaoran!" It's like a smack to the face. I abruptly pull back from the fingers that just snapped in front of my face.

"What?" Sakura watches me with troubled eyes.

"You totally just spaced out. Are you okay?"

Talk about embarrassing. "Yeah. Sorry about that; I'm fine." Fine and trying to shrug off the fact that I just got lost in her presence. "Let's get going, then."

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

_Achoo_! "Stupid autumn," I grumble.

"You cold?" Next to me, Syaoran leans over to see my face.

"N-no. Not at all." Lies. I'm full of lies. Before he can say anything, I ask, "So, will I get to see Wei again? If he ever drove you to school, I'd get to say hi, but he doesn't."

"He offers, but I always turn him down."

"What?" I stare at him in disbelief. "Why?"

"I prefer walking. It's good excursive." Damn physically fit rich kids. If he weren't standing right next to me, I'd be mocking him right now. "Actually, now that you've mentioned it, I wanted to ask you..." He pauses, so I give him a nod of encouragement. Just spit it out. "Do you want to come over again tomorrow?"

"Huh?"

"You know; to study. Exams are Monday, and we're probably both going to be studying anyways. Why not just do it at the same time?"

Because the more time I spend with you, the more I can feel myself losing myself again. Can't say that, so I decide to go with, "Won't I just be in your way?"

"Not at all. Teaching you is also really good practice for me." Of course it is.

"Um, alright then," I reluctantly agree. "When should I come over, then?"

"Whenever. I usually get up and train at six." Six? Like, six in the morning? What's _wrong_ with him? "Then I eat and shower. Usually I finish with all of that around eight, so pretty much any time after that. Do you have a preference?"

"No. Not really." I don't even wake up until eight. "Is nine alright, then?"

"Yeah. Do you want to walk again, or should I send Wei this time?"

"I can walk. Besides, I'd prefer to be as on the down low as possible. No offense."

"None taken."

Out of nowhere, the breeze picks up, sending shivers down my spine. _Achoo_! Great. Yet another sneeze.

"That's the second time since we left." Why is he counting? "Here." Syaoran pulls off his jacket and hands it to me. "Put this on. It's not much, but it's better than nothing."

I almost object, but then change my mind, taking the jacket form his arms. "Thank you." I pull it on. The jacket is a bit large, but in a good way. When I bring my arms to my sides, the sleeves go down and stop just above my fingertips. Feeling bold, I shrug my arms even farther into the jacket, and swing so that the sleeves of the jacket hit Syaoran in the arm.

When I do it, Syaoran looks, sees what I'm up to and cracks a smile. "What are you doing?" He chuckles.

"Attacking you with your very own jacket." I don't know, to be honest. The only thing I _do_ know is that this is fun. Being with Syaoran and not having a care in the world. I feel like a kid again; which is perhaps the most terrifying part of all this, because my time with him is almost up. I built walls around myself specifically so that this wouldn't happen. How does he do this? Why does he have to make me feel so happy whenever I'm around him. It isn't fair... But for some reason, I couldn't care less.

* * *

**This one was fun to write. Took a while, but worth it in my opinion.**

**So, in regards to the second part of this a.k.a. the second part of S&amp;S's study weekend, since it's meant to be with this, and I updated this late, I've decided to post next chapter early. By early, I mean I'll be posting it sometime Wednesday. Most likely late afternoon. It's still a work in progress, but it has a lot more character development and all that other boring stuff made fun.**

**Again, sorry that this was late. Hope to see you all Wednesday.**


	15. Hands on Glass Realign

**Yay! Love this chapter. It took like twice as long as I thought it would to edit, but hey *Grins* it's still on time. Not to mention, I think you all will really enjoy the way this chapter ends. Enough talk; I hope you enjoy the special mid-week update.**

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

The last Sunday of October started out fairly normal for me. I got up, the same as I do every other morning, and did martial arts training before grabbing a quick bite to eat and jumping in the shower. Pretty normal stuff. Up until Wei walks into the living room while I'm watching t.v. and says, "Syaoran-sama, shouldn't you get changed? Sakura-sama is to be here at nine, correct? That's less than five."

"What?" I eyes dart to where the clock hangs on the wall. The big hand sits just past the eleven. "Crap," I spring to my feet and bolt down the hall.

Damn it. How the heck did this happen? It was eight when I sat down in front of the t.v. That was less than half an hour ago... Wasn't it?

I grab my toothbrush, and in my haste, almost send the entire glob from the brush into the sink before it can reach my mouth.

_Beep_! At the sound of the doorbell, I rinse my mouth so quickly that I can still taste the foam on my tongue. "I've got it!" I'm halfway to the door when I realize something. Crap! Where the hell is my shirt? Groaning, I turn back around and rush to my room. "Never mind; don't got it!"

Gah! I nearly run into Wei on my way back down the hall. "Can you get the door?"

"Of course," Wei says after me.

"Thanks, I'll just be a second."

Once in my room, I throw the closet door open. "Shirt, shirt, shirt... Where are all of my t-shirts?" Of course, my hamper is full of exactly what I need. Do I really want to re-wear a shirt when Sakura is here? Damn it, I'm a guy; this really shouldn't be an issue. Stupid- yet not at all stupid, because she's totally wonderful and perfect and everything else that I'm not about to name since it would take to long and be way too embarrassing- Sakura.

In the end I grab a clean, button-up, long-sleeved shirt from its hanger and pull my arms through the sleeves as I briskly walk down the hall once more. Entering the living room with the bottom three buttons done, I find Sakura and Wei conversing just off the hallway to the door.

Wei is the first to become aware of my presence. Sakura follows his gaze, and when her eyes land on me, they don't look at my face, but my semi-exposed chest. Wide eyed and completely flushed, Sakura quickly averts her gaze and brings up her hand to block out her peripheral.

That just made my day.

"Sorry. Lost track of time." Yeah, not sorry at all. That reaction was priceless.

A now red-faced Sakura says, "Clearly."

"Syaoran-sama," Wei scolds.

"What?" I feign innocence.

"You taint a young maiden's eyes. Can't you see that you're making poor Sakura-sama uncomfortable?"

"Oh, come on. She has an older brother, for crying out loud. I'm sure she's seen much worse."

"Yeah, but you aren't my brother!" Sakura yells, glaring at me, then she sees I've made little progress with the shirt and turns around again. "Would you hurry up?"

I'm tempted to tease her, but with Wei watching, I'd rather not. He already has enough against me in terms of my feelings for Sakura. No reason to give him any more.

"Yeah, yeah. Hold your horses; I'm almost... Done." I leave the top two undone and roll up the cuffs.

Sakura cautiously peeks through her fingers before finally facing me. "Good."

"Sakura-sama." She gives Wei her full attention. "Before the two of you start studying, how would you like to help me bake some cookies?"

Sakura's eyes light up and she gasps excitedly. Clasping her hands together, she says, "I'd love to! Are they for a special occasion?"

Wei shakes his head. "I thought it might be nice to spend some time catching up with you since you're here." Directed at me, he asks, "You don't mind if I borrow her, do you?"

Sakura turns to me again with pleading eyes. Why is this my decision? Oh, right. Sakura is a guest at my house as well as my 'student', and Wei is my butler. With a sigh, I simply say, "Go ahead."

Sakura grins. "Awesome. So, what kind of cookies are we going to make?"

"Hey." She looks at me again, slightly less hyperactive. "Don't forget that we're still going to study afterwards."

"I know, I know," she waves me off. "I have so many things I want to talk to you about," she says to Wei.

"In that case," he gestures for her to lead the way, "let's get started."

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

In the kitchen, Wei expertly cracking eggs while I measure the flour. We've been in the here cheerfully conversing for about ten minutes now. Then, out of nowhere, Wei asks, "How has your family been?"

The question makes me tense up. "They're... Alright."

Wei pauses with an egg in his hand. "That doesn't sound very convincing."

Placing the measuring cup down, I lean on the counter. "I almost forgot how good you are at reading people, Wei-san. You're right; we haven't been 'alright' since mom was diagnosed with cancer."

"Do you want to talk about it?" I don't say anything. "It's alright if you don't. I know it's hard for you."

"No, it's just... I don't really talk about it much. Most of the time people are too afraid to ask. The ones that do aren't always very understanding."

"There's no judgment here." I give him a small smile.

"I know." I bend over and rest my elbows on the counter so that I can run my fingers through my hair. "Truth is, Touya and I have had to support ourselves and our father. After mom passed away, dad started drinking. It actually ended up getting him fired from his job. That was maybe six months after the funeral. Ever since, Touya and I have had to find work in order to pay all the bills."

"By yourselves? Why not ask one of your relatives for help? Miss Daidouji is your cousin, is she not?"

I nod. "Tomoyo _is_ technically my second cousin, but I was never comfortable with asking her or her mother for financial support."

"I see." Wei doesn't say anything for a moment, and then finally asks, "So all of these years you and your brother have been working and going to school at the same time? Isn't that-"

"No," I interrupt. "I'm sorry." Looking over at him, I nod my head in a silent apology. "But no. Touya dropped out of school his senior year so that he would have more hours and I'd be able to focus more on my studies." There's a lump in my throat. "He was trying to give me the best chance at life that he could, but-" I clamp my hand down over my mouth and turn away as a sob grips at my being. "I'm sorry."

Suddenly I feel Wei's hand on my back. "Don't be." He rubs circles between my shoulder blades.

"Wei!" My body stiffens. No, no, no. Don't come in here. Please, do _not_ let him come in here. I don't want him see me like this. "Do you know where I put the-" Syaoran's voice dies in his throat. My silent prayers go unanswered as I hear his footsteps stop just a few feet away.

Using the counter for support, I try to stop my body from trembling and steady my breaths, but it doesn't seem to work. "Sakura!" I hear him cross the kitchen until he's right next to me, covering my hand with his and reaching out to brush my hair aside. As I close my eyes so that I can't see him, more tears spill over. "Sakura, what's wrong? Are you hurt?"

Rapidly shading my head, I choke out in a trembling voice, "I'm fine." Although I feel an overwhelming urge to lean against him, I pull away. Slipping my hand out from beneath his, I back away, nearly running into Wei. "Sorry," I mutter. "Excuse me." I give a brief bow and rush off down the hall until I reach the bathroom where I shut myself inside and try to regain control.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

"What happened? Is she alright?" I watch, panicked, as Wei turns to me heavy-heartedly.

"I asked her something that was hard for her to talk about. She's going to be alright. She just needs some time to herself right now."

I look past him to where Sakura disappeared mere seconds earlier. So she's not hurt, then. That's a relief. With the way she was crying, I though for sure something must have happened.

My eyes travel to Wei once more. What had they been talking about that would have Sakura break down like that?

* * *

A few minutes later, Sakura returns to the kitchen. She pauses in the doorway and looks at us with a reassuring smile that is clearly forced. "Sorry about that. I'm fine now, though; I promise." She steps up to the counter.

"Is it alright if we continue?" Wei simply nods. Next thing I know, her eyes are on me, watching almost as if she's waiting for me to say something. Somehow I get the impression that she's wary of my presence. Then, very casually, she asks, "Do you want to help?"

Shoot. Once again, I didn't even realize that I've just been standing here when I'm supposed to be moving. "No, that's alright. I'll leave both of you to it." Wasting no time, I exit the room. I stop when I'm just a few steps down the hall, though.

From the kitchen, I hear Wei's kind, low voice ask, "Are you sure you're going to be alright, Sakura-sama?"

After a moment, Sakura replies. "Yeah. I'm sorry if I'm troubling you. There was a," she pauses, "family emergency a few days ago. Ever since, it just feels like my entire world is crumbling apart. I'd rather not talk about it, though."

"I see." There's a shuffling sound. "Sakura-sama, I may not know all the details, but I will tell you this: there will always be times in your life when it feels like the entire universe is against you, but in reality, it's not. Things won't ever get any better unless you choose to _make_ them better. It's true that there are some things that we simply can't control, but when you encounter one of those things, you have to remind yourself that you're only human. If there's one thing we're good at, it's fighting back. That said, I'm confident you're going to be just fine, Sakura-sama."

Even though they aren't meant for me, Wei's words hold heavy on my chest. I find myself staring down at the hardwood floors deep in thought.

Sakura's reply is short and sweet. "Thank you."

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

After putting the cookies in the oven, Wei sends me to find Syaoran while he cleans up. I do so very reluctantly. When I find him, he's laying on the couch in the living room with his head resting on a pillow at one end and his feet perched at the other end, one ankle over the other. I almost laugh when I see the book on his face and his arms folded loosely over his torso.

I walk up to him with a sigh. "What are you doing, Syaoran?" My voice is a very soft so that I don't wake him. Leaning over the back of the couch, I carefully pick the book up off of Syaoran's face. Just as I suspected. He's asleep.

Closing the book and placing it just above his arms, I carefully take one of his wrists, lift it up and set it down so that his hand is on top of the book, keeping it in place. Before pulling my arm back, I let my fingers glide across the back of his hand. His skin is so warm that I feel myself instinctively press my palm down on his knuckles.

"Hm." What starts out as a sigh turns into a blissful hum. When we were kids, we used to hold hands all the time. Well, _I_ would hold _Syaoran's_ hand; he would play along. He wasn't a very affectionate person most of the time, whereas I basically treated him like my own, personal, human-sized teddy bear. I must have soaked through over a dozen of his shirts with all the times I cried on his shoulder. He was like my island of salvation. Always there when I needed him; up until he left for Hong Kong. I've never had to wonder why I fell in love with him, because there are a million reasons.

I smile to myself. Those were the good old days. My hand shifts, and I wrap my fingers as far around his hand as they'll reach.

"Guess we aren't kids anymore, are we, Syaoran?" I squeeze his hand.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Holy- A hand darts across Syaoran's body and clamps down around my wrist before I have time to react. My head flicks to the side, and I'm met with alert amber eyes. Alert. Almost as if- The blood rushes to my face.

"How long have you been awake?"

His expression doesn't change. He almost looks curious. "I was never asleep."

Syaoran's grip on my wrist loosens and I eagerly pull away. As I take a step back, Syaoran pushes himself up and sets the book on the table. Then he directs his attention to me, studying me intensely. I feel exposed. Naked. Like he's seeing straight through me into my soul.

"Stop looking at me at like that."

He swings his legs over the side. "What do you mean, 'We aren't kids anymore'?" I step back again as he stands up and faces me.

"Nothing," I lie.

"You were holding my hand," he states incredulously.

I shake my head, looking away. "I wasn't; I was just-"

"Sakura, you can talk to me." He steps around the couch and advances towards me.

"No!" He's wrong. It's just as I said; we aren't kids anymore.

He steps forward, I step back. "Don't!" When he reaches out to take my shoulder, I take one final step away, and my back hits the wall. "Don't touch me!"

"Sakura, it's okay."

"No, it's not!"

"You don't have to shut me out, Sakura." My entire body goes cold. 'You don't have to shut me out'. The words echo through my mind. He's wrong. How could he understand what it feels like? Syaoran doesn't know that pain. The pain of being left behind, unable to do anything to prevent it.

My throat constricts and my breaths become shallow. Not again. I've already had one break down today. Syaoran's voice buzzes in my ears, but my brain won't process the words. I just want it to stop. Stop talking. "Shut up!"

Then I'm flying; running full speed down the hall. I don't even pay attention to where I'm going. As I pass the doorway leading into the kitchen, I catch a glimpse of Wei on his way into the hall- no doubt wondering what the shouting is about. "Sakura-sama," he calls from behind me in alarm. I don't pause or look back.

I've never been this far into the back of Syaoran's apartment before, so with no idea where I'm going anymore, I stop at a random door and enter the room, shoving the door closed behind me. My eyes dart around the room before me. In the forest of green, there's a spot of pink. I turn my head in the direction of the contrasting color and then I see it.

No way.

One step forward.

No _way_.

Another step.

It can't be...

Three steps.

But I know that it is.

I stop in front of the desk and reach out. My shaky hands wrap around the pink teddy bear. What is this doing here?

Finally, it clicks. The forest green walls, the neatness, the teddy bear... This is _Syaoran's_ room.

Suddenly it's too much. The room, the bear, knowing that the one I once loved is somewhere just beyond the door... I can't breath. Was it always this hot in here? I need to get out. I need to-

"Sakura?" Syaoran's voice travels down the hallway from somewhere beyond the doorway. "Look, I'm sorry. Can we just talk for a minute, please?" Footsteps grow louder and louder. My stomach twists. "Sakura?"

At that moment, I notice the glass sliding doors on the far side of the room. Wasting no time, I stumble forward and pull the door aside. It doesn't budge. After fumbling with the lock, I try again and am met with little resistance.

"Don't tell me you're-"

The door shuts before I can hear him finish. At the same time, though, I see Syaoran appear through the door to the bedroom. He catches sight of me right away. First he looks at my face, tears in my eyes, with a confused look. Then he notices the bear in my arms, and immediately rushes forward. He's right in front of the door with his hand on the handle before I can even blink.

Then I do something both stupid and desperate. I put my left hand on the side of the door opposite the handle. Right at the tiny crack where the two doors overlap. Syaoran immediately stops. He knows as well as I do that if he tries to open this door, my fingers could get caught. I can see it on his face as our eyes meet. My lip trembles. Clutching the bear to my breast, I rest the top of my forehead against the glass and, with my face tilted down, close my eyes and let the tears fall.

All these years and he still has the bear I gave to him. That should make me happy, right? I should be ecstatic. So why does it hurt this much? I can feel my heart breaking all over again. Part of me wishes he'd thrown it away.

"Move your hand, Sakura!" He yells from the other side. His voice is muffled, but still audible. All I can do is shake my head defiantly.

"You should have thrown her-" I stop. No. "It," I correct myself, "away."

"Stop!" The harshness in his voice makes me flinch.

"Sakura!" This time it's not harsh, but twice as urgent. "Please." I can barely hear him now. "Stop shutting me out," he pleads. "I know that it's hard." This time he speaks a bit louder. "I know that it hurts, but if you keep on pushing me away, it's never going to get any better." I think back to what Wei said earlier. 'Things won't ever get any better unless you choose to _make_ them better.'

"You have no idea how much it hurts me to be on the outside looking in. It kills me that you won't let me try to understand. I want to be there for you. Please, Sakura. I'm _begging_ you, just let me in." He sounds so broken. So broken and desperate. Somehow it sounds familiar, like I've heard it before. It hits me very abruptly. That day at the airport when he tried to get me to listen to him, but I was too devastated to think straight. At my abrupt realization, my eyes snap open.

Oh. How did I not see this? Have I really been so blinded by my resentment and self-pity that I haven't even seen what's been right in front of me this entire time?

On the other side of the door, Syaoran is on both knees with his head down and his shoulders hunched. His hands press against the glass. Quickly pulling my hand away from the door, I fall to my knees as well. Now sitting on the patio, I reach up and press both hands to the glass in the same two spots as his, allowing the pink plush to fall onto my lap in the process. I tilt my head to see Syaoran's face, but his bangs hang too low for me to see.

"Syaoran." My voice is gentle, but I speak clearly enough that the sound travels to the other side of the door. He looks up immediately. When he does, I feel overwhelmed. I find myself staring deeply into his eyes, trying to read them, but being so taken my all of the emotions within that I begin to get lost in those shining pools of amber.

We just stare at one another for a moment. It feels like the first time that I'm really _seeing_ him. Once the moment is over, Syaoran's gaze turns to where our hands are perfectly aligned on either side of the glass. A piece of glass; that's all that separates us.

Even though I can't hear him, when Syaoran opens his mouth and his lips move, I know what he's saying. Very slowly, his lips for the words, 'Please, let me in'. So I do.

I reach up and give the door a tug, putting all my body weight into it. With the angle I'm sitting at, the door only opens a crack, but it's enough. I slip both hands into the crack in in the door and push the door the rest of the way aside. As soon as the glass is out of my way, I reach out and pull Syaoran to me before he gets the chance to speak.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Syaoran presses his face into the side of my neck and wraps his arms around me in return. One of my hands holds the back of his head while the other wraps around to his back and holds him to me. "I never realized," I whisper, the weight of the plush toy on my lap suddenly feeling like a barbell, "you've been hurting, too." The arms around me tighten and I'm crushed against my favorite amber eyed boy. There's something about the way his chocolate hair tickles my face that I find oddly comforting.

"Sakura." His breath against my neck makes my head spin. Without warning, he pulls away and brings up his hands to hold my face. I cover his hands with my own and close my eyes as he gently wipes the tears away. "How did we let things get so out of hand?" Syaoran's hands slip from my face and descend to my lap. Taking the gift I once gave to him, he holds it up between us.

"I wish I knew." At that moment, I laugh. It's an awkward, almost forced, laugh, but once I've started, I can't seem to stop. "Kind of makes me wonder."

"Why are you laughing right now?" Despite his words, I can see a smile creeping on his face.

"It's just," I say between laughs, "we're such idiots."

"You got that right," he says, with a hint of humor in his voice.

Smiling tenderly, I look from him to the bear and then reach out and take it from his hands. "You kept her." I bring the pink plush close to my heart and hold it protectively in my arms. "Even after all these years." I lift my head to look at him again. "Why?"

"How could I not?" Embarrassed, Syaoran laughs lightly and reaches up with one hand to cover his face. The action is terribly adorable and I have to resist the urge to throw myself at him again.

Finally, unable to hold back the truth anymore, I ask, "Can I tell you something, Syaoran?"

There's a moment of hesitation where he studies my face; then he agrees.

With my head down, I close my eyes, take a deep breath and quietly admit, "I hate it. Not being able to talk to you like we used to..." My eyes drift half open, and observe my eight-year-old self's needling to make the teddy bear. "Even when it was just random, meaningless conversations, I still miss it. Every time I would see you at school it was like this constant reminder."

"That makes two of us."

My head snaps up. "What do you mean?"

"At school, whenever I would pass you in the halls, you would either glare at me or all out ignore me. It was absolute torture."

I smile again. "Yeah, sorry about that," I giggle. "It seemed well-deserved at the time, though." By 'the time', I'm basically referring to every instance over the past seven years that it's happened.

"That's real comforting," he says sarcastically.

"Whatever," I brush it off. Come to think of it... "Hey, Syaoran, there's one more thing." He awaits for me to continue. "Something I've always wondered about it, but never outright questioned." Now he seems curious, nodding for me to go on, so I do. "Why did you come back?" I ask slowly and earnestly. "Not right after mom died, but the second time."

Syaoran's curiosity wanes into sadness. He seems deep in thought for a moment before saying, "The only reason I went back to Hong Kong after the funeral was because I was trying to give you the space I thought you wanted and needed. I suppose there was a part of me that hoped if I gave you enough time, you'd eventually forgive me." He sighs. "I tried to stay away; really, I did. My mother and Wei both knew I wasn't happy, though."

I imagine a younger Syaoran, alone in Hong Kong, sitting and staring at his homework with a vacant expression. Even though it's a figment of my imagination, I still shiver.

"Other than my family, there was nothing for me in Hong Kong. All of my friends are here in Japan."I feel a pang of guilt. Syaoran was suffering and staying away from all of his friends because of me. Because he didn't want to push me too far when I was already going through hell.

Syaoran takes me by surprise when he smiles and says, "I love both Tomoeda and Hong Kong, but this is where I wanted to grow up. It's where my life is."

I watch his face closely as he says it. It's so heartfelt that I, too, find myself smiling. Then, not caring how he chooses to interpret it, I look him in the eye and say, "I'm glad."

* * *

**I want you all to know that I'm grinning like an idiot right now. So excited. Although I'm not sure why, because most of you don't comment. But to those of you who do, I'm all hyped up to hear your thoughts.**

**Oh, and hey! I've got 51 followers right now! How awesome is that?! Anyway, I wanted to say thanks to all of you who have read my story and stuck with it all of this time. It means a lot to me that you all enjoy reading this.**

**Sincerely yours,**

**CupCake**


	16. Mr Perfect's Best Day Ever

**Note: This chapter is short. A mini-chapter in Syaoran's POV. Starts out emotional, se be prepared. It's all cheery after the first section, though.**

**One of my reviews came in late, so I had to change what this initially said. To Yggdra: yes, that was intentional. I'm so glad someone picked up on that. Everyone else: the glass door from last chapter was a Tsubasa reference.**

**Oh, and thanks for all the reviews. I figured after what I said last chapter, there would be a few more reviews, but that was insane.**

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

Truth be told, when Sakura asked me why I came back to Japan, I _may_ have left out a certain something. Even though it made it impossible for me to stay aways, I still would've returned to Japan even without it. The reason I didn't mention it to Sakura was because it _is_ Sakura.

When I left the second time to give her space, it was absolute torture. Saying I wasn't 'happy' was an understatement. As pitiful as it sounds, I was depressed. Not even all four of my crazy sisters made me feel better for more than a few minutes at a time. I don't have friends in Hong Kong like I do in Japan. Most people just saw me as the rich and powerful Li kid who didn't like socializing with others. I can't say it's not true, though. Whenever people came up to me- which wasn't very often- I would brush them off. They always went away eventually. Well, all except for Sakura. She was the first real friend I ever had aside from Wei and my cousin, Meiling.

So, was I depressed when I left her behind in Japan? Yes, I was. There's never been a time in my life that I've felt as hollow as I did back then. No matter how many times she would pass by me in the halls and ignore me, or we would cross paths and she would be rude and distant towards me, the stinging sensation it left me with was nothing in comparison to the emptiness of not seeing her at all. It was enough for me to just be able to see her. Almost anything was better than having those one thousand seven hundred and thirty-three miles between Hong Kong and Japan separating her from me.

_This_, however, is something I never could've wished for. I'd given up hope of Sakura ever letting me back into her life a long time ago. Sure, we'd made an agreement to start over, but I never expected anything like this to happen. For the first time it's like we're finally starting to understand each other.

I let my gaze slip to the emerald eyed beside me for the umpteenth time as she smiles widely, watching Wei transferring the cookies that he just pulled out of the oven onto a metal cooling rack. She's absolutely radiant.

* * *

"So, does this mean I'm back to being Syaoran again?"

With a cookie between her teeth, Sakura glares at me. Bringing the still unbitten cookie away from her mouth, she snaps, "Wipe that smile off your face before I change my mind." I immediately drop the happy-go-lucky expression. Satisfied, Sakura brings the cookie to her lips once more and bites it in half. "Mn." Her eyes light up as she chews. Intrigued by her reaction, I reach around her and pick one up. "These cookies are wonderful, Wei. I think we did fairly well, all things considered."

"Agreed. Thank you for your help, Sakura-sama."

"I hate to interrupt," I begin, "but we should probably get started studying now."

She glares at me again. "_Must_ you?"

"Yep. Exams are tomorrow."

"Don't remind me." She picks up another cookie from the wrack. "Now that I think about it, isn't this kind of cramming?"

"That's debatable. We've been studying all month. Just think of this as last minute review."

Sakura rolls her eyes. "Huge difference. Let's just get this over with." She drags her feet as she exits the kitchen, and I gleefully follow behind, picking up a cookie on my way out.

* * *

We've been studying for somewhere around three hours when Sakura nearly gives me a heart attack by spontaneously jumping up while I'm in the middle of saying something, and yells, "Lunch Break!" All I can do is stare at her with the textbook I was reading from a second ago still open in my hands. Before I can even turn my head, she's bolted from the room and down the hall.

What just happened?

By the time I've reached the kitchen, Sakura is already there with her arms stretched above her head.

"You do realize that I was in the middle of explaining something, right?"

The emerald-eyed girl looks over at me and rolls her eyes at my reaction. "No big deal."

She grins sweetly, but it's clear she wants something. "So, I don't suppose you want to make lunch for two, do you?"

I sigh and walk over to the fridge. "Sure; why not? What do you have in mind?"

From behind me, Sakura walks up and pokes her head over my shoulder. "Depends. What do you have?"

"Um..." I can't help but glance over my shoulder at her. Focus, Syaoran. She just asked a question. "Well, it's still only lunch, so-"

"Only lunch? Lunch is the most important meal of the day!"

"I think you're confusing it with breakfast."

"Oh... Whatever! No reason not to make something nice," she declares with a wide grin.

"Wait a minute." I shut the door and turn around to face her. "Why are you so eager for something elaborate?" I raise an eyebrow suspiciously. "Does this have something to do with my cooking?"

"Psh, wha-" She crosses her arms and looks anywhere but at me. "No..." One accidental meeting of our eyes, and she finally admits, "Fine, but I mean come _on_, your omelets are like miniature drops of sunshine." I've never been more fond of my culinary skills than I am right now.

"Miniature drops of _what_?"

Glaring at me again, she snaps, "Stop laughing."

"I'm not laughing." And it's taking a bit of effort right now, to be honest.

"You're right; what you're doing is way worse. It's the most common form of Syaoran laughing. There it is again! I can see it in your eyes."

"Most common form of 'Syaoran laughing'? You can see it in my _eyes_?"

"Yes. You hardly ever actually laugh, but you always get that amused look in your eyes."

"Alright, whatever you say."

She shakes her head and redirects us back to the initial conversation. "As I was saying, it would make me super happy if you made something extra delicious for lunch. So," she pauses and grumbles, "will you _please_ make me something?"

Did she actually just say please? This day can not get any weirder... Or better for that matter. Unless she were to suddenly throw her arms around me and confess her undying love, but something's telling me that's just not going to happen.

I take a low bow and say, "As you wish, princess." Righting myself once more, I nearly have to bend over again to conceal my amusement. She has the most dumbfounded look on her face. It takes her a moment to compose herself, but when she does, she begins to look playfully entertained.

Lifting her chin and crossing her arms, she huffs and says, "Good. Now get to it, servant boy." She very dramatically flips her hair and, putting a hand on her hip, struts into the dining room like she's on a runway.

"Right away, your majesty." Even as I bow once more, I keep my eyes trained on her retreating figure.

A minute later when I've finished gathering all of the needed items, Sakura reappears in the doorway and says in the same stuck-up tone, "Servant boy, where has my trusted advisor, Sir Wei, gone off to?"

Sir Wei? This is getting more and more amusing with each sentence that comes out of our mouths.

"Probably out taking care of business. He does do business with Hong Kong, after all."

"Ah!" She seems to pick up on my hint. "So he does. That is all, servant boy."

Before she can turn to go I quickly pipe up, "With all due respect, princess, I believe the term is manservant."

"Preposterous. It is most definitely servant boy."

"Your excellency wounds me. Do I appear a mere boy?"

Sakura's face is beginning to look a bit more pink than it did a minute ago. "Ugh, fine, _manservant_." She drops the snobbish guise and walks over to me. "Didn't mean to hurt your _manly_ pride." She knocks against my chest with the back of her hand, only to frown and do it again, this time with her eyes on the spot she's coming in contact with. "Geez, what in the world do you eat?"

If she did hurt my 'manly pride', then that just made up for it.

"I don't think it's so much about what I eat as it is how often I excursive. Which is every day." The comment earns me a death glare.

"Seriously?"

"I'm just stating a fact." I innocently rise my hands up, palms towards her.

"It's not _what_ you're saying, it's how you're saying it."

"Which is..."

"Like an arrogant jerk! Just because you're Mr. Perfect, doesn't mean-"

"Whoa, wait! What did you just say?" I wouldn't be able to hide the smirk on my face even if I tried. "Mr. Perfect?" I take it back; the day just got better.

Her face turns completely red. "I didn't mean it like that!"

"Funny; I never realized it had more than one meaning."

"Are you _trying_ to tick me off right now?" She looks about ready to punch me in the face at this point. Thankfully, she's not a violent person... Except for when she's throwing erasers at her tutor... Or slapping him on the side of the head... Or threatening to knee him in the genitals. Okay, so maybe she can be violent on occasion, but she wouldn't actually hit anyone with the intention of hurting them.

"Maybe a little, but, in my defense, you _are_ the one who said you missed talking like we used to."

"Already starting to regret that," she says, shaking her head. "As I recall, you weren't typically this outgoing."

"Usually not, but I had my moments. Do you remember that one time when we all went to the amusement park and you made me eat all that cotton candy?"

She emits a sharp gasp. "That's right!" She bursts out laughing at the memory. "I thought you had lost your mind, or been abducted by aliens and brainwashed or something. But, hey, I didn't _force_ you to eat it."

"Yes you-" Oh... Wait a minute... Did she actually insist that I have some, or just offer me it with an irresistibly cute face? I wouldn't have had a say in the matter either way.

At my silence, she nods. "Thought so."

Remembering the topic we strayed from, I ask, "So, tell me again, what was that you were saying about me being Mr. Perfect?"

This time she groans and hangs her head. "I should have just stayed home today."

"Aw, but if you had stayed home we wouldn't have _bonded_." She looks up and scowls at my tone, so I quickly ask in a more serious voice, "All teasing aside, aren't you even a little happy that we finally got that out of the way? Well, actually, you had to have been with the way you were laughing."

"'All teasing aside,' you say." She rolls her eyes and shakes her head. "Spare me."

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah. And I suppose, even though it wasn't exactly a walk in the park for us to get here, being able to talk to you again is nice." She looks away, mumbling, "Although, it's a little weird talking about what we're talking about."

"You're the one making it awkward right now."

"Well, don't go and point it out!"

"Hey, you're the one who mentioned it in the first place. If you stop thinking about it so hard, it wouldn't seem weird."

"Just change the subject, please!"

"Got it. Now, what exactly about me makes me Mr. Perfect?"

"That's it, I'm going back to the dining room."

As she leaves the room, I call after her, "I can still talk to you without shouting." It requires me to raise my voice a little, but not to the point I'm yelling.

"Just make lunch already, would you?"

I smile. "Alright, alright."

* * *

Twenty minutes later, I enter the dining room carrying a plate in each hand. Sakura sits in the same seat she sat last time, with her head in her arms and her eyes closed. No wonder she's been so quiet. I set down the plate in my right hand.

"Sakura." I gently nudge her shoulder. "Come on, Sakura. Wake up." She groans and swats my hand away. "I finished making lunch, but if you don't want any, then I'll just-" Her hand shoots out and grabs the sleeve of my shirt.

"Don't," she groans. "Food."

I set the second plate down across from her and kneel down beside her. The hand holding my shirt slips until it hangs limply beside her. "It's only been twenty minutes, Sakura. You can't be that tired already."

"Go away." She tires to push me away again. This time her hand swats me in the face, making me grimace. I grab her hand to keep it from moving, and shake her shoulder again.

"You need to wake up now, Sakura. The food is going to get cold." I must be getting through to her, because her frown deepens. "It's noodles." Yep. Definitely got through. Her eyes snap open.

"Noodles?" She picks her head up to find the plates of food sitting on the table.

"You bet," I say. Her head whips over to me. She sits up all the way and realizes her hand is in mine.

"Sorry." Sakura's warm hand slips from my grasp. It leaves my own hand feeling strangely empty afterwards, but I shrug it off. "How long did you say I was out?"

"Less than twenty minutes." I rise to my feet long enough to sit back down in my chair.

"Oh. There's just something about this place that seems to-" She yawns.

"I see that."

I pick up the second plate and set it down in front of her. "Thanks. What is this?" She looks curiously at eh noodles, trying to figure out what type they are.

"Try it." I take my chopsticks and begin to eat.

Sakura hesitantly follows suit. Lifting the noodles up in front of her, she blows on them and brings them to her lips. I try not to stare, but totally fail. If she doesn't like them, I don't think I'll ever cook another meal in my life. Thankfully, her eyes widen, and she looks down at the plate then up at me before giving me an enthusiastic thumbs up.

After chewing, she asks, "What did you do? I don't think I've ever had anything quite like this before."

"It's a Chinese dish," I explain. At first I wan't sure if I should make it, but it's quick and easy, so I went for it.

Sakura looks at the noodles as if I've unveiled all their secrets. "That would explain it." She looks up at me and smiles appreciatively. "It's delicious, Syaoran. Thank you."

Yeah, it's official: Best day ever.

* * *

**Told you it was shorter than usual. Anyways, if anyone is interested, I'm planning on using my profile to not just tell you guys how the chapters are coming along, but also random authors notes that are too long for here. Plus I put in a little section with random things I like. It's super small, though... I'll try to work on that.**

**Anyways, next chapter is exam week, so expect... I don't even know... Don't worry, though, I won't go into excruciating detail on it.**

**Final thing, I finally got around to naming the chapters so that it would be easier for all of you to figure out what happened when. Don't know about all of you, but I was having a hard time finding certain events. Hope it helps.**

**Until next chapter! *Waves***


	17. Midterms and Twin Bells Café

**Oh, thank goodness. Finally done. Sooooooo tired right now. Exams are finally here. Well, midterms, but whatever. Don't worry, I don't talk about them much.**

**Hehehe. You'll never guess who you meet in this chapter. Okay, you're probably all thinking it already, but it's still exciting. I've been waiting and waiting and waiting for an opportunity to introduce this character, and this is the time. If the situation feels a little odd, then too bad. Just go with it, people.**

**Anyways, you guys are always telling me about how you cry, so I hope you bawl your eyes out at the end. Which reminds me...**

**Disclaimer: I (obviously) don't own Halo by Beyoncé.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

"Are you ready for this?" Tomoyo sits next to me, twirling her hair between her fingers anxiously. Watching her just makes me even more jumpy.

"You're kidding, right? I think I'm going to be sick." I clutch my stomach.

"Please don't," Syaoran says from behind me.

"I can't help it! I'm freaking out!" I spin in my chair to face him. "You do realize that it takes only takes _one_," I hold up my index finger in front of his face, "subject for both of us to be stuck getting up at the crack of dawn for who-knows-how-long to _study_!" I drop my hand.

"Relax. You're psyching yourself out right now."

"Li is right." Tomoyo pries her hands away from her hair. "We just need to relax."

"Thank you, Daidouji." They smile kindly at each other, making me want to roll my eyes.

These two are always super respectful towards each other. Maybe it's because they're both the children of successful business owners. I wouldn't know. The only thing I _do_ know is that they've known each other for over ten years, yet they're still like this. It is ridiculous.

"We've been going over this material for almost a month now," he tells me.

"Yeah, alright." I take a deep breath. "I can do this. I can do this. I can-"

The classroom door slides open, and Mr. Terada enters the room carrying a stack of papers that looks a mile high.

"I lied. I can't do this."

Suddenly warm air blows against the back of my neck. Even though it isn't that hot, I feel as though I've been scorched. "Relax." The word seems to have the opposite effect, making my entire body go tense. "You're thinking too hard about it. Just do your best."

Right. Well, now I'm not so much thinking about the exam as I am thinking about how much I want to snuggle up in my former arch nemesis's arms.

Damn you and your stupid mind games, Syaoran.

* * *

We spend the rest of the week going through a similar morning routine, followed by a day of stressful exams. Thankfully, it's finally the end of the day on Friday. As far as I did on the exams, I'm pretty confident in most of them. Math was the only one that I kept blanking on. I did a lot better than usual, but I'm still not sure if it was enough. Scores aren't given until the beginning of next week.

"This weekend is never going to end," I mumble as I pull on my outdoor shoes.

"You can say that again. How are we supposed to fall asleep with this kind of pressure looming over us." My head shoots up to find Chiharu standing there.

"At least it's not finals, though. Those will probably be twice as bad," Rika says from beside her.

"Rika, Chiharu." I put my indoor shoes back into the locker and shut the door. Turning to face them, I begin, "What are you..."

"I invited everyone to dinner at Twin Bells in celebration of finals ending."

"Oh." By everyone, I assume she means the people she eats lunch with. "Will you still be working?"

"I'm going to talk to Mrs. Matsumoto when we get there." Rika nudges her side. "Anyways, we were wondering if you wanted to join us."

Is that an invitation? Did she just invite me to have dinner with everyone? All I can manage to get out is a very long, drawn out, "Um."

"It's alright if you're uncomfortable. Li seemed fine with it, though."

"No, it's not that," I say before I can even think about it. "I mean, Syaoran and I aren't still..." Aren't still what? Unable to share the same space for more than five minutes? "It's just that with work and the show..."

"That's right," Chiharu remembers. "I almost forgot. We can both talk to Mrs. Matsumoto when we get there, though. In the meantime, do you want to walk with us?" Ah, Chiharu, thank you for knowing what to say when I clearly don't.

"Sure," I say with a smile. Thank goodness I wore normal shoes again today. I've been wearing them all week because my stomach has been too twisted and my nerves too high for me to comfortably stand in my blades.

"Cool. We're going to meet up at the front gate. You ready?"

I nod, and we head towards the front doors. When we get outside, I walk next to Rika while Chiharu races ahead to the gate. In the distance, I can make out Syaoran and Yamazaki waiting there. As we walk up, Syaoran looks over and our eyes meet for a moment before Chiharu speaks.

"Tomoyo isn't here yet?"

"Hey," Tomoyo's cheery voice calls from behind us. I turn around to find her waving at us as she hurries forward. "Sorry I'm late. I had to stop to use the restroom."

"No worries. We just got here, too," Chiharu tells her.

"Perfect." She finally seems to take notice of me. "Sakura, you're here! Does that mean you're going to to eat with us?"

"Chiharu and I are going to talk to Mrs. Matsumoto when we get there."

"Oh. Well, Mrs. Matsumoto is super nice, so I'm sure she'll be fine with it," Tomoyo assures me, gleefully.

I return the smile as reassuringly as I can. Tomoyo's probably right. Although, I'm not sure if I find that a good thing or a bad thing yet. It should be good, right? I'll get to hang out with all of my old friends again for the first time in... Seven years. Wow. It's strange, but for some reason my stomach suddenly doesn't feel too good.

* * *

"So," Tomoyo and I walk side-by-side down the sidewalk a few paces short of Rika and Chiharu. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

"You mean besides the fact that I think I'm going to be sick?" I've been having this problem all week. Here I thought that since exams are finally over, I'd be feeling better.

"No, not that. Although, you should really work on your anxiety. All this stress can't be good for you. It'll make you die young." Horrified, I turn to her with my mouth agape. She laughs at my expression and says, "I'm just kidding. Anyways, what I really meant to ask was: what's going on with you and Li? You two have been acting super weird ever since the beginning of this week. Like, even more than usual, which is saying something, because you two _always_ seem to be acting funky now-a-days."

"It's complicated." My stomach does another dangerous flip. "Oh, please tell me we're almost there. I don't think I can take much more of this."

"How are you going to have a meal and talk with everyone if you can't even walk within ten feet of them all without nearly losing your stomach?"

That's actually a really good question. "I have no idea. I could always try taking something for the it."

"I didn't think those usually worked for you."

"Ah, who knows? Maybe I'll get lucky and the placebo effect will be enough."

Tomoyo gives me a funny look. "Placebo effect?"

I groan. Did I really just say that? "That idiot has been filling my head with strange things."

Tomoyo laughs. "Well, at lease he got through to you. Never thought I'd hear something like that come out of your mouth. Although, I don't think it would work considering you already know that medicine doesn't have any affect on you."

"Crap. You're right. What's worse is that I _know_ you're right." I smack my head. "What the heck is the matter with me?"

"You, my friend," she gives me a devilish smile, "are finally learning new things thanks to that tutor of yours." She glances back to where Yamazaki and Syaoran are. "It's quite adorable, really."

"I don't think 'adorable' is quite the right word for it."

She looks me in the eyes. "I don't know if anyone told you, but he's the one who suggested that we invite you."

I stare at her incredulously. "What?" My eyes travel back to Syaoran. At first, he doesn't seem to notice, then tuns to me and gives a small wave. I hastily turn around again before he can catch the hint of pink rising to my cheeks.

"We were all just as shocked. That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about, Sakura. There's something you haven't told-"

"We're here!" Chiharu suddenly shouts, cutting Tomoyo off. I look up to find us just a few feet short of Twin Bells. "Rika, Li, Takashi," she addresses the three who haven't ever been to the cafe. Very dramatically she waves her hands towards the bright, colorful building in front of us. "Welcome to Twin Bells!"

* * *

Mrs. Matsumoto agreed to let Chiharu and I have dinner with everyone and start working once we finish eating. I still have my live performance, though. Hopefully we finish by then. If not, then I'm worried that I really _will_ be sick.

Re-entering the table area, Chiharu and I make our way over to the table. When we get there, we run into a bit of a snag.

Yamazaki seems to realize the problem almost immediately. "Oh, sorry about that." He glances around the large, circular table. "If you want, we can-"

"No," I stop him. "It's fine." Ignoring the stares from my companions, I slide into the chair between Syaoran and Tomoyo. Everyone but Syaoran, who seems rather amused, gawks at my calm demeanor. They're all undoubtedly wondering why I just so casually sat down next to Syaoran. Then again, he was the one who suggested I come, apparently, so they really shouldn't be so surprised.

Trying not to appear baffled, Chiharu takes the seat opposite me, between Rika and Yamazaki.

"So," she begins, "what did you all think of those midterms?"

* * *

Within five minutes, we're all sitting quietly around the table sipping at our drinks. I try not to glance at Syaoran too often, but whenever I do he seems to sense it, because he is either already looking at me, or he turns towards me as though he expects something. At this point, it's not just my stomach acting flaky, but my rapidly beating heart, too.

"Alright, can I just ask the question on all of our minds?" Yamazaki pipes up out of the blue. We all look at him. "What's going on between you two?" He asks, looking between Syaoran and I, who in turn look at each other. "I mean, four weeks ago, you two couldn't even have a decent conversation without practically ripping the other's throat out."

"Takashi." Syaoran's voice is dangerously low.

"We're all thinking it. I don't mean to be rude or anything, Kinomoto," he says to me in a calm yet curious voice. "I don't mind your being here, but what's with the sudden change?"

I chew my lip in anticipation and glance over at Syaoran.

"Yeah. I wasn't going to say anything with everyone else here, but something's defiantly up." Tomoyo, too? I haven't told her yet because of exams.

"Not going to lie, I'm pretty curious myself," Chiharu states. Syaoran and I finally meet eyes. The others look between us as if trying to figure out what's going on. I'm trying to figure out why we are the center of their attention.

After a moment of desperately begging Syaoran for help with my eyes, he shrugs and says, "We may as well tell them."

"Um," I hesitate, unsure what to say. "Well, to put it plainly, Syaoran and I are-"

"Oh my gosh, are you two are dating?" Rika suddenly bursts out, nearly knocking over her glass of water, but Chiharu reaches out and grabs it.

"Dating?" Tomoyo cries out, her face pale as a ghost.

"What? No!" Where on Earth did she get such a far-fetched idea? Syaoran just shakes his head, unfazed by their antics. "We're just... friends?" It comes out as a question. I look at Syaoran again. Is 'friends' the right word? I mean, it's not as though I mind, but it just sounds so surreal that I can't wrap my head around it.

Syaoran catches my gaze. "Is that meant to be a question or a statement?"

"Um, well, I don't really know what to call it," I admit. Friends usually go out of their way to talk and hang out. We don't do that. I mean, of course we don't, but up until now we weren't 'friends'. Does this mean Syaoran and I are going to start hanging out? That just doesn't sound quite right. Although spending time with him would be nice...

"Kind of strange saying it out loud, but it sounds about right."

"Wait," Tomoyo abruptly interjects. "When did this happen?"

"Um, last weekend at," I gesture to Syaoran, "his apartment."

Tomoyo's brows furrow. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"We were about to take exams! I didn't want to distract you." That's also part of the reason I didn't mention my father to her, either.

"Is there anything else you aren't telling me?" I don't speak, but my eyes say it all. "There is! What is it?"

"Tomoyo, it's kind of... Personal." There's no way I'm about to say something like that with everyone sitting here.

"Too personal to tell your best friend?"

"I don't have to fill you in on every little detail, Tomoyo." I want to stop, but I can't. Every part of my being is telling me that what I'm saying is wrong. "Not like it really matters. You wouldn't understand, anyways." Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

Her mouth hangs wide open. "I wouldn't _understand_?"

"Yes, Tomoyo, you wouldn't."

* * *

**Tomoyo's POV**

Tears of frustration prick the corners of my eyes. "We tell each other _everything_, Sakura. How can you even say that?" My throat screams for me not to shout. Other customers are starting to look at us.

"It's complicated, okay?" Sakura lowers her voice. "I'll explain it later, but right now you need to calm down." She turns away from me, and I shove myself up from the table.

"I need some air." Not waiting for anyone's response, I turn and leave.

What is going on with her? She never blindsides me like that. Is this because of Li? I would sure think, but she almost seems too upset for that.

Not having the answers to any of my questions is tearing at my insides. Once outside, I crumble to my knees with tears rushing down my face. I hate fighting with Sakura. Something about it just makes me feel uneasy and sick. Maybe it's because she's my best friend and I never want to lose her, but it's more than that. For as much as Sakura relies on me, I rely on her equally as much.

I'm pulled from my sorrows by a gentle hand on my shoulder. Startled, my head shoots up and I meet with kind, ocean blue eyes. In front of me, with his hand reaching out to touch my shoulder, is perhaps the most beautiful man I've ever seen. I stare up at him, studying his features. Pale skin greatly contrasts midnight blue hair. Ocean eyes are frame by large wire glasses that give a sense of sophistication.

For a moment, I'm so in awe that I forget everything else. Then the man's mouth opens and words come out. "A young lady of such beauty would be better suited with a smile," he says. Is that an English accent I detect?

The man reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a navy handkerchief. As he holds it out to me, I feel my face heating up. I'm too stunned to move for a few seconds. Then my arm lifts itself up on its own and carefully takes the cloth from his hands.

"Thank you," I manage to say, my voice sounding foreign to my own ears.

The man before me smiles, and I feel butterflies in my stomach. "You're welcome." When he removes his hand from my shoulder, I feel the urge to reach out and grab it. "Please be careful on your way home." He turns to go, and I almost stop him, but am still frozen. Much to my dismay, by the time I'm pulled from my awe enough to move, it's too late.

"Um, excuse-" I reach out, but he's already out of sight. With a great sigh, I stand up, look down at the silky blue cloth in my hand. What was I even crying about, anyways? My entire brain feels like mush. The man's accented voice lingers in my ears. Little electricity spikes through my shoulder where he touched it. Who was that? And, more importantly, will I ever meet him again?

* * *

As I reenter the cafe, I almost collide with Sakura, who seems to have been frantically pacing in front of the entrance, much to the annoyance of her fellow coworkers. The second she sees me, she grabs hold of my hands. "Tomoyo, I am so sorry that I didn't tell you about it." Words tumble from her lips like a faucet. "I just wan't ready then, but I am now, so I promise that I'll tell you later. Okay?"

Even though I can hear everything she says, the words don't go all the way through. The blue-haired man's face keeps on popping up in my mind. I find myself absentmindedly running my thumb along a crease in the silk handkerchief.

"Tomoyo?" Sakura seems to realize I'm not really listening.

"Huh? Sorry, I didn't catch that."

"I said I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier, but I promise to explain everything as soon as we're alone." That's right, we were just fighting, weren't we?

"Oh. Okay, Sakura. It's fine. Sorry I freaked out. It just made me a little insecure that you hadn't told me already."

"I know. Everything I said was lies, Tomoyo. I don't really feel that way at all. You know that, right?"

"Of course I do, Sakura." Suddenly, I feel her arms around me, and the next thing I know, I'm being encircled by her.

"Thank you, Tomoyo. I have no idea how it is you put up with someone like me."

The comment makes me laugh. I don't say anything, though. I don't need to.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

The rest of the dinner turns out fairly well. At first it's a bit awkward, but after a few lighthearted jokes from Yamazaki, everyone loosens up. Even me. My stomach stops doing that cruel, torturous flipping. It's strange how at home I allow myself to feel while with everyone. It's as though I belong here, with them. They're like my second family. Long lost relatives, catching up. Even though we've been apart for a long time, we don't seem to have any trouble re-adjusting to each-other's presence.

When it comes time for my live performance, everyone is getting ready to order desert.

"Sakura, it's time." That's all that Ruby has to whisper into my ear for me to stand up and excuse myself from the table.

"Where are you going?" I look down at Syaoran. For a long moment, I don't say anything but stare at him.

He's about to ask again, when I tell him, "Just listen; okay?" Without waiting for a reply, I turn to leave.

In the back, I'm about to change out of my school uniform when Tomoyo appears in the doorway.

"What are you doing back here? Shouldn't you be ordering?"

"They'll be fine without me for a little while. I wanted to give you something, actually."

"Hm?" Give me something? All of the things Tomoyo gives me are-

"Here we go." She seemingly pulls a beautiful pink dress out of thin air. "I've been keeping it here for a special occasion, which this sure seems like to me."

"Tomoyo," I smile at her. "Have I ever told you how wonderful you are?"

"Yes. Yes, you have." She ushers me towards the changing area. "Now get changed. I wanna hear what it is you have to say to Li." She winks mischievously, making my face red.

"It's not-"

"Sure it isn't, Sakura. Just get changed."

With one final huff, I stomp farther back into the changing area. Tomoyo sure can be difficult at times. Although, that's just one of the things I love about her.

Five minutes later, I step out of the back room and make my way over to the piano. My eyes wander over to the table as my amethyst eyed friend rejoins our party. Chiharu is the first to see me. When Rika follows her gaze, she waves to me, and I wave back.

Stepping up onto the stage and taking a seat on the piano bench, I feel abnormally calm. Maybe it's because this is something I really want to say to not just Syaoran, but everyone else sitting at that table.

I look up just in time to see Yamazaki whisper something to Syaoran that makes him spin around. It only takes a second for him to zero in on me. Our eyes meet, and after a few very long seconds, I break away from his gaze and my fingers begin to move. I allow my lids to drift shut for a moment as I begin to play.

_Remember those walls I built?_

_Well, baby they're tumbling down_

_And they didn't even put up a fight_

_They didn't even make a sound_

I think back to all those times I passed Syaoran in the halls and ignored him, or when I was cruel and snapped at him. After he left me that day at the airport, I built up walls around myself to keep him out. I would always tell myself that it was his fault.

I remember his face on the other side of that glass. Those eyes. Those captivating pools of amber. He broke down my entire selfdefense with that one look.

_I found a way to let you in_

_But, I never really had a doubt_

_Standing in the light of your halo_

_I got my angel now_

He truly is someone special. No matter how much I wanted to hate him for breaking my heart, I just couldn't. I _can't_. After all, I did fall in love with him once.

_It's like I've been awakened_

_Every rule I had you breakin'_

_It's the risk that I'm taking_

_I ain't never gonna shut you out!_

I won't. Not again. Finally, I understand that I'm not the only one who has been suffering. It took me way too long to figure it out, but now that I have, there's no way I'm going to let him suffer like that anymore. He doesn't deserve that.

_Everywhere I'm looking now_

_I'm surrounded by your embrace_

_Baby, I can see your halo_

_You know you're my saving grace_

I've never felt as safe as I do when Syaoran is holding me. If he'd let me, I'd stay curled up in his arms forever. So warm. So welcoming. Like being enveloped by a warm, radiating bubble. Nothing else in the world ever seems to matter while I'm in it. Just that he's there. Holding me.

For those few brief minutes, I allow myself to believe that maybe he loves me, too.

_You're everything I need and more_

_It's written all over your face_

_Baby, I can feel your halo_

_Pray it won't fade away_

Now that I really look, I can see it. He's taking everything I say to heart. We both know what I'm talking about. That moment we shared when I looked at him and for the first time, realized he needs me, too.

_I can feel your halo, halo, halo_

_I can see your halo, halo, halo_

_I can feel your halo, halo, halo_

_I can see your halo, halo..._

_Halo, ooh ooh..._

_Hit me like a ray of sun_

_Burning through my darkest night_

_You're the only one that I want_

_Think I'm addicted to your light_

It's true. I really can't ever seem to get enough of it. Why does he have to be so... So _Syaoran_? It just doesn't seem fair.

_I swore I'd never fall again_

Is that what I'm doing right now? Falling? After all these years, am I really falling for him _again_?

_But this don't even feel like falling_

_Gravity can't forget to pull me back to the ground again_

It's insanely frustrating how easily I find myself drifting towards him.

_And It's like I've been awakened_

_Every rule I had you breakin'_

_It's the risk that I'm taking_

_I'm never gonna shut you out!_

_Everywhere I'm looking now_

_I'm surrounded by your embrace_

_Baby, I can see your halo_

_You know you're my saving grace_

_You're everything I need and more_

_It's written all over your face_

_Baby, I can feel your halo_

_I pray it won't fade away_

If he ever changed and stopped being the person he is today, I don't know what I would do. A week ago, it wouldn't have had as much of an impact on me, but now that's different. Now I'm...

_I can feel your halo, halo, halo_

_I can see your halo, halo, halo_

_I can feel your halo, halo, halo_

_I can see your halo, halo..._

_Halo, ooh ooh..._

Once the song ends, I can hear soft applaud, but none of it really seems to mater. The only thing that does mater is that Syaoran is right there. Watching me, watching him.

I'm falling in love with him all over again.

* * *

**Alright. Sorry if any of you don't like the song, but it just fit. Believe me, I spent a ton of time deciding what song to use for this story. At the moment, this one seemed to work best.**

**Eriol! That was him, by the way. And yes, he does have an English accent right now, because he just got back from England. You'll read more about that later, though.**

**I know I had more to add, but am drawing a blank. It's really late/early, so I should probably just stop talking now.**

**Thanks for reading.**


	18. Group Lunch

**Yay! This chapter is actually a nice length. A few hundred words longer than last chapter. You guys get to see Eriol again! Not a ton happening with S&amp;S, but I didn't forget about them. This chapter is mainly to finally tie all of the characters together.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

"So, how did Touya react when he found out about your dad?" Tomoyo asks as we walk side by side towards our dreadful high school.

"Oh, you know. He basically freaked out and almost broke our phone. Pretty much exactly what you would expect him to do."

First thing Saturday morning, I called up Tomoyo and pulled her out of the house to talk to her about everything that happened. She was totally freaking out at the time. I swear, I thought she was going to give herself a heart attack. Her hands were on her face and she was basically hyperventilating. Seriously, she gets more worked up about stuff that happens to me than stuff that happens to her. I don't think it's good for her.

"Well you certainly did have a crazy week."

"Tell me about it," I grumble.

Seriously, it was just one thing after another. Hell, all of October has been crazy. First I get stuck being tutored by the one, single most annoying person I know. Then I'm getting close to an old friend who I thought despised me. Oh, and there's the time when my dad went to _prison_, of course. I rekindled an- or maybe even more than one- old friendship. And did I mention that I've found myself falling for someone who I _know_ I can't possibly have a relationship with? I hardly think that's fair. Why is life so cruel? I already fell for him once, and look how that turned out.

Stupid teenage hormones. Yeah, that's what I'm blaming this on. Am I in denial? That's debatable. But I do _not_ need to deal with something like that right now. Screw my stupid stomach that bubbles excitedly whenever our eyes meet. I've got enough problems without any form of romance in my life. Besides, it's not like Syaoran has or will ever see me as anything more than an old friend. Yeah. Who needs him? Not me. Not at all.

"I'm just glad you told me about it." Tomoyo's face starts turning pink. "Actually, there's something I wanted to tell you about, Sakura."

"What? Really?" Panic seethes through me. "Is everything alright?"

"Huh?" Tomoyo looks at me in alarm. "Yes, of course. It's about something that happened on Friday while I was outside."

"Oh." I relax for a moment, only to start thinking about it and turn even more panicked than before. "Did somebody try to abduct you? Or even worse," I drop my voice, "assault you?"

"No! Of course not! I would've been freaking out if that had happen." Thank goodness. My poor, innocent Tomoyo doesn't deserve anything like that. But seriously, why is her face turning red again? "I kind of met someone," she tells me, shyly tugging at the ends of her uniform.

"You what?" I stare at her, too in awe to think of anything better to say. She was outside for ten minutes tops. Who could she have possibly met that would've left such a strong impression?

"Well, we didn't officially meet or anything, but he gave me his handkerchief."

My mind blanks.

What. The. Heck?

What's going on? A shy Tomoyo? This is a new sighting. Sure, I've seen her ogle over guys in a magazine before- heck, I've even joined in- but I've never seen her look so embarrassed because of a guy.

Tomoyo reaches into her bag and pulls out a navy blue handkerchief. "Oh, Sakura, you should've seen him." I recoil as she holds the tiny cloth to her chest and stares up dreamily at the clear azure sky. Something is definitely not right here. "He was handsome in a sophisticated kind of way, and his eyes, oh his eyes, they were the most mesmerizing shade of blue that you've ever seen." She abruptly looks down at me excitedly. "And he had an English accent that was to die for!"

There we go. That's more like Tomoyo. Getting super hyper when talking about boys. Whoosh. Thank goodness for that. Here I was starting to think maybe she _did_ get abducted. By aliens. Whenever people I know start acting weird, that's the first place my mind goes. Maybe I watched too much TV when I was a kid.

"Um, so I take it you like this guy?"

She grabs my hands from my sides and pulls them between us. "Oh, Sakura, you have no _idea_. It was absolutely magical! I felt just like a princess."

"Well," I say, trying not to look too freaked out, "that's nice. Do you know his name?"

Suddenly she drops my hands and looks away. Her bangs cover her eyes but I can see her lips turn turn ever-so-slightly downwards. "No. He left before I could ask."

"Oh. That's too bad." Unsure what to do, I put a reassuring hand on her back. "Maybe you'll run into him again. I mean, for all you know he could be a transfer student who comes to our class midway through the year."

"That only happens in stories. Besides, who would come to Tomoeda from a foreign country midway through senior year?" She has a point. My idea is totally far fetched, and next to impossible.

"Don't give up so soon. You could still meet him. And if not, there are plenty of other fish in the sea."

Tomoyo laughs lightly at my antics. "Yeah, I guess. This one just seemed different. I can't quite put my finger on it, but something about him just made me want to melt into his arms and never leave."

It's sad how much I can relate to that.

"Ah!" Her head suddenly perks up. "We're here!" Before I can even process what she's said, she's racing ahead of me towards the building. "We can finally check our scores!"

Crap. I almost forgot. My feet pound against the concrete as I race after her. "Hey, wait up!"

I don't reach her until we're both standing in front of the huge board in the main hall that lists our scores. "Kinomoto. Kinomoto. Kino- Found it!"

As I read the scores, Tomoyo comes up next to me sighing in relief. "Passed. What about you?" My eyes stay locked on the list of numbers. "Sakura?" I read, re-read, and then read them again a third time just to be sure. "Did you pass?" My lips part. "Are you alright?"

With a sharp intake of breath, I turn to her and say quickly, "I gotta go."

I've spun around and started sprinting down the hall before she even has time to react. When I finally reach our classroom, I throw the door open and pause to assess the room, but only for a second. The two people already in the room turn to me.

"Sakura?" The chocolate-haired boy steps away from the chalkboard. Without a moments hesitation, I run up to him and tackle him.

"I passed!" He stumbles back a few steps from the sudden force of my body being thrown against his, but grabs the back of the teachers desk before we can both go tumbling. "I passed! I passed!" I pull away, clutching his hands and waving them back and forth at our sides. "Syaoran, I passed _all_ of them!"

"You did?"

My head bobs up and down at rapid speed. Soon, I find myself excitedly jumping up and down, tugging him with me.

"Yes! I did!" I stop long enough to give him another bear hug. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

"Oh my gosh!" I quickly pull away from him. "I totally forgot about Tomoyo! Gotta go. I'll see you later, Syaoran." Turning to leave, I stop just before I reach the door and turn around again.

Quickly scurrying back over to him, I grab his face, and give him a quick peck on the cheek. "I couldn't have done it with out you, Syaoran. I owe you."

With that I turn and race out of the room, back to where I left my best friend. Hopefully she isn't too mad at me for ditching her.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

Eyes still glued to the spot the emerald-eyed beauty disappeared, my fingers graze the spot on my cheek where Sakura's lips met my skin.

What just happened?

* * *

**Tomoyo's POV**

Lunch starts out fairly normal. Sakura sends me off to eat with Chiharu and the others saying she wants to go to the library and talk to her friend. The friend I've never met, but who I've heard about from other students. Now that I think about it, I should really ask Sakura to introduce us sometime.

When I enter 3-C and approach my friends in the back of the classroom, Chiharu looks at me and frowns. Then her eyes flick over to the door for a moment.

"Is something the matter?" I ask.

"Where's Sakura?"

"What do you mean? She's in the library as usual. Why do you ask?"

"She didn't come with you?"

"No, she never eats lunch with us." What's gotten into Chiharu all of a sudden? "What's going on, Chiharu?"

"I'll be back in a few minutes." With that, she stands up and marches out of the room with a determined look on her face.

"Where is she going?" Yamazaki asks from behind us. I turn around and raise my shoulders.

"No idea. She asked about Sakura and stormed off saying she'd be back in a few minutes."

"Huh. Weird." Yamazaki glances at Li and then both of them glance to the door before we all return to our lunches.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

"Naoko!" My studious friend sitting at the wooden library table looks up.

"Sakura, you're here. It's been a while. I didn't see you last week." As I approach her, another figure comes into view.

"Yeah," I mumble as my eyes lock-in on the boy sitting beside her. "Have you already found me a replacement?" I ask jokingly. Naoko laughs and shakes her head.

"Not quite. This is Hiiragizawa Eriol; he just transferred into my class today. He asked where the library was, so I figured I'd invite him to sit here since he doesn't know anyone yet."

Just transferred in? Midway through senior year? The blue-haired boy rises to his feet. "Oh, well, it's nice to meet you, Hiiragizawa-kun. I'm Kinomoto Sakura." I hold out my hand and he shakes it. The action makes me feel like a business-woman attending a meeting. "You can just call me Sakura."

"Likewise. And, please, feel free to call me Eriol." Pause everything. Is that what I think it is? Could it be?

"I don't mean to sound too straightforward, but do you mind telling me where you transferred here from?" I ask as we sit down.

He smiles warmly. "Not at all; I just moved back to Japan from England."

"England?" I loudly blurt it out before I can control myself. Eriol simply chuckles as I clap my hand over my mouth. Sure, the accent is a dead giveaway, but still.

"I get that reaction a lot."

"Sorry, it's just a bit of a shock. I could tell it was something European from the accent, but England... That's... Wow. Do you mind me asking why you transferred to a small town in Tomoeda?"

"Actually, I was born here." Well, that would explain the fluent Japanese. "I came back to Tomoeda because of a family matter."

"Oh, sorry! I didn't mean to sound nosy." To lighten the mood, I quickly find myself saying, "You know, I had- well, actually, _have_\- a friend who moved here from Hong Kong, and when he first got here he spoke almost fluently, but still had an accent. It went away after a while, though."

It's almost too bad. Syaoran's accent was absolutely adorable. Every so often we would say a word he didn't know the meaning of, too. He would get this confused look on his face as if we were all speaking a foreign language... Which, in a sense, we were. Although, according to Syaoran, he'd been learning to speak Japanese since he started going to school. Something about his mom wanting to expand Li Corporations to Japan one day. Not sure, though. Syaoran never really talked much about the business, and I never really thought to ask. We were too young for any of it to really matter, anyways.

"Interesting. I wouldn't mind meeting this friend of yours one day."

I'm not sure how to reply when suddenly there's a commotion from behind us. By the time I've turned around, Chiharu's hand is already on my wrist, pulling me away from the table.

"Chiharu?"

"This is getting insane. You're coming with me and eating lunch with everyone."

"What? Wait. What about Naoko?" I dig my heels into the ground. Chiharu stops and assesses the two other people at the table.

"You two come along as well." With that, she spins around and proceeds to drag me out of the library.

Naoko leaps to her feet and runs after us with a worried look on her face. Eriol looks curious and follows along behind Naoko with an amused smile playing at his lips.

"So, I take it she's a friend of yours," Naoko inquires as we are all led down the halls by Chiharu.

"You could say that."

"Are occurrences like this common here?" Eriol asks as he follows behind with a smile on his face.

"I assure you, this doesn't usually happen," Naoko says over her shoulder.

Next thing I know, we're in front of classroom 3-C with Chiharu throwing the door open and very dramatically pushing me inside.

"I've brought back our newest lunch-mate." She glances back at where Naoko and Eriol stand just outside the door. "And picked up two others along the way, apparently." She grabs my shoulders and steers me to where Tomoyo and Rika are sitting. Tomoyo and I lock eyes for a moment, then her gaze shifts to the door and I can see her tense up.

"No way," she mumbles, eyes wide.

"What?" I follow her gaze. Naoko and Eriol both stand inside the classroom watching the events unfold. Naoko looks confused, but Eriol seems to be looking at something with this surprised yet amused expression.

Hold up.

I follow Eriol's gaze. Then Tomoyo's. Then Eriol's again. They both have that look of recognition. My mind drifts back to what Tomoyo said this morning. A sense of sophistication. Blue eyes. English accent. No way! Could it be that Eriol is the guy Tomoyo was telling me about this morning? Is that even possible?

"What are we doing here?" Naoko asks, walking up to us and not noticing the looks being exchanged between my best friend and the new transfer student.

"I-it's you!" Tomoyo stutters out.

Looking over at Tomoyo and then to Eriol, Naoko seems to pick up on the exchange. "Do you two know each other?" she asks.

"Not exactly."

Eriol's slight surprise gives way to an earnest smile. He begins to walk towards my best friend. "So we meet again." He stops a few paces away from where the others sit. "I pray you aren't as troubled as the last time we crossed paths."

"I-I'm fine," Tomoyo says, staring up at him with a light blush across her cheeks.

"Wonderful. Pardon me, I should introduce myself." I watch, grinning like an teenage girl watching a romance movie, as Eriol kneels down on one knee in front of Tomoyo and takes her hand. "Hiiragizawa Eriol, my lady." He kisses her hand lightly. Tomoyo's face becomes red as a tomato.

This is so freaking adorable. I only just met Eriol, and I already approve.

"May I ask your name, miss?"

Flustered and stumbling over her words, Tomoyo manages to get out the words, "D-Daidouji Tomoyo."

"A pleasure, Daidouji-san." Eriol gives her a charming smile.

"Y-you can call me Tomoyo," she says with her head down.

"In that case, you may call me Eriol." With that, he rises back to his feet.

For a moment, the only noises made are from the other students in the room, who have all been watching our interactions since Chiharu threw the door open and dragged me into the room. Which reminds me, they really need to mind their own business... Although, then again, we are kind of making a scene. Chiharu is slamming things and shouting, and Eriol is going around acting like we're in the Elizabethan era or something. Did I get thrown into a Shakespearian play without my knowledge?

"Um... Well," Chiharu says, breaking the tense atmosphere. "I brought Sakura here to have lunch with us." She pulls me to her side again. Somehow I get the feeling she wants me to help her out by saying something. But, hey, _she _is the one who dragged _me_ here against my will, without even telling me why.

"What's this all about, anyways?"

"Didn't I already tell you?" She looks innocently at me. Um, no. No, you didn't.

"I think you may have overlooked that _minor_ detail."

"Oops. Well, anyways, I brought you here to eat lunch with us."

"Why?"

She starts to look uncomfortable. "I just figured," she says looking down at her feet, "that since we're all getting along together again and what not... And Tomoyo is your friend, too, but she only eats with us."

"Oh. Well, I actually usually meet up with Naoko in the library during lunch." How do I turn her down politely? I want to eat with her and everyone, but Naoko and I are getting along great, and I don't want to ruin our friendship. Then again, I don't want to turn down Chiharu's offer, either. For her to offer for me to eat lunch with everyone is something I never would've expected. If I do turn her down, I highly doubt she'll offer again.

"If that's the case, then why doesn't she just eat with us, too?" Chiharu turns to the studious girl who has been standing off to the side watching the display. "Do you want to join us?"

Naoko hesitates, looking unsure. "I don't want to be a bother."

"Not a bother at all!" Chiharu quickly assures her. "The more the merrier, right?"

"Oh, then sure. I'm Yanagisawa Naoko, by the way. You can just call me Naoko."

"In that case, you can call me Chiharu." She looks to Eriol. "Mihara Chiharu. Welcome to Tomoeda High." Then to both of them, she says with a bright smile, "Nice to meet you two!"

"Don't forget about the rest of us," Yamazaki calls from our left in the back row. Next to him, Syaoran observes the events unfolding, but remains silent. Noticing my eyes on him, he meets my gaze. For a moment we just stay like that, staring at each other, but I finally break away when I hear Rika speak.

"Well, I'm Sasaki Rika." To Naoko, she says, "We've actually met before. You helped me out when I first transferred here a few years back."

Recognition lights up Naoko's face. "I remember. It's nice to see you again. I take it you settled in alright?" She looks around at the rest of the people sitting around.

"Yes, thank you."

Naoko directs her attention to Tomoyo. "You said your name was Tomoyo?"

"Yes. Sakura is my best friend. Thank you for taking care of her." She bows her head.

"Tomoyo..." Does she really have to say it like that. "I'm not a child, you know." She waves me off.

"It's my pleasure." Naoko glances over at me and smiles. "She's wonderful company."

"Speaking of company..." I nearly jump out of my skin as Yamazaki suddenly appears before us.

"Ugh. Please, not again. I thought you were finally over this," Chiharu grumbles from my other side.

"Did you know that back in medieval times, it was considered to be good company if one brought as many lit candles with them as possible when visiting another's home? And the more candles the guest brought, the more welcomed they were."

"No, Takashi," Chiharu mumbles irritably. "We had no idea." Why is she saying that so sarcastically?

"Actually..." We all turn to find Eriol with a bright smile on his face, as usual, and a mischievous gleam in his eyes. "It proved to be quite problematic." Wait... What? Is this for real?

Back when we were younger, I used to always be the one who fell for Yamazaki's very extravagant stories; which, as it turned out, were all lies. Here I thought maybe this was another one, but if Eriol knows about it, too, then...

"The custom resulted in many fires. In order to appear as important guests, many people would balance as many candles as they could. They would balance them all the way up their arms, on their shoulders, and the daring ones would even sometimes have one or more placed on the top of their head." At this point all of us are gawking at him. Yamazaki included. "Unfortunately, many attempts to appease their hosts were utterly unsuccessful considering how many times the candles were dropped, and, as a result, there were many damages to people's homes."

A grin has been slowly forming on Yamazaki's face. "Yes, so it was soon forbidden to bring more than one candle when visiting someone's home." With the explanation complete, the six of us not involved in the telling of the tale all stare at the two, completely taken aback.

Leaning closer to Chiharu, I whisper in her ear, "Was that a true story, or another lie?"

All she can do is shake her head, mouth hanging slack.

In our stunned silence, the dark-haired boy introduces himself. "Yamazaki Takashi." He holds his hand out to Eriol, who takes it. "I have a feeling we're going to get along just fine."

"As do I," Eriol says with that same mischievous glint in his eyes.

There's another long silence that follows, but I quickly snap out of it and glance over at Syaoran, who is still sitting in the back with his cheek resting in the palm of his hand as he watches from a distance. Oh, no. He doesn't get to sit back and just watch.

Sidestepping past the others, I walk up beside Syaoran, who gives me a funny look. "You just gonna sit there, or are you going to introduce yourself?" I ask while facing the others. Chiharu glances over to us and smiles, tugging Yamazaki's uniform. Syaoran shoots me a sharp look, and I shrug. Yamazaki, however, takes over for me.

"Hey, don't just sit there. Introduce yourself!" Chiharu beckons him over, as well.

Reluctantly, Syaoran stands up. I have to take a step back to make room. He gives me another look of discontent before putting on a charming smile and walking over to the newcomers. I simply giggle. He really doesn't enjoy talking to new people, does he?

"Li Syaoran," he says in a gentleman's voice.

Walking up behind him, I watch Naoko's face light up. "Aren't you the one who's always in the top two for our class?" Syaoran gives a slow nod. "I knew it! Yanagisawa Naoko." She holds out her hand. "It's nice to finally meet my competition."

"It is. I'm a bit surprised that we haven't be before, though. You're the class president, are you not?" Leaning around Syaoran as he takes her hand, I see that his smile has given way to a more serious business look.

Naoko nods, seeming proud of the title and recognition. "I am."

As he lets go, Syaoran looks down at me and frowns as if to ask what I'm doing. I ignore him, and lean my weight against one of the desks to get a better view of everyone.

"Naoko, I don't know if I already told you, but Syaoran's the one who's been tutoring me." Her eyebrows rise.

"You didn't." She looks between us, appearing amused. To Syaoran, she says, "I've heard quite a bit about you."

This spikes his interest. He looks at me with that annoying smirk of his. "Have you?" he asks it while looking at me, but it's meant for Naoko.

Laughing, she replies, "Yes, I have. You certainly do have a way of getting under her skin." This only seems to make his smirk wider.

"You can say that again," Tomoyo says, giggling. I shoot her a dirty look.

"Yes, well, she doesn't always take too kindly to having me around." His gaze drifts back to me. "Although, then there was this morning." Rather than smirking, he smiles. The way he lifts up his arm and taps his index finger to his cheek makes it seem like he's a little embarrassed about it himself.

Remembering the events of this morning, I roll my eyes, trying to play down the fact that my cheeks are probably bright pink. At the time, a kiss on the cheek seemed like a small token of my gratitude. Then again, I probably just made him uncomfortable. I'm such an idiot.

"Oh!" Thankfully, I remember what I said to Eriol at the beginning of lunch. Turning to the blue-haired transfer student, I say, "Eriol, Syaoran is actually also my Chinese friend."

Syaoran raises his eyebrow giving me another teasing look. "How often do you go around talking about me?"

Blushing, I quickly say, "I don't! We were talking about Eriol's accent and it reminded me of when you first came to Japan." He doesn't look especially convinced.

"You did have an accent for a while," Yamazaki comments, earning himself a glare. Tomoyo and Chiharu nod in agreement, though.

Shaking his head, Syaoran turns back to Eriol. "It goes away eventually," he assures him.

There's a sharp intake of breath from somewhere to my left. Looking over, I see Tomoyo with a disappointed look on her face. It nearly makes me burst out laughing. Rika and I exchange a knowing look. Tomoyo totally has a crush on Eriol.

"Okay, now that we're all done with boring introductions, lets get back to eating!" Everyone starts to shift. Although, with all eight of us, it doesn't go too smoothly.

Syaoran turns around and steps back as I step forward. We bump awkwardly into each other. I quickly step back and try to go around him, only to have him go the same way. Seriously? He starts to step again, the same time as me. Okay, this has honestly _never_ happened to me. I glare up at him.

"What are you doing?"

"Trying to get back to my lunch."

I grind my teeth. At my expression, Syaoran rolls his eyes. Taking me by the shoulders, he turns us a full one hundred eighty degrees and then drops his hands.

Before either of us can step back, Chiharu suddenly says, "Okay, this might not work." She earns everyone's attention. "There's way too many of us and not enough space," she whines, clutching a desk to keep from falling over as she leans away to make room for everyone. "Does anyone know anywhere we could go that's a little less jam packed?"

Tomoyo, Rika and I all look at each other. "Actually," Rika begins with a delighted smile. "There is this _one_ spot."

"It's super spacious," Tomoyo chimes in.

"And nobody else is ever there," I add.

"Then lead the way."

Grinning, I spin around, only to smack my face into Syaoran's chest again. "That time was entirely your own fault," he comments.

Glaring and shaking my head, I point behind him. He smirks and turns around, walking down the isle. From behind us, I can hear a few of the others giggling. Ignoring them, I scurry into the hall.

I wait a moment for everyone to mill out of the room before leading the way down the hall with Tomoyo and Rika close behind. Looking at everyone standing together, I have to admit that there's a lot of us. Eight in total. Kind of insane. I went from having lunch with one to two people at the the most, to having so many people that we can't all properly fit inside of a classroom without running into each other and making a ton of noise.

When we finally reach the roof, everyone clusters around the door, looking out at the empty space.

"Wow. Who would've guessed," Chiharu mumbles.

Beside her, Naoko asks, "Why isn't anyone up here? It's so nice."

I shrug. "Not sure. A lot of people don't know how to even get here, and those who do just _don't_. Kind of strange, but I try not to question it. It's a great view, after all." And it is. Really, the view up here is probably the best I know about. It's been a while since I was last up here, too. I almost forgot how relaxing it is.

"Well, it's perfect," Chiharu says, walking up beside me. I return her smile. Looking around at the many faces, new and old, around me, I have to admit... It really _is_ perfect.

* * *

**So there you have it. Chapter 18. Next chapter will probably focus on school life again. Sakura's family is going to be back, but not right away.**

**Oh, and that thing that Yamazaki was saying was totally random. Not at all true, of course. It's weird, I know, but I'm not very good at coming up with that sort of thing.**

**Anyways, see you again next chapter. Bye!**


	19. Accident in the Park

**OHOHOHOHOHOH! That's my atempt at Tomoyo's laugh. It's a work in progress.**

**Back to business, this chapter is... Eventful. Mostly near the end. Has a lot of SxS. And it's even longer than last chapter! I think it's the second or third longest so far.**

**By the way, Syaoran refers to Tomoyo as Daidouji in this chapter. I honestly can't remember if I had him call her Tomoyo before. If it's weird or confusing for anyone, you can just tell me and I'll change it.**

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

"So let me get this straight," Chiharu begins, snatching up a celery stick from Takashi's boxed lunch. "You transferred to _Tomoeda_, _Japan_ from _London_, _England_ mid-way through your _senior_ year of high school."

Eriol nods.

"Yeah, now that I think about it, didn't you say something about a family matter?" Naoko Yanagisawa, the girl who is apparently a friend of Sakura, sits beside Chiharu and accepts the green vegetable offered to her.

"Yes. My grandfather has been ill for a while now, but his condition has gotten worse, so I came home to Japan."

While Eriol talks, I let my eyes drift to where his admirer sits. Yes, his admirer. The guy hasn't even been here a full day, yet it sure looks like Daidouji is already in love with him. Kind of odd. Although, I'm not complaining. When Chiharu dragged Sakura into the room with the blue-haired boy close behind, my immediate reaction was, 'Who is this guy, and how does he know Sakura?' Of course, the second I saw him and Daidouji looking at each other, I realized that his relationship with Sakura wasn't going to be something I'd have to worry about.

Which reminds me...

My eyes shift from Daidouji to the emerald-eyed girl sitting beside her.

What does Sakura think of all this? Daidouji is her best friend, after all. If Daidouji and Eriol start dating, Daidouji won't have as much time to talk to Sakura. If that happens, maybe she'll talk to me...

Damn. That sounded _really_ selfish, didn't it? Sakura needs all the support she can get. What the hell is that girl doing to me, anyways?

I smack my face, earning me a mixture of troubled and amused looks.

"You alright over there, Syaoran?"

"Wonderful," I grumble. Wonderful except for the fact that every single thought I have seems to lead me back to Sakura who is currently looking at me with raised eyebrows.

Meeting her eyes, I have to resist the urge to smack myself in the face again. I'm sitting over here having a dilemma because of her, and she's just sitting there, totally oblivious. Well, as much is to be expected from Sakura.

* * *

Now that thing have finally started to settle down, I can't get my mind off of what Sakura said to me that one time.

_"Graduating isn't going to do me any good."_

Even though she told me to pretend she never said anything, I can't. Now that I'm not thinking about how to get her to open up to me, I keep finding my thoughts drifting off to Sakura finishing high school. In the end, no matter what I'm always thinking about Sakura in some way. It's totally unfair. I'm almost inclined to think she does it on purpose.

Back to the matter at hand, though. Sakura passed all of her exams, so I'd like to think that maybe she's realized that she should hold out until graduation. Still, I'd feel more comfortable if I could actually talk to her about it...

Hm...

I wonder... Sakura will probably be super pissed off if I just straight out ask her about it, but then again... I _do_ have a knack for making her talk, or so it would seem. And by knack, I mean the ability to pester her about something until she finally caves. Not the most tactful method, but it seems to work. Although, I would prefer it if she voluntarily talked to me about it. Who knows, maybe she will... As unrealistically optimistic as that sounds.

Guess I'll just have to find out.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Ah, finally done work. This week has been excruciatingly long. Only at work, though. Eating lunch with seven other people more or less brightens the day. Especially when it's done while sitting on the roof of a building where the view is supreme. There's even a show! Everyday there's a range of adorable interactions between Tomoyo and Eriol. Seriously, Tomoyo fawns over almost every single word that comes out of his mouth. As for Eriol, he seems to find her quite captivating as well.

At nearly every chance he gets, Eriol is by her side reciting poetry. Well, I call it poetry because it sounds so deep and meaningful, but according to Naoko, that's not it. I'm fairly certain only Eriol can get away with it. Normally, I would assume the guy's a total flirt, but everybody can see that when she's not looking, Eriol gazes at Tomoyo as if she's a priceless jewel that'll make all his troubles fly away.

I'll admit, I'm a little envious. As happy as I am for her, watching the two of them and seeing the way they look at each other makes me wish I had someone like that. Every time I try to imagine someone like that for me, a certain Chinese 'friend' of mine pops into my mind. And he's always smirking at me as if he _knows_ I'm thinking about him.

Stupid, annoying...

I open the door to the back of the cafe and look up.

Great, now I'm having hallucinations of him, too? You've gotta be kidding me. And, once again, he's got that smirk on his face!

"Well, that's just spectacular," I mumble as I lock the door behind me. "Apparently now I have to worry about my imagination, as well. Did I not get enough sleep last night?" I mumble questionably to myself as I walk past the hallucination, not even bothering to turn my head.

"You'd probably know the answer to that a lot better than I would," an amused voice calls from behind me. I freeze.

Oh, please tell me-

"Aren't you going to say hello to your favorite Chinese friend?" Syaoran appears beside me, smiling contently. And, yes, he is, indeed, _smiling_. Not smirking. _Smiling_. Clearly, he's trying to play the innocent card.

"You're my _only_ Chinese friend, Syaoran." I turn and begin walking again. Of course, Syaoran feels the need to follow.

"That still makes me your favorite."

"By default."

"It counts."

"Uh-huh. Wouldn't that also make you my _least_ favorite Chinese friend?"

"But by default, of course."

"Yeah. _That's_ why."

"Oh, how cold." He grasps painfully at the center of his chest. "You wound me, Sakura."

"How terribly sorry I am," I say indifferently. Dropping whole act thing, I glance over at him and ask, "What are you doing here, anyways?"

"Oh, that's right," he says, his eyes lighting up. "I wanted to talk to you."

"We see each other every day during lunch."

"Yeah, but I wanted to do it in private."

I'm going to ignore the fact that my heart just skipped a beat. "What for?" I ask, trying my best to sound nonchalant.

After a moment of silence, I glance over at Syaoran. Oh, no. Why is he making that face? Why does he look nervous?

Seeing my perplexed look, he laughs lightly and runs a hand through his hair. "Sorry, I'm not really sure where to start."

"Mind giving me a general overview? Some sort of subject at least?"

"Well..." His hand pauses on the top of his head. "Do you remember how that one time you were late for tutoring, so I went to your house and got you?"

"Of course. I came down in my pajamas and you looked at me like I had two heads." That, and it was the day after I found out that my father had been sent to prison.

Syaoran laughs. "I'm surprised you remember that. You looked half asleep at the time."

"I'm very perceptive."

He gives me a doubtful look.

"Oh, shut up."

"I didn't say anything."

"You were thinking it." He just shakes his head in surrender. "Anyways, you were saying? I'm sure you didn't want to talk to me about my pajamas."

His smirk returns. "They did look rather soft." I lightly slap his arm. "Alright, alright. I actually wanted to talk to you about what you said while we were walking to school. That graduating wasn't going to do you any good."

There's a brief pause in my steps during which Syaoran casts me a worried look, but I continue on as if nothing happened. "It's complicated."

"I figured." He pauses. "Do you still want to drop out?"

I sigh. "Syaoran..."

"No, Sakura, look." He grabs my hand, forcing me to come to a stop and face him. "It's been bothering me for a while now, and I really want to talk to you about it. I know that I can't force you to change your mind, but I don't think you realize just how serious this is."

"Syaoran." I try to stop him, but he goes on.

"And you passed midterms. That has to prove something. You already made it over one milestone. There's only half a year left now."

"Syaoran." My hand tightens around his. This time his mouth snaps shut. "I've thought about dropping out of school several times, and quite frankly, if it weren't for my brother, I probably would've done just that a long time ago." My words just seem to make him even more panicked. "But I didn't. And unless something changes, I won't."

This time when he looks at me, it's not the same panicked look, but rather something much more sympathetic and concerned. Very quietly he asks, "Your father?"

I nod. "I assume you've heard the rumors."

His eyes downcast, Syaoran nods.

"Well," I say in a much lighter tone, trying to break the tension, "I don't know exactly everything people say, but they're probably all true."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

The question makes me stop. _Do_ I want to talk to him about it? It's true what I said about how I miss talking to him like we used to, but after all this time, to just open up completely... Is it strange that I want to? Is it strange that I want to pull him aside and just let the words spill from my mouth? I want to; I really do. It scares me a little by how easily I talk to him. How natural it feels.

"Are you willing to listen?"

For some reason, Syaoran smiles. "Sakura, I've _wanted_ to listen for as long as I can remember."

"I'll never understand that about you."

"What do you mean?"

"Why you listen to me. Heck, I don't even get why you put up with me in general."

"I thought that would've been obvious."

"Is it?"

"Yeah." His smile stops my heart. "We're friends."

For a long moment I just stand there starting at him, too stunned to move. I don't think I'm ever going to get used to hearing him say that.

Syaoran leans down and peers into my eyes with a questioning look. "Right?"

All I can do is nod and try not to let myself get lost in the pools of amber that are now mere inches away.

"I'm glad." He stands up straight again, and I almost begin to feel myself fall forward into him a bit, but quickly lean my weight back so that I don't. "Hey, are you alright?"

"Huh? Yeah, fine." Not. Why does he have to have such an effect on me? It's not fair. Not in the slightest. "I was just thinking."

"Well then, let's talk about it," he says gently. He must just assume that I'm thinking about my dad. Not about to correct that.

I nod in agreement, but then glance around. "Can we go somewhere else, though?" Syaoran glances over his shoulder then turns back with a nod.

* * *

In under ten minutes, we find ourselves within sight of Penguin Park.

"We used to come here all the time, didn't we?" I wonder, mostly to myself, as I wander over to the King Penguin and gaze up at it.

"Yeah," Syaoran mumbles from somewhere behind me.

My eyes travel to the metal bars that form a rectangular climbing area. With a laugh, I reminisce, "Didn't you used to love this thing?" I walk over to it with Syaoran close behind.

"Sure. What kid wouldn't?"

"You climbed trees, too." My fingers run over the cold metal.

"So? They've got nice views. You should try it sometime."

I glance back at him. "I think I will." With the flick of the wrist, I order, "Turn around."

He raises an eyebrow. "Why? You aren't actually going to climb that, are you?"

"I am." Reaching down, I readjust my skirt. "And since I'm wearing this, you have to turn around."

With an eye-roll, he faces away from me. "Happy?"

"Much better." I grab onto one of the bars and begin to hoist myself up.

"Remind me again how old you are."

"Hey, don't even go there. We're the same age, remember?"

"Actually, no. Sometimes I forget. You sure act childish."

"Why you-" Holding onto the highest bar, I lean around to glare at his back. "Get up here so that I can pummel you."

"We both know you're too much of a softie to do anything like that." Still, he starts to turn around, making me shout.

"Gah! Stop, no! I'm not there yet!" Thankfully, he pauses, and I spring back into action.

"Geez, how long does it take you to climb that thing?"

"Oh, shut it." I quickly pull myself up onto the uppermost bar and sit down on it. "Like you could do it any faster."

"Is that a challenge?" Um, no, because if it were, I know that I would most definitely lose.

"You bet it is." Damn you, mouth! Stop betraying me.

Before I have time to take it back, Syaoran turns around and grabs the bar that I'm sitting on. Which is the top. I really hate it when he proves me wrong.

With a singe strong jerk of the arm, he's already a good halfway up. I roll my eyes and look away, shaking my head.

"Showoff," I mutter as he twists around next to me and sits facing the same direction. He may piss me off sometimes, but right now all I can think about is the fact that he sat so close that our arms are less than half a foot apart.

Next to me, he chuckles. "Shouldn't have challenged the master."

"What was it that the 'master' was saying just a minute ago about how climbing was childish?" He nudges me playfully with his elbow. My grip on the bar tightens. "Hey there, I'd appreciate it if you didn't try to knock me off."

The structure is only around seven feet tall or so, but there's still a good five feet between the very tips of my toes and the ground.

"You aren't going to fall, Sakura."

"Right. And if I do?" My eyes drift to the ground below us.

"Then I'll just catch you." The words make my heart stop. If I fall, he'll catch me. Even though he doesn't mean it that way, I find myself thinking of me falling in love with him all over again. And him being there, arms wide open, waiting for me.

With a sigh, I shove the images from my mind. "How do you plan to catch me when you're up here, too?"

With a tender touch, Syaoran's hand covers mine on the cold metal. My eyes flick up to meet his. He leans closer to me, leaving a negligible amount of space between us.

"I'm right here, Sakura. And there's no way I'd let you fall."

Staring into his eyes, I almost find myself saying something I'd regret. Something like: too late.

But I don't. Instead, I force my eyes away from his.

My hand twitches slightly as he pulls his hand away once more and sets it beside mine on the bar so that they're still touching.

Clearing his throat, Syaoran says, "So we're here for a reason, right?" His voice lowers a little bit. "You still want to talk about it? I'm not trying to pressure you."

"I know. And yeah. You deserve to hear the truth from me, and not some random gossiping classmates." Tucking my ankles behind one of the lower bars for support, I tilt my head back to gaze up and watch as fluffy white clouds move slowly across the vast cerulean sky. "Do you remember how he was before all of this?"

Syaoran nods out of the corner of my eye. "Of course. Both he and your mother were always welcoming when I came over."

I can't hide the smile that plays at my lip. My eyes flutter closed as I recall the memories. "I suppose they were." My eyelids rise once more, pulling me back to reality. "But after my mom died, he changed. It's true what everybody says about the drinking. I don't even know when the last time I actually spoke more than a few words to him was. He's almost never sober. That's actually how he lost his job. He showed up to the university drunk. That was over six and a half years ago. He's been unemployed ever since."

"Are you and your brother," he pauses, "alright?" The conversation reminds me of the one I just recently had with Wei.

I let out a dry laugh. "We get by. Touya has a job at a sporting goods store, and, as you know, I work at Twin Bells. Our situation isn't exactly ideal, but we get by." My thumb runs over the seam at the end of my skirt. "None of us were the same after my mom died, but at least Touya and I were able to move on. For my dad, it's like his entire world stopped. I can't say I blame him, though." I turn my eyes to look at Syaoran again, who is already watching me. "Surely you saw the way they looked at each other, right?" My voice sounds almost pleading.

He simply nods and I look away again, letting my lids fall.

"They were so in love. I've never seen any two people look at each other the same way that they did. I can't even begin to imagine..." My grip on the bars tighten until the knuckles begin to turn white. "To lose someone who means _that_ _much_..." My throat constricts. "It's not fair," I whisper, shaking my head.

Syaoran starts to move, but before he can, I turn my head and capture amber eyes in an intense gaze. "Can I tell you a secret, Syaoran? Something even Tomoyo doesn't know about?" He stares at me, astonished. It's as if he can't believe something of the sort even exists. He's must figure that for Tomoyo not to know automatically makes it deadly serious.

"You can tell me anything, Sakura," he assures me.

As my lips part, the words don't come out, so I turn away from him again. "After..." I shut my eyes and take in a deep breath. "After graduation," I say, my eyes drifting off into the distance, "Touya wants to leave and start over."

Syaoran's hand tenses beside me. "What do you mean?"

"Exactly what it sounds like I mean. Leaving our father. He always talks about how one day we'll be able to live on our own and not have to support him anymore." I laugh lightly. "It actually sounds nice sometimes."

"Sometimes?"

I nod. "Leaving our father means leaving Tomoeda. Everything." I finally look at him. "You said that this was where your life was, remember?" Surprised, he nods. "Well it's the same for me. This place is all I know. Starting over sounds nice, but I would never be able to forget what I'd left behind. All of my friends. Before this year, it was just Tomoyo, but now..." I bite my lip. "Now it's so much more. I just keep on meeting new people and making more friends. Not to mention my father."

Tears begin to form in the corners of my eyes, and my voice grows shaky. "I know I shouldn't care so much what happens to him. He doesn't even care about me or Touya. He hasn't cared about anyone except for himself ever since mom died. Touya resents him because of it.

"Maybe that's why I wanted to get closer to Rika; because I thought that if I had more attachment, I wouldn't be able to leave. I could change Touya's mind without ever letting him know that it's not just my friends and the memories that I can't leave behind. But in the end, when I inevitably have to go away with Touya, I'm hurting that many more people." Just like that, the tears begin to fall.

Beside me, Syaoran shifts and a comforting arm wraps around my shoulders. In response, I lean into him and press my cheek against his shoulder.

"They deserve to know, Sakura. If not everyone, then at least Daidouji." His thumb gently rubs my arm.

"I know... But I'm afraid that by telling her, I'll be making it real."

Syaoran's body shakes against me as he laughs. It's brief and somehow sounds sad, but still comforting. "That sure sounds familiar."

"What..." I trail off, knowing the answer. "Oh."

"Yeah. It's not easy, but as you know, not telling her could hurt your friendship. You'll hurt her more by not telling her and having her find out on her own than you will by coming forward and explaining the situation."

I nod against him, reaching up and wiping my cheeks with the back of my hand.

"Besides," he says, lightening the mood, "now that you've told me, you have practice."

Laughing, I say, "Yeah, I suppose." Then I pull away. My eyes meet Syaoran's as he withdraws his arm from around me.

It surprises me when he offers me his hand, holding it palm-up between us. I look up to find him smiling so tenderly that I almost melt. My eyes travel down once more to his hand. Open and inviting. So, I uncurl my fingers from the bar and carefully slip my hand in his. It feels so right. So natural. Although, every single touch, from the accidental grazing of our elbows to the intentional warm embraces, feels natural.

We both look away then. A comfortable silence settles between us.

After a few minutes of simply enjoying each other's presence, I decide to speak. "Hey, Syaoran?"

Neither of us moves, but he replies, "Yes, Sakura?" My lips tug upwards as he says my name.

"When I leave, will you still talk to me?"

I hold my breath waiting for his answer. "Yes."

"And you won't... You won't grow to resent me?"

This time he looks over at me. I don't move, too afraid of what I'd see.

"Why would I?"

Ashamed, I drop my gaze. "Because when you left, I resented you."

"Sakura, the circumstances were totally different. We're older now. We've been through it once. Aren't people always telling us to learn from our mistakes?"

"Still... I would understand if you did."

"Do you _want_ me to?"

"No!" I shake my head furiously. "I would never want you to hate me." My heart throbs painfully.

"That's not possible. Even if I wanted to, I could never hate you, Sakura."

My breath catches and I finally look up at him. He looks at me with tender eyes and an earnest smile. Not meaning to, I find myself shaking my head in awe. "Why do you want to be friends with someone like me, Syaoran?"

His eyes widen a little at the question and I can tell that I've stumped him. He opens his mouth, but no words come out. It's actually kind of cute the way he fumbles for what to say. Something crosses his face for a moment. I feel my heart rate speed up as he looks at me with a dead serious face. His eyes study my face then rest in line with my own.

There's something he wants to say, that much I know, but as Syaoran's face softens, I can tell he isn't going to tell me. He pulls away slightly, but doesn't look away.

"Because you didn't give up on me. Even when everybody else gave up on me. You were my first real friend, Sakura."

His words warm my heart, and I find myself grinning like an idiot. "I think that's the sweetest thing I've ever heard you say!" Totally forgetting that we're sitting on a bar that's only two inch in diameter, I throw both of my arms around the amber-eyed boy.

"Woah!" Not expecting it, Syaoran sways and grabs the bar behind us.

"Oops!" I quickly pull away. "Sorry." I smile innocently.

Pulling himself upright again, he gives me a reassuring smile. "No worries. We should probably get going, though. The sun is gonna start to set soon." He starts to move, but I quickly stop him.

"Nope!" I thrust my arm out in front of him. Pointing to my lap, I state, "Still wearing a skirt."

He gives me a funny look. "What's the big deal?" He raises his eyebrow suspiciously and glances down at my lap. "You _are_ wearing underwear, right?"

My entire face feels like I've been sitting out in the sun on a hot summer day without sunscreen. "What?" I choke out. Sputtering, I shout, "Of course I am! How can you even ask me something like that?" And with a straight face, nonetheless!

"I just don't see what you're freaking out about. I'm not going to intentionally look up your skirt." Then he frowns. "Please tell me you don't actually think I'd ever do anything like that."

"It's not about whether or not you would, it's the concept, Syaoran. The concept!"

A very low whistle follows. "Well, _someone_ is losing her mind."

"You're the one going around asking people if they're wearing underwear!" Just to tease him, I say in a low voice, "And besides, even if I weren't, do you really think that I would tell you?" At this, Syaoran's face turns slightly red, making me burst out laughing.

Syaoran shoots a glare in my direction and before I can stop him, pushes away from the metal bar. He lands very gracefully on the ground and turns around, looking up at me.

"Are you coming down, or what?"

My eyebrows twitch. "Why you..." Best I don't finish that sentence. "Turn around!"

Chuckling, Syaoran obeys. "As you wish, your highness."

"Oh, are we back to titles, my humble manservant?" I question playfully as I carefully descend from the structure.

"Only if your grace wishes it so."

With his hand over his eyes, Syaoran turns around again. Peeking over a single finger, he sees me with my back to the bars and drops his hand. Before I can protest, he crosses his arms and asks, "What in the world do you think you're doing?"

I glare at him ready to bite his head off. "Getting down from this thing. What does it look like?" I snap, halting my movement and straightening my legs. He's lucky that I'm far enough down that he can't see anything. If I were any farther up, I'd probably claw his eyes out. Thank you, school board, for making the skirts of our uniforms so insanely long.

"With your back to the bars?"

"Oh, just shut it."

Before I can tell him to turn back around, Syaoran steps forward, reaches up and firmly grips either side of my waist. My entire body warms at the touch.

"What are you-"

He gently pulls me towards him, not giving me time to finish. I quickly let go of the bars behind me and clutch his shoulders. As he lowers me, my body naturally gravitates towards his.

Our eyes lock.

All I see is him. The warm look as he pulls me down. The depth of his amber pools. The lips that suddenly look way more kissable than they did a few minutes ago.

Even as my feet touch the ground, I don't move. I _can't_ move. It's like he's a magnet. All I want to do is pull him even closer. His hands don't move from their hold on me. My hands, unlike his, do move. Not in a good way, though. They slip down from his shoulders and rest weakly on the front of his shirt.

Warning bells chime in the back of my head. You're too close, Sakura. Too close. Too intimate. Pull away.

Syaoran's face seems to get nearer and nearer, and my eyelids grow heavy.

Move before you do something you regret!

I can feel his breath on my lips.

"Hey, mommy, those people are about to kiss!" The high-pitched voice of a child calls from somewhere near the park entrance.

Alarmed, I briskly pull away. The metal bars behind me suddenly seem to be the only thing keeping me upright. My knees feel like gelatin.

Thankfully, I'm not the only one embarrassed. Even Syaoran is blushing.

The hands drop from my waist and he turns to his side, looking over to where the voice came from. At the entrance of the park is a young boy, no older than seven, holding the hand of a woman in her early thirties.

"Come on, sweetie, let's go." The woman pulls her son's hand. The child follows reluctantly behind, but continues to watch Syaoran and I as he goes.

I count the seconds as the pair disappears from sight. Syaoran's gaze drops to the ground for a moment before I feel him look at me.

Oh, well, would you look at that! There's a spot on my shoe that suddenly looks oddly interesting.

I have absolutely _no_ idea what to say to him! What the heck is there to say? Joke about how the kid must be losing his mind? Nope. Not when he was right. As much as I would like to pretend that's not what was about to happen, I can't.

"I should get home before Touya starts to freak," I quickly blurt out, sidestepping Syaoran and briskly walking towards the entrance of the park.

"Do you want me to-"

"Nope," I call back hoarsely. "I'll be fine. See you on Monday!"

Get out of the park.

Get out of the park.

Get out of the park.

"Pah!" The second I round the corner, I fall back against one of the trees. Raising a hand to my face, I nearly burn my fingers.

This is bad. This is really, really bad.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

I fall back on my bed with a thud.

"Ugh." What the _hell_ was I thinking? Did I really almost... Of all the stupid, irresponsible things. It's clear that I wasn't thinking, because if I were, I wouldn't have let the situation get so out of hand. Really, I should never have helped her down. It was stupid, but the way that she had her back against the the bars just made me want to pull her close to me.

After she opened up to me, I just wanted to be there for her. Boy, did I mess _that_ up. Sakura was comfortable enough to open up and talk to me about her family. That's perhaps her most touchy subject, and she actually told me about it. I must be doing _something_ right. Although, I'm pretty sure trying to kiss her isn't it. Talk about a shitty friend.

Although a 'friend' isn't all I want to be to her, as selfish as it may be.

I cover my face with the back of my arm.

This is getting out of hand. If we hadn't been interrupted, who knows what I would've done. I don't know if I should be thanking that kid or wishing he'd never shown up. Then again, what would have happened if I _had_ kissed her? What then? I've already broken her heart once. There's no way that she'd give me a second chance.

But, damn it, why didn't she pull away? If she doesn't even _try_ to stop me, there's nothing to keep me from slipping up. She _had_ to have noticed me leaning in, but instead of pulling away or yelling at me, or doing something- anything- to stop me, she just stood there. I mean, is she really so dense that she didn't realize what I was about to do? If so, then I'm screwed. First thing's first, though; I _really_ need to practice more self-restraint.

* * *

**Haha. Are you guys happy, or pissed that I did that? Hopefully happy.**

**Oh my gosh! Almost forgot, but for any Tsubasa fans out there, apparently Clamp is releasing a new series at the end of August. I couldn't find any details on what it's about or how long it'll be, but if anyone knows, tell me. *Smiles sheepishly* Writing this story has made me a total Tsubasa freak. I didn't even like the show when I first started writing this, but now I'm in love with it... Not that you guys really care about that. If anyone is interested, I'm blabbing on and on about it in my profile. By the way: It's manga. Not anime. Feel like I should clarify that.**

**Sorry, got slightly sidetracked. Tell me your thoughts on the chapter if you want to! I read all of them, even though I don't reply. Although, nobody really asks me questions...**

**Gotta go. Bye! See ya next chapter!**


	20. E&T's First Date

**I'm already up to twenty chapters! That's like... A lot. Well, it is for me. Kind of a big deal. Not as big as when I reach 100,000 words, though. That's going to be a big deal. Not too far away, either.**

**This is a Tomoyo and Eriol chapter. Sakura and Syaoran are still in it and all, but T&amp;E are the ones with things going on. So if you're a fan of them, this chapter is for you.**

**Oh! So, last chapter- or maybe it was even before that- I read comments on how the characters don't respect each other's privacy, so... For those of you who think that, you'll love this chapter. And by love, I mean hate. Just one part. I think it's funny, though.**

**Before I forget, the second time it's Sakura's POV, it starts out with talking, but I don't say _who_ is speaking. Just to be clear, you don't need to know unless I use a name.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Alright, Sakura, you can do this. Just go in there and say good morning. It's not the end of the world. All you've gotta do is say, 'Good morning, Syaoran'. It's as simple as that. You can do this.

With that final thought, I energetically push aside the classroom door and enter with a face grin plastered on my face.

Oh, crap. Where is Tomoyo? My plan doesn't work without her here!

Alright, time for Plan B.

"Good morning, Syaoran!" I say loudly as I set my things down and take a seat.

Syaoran looks up from the book he's reading and meets my eyes. From the looks of it, I'd say that he didn't notice me walk up. "Good morning, Sakura. You're here rather early, aren't you?"

"Yeah, well, I actually stopped by the art room for a while. By the way, have you seen Tomoyo yet today?"

"Um, no. She might've been here," he says, looking over at her desk, "but if she was, she didn't say anything."

"Oh, I see..."

Silence.

No! No! No! I didn't plan this far ahead. What am I supposed to do now? Okay, think, Sakura, think! Something! Anything!

"So, whatcha reading?" Smooth. Mental self-five.

Syaoran frowns and lifts up the book. It's only as he's lifting it that I realize it isn't a normal book. Way too big. "I'm just going ahead reading some of the upcoming chapters."

I gawk at him in a mixture of horror and disgust. "You're reading ahead? Why in the world would you do _that_?"

"Just getting a head start. I find it easier to follow along when I have a general idea of what we're doing first. Plus, if I have any questions, I can just ask during the lesson." I don't think I've ever heard Syaoran ask a single question. Not that I'm going to point something like that out.

"Makes sense, I guess. Although it sounds excruciatingly boring."

"Yeah, it kind of is," he agrees with a broad smile.

Ah. This isn't so bad. I don't know what I was worrying about before. It's as if nothing ever happened on Friday. Heck, maybe it didn't. Could I have imagined the almost-kiss? Oh well, I guess it doesn't matter.

"You should try reading an actual _book_. I've tried it before. It's quite nice."

He gives me an odd look. "You don't say."

"Yeah. While I was eating in the library, I was also reading. Got through an entire book."

"Did you?" Is that sarcasm I detect?

"I did. Naoko could probably find something for you. If you want."

"I'll consider it."

"You should," I insist. "She has an infinite knowledge of books."

"Well, I know where to find her." His smile doesn't quite reach his eyes as he redirects his attention to the book in front of him.

Turning around, I grin to myself. Nailed it.

* * *

**Tomoyo's POV**

"Eriol-kun! Good morning!" I race into classroom 3-A with a huge smile. I got here early specifically to talk with Eriol. He's on morning duty this week.

"Tomoyo-hime. You're here early."

Kya! Eriol seems to have taken up the habit of calling me princess. Not all the time, but when he does, I find it so adorable that I start blushing like mad.

"I-I wanted to see you," I mumble, shyly twirling my hair. "Do you mind if I help?"

"If you'd like to."

"I think I would." Giggling like an idiot, I pick up some chalk from the board and begin writing the date. "So, Eriol-kun, how are settling into Tomoeda?"

"Very well. There are times I miss my home in England, but the people here are kind and welcoming." He says it while looking at me, and I find myself blushing even harder than I was when he greeted me.

"It makes me happy to hear that."

We continue our conversation, shifting from one topic to another until other students start to file in. It isn't until a few minutes before the final bell rings that I leave.

Secretly, the thing I'm looking forward to most is lunch when I get to see him again.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

"They totally like each other."

"Totally."

"It's almost hard to watch."

"Well, I think it's sweet."

"Yeah, but it's also kind of awkward. I have no idea what to say to them."

"None of us do. Why do you think we're sitting over here gossiping like a bunch of schoolgirls."

"Because we _are_ a bunch of schoolgirls?"

"Speak for yourselves."

"Why are you even here, Takashi?"

"Because those two," Yamazaki says, jerking his thumb in the direction of Tomoyo and Eriol, "are in their own little world, and Syaoran is being moody again."

"I can hear you."

"I know, that's why I'm saying it."

"In what way am I being 'moody'?"

"Dude, you're _always_ moody. You're just worse today for some reason."

"What the hell does that even mean?"

"You two, knock it off," Chiharu snaps.

Both of them grumble, but back off, nonetheless.

"Back to the matter at hand." We redirect our attention to the pair sitting a ways away from us.

"Those two are... Those two are..."

"Spit it out!"

"They're just so cute together!"

We all sweat drop. "Naoko..."

Immune to the rest of us, Naoko goes on. "It's like a story taking place right in front of us! Don't you see how exciting this is?" She questions with stars in her eyes.

All of us, excluding Tomoyo and Eriol, are currently sitting a corner of the roof watching the two lovebirds talk and flirt with one-another. Well, mostly. Syaoran has been sitting off to the side, staring at the rest of us like we've lost our minds. Maybe we have. Although, the only reason why we're sitting here talking about them is because none of us actually know what to say. Yamazaki was right; those two really are in their own little world.

"If this keeps up, are we going to have to sit in a corner and eat like this every day?"

"Now that I think about it, how have they not noticed that we're all sitting over here away from them?"

"Strange, isn't it?"

"Very curious. Very curious, indeed."

"Is this all you girls talk about?"

"Still a guy."

"Sure you are," Syaoran agrees sarcastically while snickering.

Yamazaki glares at him and challenges, "If you want to talk about something else, why not pitch in?"

"Nah, I'm good." He brings a water bottle to his lips and swings his arm back, taking a few long gulps. His hair falls away from his face, and along his neck, his adam's apple moves with each gulp of water. I try not to stare, but totally fail.

Good grief, he's hot. Whatever it is he's doing, it shouldn't legal. I know we're sitting in the sun, but come on! Isn't it autumn? You don't need to be drinking so much damn water, Syaoran! Screw hydration! He can shrivel up like a grape into a raisin for all I care. Whatever it takes to make him stop looking like a damn male model.

It's like he's trying make people swoon over him. Thankfully, the four other girls on the roof don't seem to notice. For some reason, I'm the only one effected by it. Probably because Tomoyo is flirting; Chiharu is in love with Yamazaki; Rika just sees him as a classmate, and Naoko is way more interested in watching other people's romances unfold than her own.

"Are you always this reserved, Li?"

Syaoran looks at Naoko and shrugs.

"You can take that as a yes," I tell her. "Syaoran isn't exactly a social butterfly, if you know what I mean."

"I'll take that as a compliment. In case you didn't notice, most people don't want to be compared butterflies."

"You are mistaken, my friend," I say sounding like a wise elderly person- which I most definitely am not. Holding up my index finger, I go on. "Most of the _male_ _population_ doesn't want to be compared to butterflies."

"While we're on the topic of butterflies, did any of you know-"

"Oh, no, you don't!" Chiharu quickly shuts poor Yamazaki up before he can finish what would most likely turn out to be another one of his elaborate tales. "What's gotten into you lately, Takashi? I thought you were finally over the whole telling lies twenty-four seven thing."

Smiling mischievously, Yamazaki asks, "Have you noticed the sudden increase in people we're having lunch with?"

"Of course I- Wait! This is about your audience?" Chiharu slaps her face and groans. "You've gotta be kidding me."

"On the contrary; I am totally serious."

"You're going to scare everyone away!"

"Actually, I find the stories quite interesting."

Chiharu hangs her head. "Please don't encourage him, Naoko-chan," she pleads helplessly.

As I watch my friends interact, I find myself smiling. It's refreshing that everyone is able to get along so well. At first I wasn't sure whether or not Naoko would want to eat with myself and the others rather than reading in the library. She seems to be getting along well with Rika and Chiharu, though.

I've also noticed that Chiharu has been happier lately. Her parents are still going through the process of getting a divorce, so I'd assume her home life isn't particularly pleasant. Thankfully, while she's here will all of her friends, she laughs a lot.

Rika has always been cheerful and outgoing, so she gets along well with all seven of us. Even Syaoran talks to her sometimes.

As for Yamazaki, he's been telling us all sorts of stories. Eriol even pitches in when he's not already with Tomoyo. Clearly Yamazaki is having the time of his life, because he's always grinning whenever he's talking.

It is also quite apparent that Tomoyo and Eriol are enjoying themselves. If they're not flirting, they're sneaking desirable glances at each other. Most of the time it's adorable, but when I'm trying to talk to Tomoyo and she's not listening to me, it can get kind of irritating.

Last- but most certainly not least- is Syaoran. He's actually been doing quite well for someone who doesn't typically like talking to people he doesn't know. Then again, he's known most of us for a while, except for Naoko and Eriol.

Naoko sometimes talks to him about school. I don't know what exactly about, because I tune out. Mainly study tactics and exams. Smart people stuff.

He and Yamazaki sometimes sit off to the side with Eriol. It's a guy thing, I assume. When the three of them aren't around, the rest of us have 'girl's talk time', a name dubbed by none other than Chiharu.

Hard to believe that it's only the sixth day we're all getting together as a group to eat lunch. I'd say that I could get used to it, but I already have.

* * *

**Tomoyo's POV**

As Wednesday's lunch draws to an end, I find myself already anxiously awaiting tomorrow's lunch. Twenty-three more hours. Maybe I'll go to sleep early tonight.

"Tomoyo-san!" I turn around almost a little too excitedly at the sound of my name coming from Eriol's lips.

"Yes, Eriol-kun?"

"May I steal you away for a minute?"

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! We were just talking most of lunch. What could he have to talk to me about that he couldn't have said during the hour we were eating lunch?

"You may."

I follow him away from the senior hall and the other students hurrying to class.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about?"

"Actually, I have a question for you. I know that we've only just met, and I don't mean to sound too forward, but would you care to let me escort you to dinner sometime?"

Oh my gosh. Did I just hear him right? Did he just ask me out to dinner? As in a date? Is this really happening? Am I dreaming?

Pointing a finger to my chest, I manage to ask, "Me?"

Eriol chuckles. "Yes, you."

"To dinner?"

"That's what I had in mind, but anything will do. Just so long as it's with you."

My face feels like it's on fire. "U-um... Sure." His head falls slightly sideways. "I-I mean yes. Definitely yes. I'd like that very much."

Eriol's face immediately lights back up and his smile grows even wider. "Great. We'll talk about the details tomorrow, then?"

"Sure." He smiles ever brighter now, this time with a playful glint in his midnight blue eyes. "I mean yes. Until tomorrow, then."

We head back to our respective classes and reluctantly part ways. I have a _lot_ to tell Sakura about.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Green. Yellow. Blue. Red- No, no! Too much red! Too much red!

"Damn it! No!"

"Having some trouble?"

I sigh. "Yeah. Messed up the balance. I'll still be able to fix it, though." Hold up. I spin around and squeak in alarm. "Syaoran? What are you doing here?"

The brown-haired boy enters the room, shutting the door on his way in. "Just curious to see what you do every morning."

"But how did you..."

"You mentioned the other day that you came here in the morning. Figured I'd poke my head in and see what it is you're working on."

"Ah. Well, I'm just..." I glance over at the painting. "Exploring surrealism."

Syaoran openly laughs. "I see that. What's it supposed to be, anyways? Fireworks?"

Nope. "If that's what it looks like to you, then sure. Fireworks it is. It's surrealism, so it can be anything you want it to be."

"So, if I look at it and see a post-apocalyptic alien species taking over Earth, that's what it is?"

I can't help but laugh. "If that's what you see. But, hey, it's supposed to look cheerful." I try to sound at least mildly offended.

He shrugs. "You're the artist."

"Ha! Yeah, I suppose I am."

He sits on one of the stools a few feet away to watch me. There's a lull in the conversation, but after a while, Syaoran finally admits, "Okay, I lied. I didn't come here just to watch you struggle with color schemes."

"Kind of figured. Alright, fess up. Why are you here?" I put down the paint and turn to face him.

"Well, for one, I was wondering whether or not you'd talked to Daidouji about what you told me the other day."

"Not, not yet. Why do you ask?"

"I'm curious to know how she takes it. Quite frankly, I'd also like to have a few words with her on the matter."

"Well someone's being rather cryptic. What, you can't talk to me about it?"

"It's not that kind of a conversation," he tells me with a half-smile.

"What's that supposed to mean? Isn't the conversation about me?"

"Yes, but that doesn't mean you need to be there." I narrow my eyes and he sighs. "Look, if Daidouji has a hard time handling the news, I think it would help for me to talk to her."

I raise an eyebrow. "You?" I challenge, doubting his abilities.

"Yes, me. Li Syaoran. The jackass who left his best friend when she needed him most. And, consequently, ended up ruining the friendship."

I flinch away from him a bit. "Well, geez. Don't hold back. You do realize that you were just criticizing _yourself_, right?"

"I'm well aware. We're both thinking it, though."

Picking up the paint once more, I return my attention to the canvas in front of me. "Maybe," I say, dragging out the vowels.

He lets out a dry laugh. "I'll admit, it's not my favorite topic."

"You brought it up. Actually, now that I think about it, you're _always_ the one bringing it up. Seriously, if you don't like talking about it, then why did you insist on having an in-depth conversation about my feelings on the matter? Especially when I made it so plainly clear that I did _not_ want to talk about it."

"You know the answer to that."

"Yeah, yeah. We 'needed' to talk about it. You said that."

"And was I not right?"

I shoot him a pointed look. "You know, it occurs to me that I never did get to yell at you."

He frowns. "Yell at me? Yes you did. Multiple times. In your house and during detention."

"Okay, first of all, you _broke_ into my house."

"You left the door open."

"Because you forced it open! You were pushing from the other side!"

He shrugs. "It was actually kind of fun."

"No, it really wasn't. It's the sort of thing I did when I was a kid."

"Nostalgia."

"More like crime."

"Oh, come on, you knew it was me. You wouldn't have tried to close the door in the first place if I hadn't been there."

"How does that help your argument?"

Silence.

"That's what I thought. And secondly, you were _trying_ to get under my skin that day in detention."

"I was trying to talk to you."

"Well, you got what you wanted, then."

"What you told me _wasn't_-"

"Syaoran," I snap. "Do you value that shirt?"

"Um..." He glances down at himself. "Well, it's my uniform, so I _guess_."

"Then I would advise you to stop talking."

He frowns. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It _means_ that I'm currently holding in my hands a brush and a pallet full of paint, and if you keep talking, your shirt will become my new canvas."

There's a low whistle. "You would seriously paint on my shirt? Isn't that kind of... Juvenile?"

"Whether or not it's 'juvenile' is irrelevant. And I'll have you know that this paint is _acrylic_."

He feigns a gasp and says in an annoyingly sarcastic voice, "Oh, no! Not the acrylic!"

"Haha, keep laughing-" he's not laughing- "but I'll have you know that this paint both dries fast and is nearly impossible to remove."

He raises an eyebrow. "_Is_ it?"

I roll my eyes and resume painting.

"You know a lot about paint, don't you?" He asks, suddenly serious.

The question throws me. Of course I know a lot about paint. I started taking art classes during junior high school and fell in love. I felt connected to it. The way I was able to pour out all of my emotions onto a piece of paper and turn it into a work of art made me feel like I was doing something meaningful.

"Of course. I come here all the time," I say with a nostalgic smile.

"That's not it."

My eyes dart over to him. He sits leaning over, eyes fixated on me.

"I don't doubt that you come here often, but there's more to it."

Surveying his demeanor, I ask, "What makes you so sure?"

"Your eyes. They light up whenever you talk about it." I feel my cheeks grow warm.

I don't know how to reply, so I try to redirect my attention to the painting in front of me.

After a minute of silence, Syaoran finally speaks. I can tell he's uncomfortable by the way he shifts on the stool and runs his fingers anxiously through his hair.

"Look, Sakura, about the other day..."

The other day? As in _the_ other day? What on Earth does he have to say a about it? And why is he shifting topics to this of all things? He's giving me no time to mentally prepare myself for this. I've been trying to forget it ever happened. It's way too embarrassing to talk about! Doesn't he see that?

He takes a deep breath, and hold mine. "I just wanted to apologize."

Wait... What?

I openly gawk at him. "Apologize?"

"Yes, apologize. I overstepped my boundaries. If I made you uncomfortable, then I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

He's totally lost me. "What won't happen again?" I thought we were talking about how I almost kissed him. Why would _he_ apologize for that? And how would what he did make me uncomfortable when I'm the one who was throwing myself at him?

For a moment, he doesn't say anything, but instead stares at me intensely. Finally, he sighs and looks away, saying, "Never mind. Don't worry about it. It won't happen again."

Hold up! I'm totally confused right now? Are we even talking about the same thing? "Um, alright?"

Syaoran simply nods, then scans the room. "Say, do you keep your old paintings in here, too?"

"Uh, yeah. Why do you ask?"

"Mind if I take a look?"

"W-what?" I stumble over the word.

Syaoran rises to his feet. "I'm curious to see what it is you work on most of the time." There's something almost mysterious in his eyes. "And that painting you were working on back when..."

Hesitating, I rise to my feet, setting down the equipment. "Yeah." I beckon him over to me as I approach my storage space. "For the most part I just keep them here," I say, gesturing to the space between the counter and wall with the windows. There are only five paintings there at the moment, all covered by a large cloth.

He looks down at me. "Do you mind?" He asks stepping up to the paintings.

"W-well... I suppose not," I mumble. Before he can do anything, I reach out and grab his arm. "But just... These are really personal, so just..." I struggle with what to say.

Syaoran turns around and faces me. "If you would rather I not look, it's fine." His voice is soothing.

I smile weakly, too relieved to protest. "Thank you, Syaoran."

He nods.

"When I'm ready, I'll show you."

"Alright." He looks past me for a brief second before locking eyes again. "Do you mind if I stay?"

Feeling relieved and carefree once more, I ask, "Are you going to be reading another textbook today?"

He chuckles. "Does it bother you?" He asks with raised brows.

I tug my lips down in disgust. "Little bit."

He gives me one of those 'did you seriously just do that?' faces. "Well, in that case, you'll have to think of something for us to talk about, because it's all I have to do."

I grumble and turn around again. "Wonderful. You know, I wasn't kidding when I said you should talk to Naoko. She can find a book for you faster than the librarians."

"I'll keep that in mind, but don't get your hopes up. I'm not a huge reader."

"Well, clearly it's about time you change that. I feel bad watching you torture yourself with that textbook."

Syaoran simply rolls his eyes and we both sit down in our former spots, still going back and forth about his pick of reading material.

* * *

**Tomoyo's POV**

Day: Saturday; Time: Six o'clock; Place: The Southeast Tomoeda Station.

That's what Eriol and I agreed on for when and where to meet up. It's also where I'm currently headed. There's still a few minutes before six. I wonder if Eriol is already here...

As the station comes into view, I get my answer. Standing there, typing something into his sleek navy blue phone, is Eriol Hiiragizawa.

My breath hitches.

He's dressed very casually, especially for someone who seems so elegant and regal most of the time. He has on a pair of denim jeans and a gray t-shirt. Something about it makes my heart flutter. Then I blink and everything around me changes.

In front of me, still wearing the same clothes, is an older version of Eriol. He's knelt down in front of a flower bed with a gardening shovel in his hand. My entire vision tunnels. It's not until I spot the hand on his shoulder that I realize someone has walked up behind him. Adult-Eriol raises his head and looks over his shoulder at the person. I follow his gaze and my heart stops.

Is that who I think it is?

Long, flowing violet locks fall over the woman's shoulders and back. Her bangs hang less than an inch from amethyst eyes.

She sets down the flowers she's holding and wraps her arms around the man's neck. He places the shovel down in the dirt and pulls off one of his gloves. Then he raises his hand to the woman's cheek and pulls her face closer to his.

All I can do is watch, wide-eyed. No way am I actually seeing this. I haven't even know Eriol for two weeks! Why am I fantasizing about something like this? Is it just because of what he's wearing? I think I need to go see a doctor, because my brain is turning into mush.

Right as their lips are about to meet, a voice calls out my name and pulls me from my daydream.

"Tomoyo-hime!" My face instantly turns red. Eriol flips his phone shut and slips it into his pocket, walking over to where I stand. "You're here!"

"Yeah. Sorry, were you waiting long? I didn't realize I was late." I glance over at the clock in front of the train station.

"You're right on time, I just got here a bit early. I will confess that I am a bit nervous. Besides, what kind of man would I be if I made such a beautiful maiden wait out in the cold?"

Beautiful maiden? Is he talking about me? I need to learn to control how much I blush around this man. It seems like every sentence out of his mouth has me turning into a human inferno.

"So, where are you taking me?" I ask sweetly.

He grins. "It's a surprise."

"Hm. Well, will we be taking the train, or walking?"

"It's nearby, so we can walk. Will that be alright?"

I nod. "Of course. Lead the way."

He smiles and we begin down the sidewalk. We make smalltalk on our way. I study the types of places we pass. There's a food market, toy store, pet shop and other normal looking places. I haven't noticed any crazy fancy looking restaurants yet. Although, Eriol is dressed casually, so it must be someplace that's fairly ordinary.

I snap out of my thoughts as Eriol comes to a stop and turns to me.

"We're here."

I lift my gaze to examine our location. In front of us, with a signboard out front reading 'Ramen Noodles' in large kanji, is a nice quaint, traditional building.

"A Ramen shop?" Awestruck, I turn to him, my eyes wide.

He explains, "Since I'm new, I went around asking if anyone knew of any good places to eat around town. One young man in particular spoke especially passionately about this particular shop."

"We're going to have ramen?"

"That's what I had in mind. Will this be alrigh?"

"Oh, I don't mind; I'm just a bit surprised."

"Well, it's only the first time I'm taking you out, so I didn't want to do anything too fancy."

"That's actually a bit of a relief," I assure him with a sigh. I was expecting him to take me to some high-end European restaurant. It's a bit of a relief that he took me somewhere so casual.

He chuckles. "In that case, I'm glad I took that young man's advice. I'll be sure to thank him when we next meet."

I smile. He's so thoughtful. Eriol really does talk as if he's much older than his actual age. For some reason, I like it, though.

Stepping forward, Eriol slides open the door of the traditional Japanese building. He turns and waits for me to enter before following.

The second I set foot in the shop, I'm greeted by the mouth-watering smell of cooked ramen. Glancing back at Eriol, I feel a warmth spread across my chest and smile.

At first I was nervous about today, but now I feel completely at home. Maybe it's the warmth of the shop, or possibly the smell of ramen, or it could simply be the presence of the man next to me. All I know is that I could get used to this warm fuzzy feeling lingering in my chest.

* * *

**And that's it for Tomoyo and Eriol's first date. I didn't and won't actually write out what happens unless it's Tomoyo telling Sakura about it. I hope I didn't let all you E+T fans down. *Hangs head* It's a struggle writing Eriol's dialogue, so sorry if it's a total fail. I'm trying.**

**Oh yeah, and I'm saving the painting thing for another chapter. That's going to be a whole other emotional roller coaster. Maybe next chapter. Maybe not for another three or so chapters. Depends. Gotta check my notes for the story, because the next major plot development won't come until the end of the season. Those of you who read closely will probably be able to guess why.**

**Anyways, I'm off.**


	21. The Mysterious Figure

**Goodness. I did ****_not_**** want to edit this chapter. Seriously, it was dreadful. Even after editing it, I don't think that the flow is that good. Oh well, though. This chapter is basically just meant to foreshadow events of the upcoming chapters.**

**Important: There won't be an update next weekend. I'm going to be going on vacation next weekend and have no idea if where I'm going will have wifi. Even if it does, I'm going to be trying to relax, so if I don't feel like writing, then I don't want to force it.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Two hours. That's how long I've been sitting in the backyard of the Daidouji residence listening to Tomoyo go on and on about her date with Eriol. She keeps on sighing and staring dreamily up at the sky.

I haven't even had a chance to talk to her about Touya's plan for after my graduation because she won't stop long enough for me to bring it up. Although, right now doesn't really seem like the best time. She's so happy and peppy. If I tell her now, I'll just ruin her day. The only problem with waiting is that Tomoyo has been outrageously busy lately. Aside from school and phone calls, this is the first time I've gotten to talk to her in the past few weeks.

"Oh, if only you could've been there to see it. He was so charming."

This has to be the hundredth time she's said that.

"And the way he looked in those blue-jeans," she says, dreamily holding a hand to her cheek and looking off into the distance.

Again, she's already said this. Apparently Eriol wore a very casual outfit to their date yesterday. It's kind of hard for me to paint a mental picture of it after hearing Eriol talk all poetically every day. I can picture him in a suit and tie easy enough, but jeans and a t-shirt is a bit more tricky. According to Tomoyo, the look really worked well on him.

"Um, that's all really interesting and all, but there's actually something I need to talk to you about, Tomoyo."

"Yeah, okay. Oh, but I almost forgot, my mom is taking me to one of her meetings at the company today. It's at five, I think." She turns her wrist and looks down at her watch. "Crap! It's already four! Sorry, Sakura, I gotta go!" She leaps to her feet.

"Now?" Geez, I listened to her for two hours, and now I'm not even going to get to talk to her about the matter at hand?

"Yeah. I'm so sorry. Can whatever it is wait?"

It can, but shouldn't. "I guess," I say slowly.

"Thanks, Sakura. You're the best." She leads me back into the house and we split ways at the staircase as she races up to her room, leaving me to see myself out. With a sigh, I make my way over to the front door.

So much for telling her today.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

"And so she spent the entire _two hours_ telling me about her date with Eriol."

"Wow, Eriol already asked her out? It was just a matter of time, but come on, he's only been here for two weeks!"

Sakura shoots me a dark look. "Not the point, Syaoran."

"Right, you were saying?"

She immediately returns to her initial rant. "So, like I said, the entire time I was there she just went on and on about how good he looked in jeans. Like, I don't need to know _every single_ minute detail about how _beautifully_ the shade of his jeans matched his hair," she says dramatically. "Seriously, I don't even think their date lasted as long as it took Tomoyo to describe it."

I give her a perplexed look. Sakura finally glances over at me and then does a double-take. "What?" She demands.

"Why does it feel I'm becoming the guy in a movie that the main character goes to so that she can complain about her female companions to?"

All I get is an eye roll. "I'm going to ignore that. If you were listening, you'd get that I'm telling you this because I still haven't been able to tell Tomoyo about the _thing_."

"The _thing_?"

"Yes, the _thing_. That's what I'm calling it now."

"Nice name," I say sarcastically. "Real creative."

She stops painting for a moment to glare at me. "You know, if you _are_ supposed to be that guy like you said you are, and I'm the main character, then you really need to work on that attitude."

"Why? I thought the guy was supposed to be charming."

Sakura scoffs. "Charming? Give me a break, you're a far cry from being _charming_."

"That's a matter of opinion."

Sakura shakes her head and goes back to her work. There's a long pause before she finally asks, "So, is this going to become a regular occurrence? The morning visits, that is."

Oh great. Here we go again.

"I mean, wasn't one of the whole motives behind getting me to pass midterms so that we wouldn't have to see each other every morning?"

"You know, I honestly can't tell whether you enjoy spending time with me or absolutely hate it. You've opened up to me, yet it bothers you that I come here in the morning to study."

"You come in here and just sit there reading from that stupid textbook the entire time. It's distracting!"

"Sitting and not saying anything is _distracting_?"

"Yes."

Wow. Why did I have to fall in love with someone who's logic is so complicated?

"Seriously, do you want me to leave you alone?"

She stops with the brush inches away from the paper, and looks over at me, deep in thought. "No," she begins slowly. "It's just a little... You know..."

"No, I don't know. I can honestly say that I have absolutely no idea."

She groans. "Never mind."

Sakura places the pallet down, stands up and stretches. "I need to go grab some paper towels from the bathroom. I'll be right back." That's all she says before walking out of the room.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

"Hm." I sigh as I close the front door behind me.

It's been a long day. At lunch when Tomoyo and Eriol mentioned that they went on a date, the girls all turned to me for answers since apparently I'm the number one person to go to when it comes to information on Tomoyo's personal life. Kind of disturbing.

Then, Tomoyo stopped by the cafe, but left early to hang out with Eriol. Go figure.

Finally, just to top it all off, Chiharu dragged me out of work early to go to karaoke with Rika and Naoko. Apparently Rika and Naoko joined forces to brighten up our days. They claimed that we work too hard and our lives are too 'stressful'. For a while they were planning to get Tomoyo, too, but after hearing about her outing with Eriol, they quickly gave up the idea. Unfortunately, it was deemed that one day in the all-too-near future that we would all set aside a day to get together and sing karaoke together. And by everyone, they mean _everyone_. The three guys included. However, I'm fairly certain that Syaoran won't be too thrilled at the idea.

I contemplate wether or not I'll be able to escape from them as I wander down the hall to the stairs. My leg raises, and then I freeze, my foot on the first step, about to head up.

Something's not right.

My eyes scan my surroundings. I haven't seen any signs that someone broke in, yet for a second I felt like I was being watched. I didn't even notice it at first, but now I have this strange feeling that there were eyes on me just a moment ago. Could it be that I simply imagine it?

Brow creased, I bring my foot back down and slowly return the way I came. Reaching the living room, I pause and lean into the room, keeping a firm grip on the doorframe. Everything is normal.

Letting out a relieved sigh, I shake my head and rub my arms to make the hairs on my arms lay flat again. Yeah, I must have just imagined it.

Much to my dismay, just as I'm starting to relax, I feel it again. This time it's the hairs on the back of my neck rise, and my entire body goes rigid.

Nope, defiantly didn't imagine that.

* * *

After last night, I _may_ be acting a _little_ paranoid. And by a little paranoid, I mean that when Syaoran opened the art room door a bit louder than usual, I _might_ have screamed a little. That earned me a look. Then when he slapped closed that stupid textbook of his, I jerked and almost left a long blue streak on the painting I was working on.

When Syaoran asked what was wrong, I shrugged him off, but from the way he's been eyeing me today, I can tell that he's not convinced. What am I supposed to tell him, though?

'Hey, Syaoran, I'm fairly certain that there was someone in my house watching me yesterday. Oh, but all of the doors and windows were still locked, and everything in the house was just the same as it was when I left in the morning.'

I'm fairly certain that would just make me sound schizophrenic.

So, in short, I'm just going to keep the events of last night to myself. Unless, of course, it becomes a regular occurrence. Then I'll start to worry about whether or not I should tell someone.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

"So, Eriol, I hear that you and Daidouji went on a date this weekend," Takashi says with a wide grin on his face. We're sitting up on the roof again, eating lunch. The girls are over by the door and us three guys are on the opposite side of the roof.

"_Everybody_ heard, Takashi. They let it slip the other day during lunch."

"Yes, I know, but I was in the restroom relieving myself when that happened. By the time I got back, I'd missed all of the details."

I roll my eyes. Of course Takashi wants to know the details. He has no sense of boundaries. That and all he ever seems to do is gossip. It's kind of creepy.

"Well," Eriol begins.

Oh great, he's actually going to tell him about it. I really don't want to hear this. Sakura already told me about how Daidouji was obsessing over Eriol's jeans, which was already way too much information. I do not want to be sitting here while Eriol gives Yamazaki the rundown of how their date went. At least I can count on Eriol not to drag it out for too long.

"I took her to a ramen shop and then we talked for a while. If I might be so bold, I'd say that it went rather well."

Wow, that was even shorter than I was expecting. A mere two sentences. Impressive.

Takashi frowns a little. "That's it? Did you at least kiss her goodnight?"

Like I said, Takashi doesn't know the meaning of boundaries.

"I'm quite fond of Tomoyo and would rather not do anything to make her feel pressured or uncomfortable."

"So that's a no."

I roll my eyes again. "Geez, Takashi, leave the poor man alone. Hiiragizawa doesn't have to tell us about how his date went. Besides, he's only known Daidouji for two weeks."

"Compared to you who's know Sakura for ten years, but still hasn't done anything? From what I can tell, it's best to nip it in the bud."

My eyes narrow. "My relationship with Sakura is totally irrelevant. Not to mention a terrible comparison considering seven of those years she wouldn't even speak to me." Well, she spoke to me, it's just that she always looked about ready to rip my throat out.

"Yeah, but you were in love with her the entire time."

I'm about to retaliate when I'm interrupted.

"Hey! You three, come over here!" From the other end of the roof, Chiharu waves her hand, motioning us over to her. "I've got news," she says excitedly.

We get up and relocate next to where the girls sit. I walk up behind Sakura and sit cross-legged next to her. She watches me, but when I glance over at her, she looks away.

"Have you guys heard? Apparently we're taking a school trip to some beach."

"What?" Practically every one looks surprised. This is news to me, as well.

"Yeah. The teachers have been talking about it. From what I hear, it's supposed to be sometime right after New Years."

"Huh? But it'll be winter then!"

Agreed. I hate winter.

"I know, it's insane. You would think they'd be concerned about our health."

"Wait," Sakura abruptly intervenes. "How do you know that we're actually going? Couldn't this just be some rumor?"

Chiharu hesitates, but Naoko quickly speaks up. "It's true. The student council has been helping out the teachers with working out all the details."

"Really?" Daidouji grins excitedly.

"Yeah. All of the seniors in the council have been going crazy."

"Just the third years?"

"You didn't hear? It's a trip for our class only. They say it's because of how well we did on our midterms."

"They're taking us to the beach because we did well on _midterms_?"

"I know. It's strange. Still pretty exciting, though." Naoko glances at the rooftop door and then leans in closer to the circle. "Just between us, I don't think it has anything to do with midterms." Chiharu and Rika ask her why, and she smiles slyly. "I think it's just because they like us."

There are a few snickers and agreements. I just lean back and think to myself. The beach, huh? Sounds interesting.

* * *

**Naoko's POV**

"That's it! I can't take it anymore, you're coming with me." I look up in time to see Sakura angrily grab hold of Li and pull him towards me. "Naoko, will you please help this annoying jerk find an actual book to read?"

Strange request, but I don't see why not. "Sure." This should be interesting. I stand up and follow Sakura as she heads to the library, pulling an irritated looking Li along with her.

As we walk, Sakura explains the situation. "I'm sorry about this, Naoko, but Syaoran has been reading from this stupid textbook for over a week now, and it's driving me insane. He needs an actual book."

"Don't I have a say in this?" Li demands.

"No," Sakura states bossily. "If I'm going to share the art room with you every morning, then you're at least going to get an actual book to read. Oh, and none of that nonfiction crap."

Li rolls his eyes. "This is ridiculous."

"You'll be thanking me later on," she states confidently and pulls open the library door.

Amused, I watch the two bicker back and forth as Sakura forces Li towards the bookshelves. I have to hold back a laugh. How am I only just now noticing this? These two are like an old married couple.

"Now, work your magic, Naoko," Sakura says grinning happily.

I can't help but smile back then turn my gaze to the man standing begrudgingly beside her. "Alright, Li-kun, is there anything you have in mind? A genre maybe?"

All I get in return is a shrug.

"In that case, give me a general idea of what you like. Fantasy or science fiction, for example."

Li cringes, then looks over at Sakura as if expecting her to know the answer. She just looks back up at him with narrowed eyes. "Well, what are you looking at me for? How the heck should I know?"

It's actually kind of funny how uncomfortable he looks. "I don't know. Both, I guess. I don't really have a favorite."

"Wow, you're really trying to make this difficult for me, aren't you? In that case, do you like romances?"

_Pft_! Li glares down at Sakura while she covers her mouth in an attempt to muffle her snickers. She catches my look and quickly explains, "Sorry, it's just that I can't picture _Syaoran_ reading something with romance."

"How come?" I ask curiously.

"Well," she glances up at the amber-eyed boy, "he's just not exactly the 'romantic' type."

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. I look between the two for a moment before finally asking, "Are you two secretly dating or something?"

"What?" They both shout. Way too loud for a library.

"No!" Sakura waves her hands out in front of her. "No, no, _no_! Absolutely _not_! Why would you even think that?"

So many reasons, and I've only just now noticed how these two act around each other. Either I'm losing my touch, or I've been way too wrapped up in watching Tomoyo and Eriol.

"You give off that vibe."

"Well, no, we aren't. Strictly friends. I've never even had a boyfriend."

Li looks rather pleased by the statement. However, when Sakura notices the satisfied look on his face, she quickly snaps. "Oh, don't look so smug. Have _you_ ever had a girlfriend?"

Well, this conversation has sure taken an interesting turn.

Li hesitates. "I've been on dates." Key word _dates_. Meaning he's been gone out with girls before, but never had a girlfriend. _I wonder why_.

Sakura looks hurt for a moment, but then quickly composes herself. "Not the same thing."

Li shrugs.

As I watch the two interact, a question forms within me. Unable to help myself, I say, "If you don't mind me asking, I'm a little confused as to what your relationship is. I thought that you two had been friends since elementary school."

Being new to the friend circle, I still don't know all of the details of their relationship. Before I met Li, Sakura would speak of him as her evil tutor who was out to get her. Then I found out that they'd know each other since elementary school. Needless to say, I'm still pretty confused about the dynamics of their relationship.

Sakura shifts her weight from foot to foot. Li looks equally as uncomfortable. "It's complicated," Sakura says slowly. "To summarize, I used to-" She hesitates, glancing over at Li before sighing and telling me, "I used to have feelings for him."

Oh my gosh! What? Okay, clearly I'm losing my touch. How have I not noticed this before? Looking at them now, I can see it clear as day. From the way that Li's face is filled with regret, I get the feeling that Sakura wan't the only one with feelings.

"But you know guys," Sakura quickly says in a lighter tone. "They're not exactly the brightest at times." She casts a glare in Li's direction. That just makes the regret even more noticeable. Well, to me, but not Sakura, apparently. He's even cringing a bit. "To put it mildly, he did something that led to me no longer speaking to him. After that, our friendship basically ended." Before I can ask, she adds, "Up until a few weeks ago, that is. But as for my feelings for him, they're totally gone."

And _clearly_ that's a lie. Li doesn't seem to know that, though. It's like she just stabbed a knife through him and then pulled it right back out. Sakura is obviously trying to get under his skin, but I don't think she quite realizes the effect it's having on the poor guy. Seriously, I feel bad for him.

"Anyways, I more or less been ignoring him for about seven years before that happened. There's a little more to it, but that basically sums up what you need to know."

"I'd really appreciate if you didn't tell people that story while I'm standing _right next to you_. Now you're just _trying_ to rub it in my face."

"Yes, that is exactly what I'm doing. How'd you know?" Has Sakura always been this sarcastic?

"Wait. Did you _know_ she had feelings for you?" I ask Li.

Sakura answers for him. "I told him a few weeks ago." She doesn't let anyone say anything as she turns to Li and says, "Now, would you do us a favor and just pick a genre already?"

Li's eyes run along the row of books. Took long enough, too. "Action and adventure... Maybe?"

Smiling, I walk over to the shelf that he and Sakura are standing in front of. "Well, that's a good enough place to start."

"Finally," Sakura mumbles, stepping around Li and looking over the books. "It's too bad they don't separate books by genre."

"Don't the computers have a catalog of all the books in the library?"

"Yeah, but the computers are a hassle to use," I tell him. "Plus, you don't know exactly what you're looking for."

Sakura grumbles and pulls a book from the shelf. "This is going to take longer than I expected, isn't it?" She flips the cover open and skims over the little blurb before shoving the book back onto the shelf.

"Should've just left me and my textbook alone," Li comments, pulling books a fraction of the way out, glancing at the cover, then sliding them back into place.

"I'm actually finding this entertaining."

Sakura leans forward, looking around Li and giving me an odd look. "Why?"

"You two are are fun to listen to." Sakura just makes a face, telling me she still doesn't get it. "The way that you two talk to each other is amusing. Even when you're bickering."

Sakura and Li exchange looks. "Is that supposed to be a good thing?" She asks him. He shrugs.

"It is," I assure her. "Even though it seems like it's all you two do."

Li's attention shifts from the books to Sakura. "Yeah, why is that?"

Looking annoyed, she shoves a book at him. "You tell me. And while you're at it, see if this sounds interesting."

Li looks down at the cover and cringes. "Did you even look at this?"

Looking over to see what the big deal is, I break out into laughter. Sakura immediately looks up and over to the book. Her gasp just makes me laugh even harder.

"Oh, you've gotta be kidding me!" She grabs the book out of his hands. "This is that book!"

"You've read it?" Li teases.

"No! When I first started coming here during lunch, I was looking for a book and accidentally picked it up. I specifically remember thinking it shouldn't' be in a high school library."

"I can see why."

"It was over there, though!" She points off to somewhere else in the library.

"Sure it was," Li says, taking the book back and placing it on the shelf for her.

"It was! Naoko, stop laughing!"

"I-I'm sorry, Sakura." I try to suppress my laughter. "I-it's just the-the look on your face!" I burst out laughing again.

Sakura groans and lets her head fall forward until the top hits one of the shelves. "Fine, I give up. You were right, Syaoran. I should have just left you to suffer with your textbook."

"I'm glad you see things from my point of view, but we're here now, so let's just get this over and done with." He turns to me. "Yanagisawa, do you have any suggestions? Something you've read in the past, maybe?"

"Hm." I tap my chin thoughtfully. "Well, there might be one... Wait here, I'll be right back!" I race off down the isle. This is way more fun than reading all throughout lunch.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Why does it seem like every day that I've come home this past week, I've been worn out? Book hunting for Syaoran turned out to be a lot more difficult than I thought it would be. And Naoko even asked if we were secretly dating! That was probably one of the most embarrassing things anyone has ever asked me. Mainly because Syaoran was standing right next to me at the time.

As I open the front door, I make sure to lock it behind me. I've been taking extra care when it comes to locking doors ever since I got home and felt like I was being watched. I pull of my shoes and head down the hall as quietly as I can manage. I only make it to the living room.

_Creak_! I nearly jump out of my skin at the sound of a door being open behind me. The petrified shriek dies in my throat the moment I turn around. My eyes land on the two doors behind me down the short hallway. One of them is slowly pulled open. Everything seems to slow except for my racing heart. My mind screams for me to run, but my legs stay rooted in place.

There really was someone watching me. I hadn't imagined it like I'd hoped I had.

Inch by inch, the door opens and I can begin to make out the person on the other side. Tall, slim and pale. Then, less than a second later, I see his face, and my heart nearly stops in disbelief.

Very timidly, I take a step forward. Is this real?

Brown hair with a hint of red and sad but _alert_ chocolate eyes framed by wire glasses. So familiar, yet, at the same time, so strangely foreign.

"Dad?"

* * *

**You all have no idea how much I just want to entitle this chapter foreshadowing. That's basically what almost all of it is. Because, yes, I am finally going to be doing something with Sakura's father. He's a huge part of the story. Very important in developing characters. He's got his own little miniature plot... Kinda. Plus, I need him if I'm ever going to do anything with Touya.**

**Alright, so as far as when the next update will be, I doubt it'll be on the ninth or tenth (of August) since I'll have just gotten back. It'll probably be closer to Wednesday, which is the thirteenth. I'll be sure to update my profile before I go and when I get back so that you guys have a general idea of when it'll be.**

**Sorry I had to leave you guys with a cliffhanger. It's not that bad, though, right? I don't really think it is, but what would I know? I'm the one writing it. Not exactly like I don't know what happens next.**

**Anyways, hope this chapter wan't too disappointing. I'll see you all in two weeks!**


	22. Family Dinner

**Wah! Oh my gosh, I hate this stupid story so much!**

**...Okay, that was a lie, but for real, I totally was- up until like 60 seconds ago, anyways- going to have this one big long chapter with an action-packed ending, but then I just _couldn't._ It felt _wrong_. You'll see with the way that I end this chapter and start the next. It'll make sense then. Not the point. Point is, I decided that the end of what will now be the next chapter was just way too intense for me to put in this one.**

**Anyways, enough of me toying with your guy's minds, I wanted to say hi! It's been two and a half weeks! I missed you all!**

**It's been so long that you'll probably start reading this chapter, stop, and then think to yourself, "What the heck is going on?" Because if you're anything like me when I'm waiting for an update that takes a while, you'll have gone and read 10+ other fanfictions, possibly all with the same characters, and you will have absolutely _no idea_ what was happening. I'm not even kidding; when I used to bookmark a million different stories on my phone, I would go back and check for updates and it'll have been like two months, and I'll just have no clue what's going on.**

**With that said, I think if you go back and read the last little snippet of last chapter- heck, just go back and read the last word- and you should be set. The one word. Sakura says, "Dad."**

**Did you just have an 'ah-ha' moment? Hopefully. If not, I don't know what to tell you.**

**Wow. I had so much stuff I wanted to say in the authors notes, but now that I've split this chapter up, I guess the rest can wait until the end. Oh, but I almost forgot! Since I did split this chapter into two, and the interesting part is in the second half, you might be kinda bored while reading this. And I totally just insulted my own writing. Nice, Cupcake. Real nice.**

**I must just sound insane right now. I'm sorry about that. It's been a long day. That and I'm still readjusting to being home again. Everything feels colder now. Kinda creepy, because I was only at the beach for a week... Although, it was considerably closer to the equator than where I am now.**

**Enough of me talking, enjoy the chapter... Even if it is fairly uneventful...**

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

Something is definitely off with Sakura this week. Ever since Monday, she's been distant. It's weird, obviously, but somehow it feels like she's been acting strange a lot lately. Just last week she was acting uncharacteristically jumpy, and now it looks like she's hiding something. She keeps on glancing over at me in the morning with this look like she wants to tell me something, but as soon as I meet her gaze, she looks away and stays silent.

On Wednesday, she finally says something out of the ordinary.

"Um, hey, Syaoran." I look up from the book she forced me to check out from the school library last week. With my attention draw, she continues. "I'm not going to be here in the morning tomorrow or Friday."

"Huh? How come? I thought painting was your favorite thing to do in the morning."

"It is, but there's," she hesitates, "something I need to take care of."

I'm about to ask her what, when she quickly says, "Anyways, I just figured you should know, since you come here every morning, too."

"Oh," I begin slowly. "Well then, I'll take that into account." Now what am I supposed to do in the morning? I've gotten so accustomed to coming to school early every day, that I don't think I'd be able to sleep in if I tried.

More importantly, though, there's defiantly something up with Sakura, and I intend to get to the bottom of it.

* * *

Figuring out what's up with Sakura has proven to be more challenging than I anticipated. She lied to me when I asked her if she'd finished of everything she needed to. She claimed that everything was taken care of, but from the look in her eyes, I could see that she wasn't telling me the truth- at least not all of it. Something is defiantly going on, but I can't tell what.

Maybe something to do with her brother. For all I know, something could have come up that she's just not ready to talk to me about. Although, after she told me about her father the other week, I don't see why she would feel the need to hide anything from me.

Due to my lack of progress, I've decided to talk to Daidouji to see if she knows anything. I don't particularly want to invade Sakura's privacy when she's clearly not ready to tell me about what's going on, but I'm starting to worry. She's starting to look more and more distressed with every passing day.

I manage to catch Sakura's amethyst-eyed friend before class on Friday. She's about to head into the classroom when I intercept her.

"Hey, Daidouji, do you have a minute? There's something I wanted to ask you. It's about Sakura."

Hearing Sakura's name, her eyes immediately fill with worry. "Sakura? Why, is something wrong?"

"Uh," I glance over my shoulder to make sure the girl in question doesn't spontaneously show up at the wrong time. "I'm not sure. She's been acting strange ever since the beginning of last week. I don't mean to sound too intrusive, it's just that I'm-"

"Worried about her," Daidouji finishes my sentence for me. "I know you are, Li. Unfortunately, I'm not sure what you're talking about." She reaches up to wring her hair between her fingers. "I haven't spoken to her much these past few weeks, now that I think about it. If she's acting strange, I haven't noticed, and she hasn't said anything about it to me. Whatever 'it' is."

"Oh," I mumble, disappointed. So, Daidouji doesn't know anything, either. Back to square one.

"I'm sorry, Li."

"It's alright. Thanks, Daidouji." I turn around to head into the classroom, but stop when Daidouji calls out to me.

"Wait!" Her eyes light up as if she's just remembered something. Flicking her own forehead, she says, "I can't believe I forgot!"

"Forgot what?"

"Sakura's mom; she died at the end of autumn, remember?"

Memories of Nadeshiko Kinomoto's funeral invade my memory. That had been at the start of winter, but her mom died before that. Closer to the end of Autumn, which means... "That's right. It happened sometime this month, right?"

"Yeah. December," she taps her chin thoughtfully, "something. I can't remember the exact date, but I'm pretty sure it's sometime around now."

I lean back against the wall and cross my arms. "So that would explain why she's been acting strange. She's probably been reminiscing." I shove away from the wall and turn to Daidouji. "Thanks, Daidouji. I'll try talking to her when I get a chance."

"Anytime. And, hey, Li?" Once again, I pause just as I'm about to head into the classroom and look back at her. "Thank you for looking out for her." A warm, appreciative smile crosses her face. The way she says it brings a smile to my face, too.

* * *

As I enter the art room on Monday of the following week, Sakura doesn't even turn around. Dropping my things down next to my usual stool, I walk up beside her and say, "Good morning, Sakura."

"Ah." She blinks and looks up at me as if only just noticing my presence. "Good morning."

"Everything alright? You seem kinda out of it."

"I-I do?"

Oh, wow, she's lying through her teeth.

"Yeah, you do. Look, Sakura, if something is bothering you, I can-"

"Nope!" She quickly cuts me off. "Thanks, Syaoran, really, but there's nothing for you to worry about." Much to my surprise, she looks me straight in the eyes and says, "Everything's alright."

I stare into her eyes, trying to figure out if she's lying to me or not when I finally give up and admit, "Okay, that's it. I didn't want to say anything, but you're freaking me out, Sakura. You've been acting _really_ strange lately. I know that it's the anniversary of your mom's death this week."

Her hand automatically freezes reaching for the paint. Very slowly, she draws it back towards her body. Not facing me, she stiffly says, "It's not exactly a secret. Do you have a point?"

"My _point_," I tell her, "is that I'm worried about you."

At this, she turns her head and our eyes lock. She studies me for a long moment then shakes her head, and simply states, "I'm fine, Syaoran." Looking away, she adds, "My mother's death isn't what's bothering me."

"But there _is_ something bothering you." It's not a question.

She abruptly sets the paints down and turns her entire body to face me. "Syaoran, I know that you're just trying to help me, but this really isn't the way to do it." Giving me a stern look, she waits for me to say something.

"Okay, then what is?"

She shakes her head. "For once, could you just _not_? I mean, do you not realize that you're prying?"

I let out a frustrated sigh. "Fine. I give up. Don't tell me."

Sakura stares at me for a moment and then finally say, "Alright, fine. I'll tell you."

Whoa, hold up. Is she serious?

"It's my dad."

She is! All of that, and now she's just going tell me? Talk about a one-eighty.

"The Friday before last, he came to me and told me he needed to talk to me. He said that he had a favor he wanted to ask of me. At first, I was reluctant, but then, after almost a week of seeing him walk around the house sober, I decided something must be up." She glances down at the floor before continuing slowly. "So, I told him I'd hear him out."

When she doesn't go on, I rapidly inquire, "And?"

Sakura looks up at me again and just stares into my eyes as if trying to decide whether or not to tell me. After a moment, she sighs reluctantly, but goes on nonetheless. "He asked me if he could come with Touya and I when we visit our mother's grave this year."

Not meaning to say it out loud, I choke out, "Seriously?" I clear my throat and lean back on the stool, trying keep a straight face and process the information all at once. After a minute of very intense thinking, I finally lean forward in my seat. "So what did you say?"

"What _could_ I say? I told him that it probably won't be possible. Touya doesn't know about _any_ of this. My dad has been out of his study a lot more lately, but Touya hasn't been around to see it. He's too busy with work, I guess. Point is, there's no way Touya will ever agree to let our father come with us. After seven years of it being just the two of us, Touya probably doesn't even consider him part of our family anymore."

I let out a low whistle and stare at her.

"Yeah, I know," she agrees, as if reading my mind. "I'll figure something out, but right now I have no clue what to do. Part of me wants to tell Touya, but, at the same time, I don't know how without having him blow up."

Shifting my eyes to the side, I mumble, "I know exactly what you mean." Seriously, her brother has anger management issues. That and he hates me. If looks could kill, I would have died at the day I met Touya Kinomoto, the insanely over-protective brother.

From in front of the painting easel, Sakura smiles sadly. "I'm sorry, Syaoran."

Surprised, I blink a few times. "What for?"

"Bothering you with my problems. I'll figure something out, so don't worry about it."

With that, Sakura returns to her painting, and I'm left unable to do say anything to comfort her. Even though she doesn't realize it, when she says things like that it really bothers me. Honestly, it gets to me sometimes. Seeing her in so much pain, but not being able to do anything about it. It makes me feel absolutely helpless.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

"Why you stupid little... Ugh! I will annihilate you! You think you've got the best of me, well, you've got another thing coming! When I'm done with you, you're gonna be-"

"Um." My head shoots up to find Chiharu standing across the counter, staring at me as if I've gone insane. "Everything alright in here, Sakura?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't it be?"

"Well," she begins, looking down at my hands. "You were kind of just screaming at the dishes."

"Oh." I set down the plate in my hands. "Right, that. It's nothing. Just a stain that doesn't seem to want to come out."

She raises an eyebrow, but keeps quite. Then, the door behind her opens and in walks our manager.

"Sakura, why don't you head home early today? Things have ben pretty slow around here today, and I know that this week has been extra stressful for you."

I hesitate, looking down at the unfinished dishes. "Are you sure? It's really not that big of a deal."

"Yes, you should go. Ruby is closing tonight, and you know how she can be when someone gets in her way while she's locking up." I cringe. Mrs. Matsumoto turns her attention to Chiharu. "Actually, you should probably head out, too, Chiharu. No sense staying."

Unlike me, Chiharu immediately perks up. "Really? Awesome. Come on, Sakura, we can walk back together." She turns to me with bright, excited eyes.

"But the dishes." I look over at the remaining pile of silverware.

"I'll take care of it," Mrs. Matsumoto says. "You two go home and get some rest."

I hesitate one final time before reluctantly taking off the plastic gloves and following Chiharu into the changing room.

"Thanks, Mrs. Matsumoto!" Chiharu calls back, skipping happily out of the kitchen.

Mrs. Matsumoto smiles pleasantly. "Good night, ladies."

"Good night," we call back in unison.

* * *

As I arrive home, I'm greeted by my father.

"Sakura," he says, looking up from his paper in alarm. "You're back early."

"Yeah." I toss my bag down on one of the chairs and head into the kitchen. "Mrs. Matsumoto let me leave early."

My father opens his mouth to ask something, but then stops and shuts it again. He rubs his face as if deep in thought. Finally, he opens his mouth and begins slowly, "Mrs. Matsumoto..."

"Oh! Sorry, she's my boss. Manager of Twin Bells- the café I work at."

"I see." He looks down at the table as if ashamed of himself.

For a moment I'm confused by his actions, but then it hits me like a ton of bricks. He's never heard about who my manager is or where I work. Even though I've worked there for six years now, he didn't know because he never cared to ask or listen.

Unsure what to do, I quickly change the subject. "So- um- I was going to make dinner now. Does just some spaghetti sound good?"

As if coming out of a daze, the man before me looks up and simply stares at me for a moment before finally blinking a few times and saying, "Yes, that would be wonderful." With a desperate look, he stands up. "Would you like some help?"

"Um..." I glance over my shoulder at the rest of the kitchen. Then it hits me. Turning back to him, I smile and say, "Sure, I would really appreciate that."

And just like that, we get started, moving around the kitchen and exchanging helpful comments in regards to the preparation of the meal.

Fifteen minutes later, my father is walking between the kitchen and dining room to set the table. As he pulls the plates from the cabinet, he pauses and glances over to me.

"Do you think your brother will be eating with us?"

I freeze in the middle of straining the noodles. Crap. When does Touya get back today, anyways?

"Um..." My eyes dart over to the clock. Thank goodness. I'm fairly certain he doesn't get off for another hour today. That should be plenty of time to finish eating and clean up dad's plate. If he were to walk in and find dad eating dinner at the table with me, he'd freak. "He doesn't get off for a while," I say as regretfully as I can.

"Oh, I just thought that maybe he'd like to join us."

"Yeah, about that," I begin slowly. "I haven't exactly told him about how I've been talking to you."

"You haven't? Why is that?"

"Well... It's just that Touya isn't exactly as _understanding_ as most people when it comes to... certain things." There. I think I worded that alright.

"Ah." He nods. I let out a relieved sigh.

He gets it.

"So my son doesn't approve of me."

Crap. How do I respond to this? I can't exactly deny it. That would just be my lying straight to his face. But I also can't just agree and tell him that his own son thinks he's useless as a father.

"I guess it's a bit much for me to have asked you to let me join you in visiting-" He stops short, the words getting caught in his throat. There's a wince on his face and a depressed look in his eyes.

Reaching out, I rest my hand over my fathers and give him as comforting of a smile as I can manage. "I'm sorry," I whisper. He simply nods.

There's a moment of silence before I pull my hand back and say as upbeat as I can manage, "Well, let's start eating before the food gets cold."

He nods once more, then we finish up in the kitchen and take our seats at the table.

We eat our dinner in comfortable silence, and for the next half hour, I reminisce over all the times the four of us would sit down and eat dinner when I was younger. Touya and I rarely get to actually sit down and have meals together, and even when we do, there's always something missing. Even now, there's still something missing. Maybe if Touya were here as well, it would feel whole again. At least, I'd like to think that; but, in the end, the only real thing that's missing is something that can never be replaced.

Even if my mother were to suddenly show up on our doorstep, smiling and telling us everything we ever thought was true was actually a lie, it still wouldn't be the same.

Not even if dad got help and went back to work and Touya and I could finally live our lives the way that we should.

I'll never be able to go back and have a normal childhood. That was torn away from me. I was forced to grow up and face the reality that was set in front of me. Nothing can ever change that. Nor can anything change that Touya had to drop out of school. He had to give up graduating alongside all of his friends and classmates- people who he'd known all his life. All of his dreams for the future were crushed.

We will never be able to go back and redo our lives. There's no turning back the clock. Time will continue to march on, same as it always has. Ruthless and unforgiving.

That part of our lives will forever remain tethered by the harsh reality that we were faced with. There's no putting aside what our family went through. All the things we lost. A loved one, precious to everyone she know. But so much more. We didn't just lose a mother and wife when Nadeshiko left us. We lost meaning of the word 'family'. Touya and I clung to one another because we didn't want to let it go. Our father, however, wasn't as strong. He lost sight of what was important. As much as I love him, I can't deny that my faith in him is nearly nonexistence. There's an absence of trust. In Touya's case, all that's left is bitterness. It makes me wonder how much longer I would've lasted before I, too, became consumed by bitterness.

Maybe five years. At that point I'll have graduated and started living my own life.

Possibly ten years. I could decide to save up and try to go to college in my late twenties or early thirties.

For all I know, it could even have been fifty years. It's ideally the time I would retire, but without a college degree, there's a possibility that my salary won't be enough for me to ever retire. What would've happened then?

Had I not started speaking to my father again, any of them would still be valid possibilities. Now, however, I'm not sure if I'll ever truly be able to see things the same way. All those things I once thought about my father aren't holding up anymore. My outlook is slowly starting to change, because for once, I can finally see the man behind the mask of alcohol. The man he was before Nadeshiko died. The one who cared about his children. The one who would look at me, smile, and tell me that he loved me.

It almost seems to good to be true. But right now, with him sitting across the table form me eating a meal that _we_ cooked _together_, I'm not about to question that. Just for a little while, I'm going to live in this moment. The here and now, and not let anything that may happen in the future effect my enjoyment of just having my father back.

* * *

**See? Uneventful. Kinda sad when you think about it. I just couldn't _not_ (double negative) use this as an ending. It's like my signature closing. Dramatic speak from the person who's point of view it is... Which is always Sakura, because Syaoran's life is... Not as dramatic. Oh, but next chapter ends with a dramatic exit from someone besides Sakura! No, it's not Syaoran. Sorry to disappoint, but it's actually a pretty exciting chapter in my opinion. Me being the author who is totally not objective. ****You guys should really just let me know when I post it.**

**Speaking of which! The next part of this chapter is already up to 2k words (or so says my calculator/phone) making it at least 1k short. I'll have it up sometime Saturday probably. All I really need to do is add a beginning for the chapter and then it should be good.**

**Okay, it's getting later and later, and I've already made you guys wait forever for this, so I'm going to stop writing author's notes, and just post this. Sorry if it wasn't as awesome as you were hoping. Next chapter won't be nearly as slow. Hope you keep reading till then.**


	23. The Fight

**Last Update: May 20, 2015**

**I've removed most original authors notes from this chapter. I'm just updating now because I was reading over and realized I didn't record when I switched from Syaoran to Sakura in the original. Hope this clarifies things.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Everything is going fine. At school, everything is normal. At work, things couldn't be going better. At home, my dad is finally starting to show interest in his family and Touya is still blissfully unaware of it.

Still, for some reason I just have this feeling that it's too good to be true. It's as if I'm just waiting for something to go wrong. As much as I want to tell myself that everything will be alright, I can't shake the feeling that there's something just waiting to go wrong.

Heaving a sigh, I push myself up and turn my back to the blank paper that's been weighing down on me.

"Everything alright?"

The voice slows my steps as I approach the window. Sighing again, I lean my head against the glass and fold my arms over my body. "Yeah."

There's a moment of silence followed by the sound of a book being closed. "You sure? Two days ago you were worrying over how your brother was going to react to the news that your dad has been talking to you."

Lifting my head, I stare out the window and down at the tiny figures moving slowly towards the school building.

"It's not that."

Behind me, I can hear the sound of the only other person in the room standing up and footsteps as he approaches. A few feet away, close to my left, the sound stops and in the reflection of the glass, I can make out the person's face as he watches me.

"Did something happen?"

I can't help but smile at his words. His voice dripping with concern, and his eyebrows scrunched together.

"Didn't I tell you already?" Turning to face him, I step closer and pull his hands into my own, giving them a reassuring squeeze. "Try not to worry so much, Syaoran. I'm going to be fine."

He squeezes back and says firmly, "I'll hold you to that."

* * *

All of Wednesday and Thursday, I've been trying to do my best at paying attention to everything that's going on around me, but there are times that I just slip up.

During class, I was looking out the window and didn't even notice that the teacher was calling on me until Syaoran lightly poked me between the shoulder blades a few times with his pencil. Confused, I turned around, ready to glare daggers at him, only to have him gesture forward. By the time I realized Mr. Terada was calling my name, he was already standing next to my desk, towering over me.

Then, on the way to lunch, I wasn't really paying very much attention when I walked smack dab into Tomoyo and sent both of tumbling. I ended up apologizing probably a million times for that. Still am, actually. After all, I landed on top of her and practically crushed her.

Not only that, I also mixed red and green paint when I was getting ready this morning. I ended up just adding some yellow to the mix and then putting more green off to the side and making a tree. It was ridiculous. I felt like a kindergardener. Plus, just to top it all off, Syaoran saw it and made this face. Not just any face, it was as if I could feel him judging me. Oh, and he also looked like he wanted to laugh at my unoriginality. He ended up regretting it, thought. I gave him my best Touya-death-glare impression, which immediately made him redirect his attention to his book.

Currently, it's Thursday afternoon and I'm waiting for Chiharu to hurry up and finish changing so that we can head out. Ruby was more than happy to lock up the café for the rest of the week, so Mrs. Matsumoto has been letting Chiharu and I leave earliest since we're the youngest employees.

Walking up to the changing room door, I bang impatiently. "Chiharu, are you almost done in there? It's been over ten minutes!"

"Don't rush me," Chiharu yells from the other side.

"Why? Is it because you have to get ready for your date with Yamazaki?" I taunt.

"It's not a date!" she booms, throwing the door open and marching out, forcing me to quickly step back. "It's a casual outing between two mutual friends."

"Right." I point a finger down at what she's wearing. "That's why you've got on a dress."

She swats my finger away. "It's a casual dress."

"Maybe for late spring, early fall, but winter is almost here. The temperature has dropped close to ten degrees in the past week alone."

"You're exaggerating. Besides, you know me. I'm always warm!"

Disgustingly so. While the rest of us are freezing our butts off, Chiharu is always just sitting around taking in the breeze and saying how nice it feels. As much as it pains me to admit, I'm extremely jealous of her because of it. The only thing that makes me feel better is looking at Syaoran, who hates winter in Japan because he says it's way colder here than in Hong Kong.

"Stop rubbing it in my face."

She grins slyly.

"No matter what you say, I know the real reason. You just want to impress Yamazaki."

That wipes the smirk right off her face. Blushing like mad, she starts to object, but I quickly continue.

"Although, I don't know why, since it's obvious that you two have been in love with each other since- well- forever."

Now I'm the one grinning.

"Takes one to know one."

"Excuse me?"

Once again grinning, she states, "You and Li are always making goggly eyes at each other when the other isn't looking."

Damn her. "No we don't."

"Yes you do."

Grumbling, I mumble, "Okay, fine. Maybe _I_ do, but Syaoran doesn't, so it's not the same."

Chiharu rolls her eyes and slings her purse over her shoulder with a sigh of forfeit. "I give up. I can't win an argument like this with someone as dense as you."

"Part of me feels like I should be offended by that, but I won, so I'll let it go." Smiling at my win, I spin on my heel and pleasantly skip out of the café.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

"Where is she?" I squint, trying to see off into the distance through the window. For crying out loud, there's fifteen minutes before class starts. She's never this late. More and more people are starting to show up from all directions.

Suddenly, there's an object that flicks into my line of sight. My eyes follow it as the figure weaves around the other students and towards the school courtyard. It's been so long since I last saw Sakura use her rollerblades that I almost don't think it's her.

Feeling more excited than I would like, I push away from the window and head out of the room.

I'm walking briskly down the hall, almost to the front of the building, when someone comes racing around the corner.

"Ah!" The person, who- of course- turns out to be Sakura, yelps as she runs right into me and stumbles back.

"Whoa there, slow down."

"Syaoran!" Her head shoots up. "Sorry about that," she says sheepishly.

"No big deal. Why are you in such a hurry?"

"Trying to get to the art room, of course. I got sidetracked this morning talking to my dad, and didn't even realize how late it was until I glanced at the clock."

"Oh, how are things going on that front?"

We turn and head down the hall towards the art room.

"Good. I still haven't told Touya, but I plan to tonight. He gets off work early, and I figured I'd take the opportunity to corner him. Not gonna lie, though, I'm kind of a nervous wreck right now."

"So I've noticed. To be fair, though, you have been a 'nervous wreck' all week."

"Normally, I'd be yell at you for that, but since I already ran into you, I'll let it slide."

"Ran into me? More like tried to bulldoze me."

"Don't push it."

* * *

"_Why_ are you still following me?"

"Moral support?"

"Not good enough."

"Because I'm bored?"

"So you decided to follow _me_? Why not Yamazaki? Or better yet, why not Eriol? The two of you seem to be best buds."

"Um, first of all, Eriol and I are not 'best buds' and second Takashi has some sort of 'outing' with Mihara tonight."

"What? Are you serious? So that's why Chiharu took off work today? They _just_ had one of those yesterday."

"I know, he canceled our game night for it."

"Game night? Are you for real? You have game nights on school nights?"

"Wei doesn't have a problem with it."

"Wei is _way_ too nice to you."

I can't help but smirk.

"What's with the face?"

"Nothing. That sentence just sounded weird."

"They're homophones. When did you start finding things so funny, anyways?"

"Are you saying I'm not a funny person?"

"I'm saying that you aren't the type of person who finds others funny, not that you yourself aren't funny." She pauses. "Although, I suppose you yourself aren't a particularly 'funny' person."

"I resent that statement. I can be funny when I want to."

"Sure you can," she agrees sarcastically.

We stop in front of Twin Bells and Sakura turns to face me.

"Anyways, I have to go, so as much as I would like to stand here and talk to you about your sense of humor, I can't."

"Disappointing, but I guess I'll live."

"Right. Well then, I'll see you on Monday."

"Oh, that reminds me! You're mom's anniversary, it's on Sunday, right?"

"Yeah. Still have to talk to Touya about that."

"I'm sure you'll be able to."

"Maybe so, but what I'm really worried about is how he's going to react."

"What's the worst he could do?"

"You'd be surprised. I've really gotta go now." She turns, but then stops a few steps away. "Oh, and you better not still be here when I get out."

I raise my hands to my sides. "I actually have to make dinner tonight, so that won't be a problem."

"Good." She nods her approval. "I'll see you Monday, then."

"Monday it is. Be careful on your way home."

She rolls her eyes. "Always am."

"Just making sure."

"Goodbye, Syaoran."

Chuckling, I just give her a small wave and turn around when she's out of sight.

That girl sure is something else.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Friday night, I'm laying in bed, staring at the ceiling and debating how to tell Touya about our dad when, out of nowhere, there's a loud knock on my door. I push myself up into a sitting position and call, "Come in."

The knob twists and the door moves inward to reveal the dark haired man on the other side.

"What's up, Touya?"

My brother glances around my room looking slightly nervous, with his hands behind his back, holding something. He steps cautiously into the room, immediately alerting me that something is up. Touya is _never_ this polite. The knocking, the cautious steps. Definitely something fishy here.

"Nothing much," he says, sounding casual. A little _too_ casual.

"Yeah, that's why you're holding you're holding something behind your back right now." He scowls. "You can't lie to me, Touya. Spill."

His hard look fades into one of affection and amusement. "Yeah, I guess you're right about that, squirt." He pulls one of his hands out from behind his back to ruffle my hair.

"Hey! Knock it off!" I swat his hand away.

Chuckling, he brings his other arm from behind his back, takes a few steps away from me and holds out perhaps the most adorable dress I've ever seen- excluding Tomoyo's creations, of course.

"Wow," I whisper, rising to my feet. "It's beautiful." I allow my fingers to run over the scarlet fabric. After a moment of taking it in, I pull my hand back and look up at my brother. "Where did you get this? It almost looks familiar somehow."

He lays the dress on his arms to look it over. "It used to be mom's."

My eyes widen. "What?"

"Yeah, it was down in the basement. I've been waiting until you're old enough to give it to you, and I think you're big enough now that it should fit you."

"Fit me?" My eyes flick from the beautiful dress to the man holding it. "You want me to wear it?"

"That is what I had in mind. I thought you might want to wear it on Sunday when we go to see mom."

I gasp, covering my mouth with my hands. "N-no, Touya, I can't."

"Sakura..."

"It's mom's; I wouldn't feel right wearing it."

Touya lays a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Sakura, mom would have wanted you to have it. Just imagine how happy it would've made her to see you wearing it. She _loved_ this dress."

My eyes wander down to the dress once more. He's right. Mom used to give me some of her old things, and it always made her happy to see me with them. Remembering her smile, I reach out and gently take the dress, transferring it from Touya's arms into mine.

Lifting my gaze to my tall brother, I give him a genuine smile and promise, "I'll treasure it."

Touya smiles back down at me and says, "I know you will."

For a moment we stand in silence, then I turn to put down the dress and Touya begins to take his leave. "Um, Touya, wait!" He stops in the doorway and looks over his shoulder, awaiting my words.

Now or never, Sakura.

"There's something I need to talk to you about."

Raising his eyebrows slightly, he turns around. "What is it?"

"It's... It's about dad."

The tranquil look on Touya's face instantly dissipates, replaced by one of irritation. "What about him? Don't tell me he did something stupid, or I'll-"

"No!" I quickly interject. "It's nothing like that, it's just..." My gaze wanders to my feet. I knew that this was going to be hard, but I never knew _how_ hard. I force myself to look up at my brother again. "Please don't freak out, but I think he's changed."

Touya's jaw almost drops from the disbelief. It's as if he finds the mere thought to somehow be absolutely and ridiculously unfathomable. "What do you mean, he's _changed_?" Touya demands.

"What I mean is, he hasn't been drinking as much recently. I don't even think he's drinking at _all_, to be honest."

"That's not possible." He immediately shrugs the idea off, dismissing it.

I shake my head. "Touya-"

"No, listen to me, Sakura, people like him don't just suddenly _stop_ drinking. It's been seven years. If he were going to stop, then he would've done it a long time ago."

"But I'm telling you, Touya, he's changed. I've been talking to him, and-"

"You've been _what_?" His face begins to turn a brilliant shade of red.

"Just hear me out, okay?" From the way he's fuming, I highly doubt that'll be possible. "It's been two weeks now, and he's-"

"_Two weeks_?" Touya's voice booms, making me both jump _and_ cringe. "This has been going on for _two weeks_ and you never _said_ anything?"

"I'm sorry, Touya. Please, just listen to me. He wants to go visit mom with us." My words only seem to add fuel to the fire.

"He _what_?" His voice is dangerously low.

"I'm begging you, _calm down_." I put emphasis on the last two words.

"I will not calm down, Sakura. If he thinks he can just up and waltz right back into our lives, he's got another thing coming!"

"Stop shouting! He wanted me to talk to you about it. The reason I was so afraid to tell you was because I didn't want you to do something that you'd end up regretting later," I cry in defense.

"Damn right I'm going to do something, but don't count on me regretting it later." Before I can stop him, Touya has already turned and stormed from the room.

"Wait! Touya, don't!" I race out after him, nearly tripping on my way down the stairs. "Please, just hear me out!"

"Damn it, where is that bastard?" Touya throws open a random door and then turns, barreling down the hall towards the study. "Fujitaka!" He slams the door open and it hits the wall with a loud bang, leaving a dent in the drywall.

I race into the study in time to see Touya reach across the desk, grab hold of our father's shirt collar and force him to his feet. Touya glowers down at our father as he reaches up and grabs Touya's hands, trying to free himself.

"Touya," he starts to say.

"Shut up!" Touya snaps. "What do you think you're doing, talking to her? If you've got something to say, you can say it to me, otherwise keep it to yourself. Don't you even _think_ about trying to take advantage of Sakura just because she's willing to listen to your sorry ass."

"Touya, stop!" I grab hold of his arm, but he shrugs me off.

"That's not my intention. Please, listen to me, son."

Looking disgusted, Touya forcefully throws him back as if trying be rid of him. He stumbles back, tumbles over the chair and falls to the ground. His head meets the wall with a painful _thunk_.

"Dad!" I race around the desk and fall to my knees next to him, reaching out but hesitating to inches away from his head, afraid to touch it and potentially hurt my father. Much to my relief, he slowly begins to pull himself upright.

"Don't call me 'son' as if we're family."

Furious, I whip my head over to my brother. "What do you think you're doing?" I scream.

"What am _I_ doing? Open your eyes, Sakura! He doesn't really care about us!"

I can feel the tears running down my face, as I cry back in a hoarse voice, "You're wrong!"

"Am I? If he loved us even a little, he would've been there for us when we needed him. But was he? No. He let us fend for ourselves while he went out and drank his problems away."

"Stop it," I beg, my head down.

"No! I've had enough of this." Next thing I know, there's a painful tug on my arm, and I'm being pulled to my feet. "We're leaving, Sakura."

I'm unable to do anything as Touya roughly forces me along behind him out of the study and away from our father. I can hear him calling out after us to wait as we go.

"Let go of me, Touya! He's hurt!" I thrash violently against my brother's grasp, but, in the end, my attempts are futile.

"He's lasted this long. One little bump on the head won't kill him. If we're lucky maybe it'll teach him not to try doing anything like this again."

Terrified by his dark words, I find myself too in shock to do anything but follow his order when he tells me to put my shoes on and allow him to pull me out the front door. Even as the cold autumn night breeze hits my face, I'm too numb to move. But then I look up and catch a glimpse of the man pulling me along behind him. Every singe fiber of my being refuses to identify the man in front of me as my brother. That murderous glint in his eye. It's not from the same man who raised me. It's from someone cruel and savage.

Someone who's not Touya Kinomoto.

Someone who's not my brother.

* * *

**Touya's POV**

"Enough!" Sakura's voice trembles as she twists her arm free of my grasp. "What do you think you're doing?"

"I'm getting you away from that monster. I'm _protecting_ you."

"I don't need your protection! I'm not a child anymore!"

"Oh, is that so?"

"Yes! So stop treating me like one!"

"I only treat you like on because you can't take care of yourself! The only reason I've allowed you to stay here this long is because I knew you wanted to be here. If not for that, I would've taken you far away, long ago."

Tears cascade down the brunette's face, her emerald eyes bloodshot and glistening as the last rays of sunlight wane over the horizon. She glares at me with such disgust that I begin to feel sick. But I shove away the pain for the sake of getting her as far away from here as possible.

"We're leaving." I state, taking her hand again, but she pulls away.

"No." Her voice is stern and unyielding.

A frustrated sigh escapes my lips. "Do not test my patience, Sakura."

"I'm not leaving him here alone! What if something were to happen to him?"

I scowl. "Then good riddance."

Sakura looks at me as though I've stabbed her through the heart.

Disappointment.

Hatred.

But most of all, betrayal.

She pulls her lips back from her teeth, sneering at me. In the most venomous voice I've ever heard from her innocent mouth, she hisses, "I don't even know you anymore."

Before I have time to think twice, the words are tumbling from my mouth. The only thing on my mind is the emotions swirling in her once untainted emerald eyes. "I could say the same to you."

The next thing I know, she's gone. Shoving past me and running down the street. I can feel my heart breaking. Everything around me blurs. None of it matters. She's all I have. What have I done?

Pulling away from my thoughts, I turn and stumble down the front porch after her. My feet carry me to the end of the road before my knees finally buckling beneath me.

"Sakura!"

My sister. My family. My everything.

She's gone. I've scared away the one person I live to protect. The reason I stay on this Earth. I'm alone. There's nothing left for me now. I'm all alone in this cruel, messed up world. My only salvation.

_Gone_.

And I keep asking myself, over and over again, one question. The same exact question a million times, and never being able to come up with an answer.

What have I done?

* * *

**Very dramatic chapter. So is the next.**

**Note: The dress from this chapter that is Sakura's mother's is actually in the canon. Episode 16 of the anime to be exact. Sakura's great grandfather gives it to her. The difference is that the dress I'm using is meant to have been Nadeshiko's when she was older.**

**Also, this was the chapter that I hit 100k words, so let's all do a little mini cheer. We've made it this far. Thanks for reading, and please continue. And, of course, if you have time, then I'd love it if you dropped a review.**


	24. Meltdown

**Also, sorry it's like... The middle of the night right now. I ended up changing some things in the chapter last minute. Poor planning on my part...**

**Anyways, it's chapter 24. Shit's going down right now, you guys.**

**Haha, though! This chapter is pretty long. Also, lots of SxS. And I have a comment on that which will have to wait till the end. By the way, I did a really lame job with editing this time(even lamer than the usual), so try not to freak out too much when there are errors. My grammar skills aren't the best as it is.**

**For now: ENJOY!**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I'm running. Feet pounding against the asphalt. Heart racing within my chest. Lungs gasping for air.

Running. Running.

Take me away.

_I could say the same to you_. My brother's words echo through my mind.

Take me far away.

* * *

I don't know how long I've been running when, both mentally and physically exhausted, I pull myself under the King Penguin and collapse onto the mulch. As I gasp for breath, strange and foreign sounds escape my lungs. The air around me seems to thin, as if all the oxygen is being sucked from the Earth's atmosphere.

Everything is going to be fine. I can get through this. Just keep breathing.

Pushing my back against the inside wall of the structure, I draw my knees up against my body and wrap my arms tightly around them, clutching them as closely to myself as possible.

I gasp for air, trying to slow my racing heart. Deep breaths. In. Out. In. Out.

After a few minutes, my heartbeat slows. Still breathing heavily, I crawl out from under the giant slide. Rising to my feet, it's as if the weight of the world has dropped down onto my shoulders.

_What now?_ I wonder, looking around. The sun has already set, leaving only the erie glow of the lampposts to light up the sidewalk as I exit the park and make my way down the path.

I don't have anywhere to go.

Under normal circumstances, I would go to Tomoyo. Now, however, it's late at night and if I went over, I would have to face her mother. I don't think I could handle the things she would ask. The judgment. The pity. I don't want it. Any extended family would just be too hard to face right now.

With everything that's going on with Chiharu's family, I can't go there. She's supposed to be out on with Yamazaki, anyways.

I have no clue where Rika or Naoko's houses are, so they're out of the question.

Touya will probably either go to Yukito's house to spend the night, or it will be the first place he looks for me.

There's only one option.

Next thing I know, I'm standing in front of an indigo apartment door that I seem to be finding myself at more and more lately. I ring the bell.

There's a moment of silence and I begin to panic.

Could he be asleep? The sun has already gone down, so maybe he went to bed early. My heart pounds wildly out of control.

Before I get the chance to ring again, the door before me swings open to reveal a very confused amber-eyed boy. Upon seeing me, his eyes widen. Neither of us was expecting this. After all, it was just a few hours ago that we were parting ways saying that we would see each other again after the weekend was over. Yet, here I am.

"Sakura! What are you doing here? And–oh my–what happened to you?" I can tell he's too stunned to move.

Feeling exposed, I instinctively wrap my arms protectively around myself.

"U-um," I try to keep my voice low and steady, but it still comes out shaky and strained. "I-I'm-" What do I say now? "I'm sorry. I-I didn't know where to go-" I can't look him in the eyes. My gaze casts downward to the ground.

In front of me, I can tell Syaoran is panicked and confused. Alarmed, he manages a step forward, saying, "Ah–sorry; I didn't mean to upset you. Here," he moves aside to let me through, "come in."

I draw my arms closer to my body, stepping forward. "Thank you."

I enter slowly, and Syaoran quietly closes the door. I allow myself to fall to the floor just inside the door and try to pull off my shoes. Much to my dismay, they don't budge. It's as if all the energy has been drained from my body. Everything feels heavy and constricted.

"Damn it," I whisper helplessly. My fingers tremble, trying to undo the laces.

In front of me, Syaoran bends down and catches my hand. Looking up, I find him giving me a reassuring look. He doesn't say anything as he reaches down and carefully begins to untie the knot for me. With the knot is undone, he takes my ankle and gently lifts it up, removing the shoe from my foot. It slides off into his hand with ease far more ease than when I tired. He does the same for the other.

Once he's finished, he just sits there and waits for me. As I look up, he asks, "You good?"

I nod, not really sure if it's true or not. He rises to his feet and offers me his hand.

I take it, and this time the weight on my shoulders doesn't feel quite as heavy.

* * *

Everything is a blur. I'm numbly aware of Syaoran asking me if I've eaten, and me telling him that I'm not hungry. I just watch him from my place on the couch while he rushes around from room to room, pausing a few times to try asking me things, and then getting up and rushing off again. The entire time, he has this worried look on his face.

Eventually, I lay down on my side and do my best to curl up. Everything feels cold. My mind keeps on telling me that it isn't; after all, there's no way Syaoran would keep the apartment any cooler than his idea of 'chilly', which is about twenty degrees warmer than most people's idea of the word. Still, there are bumps rising on my arms and they're not from when I was outside a few minutes ago.

When Syaoran re-enters the room and kneels down beside me, he seems to bring a wave of warmth with him.

"Sakura."

I lift my gaze from seam along the edge of the cushion to Syaoran's brilliant amber eyes, flecked with a deep shade of red.

"So tired," I whisper, my eyes drifting shut. Those two words alone are enough to leave me breathless. It's as if the second I passed through the doorway into the apartment, all of my energy depleted.

Syaoran frowns and looks down at my body, which is struggling to stay all the way on the couch with the position I'm in. He looks into my eyes again. My eyelids feel ridiculously heavy. It's a struggle just to keep them open.

"I'm going to move you into my room so that you have more space, okay?"

I simply let out a small hum. Next thing I know, I'm being lifted off the couch. The sudden feeling of being suspend in mid-air brings my eyes open again. Clutching Syaoran's shoulder, I look around and realize that he picked me up.

As I raise my gaze to his face, I find him already looking down at me. "Sorry. Did I startle you?"

All at once I wrap my arms around his neck and bury my face into his shoulder while shaking my head.

He remains silent. The only sound made is the sound of his feet carrying us out of the room and down a hallway.

I inhale deeply, allowing his scent to envelop me and bring warmth to my body. I can't remember a time when I last felt as relaxed as I am right now. It's strange considering everything that just happened, but I wouldn't mind staying like this.

This must be Utopia.

Then, before I know it, I'm being lowered onto something soft very comfortable. Not as comfortable as Syaoran, though, so as his arms around me disappear and he starts to pull away, I tighten my grip around his neck.

"Don't go."

His shoulders hunch a bit as he sighs. "Sakura, I need you to let go of me."

I shake my head, burying it into his shoulder. "Just until I fall asleep."

"Sakura..."

"Just until I fall asleep. Then you can go."

He heaves a sigh of defeat. Reluctantly, he lays down on his side, facing me. I pull my arms down from around his neck and clutch onto his t-shirt. He strokes my hair gently, but I can still feel how tense he is. I wish he weren't. His embrace always relaxes me, but he's completely rigid. My chest constricts at the thought of how uncomfortable I'm making him. Guilt tugs at me, but in the end it's nothing compared to the joy and utter pleasure of knowing that I'm falling asleep in his arms. The back of my mind taunts me for being so selfish.

Eyelids begin to feel heavier.

Fingers begin to lose their grip.

Syaoran's scent plus the pounding against my ear on the other side of his ribcage makes my mind gradually turn completely blank.

My last thought before drifting to sleep is: should his heart be beating that fast?

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

"Get-" _Slice_. "Out of-" _Slice_ "My-" _Slice_. "Head!" I swing the sword a little too harshly, leaving a gaping hole in the armchair. I curse under my breath, knowing that Wei will probably kill me later, and then I lay the sword down on the coffee table.

Clearly, I shouldn't be doing this right now. Not when my hormones are practically _screaming_ at me, and the girl I'm in love with is sleeping less than fifty feet away. In my room. On my bed.

"Damn it, stop thinking about it!" I raise both hands to my head and grip my hair, trying to force the thoughts from my mind. Stepping back, I allow myself to fall onto the couch.

Ever since last night, my face has felt like it's on fire. My heart has been pounding, too. I hardly got any sleep last night. I'd blame the couch, but I know that's not the issue.

First, Sakura shows up out of the blue, crying and saying she doesn't have anywhere else to go. Then, she lays down on my couch and almost gives me a panic attack with that vacant look in her eyes. Soon after, she wraps her arms around my neck while I'm holding her–plus, she buries her face in my shoulder. Finally–as if that's not all enough–she makes me lay in bed–_my_ bed–with her until she falls asleep. And she wasn't allowing me any breathing space whatsoever!

I'm trying to be considerate. Really, I am. Clearly something happened–most likely with her brother and father–that she's worked up about. Right now, she needs someone to lean on. A friend. One that I'm not so sure I can be if she keeps on clinging to me and _making lay in the same bed as her_. No, I do not plan on getting over that anytime soon. She is _way_ too trusting. That, or she just gives me way too much credit. Frankly, I don't _want_ that much credit.

All of this, and at the same time, I feel like a total prick because I'm mad at her. It's not like she was trying to. I highly doubt she even realized the effect she was having. She's so dense, that she probably has no idea what she was doing was like torture for me. Given, it also felt like what I would imagine holding an angel would feel like.

Leaning back, I let my head rest against the back of the sofa while I stare up at the ceiling.

I need to go take a nice, cold shower. Now.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

So much color. So much life. Normally it would make me happy, but right now it's just taunting me. After my break down last night, all I feel right now is rage. Anger towards people and things that have nothing to do with my frustration. I know that it's not Touya's fault, but that just makes me even more mad.

I can't take it anymore. This stupid painting that symbolizes my momentarily beautiful and peaceful life. I'll never have that, so neither should this painting.

I'm not even aware of what I'm doing as my fingers wrap around the tub of vibrant red acrylic paint. Blinded by my anger, I tip the container over and let the red liquid pour out into my cupped hand. Even as it spills over my hand and onto the floor, I don't take notice. I just observe the way it looks as it streams from my hand down into a puddle on the floor that grows bigger and bigger, until I finally carelessly toss the jug onto the counter once more.

I lavish in the feeling of the cold paint against my skin as I rub my palms and fingers together, allowing even more of the paint to waterfall from my fingers onto the floor.

Fireworks, huh? Then let's go _boom_. With the image of my brother dragging me away from my life planted in my mind, I reach forward and slap my palm against the painting.

"'A new _life_,' you say." I drag my fingers against the paper until they reach the edge and then graze the wet paint with my fingernails. Four marks disrupt the otherwise perfect smear. _Good_, I think to myself. Nothing deserves to be perfect.

"You've never once listened to what _I_ want!" Touya's face seems to come forth from the canvas and taunt me even further. Furious, I smear the paint from my other hand onto the picture.

Just as I'm about to go in for another blow, strong hands wrap around my wrists and force them still. A tall, sturdy figure blocks the painting from view.

"Stop!"

"Get out of my way!" I scream as I thrash violently against the person in front of me.

"No!" The person's grip tightens. "Calm down!"

"Let go of me!" I try stepping back, only to be forced in place by the person before me. Then, in my rage, my body moves of its own accord.

I manage to twist my wrist and pull my arm out of my assailant's reach. "Get off of me!" With a final cry, swing my hand back... And then forward again.

_Slap!_

The offensive sound echos through the room as my hand successfully lands its blow.

Before I even have time to register my own actions, the man in front of me catches my wrist once more and pulls me closer. "Stop." And I do.

Anger gives way to fear from the sound of the man's voice, booming with authority. Absolutely terrifying. My knees wobble and a whimper passes my lips. Wet liquid streaks down my face, and I know that I'm crying. They aren't because of my fear, though. There's no way in the world that the person holding me would ever try to harm me.

They're tears of frustration. Desperation. And more than anything, shame for what I've just done.

"Fireworks," I choke out. Beautiful and liberating. "You called them fireworks."

Finally, my knees give out and strong arms pull me against a sturdy body. I clutch desperately to the man's arms and I sob violently against him.

I know who it is. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I was perfectly aware of who the person standing in front of me was since the moment his hands wrapped around my wrists.

Very slowly, he lowers us to the ground then pulls me close and brushes his fingers through my hair, trying to calm me down.

"It's going to be alright, Sakura," he whispers into my ear. "You're going to be alright."

My fingers dig into his t-shirt. I imagine that it must be painful, but I can't let go or loosen my grip.

"I-I can't take this anymore." Everything seems to fall apart. "Please, just make it stop," I beg, heaving in air as sobs wrack my entire body. "It hurts so much. Make it end."

"I'm right here, Sakura." He shushes me quietly and rocks us back and forth for a while. "Everything is going to be alright."

I just stay clutching onto him as if he's my lifeline, until my throat dries and my muscles ache.

He's here, holding onto me. And, right now, that's all I need. Just to have him here, watching over me and making sure that everything is alright.

* * *

"How did you know I was here?" I ask as I slowly pick up the paper towels from the counter. It's a weekend, so–technically–no students should be here. Still, it's not impossible to get into the school when the gate is shut. Sure, we aren't supposed to, but it can still be done.

"Wei told me that you looked pretty out of it when you left, so I threw on some clothes then had him drive me here." As I kneel down on the floor and begin wiping up the paint, Syaoran walks towards me and also kneels down. "Here, let me." He takes the paper towel roll from my hand and tears a sheet off.

I open my mouth to protest, but Syaoran quickly silences me by placing his hand over mine, looking me in the eyes and saying ever-so gently, "You're still trembling."

My eyes break away from his to look at my hand in his. Sure enough, it's moving against his, and I realize that my entire body is shaking. Flabbergasted, I stutter, "I don't know why. I feel fine." I look up at him once more. "Really, I don't know why, because I'm fine now."

Syaoran shakes his head, looking concerned. "You might _feel_ okay, but you need to take it easy; alright?"

He stares at me with such intensity and concern, that I have no choice but to simply nod in silent agreement.

Syaoran, looking relieved, holds my gaze for a few more seconds before looking down at my hand again and flipping it over, taking me by the wrist.

"What are you..." I trail off as he lifts the paper towel up and begins to wipe off the excess paint still on my hand. He doesn't look up at me, but I stare at his face the entire time. To be exact, my eyes remain fixated on the red handprint that's glistening with partially dried paint.

As he lets go of my hand, it falls limply onto my lap.

After wiping my other hand off, he finally seems to notice my stare.

Somewhat alarmed, he asks, "What's wrong?"

I raise my hand to his face, but stop just as my fingers are about to touch his skin. Guiltily, I draw back. My actions bring a frown to Syaoran's face. He lifts his hand to his cheek and lightly touch it. Looking down at his own hand, he finally seems to realize what I'm staring at.

"Oh." He catches my gaze. "I'm fine. It doesn't hurt or anything like that."

I look down. Of course it doesn't still hurt. Not physically, anyways. Still, I'm more mortified that I did it in the first place. At the time, I was so exasperated that I struck him. A moment was all it took. A moment in which I lost all control over my own body. It's so unlike me. Up until a few minutes ago, I never would have thought myself capable of raising my hand to someone–especially someone I hold so dear–yet, here I am. Sitting across from the person I love, staring at the evidence on his face, red-handed in more ways than one.

"Syaoran." I finally allowing my fingers to graze over his cheek. Turning my face away, I bite my quivering bottom lip. "I'm so sorry," I whisper.

Warmth shoots up my arm as Syaoran's hand wraps around mine. "I know you are, Sakura," he says, his voice equally low. "You didn't mean to; I know that, and I forgive you."

I face him again, this time meeting his eyes briefly. "You shouldn't be so forgiving." My lids drift shut and I lean forward until my forehead meets his shoulder. In the process, I bring his hand down to my lap.

"Now where have I heard that before?" he muses.

I can't help but smile, then, turning serious again, I pull back and say, "Thank you, Syaoran."

"Hm? What for?"

"Everything. Yesterday, and again today. You keep on helping me, and I really... I'm thankful for that." His eyes soften. "Also, I'm sorry. Not just for hitting you, but for constantly turning to you whenever I need something."

"You don't need to-"

I quickly cut him off, holding up my free hand. "No, please, let me finish."

Respecting my request, Syaoran closes his mouth and his eyes tell me to go on.

Taking a deep breath, I continue. "For the longest time, I was nothing but a total bitch whenever I saw you. Even after that, you still wanted to be my friend. That alone baffles me, but you've been so thoughtful... I just want you to know that it means a lot to me."

Syaoran smiles, opening his mouth to say something.

"Oh, and one more thing. About last night..." The smile immediately dissipates and I almost think he turns slightly pink. "I know that I made you uncomfortable, and that wasn't my intention at all. You were trying to help, and I totally crossed my boundaries. I'm sorry I made you so uncomfortable. I assure you that it won't-"

"Wait." This time, he's the one holding up his hand, waving me off. "Back up for a minute." I find myself leaning back, even though he doesn't mean it literally. "What makes you think I wasn't okay with it?"

Huh? "Because, you were all tense."

"Tense?"

"Yeah, your muscles were tense."

Syaoran just stares at me with a dumbfounded look on his face for a moment. It confuses me a bit as well, since he acts like this is all news to him. Shaking his head, he asks, "So, you thought I wasn't okay with it?"

"Why do you act so surprised."

Groaning, he slaps himself in the face with his palm, letting his hand slowly slide down his face. "Why do I even bother?"

"Huh?" I tilt my head to the side, confused, but Syaoran just shakes his head.

"Never-mind."

I shrug. He sure can be weird sometimes.

* * *

"You know, you never did tell me what happened yesterday."

I look up at Syaoran, who stands on the opposite me in front of the outdoor sink. We decided that we should probably clean up, and since I declared the girls bathroom off-limits to him, and there wasn't a chance in hell I was going into the guy's bathroom, it was decided that we would just use the outdoor sinks to clean ourselves. Syaoran pointed out that we could always just wait for each other to finish, but I told him that I didn't want to.

"I didn't?" I ask, trying to remember everything that's happened since last night up until just now when we were in the classroom.

"Nope. You showed up at my doorstep, then you crashed at my place, and, finally, you came here and relieved your pent up anger, but nowhere in the mix did you actually explain the situation."

"Oh." I frown, realizing he's got a point. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Doesn't make much sense now that I think about it. You must think I've lost my mind."

"No–not yet, anyways."

"Ah. Well, to put it simply, Touya went kinda berserk when I told him about how I've been talking to my dad and that he wants to go with us so see mom tomorrow. Kinda had a slight argument after that."

"_Slight argument_? You wound up spending the night at my apartment because of a _slight argument_?"

"Okay, it might have been slightly less slight, and slightly more major."

"Are you trying to confuse your way out of this?"

"Ugh, fine. We had a huge fight and I ran off. Happy?"

He runs a hand through his extra-messy locks and says, "No. How bad was it? I mean, clearly if you ran off it was pretty bad, but you're going to have to go back eventually."

"I know. It was bad. He said some things that just... He really scared me. It was like it wasn't even him anymore." I lean forward against the sink. "I don't think I've ever seen him like that before. Not to that extreme, anyways."

Syaoran studies me for a moment. "There's something else, isn't there?" I look down.

For all I know my dad could be laying unconscious in his study with an injured head right now. Who knows? I never went back in to check on him. Even after I said I wasn't going to leave him, I turn and ran off.

"Don't worry about it." I force a weak smile. "It's nothing."

"Don't do that, Sakura," Syaoran says softly.

The smile falters. "Do what?"

He meets my gaze. "Force yourself to smile. You don't have to pretend around me, Sakura. It's alright if it hurts. Don't feel like you have to hold it in. There's nothing wrong with letting it out."

Just like that, the smile drops from my face. "I'm sick of crying, Syaoran. I've spent far too long feeling sorry for myself. All I ever seem to do is complain about how horrible my life is." I push away from the sink, suddenly feeling much stronger than I did before. "I'm done felling sorry for myself. And I'm done sitting around and letting other people run my life. I think it's about time I take matters into my own hands. I'm sorry, Syaoran, but I have to go!"

With that, I turn and start to run back inside.

"Wait, Sakura! Where are you going?" Syaoran calls after me.

"There are a few things I need to take care of! I'll call you when I have everything sorted out!"

Not wasting any time waiting for his reply, I turn and race into the building, down the hall, and then out once more on the opposite side. Adrenaline pumps though my veins.

I need to speak to all of my family and sort this out once and for all.

* * *

I pause in front of my house, but only allow myself a brief second before shoving open the front gate and marching confidently up the front steps. Strangely, the when I try the front door, I find it unlocked. As if whatever is waiting for me on the other side is expecting me.

Very cautiously, I pull off my shoes and step into the house, silently closing the door behind me. There's not a single sound except for the sound of the floorboards creaking beneath my feet. Entering the family room, I see why.

My father lays, sprawled out on the couch with an empty bottle of liquor in his hand, secured between him and a cushion.

"Dad." I walk up next to the couch and reach down, gently slipping the bottle out of his hand and placing it on the table. "You were doing so well."

Lifting the blanket from the back of the couch, I lay it over him and head into the kitchen where I fill up a glass of water and pull the first-aid kit from under the sink.

As I kneel down next to my father again, he begins to frown. "Dad?" He pinches his eyes shut. "Wake up." This time, his eyelids slowly lift all the way.

"Sakura?"

"Hey, dad."

Groaning, he pushes himself upright, only to stop and clutch his head and moan.

"Here," I hand him the glass of water, "drink this. And, here, take these, too." He holds out his hand and I drop the pain-killers into his hand.

"Thank you." He gingerly places the Aspirin into his mouth and gulps it down with the water.

"Feel better?"

He nods.

"Do you mind if I look at the back of your head?"

As if having forgotten his injury, Fujitaka reaches back and touches his head. Wincing, he immediately pulls away.

"Do you remember what happened last night?"

Looking down, he nods. "Yes, but what are you doing here? Where is your brother?"

"I came back to make sure you were alright. I'm sorry I left last night without making sure you were okay. I don't know where Touya is, either. We had a bit of a disagreement last night and I ran off. My best guess would be that if he's not here, he's at Yukito."

My father shakes his head and his eyes lock on the empty bottle of alcohol sitting on the coffee table. Hanging his head in shame, he says, "I'm sorry, Sakura. I was trying to be better, I really was, but after you and your brother left, I just..."

"I know, dad. I know you're trying."

For a while, we simply sit there in silence. A certain understanding passes between us.

"You don't have to go through it alone. Touya may not understand, but I'm going to be here to help you through this. If you're willing to put in the effort to stop, I'll stand by you."

He sits there, wide-eyed in total astonishment. It's as if he's trying to gauge how serious I am. "Why? After everything I've put you and your brother through, why do you still care?"

I smile earnestly. "Because, no matter what, I'll never forget what you were like before mom died. I hope that one day you can be as happy as you were back then."

Tears brim my father eyes and before I know it, I'm being pulled into a tight embrace. At first I'm to shocked to move. Then, I lift my arms and return my father's embrace, allowing my eyes to drift shut.

"Thank you, Sakura."

* * *

"You're going out?"

"Yeah." I sigh. "Figure I should probably go have a word with that brother of mine."

"So you're going out to look for him?"

"Pretty much. Like I said, he's probably over with Yukito at his place."

"Does he still live with his grandparents?"

"No, he got an internship and is going to college now. He lives in the next town over."

"How will you get there? Do you want me to call you a cab?"

"No, I'm good. I can take the train."

"Alright, just be careful. Don't stay out too long, either. If the sun is going down and you're still there, just call me. I can come walk you back."

"I'll be fine, dad. Look, if it starts to get too late and I don't feel comfortable walking home on my own, I'll just call a friend of mine. He's got a car."

"He? You have a male friend who can drive a car?" Concern is written all over his face. If Touya were here, all hell would break loose.

"No, my friend can't drive, he's the same age as me. His butler-slash-legal guardian can drive, though."

"Hm." My father nods. "Butler, you say? This friend of yours must be very wealthy."

I frown. "You could say that." More like he's the heir to one of the most successful business corporations in all of Hong Kong- maybe even all of China.

"This friend of yours," my father begins skeptically, "he wouldn't by any chance happen to go by the name 'Li Syaoran' would he?"

"You caught me," I confess.

"I thought you and that boy had a falling out many years ago."

"We did," I agree. "It was just over seven years ago, just before mom passed away."

My father silently nods. "So you two made amends?"

"In a manner of speaking. We agreed to move on from the past and try being friends again."

"Just friends?" It's clear what he's implying.

"Yes. Just friends. Nothing more, nothing less."

"Ah, I see. I simply thought that- since you used to have feelings for the boy- maybe it had developed into something more."

"No." I try not to show how disappointed I truly am. "Syaoran and I are just friends. He doesn't see me like that, anyways."

There's a glint in my fathers eye. "Oh, I wouldn't be so certain about that."

I raise an eyebrow quizzically.

"It's nothing." He shrugs it off. Quick to change the subject, he turns to the clock and says, "You should probably head out, then. Even if you do have an alternative way home, I'd feel more comfortable knowing you weren't out too late."

I giggle. "Alright, dad. I'll try not to be too long."

* * *

**MUAHAHAHAHAHA. Yeah, so I did it. You all know what I'm talking about... Hopefully. The part where she spends the night at Syaoran's apartment.**

**I will have you all know that I really hesitated putting that part in. I mean, it's totally cliché... But then I realized something... IT'S THE SIGNATURE FANFIC MOVE! I can't even begin to count the number of times I have seen that one used in a fanfiction (I read _a lot_ of them when I get in the right mood).**

**Anyways, I was basically like, "Okay, screw reason, I'm doin' it." And so, as you can see, I've done it. And hopefully didn't just totally make you all hate me for it... Although, why would you?**

**Point is: don't hate me for being unoriginal. It's still adorable, right? (...Please just agree with me here)**

**Ha. It's almost midnight. Sorry to those of you who read the authors notes. Actually, I've got an important announcement to make next chapter, so if your reading them now, be sure to read them next time.**

**Goodnight, and I hope to see you all again next time. *Salutes***


	25. Nadeshiko's Grave

**Wow. I'll admit: I'm impressed. That actually was a fairly painless editing process... Probably because the chapter is only like 3.2k. Sorry about that. It's short and there's only one small SxS moment. You may all proceed to cry in the comments below. It was a SxS overload last chapter, and this chapter, there's next to none. Talk about contrast. *Insert long pause* Maybe I should work on that.**

**Wanna know a fun fact? Apparently nadeshiko flowers grow in the fall... Unless Harvest Moon has been lying to me, but I'm pretty sure it's not. Hopefully.**

**So... This chapter is kinda both depressing yet uplifting at the same time. At least, I tried to make it uplifting at times. Anyways, you've been warned.**

**Last thing before the chapter, I promise. I made 100 reviews, so I just wanted to thank you guys and give everyone a big virtual hug. I'm passing out virtual cupcakes, too. It's a party. (Seriously, you guys are awesome)**

**Now, enjoy.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

When I knock on the door to Yukito's apartment, he's the one who answers.

"Sakura!" His eyes widen and he glances over his shoulder, trying not to seem too alarmed.

I smile weakly. "No need to act so surprised, Yukito. I know he's here."

The silver-haired man sighs in defeat. "You caught me. What tipped you off?"

"It's kind of obvious. Touya isn't exactly Mr. Popularity."

He laughs at this. "No, I suppose he's not." Stepping aside, he gestures for me to enter. "If you please."

"Thank you." I enter and carefully remove my shoes. "Where is he?"

"In the back moping. He's been sulking ever since he got here last night. It's actually a rather depressing sight."

"Did he tell you what happened?"

"Not exactly. I got the gist of it, though."

"Hm." I pause in the main room and turn to the man behind me. "So, I take it you know about what's going on with our father?"

"Only from what Touya has told me. He said something about you talking to Fujitaka and that he was taking advantage of your forgiving nature."

"Figures. He wouldn't even listen to me when I tried to explain the situation to him. Truth is, my dad wants to go with us tomorrow when we visit mom, but Touya doesn't want him to. Touya also probably failed to mention that our dad has been trying to stop drinking."

From the surprised look on his face, I can tell that he didn't know.

"After last night, he fell back on old habits, but he's really trying. I know it must be hard on him, so I intend to support him through it. That's part of why I came here. To tell Touya that."

Yukito nods. "Just, please go easy on him, Sakura. He's been beating himself up over whatever he said to you. Everything he does, he does because he loves you."

I smile weakly. "I know, Yukito." And then I turn and head to the room where my brother is. It's time for me to stand up and face this like an adult. Touya needs to understand that wether he likes it or not, I'm going to be making decisions for myself from now on.

* * *

**Touya's POV**

I'm sitting in the guest bedroom of Yuki's apartment when the door suddenly bursts open and my sister comes marching in with a determined look on her face.

"Alright, here's how this is going to work, Touya," she declares, not giving me any time to speak. "You're going to sit there and listen to what I have to say with an open mind. You aren't going to interrupt me, and you aren't going to ignore me, either. Do I make myself clear?"

Wow. Is this really my little sister? When did she become so take-charge and commanding?

Without waiting for so much as a nod, she continues. "Good, now listen up. You may not _like_ that I've been talking to dad, but you're just going to have to deal with it, because I don't intend to stop anytime soon."

I open my mouth to protest, but she doesn't let me.

"As for tomorrow, I am going with dad. If you can't man up enough to join us, then you'll have to visit mom separately. I highly doubt she would want that, but if you can't be mature enough to visit your own mother with the man she raised us with, then that's your problem and yours alone."

There's a long silence. "Are you done?" I dare to ask.

"One last thing." Sakura looks at me more intensely now. "I am not going to leave that house. Not now, and not after graduation, either. Dad wants to change, and I'm going to support him the entire way though till the end." She stops briefly. "Alright. _Now_ I'm done."

"May I speak?"

"Only if you can handle my response." It's taking all my willpower not to tell her off right now. If I do that now, it'll just make things worse. They're already bad enough as it is.

"What do you intend to do if he can't change?"

"He will."

"You can't know that."

Her eyes narrow. "I believe in him, even if you don't. He _will_ change, and it'll be for the better."

For a long moment, I simply study her expression. Then, after determining that she truly believes her own words, I nod. "Alright, fine."

She blinks, surprised. "What, that's it? You're just going to agree; no argument?"

I nod. "Yep. If you think he can change, then I'm not going to bother trying to change your mind." A smile immediately spreads across her face. "But-" the smile vanishes- "don't misunderstand me; I'm not convinced. If you want to believe in him, then alright. I can't stop you. Just know that when he falls back on old habits, don't expect my sympathy."

"Fine by me. He won't, though. I'm going to be sure of that." She shifts her weight from one foot to the other. "And, Touya?"

"What else?"

She takes a deep breath, looks me in the eye, and says, "I'm sorry for what I said yesterday. You're my brother, and even though I love you, sometimes you just," she pauses shaking her head at the thought, "_really_ do things to set me off."

"What can I say? It's in the job description."

She smiles. "I love you, Touya."

All of a sudden, it's as if the argument never even happened. She's my sister, and I'm her brother. We share that unique sibling bond. It's something that I take for granted, but value, nonetheless.

I open my arms, and Sakura is across the room in a flash, crashing against me. "I love you, too, Sakura."

* * *

Fujitaka greets us as we walk through the door. At first he's surprised to see me, but then his eyes soften. A silent agreement passes between us in that moment. Turning to my sister, he asks quietly, "Sakura, will you excuse your brother and I for a moment? I'd like to speak with him."

Looking both confused and a little worried, she glances between us.

"Don't worry, I'll keep my temper in check this time," I promise.

At first she hesitates, but finally nods reluctantly and leaves to go upstairs. Once she's completely out of sight, I turn to our father. "So, Sakura says you two have been talking."

"Yes," he nods.

"How long?" I ask, entering the living room and sitting down in the armchair.

"About two weeks or so."

I nod. "She mentioned that you want to go with us tomorrow. Is that why you've been talking to her?"

"Partially, but not entirely." Well, at least he isn't lying.

"What's the other reason?"

Fujitaka lowers himself onto the couch, leaving plenty of room between us. "I wanted to talk to my daughter. Is that so wrong?"

I scoff, and he frowns, leaning forward. "Touya, do you remember what you said to me that day you brought me home from the station?"

I raise an eyebrow. "Yeah, I remember. I told you were a failure as a father." Fujitaka visibly flinches. "Still mean it. Why?"

"That opened my eyes. After you said that, I started thinking, and eventually I realized you were right."

"Odd. I'm surprised you were sober enough to remember that."

"Believe me, I tried to forget it, but it just kept on bothering me. I thought about it for a long time. One day I saw Sakura coming home and making dinner for herself. For some reason that simple action opened my eyes. I started wondering why she was coming home so late and why she was eating and making dinner all alone. Thing was, I had no idea. It occurred to me for the first time that I didn't know anything about my own children anymore."

"Didn't? What, you think that after two weeks, all of a sudden you know everything about us?"

"No." He shakes his head. "There are still things that I don't know about you and your sister. Every so often, she'll be talking and mention something or someone, but I'll have no idea who or what she's referring to." He leans forward. "Did you know she has a job?"

Okay, I can't _not_ glare at him right now. "Of _course_ I know that she has a job. She's worked there for a few years now."

"That's what she said. How can that be? Is it even legal to hire someone that young?"

"Yes. She got a job the minute she was old enough to have one."

"But what about school?"

Oh, he's crossing into dangerous waters right now. I take a deep breath, trying to cool myself off. _You promised her you'd keep your temper in check_, I remind myself. "I've specifically made sure that she understands she's not aloud to drop out. I'm not about to let her go down the same path I did."

Clearly, he has no idea what I'm talking about.

"She didn't tell you? I dropped out of high school senior year."

"What?" he chokes out.

"Yeah. You lost your job, and since my part time job alone wasn't enough to pay the bills, I dropped out and got a job full time in order to support Sakura. How did you think that we were still living here?"

"I never really gave it much thought. What about the savings accounts?"

"Nearly empty. I set aside some money so that once Sakura graduates, we could hopefully leave here and rent an apartment somewhere. And by 'we' I mean Sakura and I."

Fujitaka holds his head between his hands, processing the information.

"It's a lot to take in, I know. We've had to support ourselves while you were out drinking your problems away. Not exactly like you were much help."

Finally, he lifts his head up. "Touya, I-"

"Don't bother. I'm not going to forgive you. To be completely frank, I don't know if I ever will. Even if you do change. We're your children, and you weren't there for us when we needed you. Sakura may be able to overlook it, but I can't." Not after everything we went through.

Fujitaka nods. "I understand. What I did was unforgivable. No child deserves what I put you and Sakura through."

"Glad you finally figured that out, but you're about seven years too late."

"I know. I won't ask for your forgiveness, Touya. I just want to be part of you and your sister's lives again."

"You're aware that we aren't even here most of the time, right?"

"Yes. I am, which is why I've been looking for a job." My head shoots over to him.

"You're _job_ _hunting_?"

He nods. "I went to an interview last week at the library."

"Is that so?" I speculate. "Not going to try to teach again?"

He shakes his head, looking sad. "Maybe one day, but for now I think it's best I don't go around giving advice to young minds."

"Yeah," I agree, grinning cruelly. "That's probably for the best."

A silence passes over us. I glance over to the staircase, wondering what Sakura would be thinking right now if she where here. Knowing her, she'd probably just be happy that our father is finally taking in interest in us and moving forward with his life. She's always been sentimental like that.

"Sakura seems to think it would be good for all of us to go together tomorrow when we visit mom."

He immediately perks up. "She said that?"

I roll my eyes. "Don't look so pleased. Have you even gone to see mom at all since the funeral?"

Regret fills his features. "I know it's shameful of me. When she died, I didn't want to believe it was true. Going to the funeral made it so real, that I've been too afraid to go back."

"But you still want to go tomorrow?"

He nods. "If it's alright with you and Sakura."

"Well, you've got Sakura convinced. For now, I'll go along with this, but only because of Sakura. She seems to think you can change."

"Thank you, Touya."

"Don't thank me; thank Sakura. If it were up to me, I'd leave you here and make you go on your own." He nods, and starts to move. "Oh, and one more thing," I cut in, making him freeze. Looking him dead in the eyes, I say, "If you do anything–and I mean _anything_–to hurt her, you're going to have to answer to me. You got that?"

For the hundredth time, Fujitaka nods. "I won't argue with you there, Touya. She means the world to you, and I wouldn't dare do anything to take her away from you."

"Hey, I never said-"

"You don't have to, I can just tell. If Sakura wants to go with you after she graduates, then I won't stop her, but until then, I'm going to try to be the father she always wanted; the one who's there for her."

I don't say anything at first; just study him. Then, I finally open my mouth and tell him, "In that case, good luck. You'll need it."

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

"Well, that was fast. Is everything alright? How did it go? You're calling from your house, so that's a good thing, right?"

I laugh into the phone. "Yes, Syaoran, everything is alright. At least, I think it is. My dad and brother are downstairs talking."

"Alone?"

"Yep. Touya promised not to do anything. It's progress at least."

"True... So, you're alright then?"

"What do you think?"

"I'm just checking," he says defensively.

"Yes, Syaoran, I'm fine. Happy?"

"Ecstatic."

"Good to hear. Anyways, I've gotta go. I don't want to eavesdrop or anything, but..."

"Right. Say no more, I'll talk to you Monday. Hopefully this time that actually stays true."

"If something happens, I'll go bother Yukito. That, or I'll just sneak into Tomoyo's house without her mom noticing."

"What do you have against Daidouji's mom, anyways?"

"Nothing, really, it's just that she was my mom's cousin, so after my mom died, it became different being around her. She's always worried about Touya and I. Plus she _loathes_ my dad. Not without good reason, but still... That and she intimidates me."

Syaoran chuckles on the other end.

"Hey! Don't laugh at me, it's not funny!"

"Sorry."

I scowl, even though he can't see me. "I'm hanging up now. See you Monday." He starts to say something, but I hang up before he gets the opportunity. It's his own fault, really. Shouldn't have laughed at me. Still, I can't help but smile down at the phone.

_Stupid_ _Syaoran_, I think fondly.

* * *

"Sakura, hurry up!"

"I am hurrying!"

"Well hurry faster!"

"Shut up! Do you have any idea how hard it is to put on a dress? No; so shut up!"

"Just get down here!"

"Why you–hold your damn horses!" Pulling my socks on, I throw open my bedroom door and practically leap down the stairs. "I'm done, okay. You can stop yelling now."

"About time," Touya grumbles, looking up from his watch. I fiddle with the ends of the dress as he looks me up and down.

"So... Does it look alright?"

Touya just stares at me for a moment, then he turns around holding his hands to his face in horror. "When did she get so damn old?"

I sweat-drop. "Um, I can hear you, Touya."

Turning to me and clearing his throat, my brother proclaims, "You can't go out like that. Go back upstairs and change."

"What?" I scream. "You've gotta be kidding me! You were just rushing me and telling me to hurry up, and now you're telling me to go change?"

"I can't have my little sister walking around in something like that."

"What in the world are you referring to?" I look down at the dress. "It's not at all revealing!"

"That's not the point! No boys will be looking at you on my watch. Go and change into something less... feminine."

"You're the one who gave me the dress and told me that mom would be happy if she wore it! Besides, we're going to a _cemetery_."

"We have to pick up the flowers before we go."

"I'm not changing!"

"Oh, yes, you are."

"No!"

"Do it!"

"I won't!"

From behind Touya there's a low chuckle. Leaning around my brother, I find our father standing and laughing quietly while watching us bicker.

"How is it you find this funny?" Touya asks, looking annoyed.

Our father shakes his head. "It's just nice to see my children are so close."

Touya and I exchange a look of confusion. Dad steps by Touya and looks down at me. "I think it looks lovely on you, Sakura."

"Really?" I ask, excited.

"Yes. You look just like your mother."

I gasp. My mother was a beautiful woman; everyone agreed on that. When I was younger, I wanted to be just like her when I grew up. Never did I think it would actually be possible, though.

"Thank you," I say, blushing happily. My father smiles back at me, but Touya grumbles under his breath.

"Shall we be going then?"

"But-"

"Oh, give it a rest, Touya," I say, waving him off.

He glares at me, but keeps quiet. Just like that, all three of us head out of the house in order to go visit the woman we all lost exactly seven years ago from today.

* * *

**Fujitaka's POV**

Even now, seven years later, I still have a hard time facing that Nadeshiko is gone. My life before I met her seems like a dull gray area in comparison to color and life she brought with her that fateful day we met. I've never been happier than when I was with her. She was my everything. The light of my life. And now she's gone.

I kneel before the stone with my wife's name on it. Behind me, our children lower their heads in a silent prayer. My heart warms as they instinctively reach out and hold hands.

_Those are our children, Nadeshiko_.

A faint smile plays at my lips as I watch them. The way that they lean on each other and support one another at the same time is a beautiful thing. Everything those two have gone through has just made them that much closer.

Facing the grave once more, I shut my eyes and pray.

_I'm sorry I wasn't there to see them through it. I'm going to do better, Nadeshiko. For everyone's sake. Yours. Mine. Most importantly, though, for the children. _**_Our_**_ children._

I lift my lids slowly, lifting my hand and allowing my fingers to lightly run across the engraving in the stone.

I flinch slightly, as if jolted awake, when a hand rests on my shoulder. Twisting around, I'm met with the emerald eyes of my daughter. She doesn't say anything, but it's as if she's trying to make me understand something. Her hand gently squeezes my shoulder.

_We're right here_, it seems to say. _You're not alone._

Letting my fingers fall from the cold stone, I cover her hand with my own and rise to my feet. Bringing our hands down between us, I never once let go. Touya watches in silence as I step back into line with him and his sister.

Sakura holds my gaze for a moment before shifting hers forward again. Just like that, all three of us are standing hand-in-hand, mourning over the loss of a loved one. Together; as a family.

* * *

**Ya see what I mean? Depressing and uplifting. No? Yes? Kinda?**

**I'll have you all know, that I was actually considering 3rd person here. Then I tried it and realized that there wasn't a chance in hell 3rd person present was going to be possible. For me anyways. It was... *Shivers* Well, it wasn't a pretty sight. So, basically I just changed it to first person Fujitaka's POV. What'd you all think? For the record, I have no intention of _ever_ using his POV _ever_ again. Ever. I can't stress that enough.**

**Now for that announcement I was talking about last time if you read it.**

**IMPORTANT: Okay, so seeing how it's almost fall, I think a lot of you are going to see where I'm going with this. And where I'm going in general. Yes, that's right. The dreaded _school_. Basically, I won't be able to update as frequently anymore. Don't worry, I'm not going to forget about the story or put it on hiatus or anything like that; I'm just probably not going to be able to post the chapters as often as I do now. Believe me, I'm just as disappointed as you are. I've already started next chapter, if it makes you feel any better. Plus Syaoran is in it (with Sakura, of course).**

**Anyways, You better have read that. Otherwise, I have zero sympathy (yes, I can be heartless at times). I underlined it and everything.**

**Okay, so I guess I'll see you all again next chapter. Which is hopefully a week from now. We'll see. I'll try to use my profile if something comes up.**

**Later!**


	26. First Snow

**...Heeeey. Long time, no post. Like 41 days. I'm tired, and you all just want to read the chapter, so I'm not going to talk much today.**

* * *

**Unknown POV**

"Auntie?"

The elegant woman sitting across the table from me looks up.

"What is it, child?" she asks in her silk voice that always reminds me of a brook, it's water calmly trickling from one location to another.

Readjusting my posture, I look directly at her while I speak. "I've been thinking for a while now about my plans for New Year. It's just that everyone is doing something except for me, and I haven't seen Xiao Lang since the summer..."

"You wish to visit my son in Japan?"

Too anxious to speak, I nod.

"Have you spoken to Xiao Lang about this?"

"Well, no. I was hoping to surprise him."

"You of all people should know by now how much he hates surprises." I hesitate, and before I can reply, she goes on. "Are you just afraid that he is going to try to convince you not to come?" A small smile plays on her lips.

Flustered, I stutter, "Of c-course not."

"No need to defend yourself, my niece. It's fine by me if you go."

Yes! I jump up from my chair and do a little victory jump. "Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, aunt Yelan!"

Across from me, my aunt lifts her glass and says while swirling the wine, "Be sure to contact the house and let them know you're coming. At least let Wei know you will be dropping in for a visit."

Settling back down in my seat, I respectfully agree. "Of course, aunt Yelan. I'll call as soon as dinner is over."

"Good." She pauses, the glass against her lips and lowers it. "Oh, and when you do see Xiao Lang," I look at her expectingly, "tell him to call his mother a little more. Honestly, the boy seems to be calling less and less lately." With that, she tips the glass back and gracefully sips the deep purple liquid.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

The first snow of the winter is today, less than a week before break. We were in class when it happened. I was just absentmindedly staring out the window when something suddenly passed in front of my line of sight. It took a moment for me to start noticing the other little flurries in the air slowly dancing to the ground.

One of my classmates noticed a few seconds later, blurting out the news to everyone. The others spent a good five minutes conversing and hovering by the windows before Mr. Terada finally decided we should probably probably get started on our work again. Unbeknownst to him, any attention I might have been paying to the lesson was gone by then.

As soon as lunch started a few minutes ago, I came out here to the back courtyard in order to just sit and watch it. The first snow of every winter is difficult for me. I still remember the blanket of white that swept the landscape the day of my mother's funeral.

Today, however, I just stand with my arms spread wide and my face lifted to the sky letting the tiny flakes of snow land effortlessly on my cheeks, nose and lips.

"Doesn't that make you cold?"

I lift my lids, but don't turn around. "Just a bit. It's a good sort of cold, though." Lowering my arms, I speak softly, "It reminds me of her. The snow." I slowly kneel down and scoop some up, cupping it in my hands. "She used to make Touya and I hot chocolate with marshmallows after we'd been out for a while," I tell him, smiling at the memory.

There's a crunching sound as Syaoran approaches me. A moment later he's in front of me, holding out his hand. I inclining my head, and our eyes meet. "There's something I want to show you."

Wiping my hands dry, I reach out and let my fingers, still stiff from the cold, slip into his warm hand. He gives my hand a gentle tug. Before I know it, I'm on my feet, holding Syaoran's hand as snow falls around us.

After a moment of silently holding hands and watching the dusty flakes flutter down around us, Syaoran gently squeezes my hand before releasing it. I follow close behind him as he leads us out of the back courtyard.

While we walk, I allow my eyes to take in his figure from behind. It occurs to me that even though I see Syaoran almost every day and spend enormous amounts of time with him, I don't often get to just _look_ at him, which is a shame, because he's incredibly attractive. Even from the back, there's something about him that just seems to draw me in like a magnet. Maybe it's those two little pieces of hair on the back of his head that stick up in two different directions. Or it could be his unnecessarily sexy, broad shoulders. Finally, my eyes travel downwards from his shoulders to his arms. They're both lean and welcoming in a way that makes me just want to curl up in them and let all my troubles vanish from his embrace.

How is it that I don't have to shove my way though a flock of girls every time we're out in public?

Then, he looks back at me, amber eyes bright with mirth. _Ah_, I think to myself. That's right. Syaoran doesn't look at most people that way. He usually puts up a shield to protect himself from people. It's unfortunate that more people don't get to see this side of him, but for some selfish reason I'm a little thankful for it.

Suddenly Syaoran stops walking, and for a moment I think it's because he's caught me staring, but then I notice where we are.

"A tree?" I ask. Syaoran glances over at me and flashes a grin.

"Not the tree, it's what you can see from it."

"You're going to climb it?"

Syaoran shakes his head, chuckling. "No, _we_ are going to climb it."

He's not serious, right? Climbing a tree at school during our lunch break? What is going though this boy's head? He must be joking; although, the pull on my hand is telling me otherwise.

_Great_, I think to myself. Another climbing expedition with Syaoran. Thank goodness I'm wearing leggings this time.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

"How exactly do you expect me to get up there? In case you forgot, most people don't have insane ninja-like abilities when it comes to climbing trees." Under her breath, she adds, "Unlike a certain someone."

"What can I say? Years of practice."

"Yes. As I recall, you used to ditch me at lunch and eat up on your own little isolated branch."

"Oh, yeah. Sorry about that. It gets kinda annoying having lunch with a bunch of girls all the time, though."

"What about poor Yamazaki?"

"He hardly counts as a guy."

"I'd like to see you say that to his face sometime. Let me know before you do, though. It's sure to be interesting."

"It's almost as if you want to see me get beat up. Although, that would never happen. The worst that anyone has ever managed to land on me outside of martial arts training was a slap." I smirk. "In fact, the lady herself is here with us today. Give a warm welcome to Miss Sakura Kinomoto, the only person not in my family to have hit me. Well, aside from martial arts, of course."

"Am I ever going to live that down?"

"Climb up with me and I'll try not to mention it again." I extend my hand for her. She eyes it suspiciously.

"What are you planing?"

I chuckle. "I can't offer to help you climb up a tree without plotting something?"

"Seeing how I've been nothing but a bother to you lately, I wouldn't be surprised if you finally got sick of having to deal with me all the time."

Well, that's just outright impossible. If anything, I want her around even more. And I don't mean just to look at the back of her head during class, as nice as that may be. I want her around more so that I can talk to her. That and finding lame excuses to hold her hand, like–say–climbing a tree. Every time I make her smile or blush, it's like she's just giving me a gold metal for most awesome guy on the planet.

"Hate to break it to you, but you can't get rid of me by bothering me."

"Good to know."

There's a momentary silence in which I just stare at her while she stares right back. "You gonna take my hand any time today?" She blinks and looks down as if she totally forgot that my hand has been extended the entire time.

"Oh, right." She slips her hand in mine, sending tingles up my arm. "So, um, how exactly–ah!" A yelp passes her lips as I pull her up onto the branch with me. "Warning next time, please."

"Sorry about that," I say not at all apologetically. How can I be, though? This is the most fun I've had in quite a while. It feels like we're kids again, back before life happened.

A rush of excitement overwhelms me as I guide her farther up the tree. One branch after another, we slowly ascend higher into the tree until I grab hold of a sturdy branch that's a nice height from the ground. Pulling myself onto it, I sit down and face Sakura, who stands with one hand in mine and the other on the trunk of the tree.

"Alright, your turn."

She eyes the branch doubtfully. "How do you expect me to get up there?"

I roll my eyes. "Come on, it's not that far. Just grab one of the upper branches."

She grumbles and removes her hand from mine to turn around, grab hold of another branch, and pull herself up. While she glances around at her accomplishment, I ball my hand up into a fist, fighting the urge to take her hand again.

"See? Was that so hard?"

In response, she nudges me, then focuses her attention off into the distance.

There's a moment of silence which Sakura breaks when she says, "You were right."

"Hm?" I glance over at her. "About what?"

"The view from up here." She leans back slightly, taking it all in. "It's amazing."

I smirk. "Well, of course. After my many years of climbing trees, I have a mental account of all the best spots in Tomoeda."

Sakura gives me a look of disbelief. "You should really try to find a new hobby." All I can do is laugh. She's probably right.

Switching the topic, I say, "So, only two more days before break. Are you excited?"

Her eyes immediately light up. "Oh my gosh, of course! I can't wait for New Years. Wouldn't it be awesome if it snowed?"

"No," I say plainly. Looking around, I add, "Really wish it weren't snowing right now, either. I should've showed you the school's indoor heating, instead."

Sakura tries to suppress a grin while shaking her head. "You are so weird, Syaoran. You've lived in Japan most of your life; how do you still hate the cold so much?"

"If only I knew." And if only she knew that I ask myself that exact same question every winter.

"Well," she begins, "you can stay inside drinking hot chocolate all day while everyone else has fun." Very abruptly, she turns to me as if remembering something. "Oh, I almost forgot! Are you going back to Hong Kong for the break?"

I shake my head. "No, my mom has some sort of business thing she's going to this year. Twenty-fifth anniversary for something. As for my sisters, I'm pretty sure they're all doing their own things. Fuutie is going with my mom to learn more about the business. Shiefa said something about going to the tropics with her boyfriend." Sakura's jaw drops. "As for Fanren and Feimei, those two have been going on and on about some sort of fashion show thing that's supposedly a big deal."

"Wow." She takes a while to process everything. "Should I feel bad that I have no idea who is who anymore?"

I try not to laugh. "No, it's been a while."

"Good to know." A downcast look crosses her face. "That's actually kinda sad." I'm confused until she goes on, saying, "That you don't get to see your family."

I shrug. "Yeah, but I'm going to see them after graduation, so..." The look on Sakura's face makes my voice die in my throat. "Are you alright?"

"Huh?" She looks up at me, almost startled. "Yeah, of course. What makes you ask?"

For a minute, I struggle for the right words, but then just shrug it off, going back to what we were initially talking about. "So, I hear everyone is planning a get-together right before the new year."

"Actually, from what I understand, it's going to be New Years Eve. Everyone was planning to go to the shrine together. The girls want to go sing karaoke afterwards."

I cringe, and Sakura laughs.

"I know; I feel the same way. I've already had to go once, and it was pure torture."

"At least it's an indoor activity that I don't have to partake in."

"Of course, for you it's optional. For me, if I go, I will be dragged up and forced to sing against my will."

"Don't you sing at the café you work at?"

"Yeah, but that's different. When I sing at the café, it's part of my job. I get paid."

"Big difference."

She shakes her head, and ignores the comment. "So, are you going?"

"To the New Years Eve thing?" She nods. I shrug, and she immediately scowls.

"Don't just _shrug_. Look a little excited. It'll be fun! There will be stalls set up and everything!"

"I'm not crazy about all the stalls. Plus there are so many people all clustered in one area."

"You've gotta be kidding me. Aren't you the one who's supposed to take over a business when you graduate from university?"

"What's that got to do with-"

"How are you going to run a business when you can't stand being around people. Businesses are all about relationships, right?"

I give her a half-lidded look. She can't seriously be using this against me right now.

"That's different. I don't like crowds."

"Admit it, you don't like talking to people in general."

"Okay, now you're not even trying to prove your point anymore."

"That's debatable."

_Ugh_. Can't she just give me a break. "Never-mind, then. Just forget it."

"What ever you say, Mr. Wise-guy."

I smirk. "Don't you mean 'Mr. Perfect'?" Sakura's face immediately turns bright red.

"W-why you..."

Before she can proceed to yell at me and call me all sorts of foul-mouthed names, a voice interrupts us from below.

"Hey! Sakura! Li!" We both lean forward to find Chiharu and the others below us. "Lunch is almost over. We've been looking all over for you two. What are you doing up in a tree?"

Next to her, a glint appears in Yanagisawa's glasses. "Kissing possibly?"

_Psh_. I wish. Er... _Cough_. I mean, of course we aren't.

Chiharu, Takashi and Daidouji all try not to laugh at that. I avoid looking over at Sakura.

"No," Sakura defends.

"Oh, it's alright, Sakura. You don't need to be shy about it."

"You've got it all wrong!"

_Ugh. Kill me now._

"Then why are you two siting in a _tree_ together and avoiding the rest of us?"

"We aren't avoiding you guys! I came out back to think and then Syaoran showed up."

"Doesn't explain the tree?"

"T-that's," Sakura sputters. "What difference does it make, anyways?"

"Well, the saying goes, 'sitting in a _tree,_ k-i-s-s-i-n-g'."

As the two go back and forth, I lift my head up and turn to Sakura. "Can we just get down from here already?"

"Oh." It's like she forgot I was sitting next to her. "Yeah. Better go before we're late."

Who cares what the reason is? Just get me out of this damn tree. I'm never climbing one again. Not when anyone else is around, anyways.

As she clumsily steps down from the branch we're on, Sakura almost slips, nearly giving me a heart attack.

"This is a lot harder than it was to get up. Thank goodness I wore leggings today."

"Were you _planning_ to climb a tree?"

"You're the one who's idea this was," she defends. "I wore them because Touya seemed to think it was going to snow today. And he was right."

"Go figu–Sakura!" Her foot slips slightly, causing her to lose her balance. I immediately lunge forward and grab her around the waist. "Be careful!"

It takes her a minute to steady herself using my shoulder and the trunk. "All good. Don't freak out." She looks over at me and her eyes narrow. "How is it that you haven't slipped? You don't even have anything to hold onto."

Ha! "I'm just that skilled."

Now she's glaring daggers at me. Okay, maybe that was a little smug.

"Kidding." I point at the branches around us. "Just grab onto one and you'll be fine."

"You two be careful, alright?" Daidouji stares up at us looking terrified, as if she were the one in the tree.

"We're alright, Tomoyo," Sakura shouts down. Then adds under her breath, "For now."

"Relax. We aren't even that high up."

"We're like ten feet off the ground! Don't sound so relaxed!"

"Since when were you afraid of heights, anyways?"

"I'm not, I'm just worried that since I'm in a _tree_, and I'm not good at climbing, I could potentially fall and die."

"Die? At ten feet?"

"Oh, if you don't shut up, I'm going to strangle you!"

"Or you could just _push_ me. Apparently that'd kill me, too!" Maybe I should stop talking soon... She looks like she really _does_ want to push me.

Taking a deep breath, but keeping the hostility in her voice, she say, "No, because you'd probably just magically land on your feet. Now, will you _please_ let go of me?"

Let go of... My eyes travel down. "Oh, sorry." I pull my arm from around her waist.

"Hey, would you two stop flirting and get down here already?"

"Forget you, I'm going after them when we finally get down there."

Sure. Whatever you say, Sakura. I think I'll just laugh and hope she doesn't change her mind. I'd at least like to make it to eighteen.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

"You know, I don't remember ever agreeing to this."

"Oh, quit your complaining. You said yesterday that you would help. Besides, you're just choosing what shade you think I should use."

"Maybe so, but... But..." Touya nearly shouts my ear off as he demands, "Why are you making something like this in the first place?"

I cringe away, rubbing my ringing ears.

Break started two days ago, so I asked Touya yesterday if he would help me with picking out a color for a scarf I want to make. He agreed reluctantly, which is why we're standing in the family room right now arguing about shades of yarn.

"It's a gift for a friend. A thank you present, sort of."

"Which friend?"

"Does it matter?"

"It does if the friend is _male_."

"Whatever would give you that idea?" I ask innocently.

Touya glares down at me and grabs the ball of yarn from my hands. "Because this is _green_."

"So?" I snatch the yarn away from him. "Girls can wear green, too, you know."

"I have never seen any girl wearing anything _this_ shade of green. If the person is a girl, why not use pink–or purple if it's Tomoyo."

"It's not Tomoyo."

"Then it's a boy."

"You know, I really don't see what difference it makes. And either way, it's none of your business," I state.

"Actually, it is. I'm your brother."

"Exactly. Brother; not parent."

"Oh, so that's how you wanna play it?"

"It is in fact."

We both turn to the man sitting across the room, reading the newspaper and sitting on the couch. "Dad!" He looks up from his newspaper.

"Does it matter to you wether I give a gift to a male friend versus a female friend?"

"Keeping in mind that you know nothing about who this person is or what their intentions are with our precious Sakura," Touya butts in.

"Do you think I associate with known sociopaths or something?"

"Of course not!" I smirk in triumph. "They're obviously not _known_, or I'd hope even someone as dense as you would be smart enough to figure out to stay away."

Damn him! I slam my heel into the floor, but before I get a chance to talk back, our father interrupts by clearing his throat.

"Is it safe for me to speak now?" Touya and I exchange dark looks, but then turn back to our father and nod. "Good. Now, I believe that Sakura is mature enough now to decide who she does and does not associate with."

"But-"

"Not long from now, neither of us will have a say in the matter. She's almost eighteen."

Beside me, Touya grumbles something under his breath, glaring off to the side.

"Touya."

He looks back at our father, rolling his eyes as he turns his head. "What?" he grumbles.

"From what I can see, you've done a wonderful job raising her. Sakura can take care of herself. No matter how much you want her to yourself, one day she won't need you there for her anymore."

"Excuse me?" Wow, there. Now he's starting to looked pissed.

Still relaxed, our father explains, "You love your sister, and you want to protect her. That's fine. In fact, it's natural. Parents feel something similar towards their children."

At the parenting comment, Touya winces. "I'm _twenty-four_."

"And single," I cough under my breath.

"Age has nothing to do with it. You're her brother." Nod. "You love her, and want to protect her." Nod. "Even if that sometimes means restricting her freedom." Nod. Nod. "Possibly by keeping her away from anyone who you see as a threat to the natural order of things."

"Like the entire male population," Touya mumbles, looking down and rubbing his chin, deep in thought. "Maybe if found some sort of boy-repellent."

"Uh-huh," I sarcastically agree. "And how do _you_ plan to be anywhere near me, then?"

"It would only work on guys your age."

Spotting an opportunity, I ask, "What makes you think he's the same age as me?"

"So it _is_ a he!"

Crap. Okay, I walked right into that one. "Fine, I'll admit it. I'm making a think you gift for one of my guy friends. Is there really anything wrong with that?"

"Yes! There is! Who is this friend? The last I checked, you didn't have any guy friends."

I think a vein just popped in my head. "Actually, I do. I'll have you know that my circle of friends has become considerably larger."

"And now you associate with boys?"

"Yes, Touya! I have friends who are guys. If it makes you feel any better, one of them is dating Tomoyo, and the other has been in love with the same girl since we were kids."

"Huh?" Touya begins shouting again. "You're friends with that kid? I thought I told him to stay away from you!"

"I was talking about Yamazaki, and Syaoran is not a kid!"

Touya suddenly blinks and his eyes narrow in suspicion. "_Syaoran_?" he spits out the name. "I thought you called him by his last name now. And why are you defending that brat?"

"I-I'm not." Crap! I'm so exposed!

"Touya," our father calls from behind us. "I know that you may not like the boy, but he's good for her."

"Wait, what? You knew about this?" Touya turns to me, pointing at our father. "Okay, how come it feels like you tell him everything now-a-days instead of me?"

"Because I know dad won't totally freak out when I tell him who my friends are."

"Ha! Friends, you say."

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

Touya looks away, avoiding my eyes. "Nothing."

Why does he do this? He's always been like this when it comes to talking about Syaoran. He'll say something weird and then refuse to explain. I've learned to just go with it, but it still annoys the crap out of me. At this point, all I can really do is shake my head and ignore it.

"Dad's right. Syaoran has helped me out a lot lately."

"Oh, I wonder why that is."

"Okay, that's it! What's with the sarcasm, Mr. Wise-Guy? Syaoran's been there for me a lot recently–so, yes, I'll admit it. He's the one I'm making this for."

"Should've know. That brat always _was_ obsessed with green, wasn't he?" He meets my eyes. "Ironic, when you think about it."

"Well I'm not thinking about it. I'm making a scarf as a thank you. Is that alright by you, or do I need to get permission first?"

"I doubt that's the 'thank you' he had in mind."

"Touya!" My face burns red as I try to shove out the horrifying possibilities of what he could be implying. "Stop saying weird things and just tell me which stupid color to use."

"None of the above. That brat doesn't deserve a gift. He doesn't even deserve your friendship, for that matter. Why are you hanging out with him again, anyways? I thought you hated him for what he did to you."

How many times am I going to have to retell this story to people? "I held a grudge, but then we talked and decided to put the past behind us," I say, before adding, "Like mature adults." Touya rolls his eyes.

"So you two are happy-go-lucky pals again?" Now I'm rolling my eyes.

"More or less. We bicker, and I may have slapped him the other day, but-"

"Woah, wait. You _slapped_ him?" Touya stands in front of me grinning ear to ear and clapping his hands together in amusement. "I really did teach you well. Seems unlike you, but that damn brat had it coming. Up top, squirt."

Has he always been this much of a jerk? How am I just now seeing this?

I glare in disgust at the hand he holds up, then over at him as he continues to look proud and smug. "It's not something to hi-five over, Touya. I felt–no, I _feel_ really bad about it. He was just trying to help me, but I ended up hitting him for it. Of course it wasn't really intentional, but still..."

"Don't feel so bad. After everything he did to you, he deserved it."

Memories of all the times I ignored Syaoran begin to fill my mind. Ignoring, hissing cruel words, dealing death glares–I did it all.

"You're just making me feel worse, Touya." Hanging my head, I sigh in frustration and turn to leave. "Never mind, I'll pick out the color myself. I know Syaoran better anyways. Thanks for the _help_," I hiss, my grip tightening on the balls of yarn. Ignoring Touya, I race up to my room.

* * *

Okay, Sakura.

I stand in front of Syaoran's apartment pacing back and forth.

You can do this. It's _just_ a scarf. Nothing big.

Pausing in front of the door, I raise my hand, poised to knock, only to stop less than an inch from the door and retract my hand, returning to my pacing.

But what if he doesn't like it? Is it weird for me to give him a scarf out of the blue? _So weird_. He'll probably think I'm even more strange than he used to. What if he laughs at me?

Nope. No, no, no. This was a bad idea. Very bad. I should just go home and pretend I never came to visit him early. If I leave now and show up at the original meeting place, he'll never even know that I stopped by.

Yeah. That'll work. It'll have to.

Turning around, and beginning to walk away, I'm stopped in my tracks at the sound of a door opening behind me.

Keep walking; it might not even be him.

"Sakura?"

Darn it! Why doesn't anything ever go my way when it comes to this guy?

Plastering a huge smile on my face and thrusting my hands behind my back, I spin on my heels to face him.

"Syaoran!"

It takes serious will-power to keep my face looking innocent as he asks, "What are you doing here? Weren't we supposed to meet up in front of the shrine?"

"Er, yeah, but I just thought I'd drop by. I finished getting ready early and figured I could come over and say hi to Wei," I say, lying through my teeth. As I walk up to him, I glance down at what he's wearing, giving him a disapproving look. "Come on, you aren't wearing _that_ are you?"

He looks down at his jeans and t-shirt. "What's wrong with it?"

_Nothing_, I want to say. _You're drop dead gorgeous_.

Holding my tongue, I say, "It's New Year's Eve. Surely you have a kimono somewhere in your closet."

His face scrunches. "How is a kimono going to keep me warm?" He looks down at me. "You look nice, but aren't you freezing?"

I blush at the comment and shake my head. "Nope," I say, trying to ignore the way his eyes linger on my hands clasped behind my back.

"What are you hiding?"

"Hiding? What do you mean?"

"Behind your back."

Crap. "Nothing." He quirks an eyebrow. "Er, I mean my purse!"

"Right. Well, Wei and I were just making some snacks for tomorrow if you wanna join in."

I grin eagerly. "Sure! Although I'm not really sure what I'll be able to do if you're the one cooking."

Amber eyes shine with amusement. "You can do the decorating. After all, you have the practice."

True, I do have experience in the arts.

"Works for me!" Forgetting about the bag in my hands, I spring forward into the apartment. Looking around, I wonder aloud, "Where's Wei?"

"Kitchen." Syaoran steps around me and leads the way down the hall. In the living room, he points to the coffee table and grins evilly at me. "You can set your 'purse' down there if you like."

Why you–

"'Kay, thanks!" With a fake smile plastered on my face, I reluctantly set the the green gift bag down on the table, not meeting Syaoran's amused gaze.

"Nice purse," he says sarcastically. "Never knew fashion took such a... unique turn."

"Oh, shut it," I grumble, shoving past him to the kitchen. Inside, I find Wei working on the food.

"Wei-san!" Without hesitating, I race up to him and give him a quick hug. "Happy New Year!" Pulling away, I add, "Well, technically it's still Eve."

"And a happy New Year's Eve to you as well, Sakura-sama."

"I've got the a-okay to help out, so what can I do?" I quickly run my hands through the sink and return to Wei's side.

"She's on decorating duty," Syaoran says from the other end of the counter.

Wei nods at this. "In that case, I've got just the thing."

And so the three of us hustle around the kitchen for the next fifteen minutes or so, all doing our own things and trying not to run into each other.

"Done!" I claim victoriously.

"Thank you for your help, Sakura-sama."

I smile up at Wei. "My pleasure."

Syaoran walks up beside me. "We should probably head out. If we don't leave soon, we'll be late."

"Would you like a ride?"

"That's alright, Wei." Syaoran glances at me. "Do you mind?"

I shrug. "Only if you you do. It's getting colder and colder out, you know." The way he cringes makes me laugh.

"On second thought..."

"Nope! We are going to walk and enjoy the wonderful scenery exclusive to Tomoeda, Japan." I lead the way into the living room again. "Besides, it isn't too bad out."

"Alright, but if you get cold, I'm not giving you my jacket this time."

"Fair enough."

_There it is_. My eyes fall upon the gift bag, and I am once again filled with dread. Syaoran starts to say something, then stops.

"What's with the face?"

I frown. Should I give it to him? He's already seen the bag; if I walk around the festival with it, that would look strange.

So I should give it to him.

But what if he doesn't like it? Maybe he'll think it's weird that I'm giving him a gift even though we're just friends. Is that weird? Friends give each other gifts sometimes... Right?

"Sakura?" My head shoots up to find concerned amber eyes watching me.

"U-um... I..." You can do this! It's a present, not a love confession.

Grabbing the bag, I thrust it forward, my cheeks ablaze. "Here."

I half expect him to tease me, but he just glances at me before taking the bag. "May I?" Nod. Time seems to slow as his hand reaches into the bag and slowly draws out the green scarf. He sets down the bag while I ring my fingers, anxiously tugging them.

Syaoran doesn't say anything as he unfolds the scarf and examines it. I, on the other hand, open my mouth and can't seem to shut it again.

"It's a scarf. You're always saying how much you hate the winter because it's so cold, so I just kind of figured you might like something that could keep you warm. I'm not very good with sewing like Tomoyo, so it's the best I could do. And you're, like, super obsessed with green. I actually had Touya help me decide on a what shade to use. Well, I mean, I say 'help', but he didn't really do anything. It was kind of a big deal, because he was freaking out that I was making something green, since–_apparently_–green is a guy color. I took offense to that. Not that green is my favorite color or anything, but it's still pretty high on my list of-"

I'm cut off by an uncharacteristically loud and amused laugh from Syaoran. He sets down the gift bag and walks over to me, the scarf still in his hands. "I love it, Sakura." Then, my heart almost leaps right out of my chest as he pulls me in for a hug and whispers, "Thank you," into my ear.

I try to speak, but all I end up being able to do is nod.

Out of nowhere, there's a loud knock on the door. Syaoran pulls away, looking just as surprised as me.

"Expecting someone?" I ask, disappointed by the sudden loss of his arms around me.

He shakes his head. "Not that I know of."

I follow slowly behind him as he sets down the scarf on the table and heads down the hall, stopping at the door. When he leans forward to check the peep-hole, I ask, "Who is it?"

Without answering, Syaoran pales and abruptly jerks away from the door as if it tried to harm him.

"What?" I step around him to look through the peep-hole for myself, but before I get a chance, Syaoran grabs hold of me, one hand covering my mouth and the other wrapping around my waist. I squeak through his hand as he pulls me back.

Before I know it, he's dragged us around the corner at the end of the hall. As I manage to struggle enough to turn around to face him, Syaoran covers my mouth again and pushes me against the wall. I let out a muffled cry of alarm as the other lays dominantly against the side of my head, palm flat against the wall.

"Ow-wan." I struggle against him, trying to call out his name through the hand against my mouth.

"Don't move."

I immediately freeze, then mentally curse myself for listening to him when he's got me shoved up against a wall.

His entire body presses against mine, making it even more difficult to breath. Our chests both move, breathing in. My heart pounds so hard that I'm afraid he'll be able to feel it. It's almost enough to make me faint. Then a female voice comes shouting from down the hall.

"Xiao Lang!" It proceeds to go on speaking in a foreign language, too fast for me to determine which.

"O's iao wang?" Translation: Who's Xiao Lang.

Syaoran swears under his breath as the voice goes on. Finally, his grip on me loosens enough for me to push his hand away. "Who's Xiao Lang? Do you know who that girl is?"

He ignores me, sighing and stepping away from me, creating distance between us. I'm not sure if I should be relieved that I can breath again, or sad that I can't feel his body anymore. Geez, when did I start thinking such crude things?

"Why do these things always happen to me?" Syaoran grumbles, trudging down the hall and opening the door.

On the other side stands a beautiful, tall Chinese girl with long ebony hair pulled into two long, silky pigtails and the most mesmerizing scarlet eyes I've ever seen. The vibrant orbs seem like molten lava in the form of the most beautifully crafted rubies.

"Wow," I mumble. She's probably one of the most beautiful girls I've ever seen. Then she opens her mouth and that admiration turns to pure despise.

"Syaoran!" Before I can even blink, she's lunging forward and tackling the poor boy in question to death.

I half expect him to push her off him or tell her to let go, but he doesn't move. He just stands there and lets the strange girl cling to him.

Then, as if he's just trying to kill me, he lifts his arms and returns the gesture.

"Hey, Meiling," he says sounding worn out. "It's been a while."

* * *

**Haha. I could say that last line to you guys. Right, anyways, this chapter is kind of like that first episode in a new season of anime when they've resolved one plot in the last season and now they're setting you up for the next. You know what I mean? ...Maybe? Never mind, I'm just going to go now.**

**Until next time... Whenever that may be... (*Collapses on bed* Chapter 26: Most annoying chapter EVER.)**


	27. Happy New Years

**Holy hello, people! Hahaha. I know, I'm weird. But, oh my gosh, I am so excited! I FINALLY finished! It's been over a month in the making, but Chapter 27 is finally here! *Grins evilly* And I think you all will find it was well worth the wait... Well, hopefully. If not, you may as well just stop reading the story, because it's the best I've got.**

**SO FAR!**

**Haha, yeeeeaaah. So, anyways, the chapter totals to 7,830 words in my pages document. It is BY FAR the ****_longest_**** chapter as of yet. Hopefully it stays the longest, because it took way too long to write and edit.**

**Before I go, I'd like to let anyone who is interested know that I intend to re-post the first few chapters because they have SERIOUS grammatical errors in them. So, if you don't have any idea what's going on or just want to go back and reread some, then those will hopefully be up by Thanksgiving.**

**Okay, enough of this, it's time for you all to start reading. Better start now, or you'll never finish. (Just kidding, but seriously... Super long.)**

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

It's New Year's Eve and _somehow_ I've found myself standing in my living room with both my cousin, who I thought was in Hong Kong, and the girl I'm in love with, who is probably interpreting this situation entirely the wrong way. This should be one hell of a way to start the new year, don't you think?

Some people wonder why I hate surprises so much, well this is just one instance I would like to point out.

"Meiling," I nervously begin. My cousin has a rather _expressive_ personality. One wrong move and she'll have my head. "I didn't know you were in Japan."

Pulling away, she clasps her hands behind her back and leans forward. "I wasn't." She pauses. "Well, I was, but not until about an hour ago. Would've been less, but customs took longer than I expected."

"Right." I scratch the back of my head, looking behind her at the suitcase sitting just outside the apartment. "So, um, what's with the suitcase?"

Meiling slaps me on the shoulder while slipping by me into the apartment. "Well, I didn't fly here all the way from Hong Kong just to spend the night." As Meiling advances, she locks eyes with Sakura, and there's a pause in her stride. A dark look of mischief and curiosity passes my cousin's face. Sakura stands stiffly composed while Meiling examines her.

All the while, I exit the apartment to get the hot pink suitcase from outside and carry it in, my eyes never shifting from the pair's interaction. This should be interesting.

With the click of her tongue, Meiling harshly twists to face me again, her hair swishing around from the abrupt movement. "Who's your _friend_, Syao?" The way she says the word 'friend' with such bitterness makes me cringe.

Hesitating, I awkwardly step by the two and set Meiling's things down in the living room. Of course, when I turn, both girls are watching me in anticipation. "I suppose I should introduce you two."

"That would be nice. You know how much I love meeting your friends, Syao."

I wish she would stop calling me that. Every time she calls me by my nickname, Sakura's eyes dart between us as if she's afraid of something.

"Right, well," I step up beside them. "Meiling, this is Sakura. Sakura, Meiling."

Meiling's eyes immediately widen, then harshly narrow in suspicion. "_Sakura_?" The girl in question flinches slightly as Meiling stabs her with a wicked glare. "As in _the_ Sakura?"

There are a million ways this could go wrong. I clear my throat. "Yes, Meiling, this is Sakura Kinomoto."

Just like that, Meiling's semi-polite attitude turns to straight-out rudeness. She shifts her weight onto one leg, swaying her hips, and crosses her arms just below her chest, pulling her shoulders back. "You don't say." Her eyes openly scrutinize Sakura as they rake up and down her figure. "I don't see what all the fuss was about; she's nothing special."

Horrified, I harshly snap out at her. "Meiling!"

From the way Sakura self-consciously reaches for the sleeves of her kimono and bites her lip, I can tell Meiling's words have affected her. What she doesn't realize is that every little thing that escapes Meiling's mouth is nonsense she's spewing to put down her newfound enemy.

Across from Sakura, Meiling simply shrugs.

Tight-throated, Sakura manages to ask, "Have we met before?"

Meiling shoots her a look of distaste. "Thankfully not, but I've heard a lot about you."

Her eyes darting in my direction, Meiling smirks and strides towards me. "I should properly introduce myself. My dear Xiao Lang seems to be shy today." Before I can stop her, Meiling has linked her arm into mine and is leaning against me, letting her head fall against my shoulder. "I'm Meiling Li, Syaoran's _fiancé_."

At her words, I find myself choking on air. My _what_?

Much to my horror, Sakura actually seems to buy it, her eyes widening and darting between me and the girl who is currently hanging off of me.

"Fiancé?"

I open my mouth to answer. Tell her it's a lie, and that she's just my cousin, but before I can, Meiling has already started speaking again. "That's right, so you can go and find some other guy to bother, because this one is taken." As if an afterthought, Meiling looks Sakura up and down once more before spitting cruelly, "Besides, my Xiao Lang would never be interested in some frail little Japanese girl."

"Meiling!" Officially disgusted by my cousin's behavior, I jerk my arm out of her grasp and glare harshly down at her. "I don't know what's gotten into you, but knock it off now before I really get mad."

Meiling seems surprised for a moment, then her eyes narrow once more, this time in suspicion. "Why are you defending her? She's the one who caused your depression, isn't she? The bitch doesn't deserve to be anywhere near you. Why the hell is she even here? This is unbelievable. I come here expecting a warm welcome, but instead I'm greeted by the same little-"

"Meiling." Just like that her mouth snaps shut, not daring to speak anymore. She continues to glare at Sakura with enough force to pierce the brunette's skin. Sakura's hurt eyes follow me as I step towards her. I give her an apologetic look and stand beside her, facing my stunned cousin. "Sakura is here because we're friends, and are going to celebrate the new year together. If you have a problem with that, you can talk to _me_ about it, but leave Sakura alone; she never did anything."

Satisfied with my lecture, I redirect my attention to Sakura. "Ignore everything Meiling said; she's just jealous."

"Me? Jealous?"

"Yes, Meiling," I say, looking over at her.

"As if. I'm protecting you, Syaoran. We both know what happened the last time you got too close to the Kinomoto girl."

"Well that was then and this is now. So, if you'll excuse us, Sakura and I have to go meet up with some of our friends." I lead Sakura down the hall, snatching the forest green scarf from the coffee table as I pass, and before exiting, I turn back to Meiling to add, "By the way, when I get back, you and I have some serious talking to do, especially about you dropping in unannounced."

Meiling cringes slightly, and I can't help but smirk. She shouldn't have showed up unannounced then insulted the girl who I'm in love with. Very bad combo.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Here I thought that going to see Syaoran early would just mean having to give him the gift, but apparently along with embarrassing myself, I also got a nice insult session to go along with it. From Syaoran's apparent 'fiancé' nonetheless, a girl who–up until less than ten minutes ago–I didn't even know. I should've just ignored his voice and kept on walking when I heard him call out to me before.

We've been walking for at least five minutes now, and all Syaoran has done in that time has been apologize. He has still yet to explain how after knowing each other for ten years, he's never once mentioned the existence of a fiancé of all things. What is she even doing in Japan, anyways? Clearly she knows Syaoran from Hong Kong, because she was calling him Xiao Lang and speaking in what I assume was Cantonese.

"Hey, are you going to ignore me forever? I already told you not to listen to Meiling. She's just bitter because of how I treated her when my mom made me go back to Hong Kong all those years ago."

I just keep walking, trying not to let his words affect me.

Finally, Syaoran sighs and shakes his head, running a hand through his wild hair. "Alright, I get it. Go ahead and give me the silent treatment if it makes you feel better."

At that, I shoot a side-glance at him. Part of me wants to pat his shoulder and tell him I'm not mad, but to be honest, I kinda am. Even if he doesn't know that I have feelings for him, we're still friends and he should've told me that he was engaged.

After making him suffer for another few seconds, I finally decide to say, "Your fiancé sure seems nice, don't you think?"

Oddly enough, Syaoran's head suddenly snaps back to me. "Fiancé?"

Great, playing dumb. What's the point when I was standing right there when this 'Meiling' stated it herself? While hanging off his arm, might I add. "Yeah, Syaoran, your _fiancé_. You know, the girl who I'd never met before that just insulted me because I'm hanging out with you. That fiancé."

Syaoran proceeds to stare at me completely dumbfounded before finally saying, "You mean Meiling?"

I give an exasperated nod, and Syaoran suddenly stops walking and grabs me by the arm to stop me as well. Irritated, I glare up at him. "What?" I snap.

Almost desperately, Syaoran steps close to me and states, "Sakura, Meiling isn't my fiance, she's my cousin."

Wait what? "Um, no, that's not what she said."

"Well I'm telling you that she was lying."

"Why would she lie about something like that?"

"She's jealous! Meiling made a deal with me that if I ever fell in love, she'd back off, so she doesn't like me getting too close to anyone, especially since I only see her a few times a year."

"What? But…" I struggle with my words.

"Look," Syaoran's thumb rubs against my arm, making me look briefly down at it. "I'm not engaged, alright? If I were, I think I would've told my best friend by now."

Meeting his gaze, I find myself both pleased and disappointed as I ask, "You think of me as your best friend?"

Syaoran shyly pulls away and shoves his hands in his pockets. "Well, yeah, I guess. We've been through a lot together, and I just thought-"

Nudging him, I blush slightly saying, "Relax, I think of you as one of my best friends, too." Jokingly, I add, "Second to Tomoyo, of course. Don't get ahead of yourself."

Syaoran chuckles, sounding somewhat relieved. "I wouldn't dream of it."

With that, we start walking again, but something weighs on my mind. We're nearing the shrine when I finally muster the courage to say, "Syaoran, you said that you're not engaged right now?"

He glances back at me, an eyebrow raised. "Yeah, I do believe that's what we were just clearing up."

I nod slowly. "So... Does that mean you're... that you've... fallen in love?" Just thinking about it makes me feel sick. The thought of Syaoran being in love with someone else, and that person doing all the things with him that I've dreamt of, it's as if there's a barbell being pressed against my chest, constricting my breathing and making my heart throb painfully.

There's a slight pause in his stride, but he doesn't let himself fall far behind. "I guess that's what I said, isn't it?"

Anxiety tugging at me, I finally give in and cut him off just as we're about to reach the entrance of the shrine. "Wait." I hold up my hand and gently press it against the center of his chest to make him stop. Not daring to meet his gaze, I force myself to say, "Syaoran if… If there were someone who you… who you are in love with, you'd tell me, right?"

I hold my breath in anticipation, but nothing comes. The corners of my lips tug down against my will and I don't dare look up.

Right when I hear Syaoran start to say my name, it comes from a completely different direction. "Sakura! Li!"

Biting my cheeks, I quickly turn around before Syaoran can see me. "Chiharu, happy New Year's Eve!"

She catches me in an embrace then lets go to ask, "Where have you guys been?" Looking back at Syaoran, she adds, "And why are you two getting here at the exact same time?"

Not liking the slight suggestive tone in her voice, I explain. "I decided to swing by Syaoran's before coming here because I needed to drop something off."

Chiharu raises her eyebrows and nods slowly. Thankfully, the others come up from behind her, effectively stopping any more questions.

"Hey, you two, happy New Year's Eve."

From Naoko's seemingly innocent greeting, Yamazaki suddenly chimes in with his signature phrase, "Speaking of New Years, did you know…" Although, he never finishes the thought with Chiharu slapping him upside the head without so much as looking at him. Yamazaki laughs while she continues to disregard him.

"Sorry if we made you guys wait long."

"Not at all," Tomoyo tells me, walking closer and smiling familiarly. For the briefest second, she flashes me a concerned look, to which I give her a small, weak smile. Somehow Tomoyo always seems to know whenever something is bothering me. It's both a blessing and a curse.

Rika goes on to say something while I meet Tomoyo midway and whisper hushed words into her ear, to which she nods and we return our attention to the others. Most of them doesn't seem to notice the interaction, but I can feel a certain pair of amber eyes watching me.

Several minutes later, all eight of us find ourselves shuffling through the crowds as we make our way closer to the shrine. Tomoyo and I walk in step with each other while the others continue on ahead of us.

"What's on your mind, Sakura?"

Being sure to glance Syaoran's way first, I shift my attention to the purple haired girl beside me and explain the events of the evening. Everything from my indecisive debate as to whether or not I should give Syaoran the scarf I made for him, to the sudden appearance of his cousin/formal fiancé. The entire time, Tomoyo listens attentively as if I'm going to quiz her on the information at the end.

When I finally get to the part about Syaoran having someone who he's in love with, Tomoyo's demeanor begins to shift from serious to mildly annoyed.

"This is serious, Tomoyo. What if he..." I glance over to our party to make sure none of them–especially Syaoran–are listening. Lowering my voice, I ask, "What if he's in love with someone? I don't know what I'll do, Tomoyo. I mean, it's not like I expect him to ever return my feelings, but for him to be in love with someone else... I'm not sure I'll be able to cope with losing him again a second time."

With an exasperated sigh, Tomoyo stops walking and turns fully to me. "I love you, Sakura, but you really can be an idiot sometimes."

Taken aback, I blink a few times. "Huh?"

Disregarding my obvious confusion, she just challenges in a way that reminds me of Chiharu, "If this is really so important to you, why don't you just tell him how you feel?"

"Tell him?" I practically shout. A few people walking by glance our way, but the others have managed to get too far ahead to hear. Lowering my voice again, I quietly demand, "Are you insane? If I tell Syaoran, it's sure to ruin our friendship."

Tomoyo briefly rubs her temples, then pulls her arms down and asks me as if it's the most obvious thing in the world, "And if he feels the same way?"

The question stumps me. She looks dead serious, but the suggestion is too far-fetched to be anything but a joke. "He doesn't," I state simple and surely.

"Have you asked him? Has he ever outright said, 'I don't like you, Sakura'?"

"No, but-"

"But if he hasn't told you, then you'll never know for sure, so stop making assumptions."

For a long moment, I just stand there gawking at her and trying figure out what's come over her.

Of course Syaoran doesn't like me. If he did, he surely would've told me, right? Besides, he has no reason to like me. All I am is a nuisance to him. The only reason why he's always helping me is because he's a kind person and we're friends. There's no other reason. If there were, he would've said something, or done something to show it. Sure, there are times when it feels like what we're doing would suggest something more, but those things are either initiated by me, or things I've built up in my mind because of how I feel for him.

So, no. Syaoran doesn't have feelings for me. Meaning that if he's in love with someone, any hope at something more than a friendship will basically be crushed.

I let my gaze fall to my feet. "I can't tell him, Tomoyo. I'm not going to risk our friendship on the possibility that he might someday learn to return my feelings."

Across from me, Tomoyo huffs. "But isn't it worth the chance? Would you really rather spend the rest of your life regretting having never said anything? Honestly, what exactly are you afraid of? If your friendship with him is as strong as you've led me to believe, then something like this shouldn't change that."

Frustrated by her endless repetition, I lift my head and am nearly shouting as I say, "It's not going to happen, Tomoyo. Okay? Unlike you, the person I like isn't some guy who showed up one day and instantly returned my feelings, asking me out within a week of when we first met." Tomoyo and I are both surprised by my outburst. "Sorry," I mumble. "It's just that I'm scared. I've never felt like this for anyone else, and the thought of losing this feeling, of losing _him_ for any reason terrifies me."

Tomoyo sighs again, only this time it's a sigh of defeat. "I know, Sakura. I'm sorry, I shouldn't be pushing you into doing something you aren't ready for. You know that you can talk to me whenever you need to, though."

I nod. "Of course I know that, Tomoyo. You're my best friend. I love you like a sister."

A moment of panic comes when her eye's glaze over, but then she pulls me into a warm hug. "Why do you have to be so adorable, Sakura?"

Giggling, I return the gesture. "It runs in the family. Mother's side, I believe."

Pulling away, Tomoyo smiles in amusement then glances off into the crowd. "We should probably hurry up before they think we ran off."

"Ha, yeah. This way?" I point in the direction I last saw the posse.

"Sure hope so. Only one way to find out." So we head off in the direction I'm pointing and pray we'll find the others soon.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

Alright, that's it. We've been walking around for close to an hour and my stress levels are beyond the shrine gate. Ever since my talk with Sakura earlier, I've just had this really bad feeling in the pit of my stomach like something bad is going to happen.

Finally, unable to take it anymore, I fall back in attempt to find her in the back of our group with Daidouji and Eriol; however, when I reach them, Sakura is nowhere in sight.

"Daidouji, have you seen Sakura? I need to talk to her."

The girl gives me an odd look and turns around. "Isn't she-" Daidouji's amethyst eyes grow wide and her head frantically darts every which way. "Oh, no! I think she might have said something about grabbing taiyaki, but I didn't realize she had walked off." The girl's thin, pale fingers twist anxiously at her locks of hair.

"Don't tell me..." Dread fills my entire being.

Daidouji bites her lip. "I'm sorry, Li, I didn't even notice."

I blame Eriol for this. Why? Because had he not been so busy flirting with Sakura's best friend, she might not be missing right now.

"Don't apologize, it's not your fault," I reassure her. "Can you tell the others I'm going to find her? I doubt she'll find her way back on her own."

"Are you sure? Do you want me to-"

"It's fine, Daidouji. I'll call Takashi when I find her."

Daidouji hesitates for a moment before nodding. "Alright, thank you."

"Yeah. I'll be back soon." Turning around, I head towards the taiyaki stand we passed by a few minutes ago.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Wonderful. I turn my back for two seconds, and suddenly everyone is gone. Confused as to what's going on? Well, allow me to explain.

It all started when Touya decided he would make dinner, even though dad offered multiple times to take over. Of course, the meal ended up being somewhat less than edible, so I just went ahead and ate some leftover rice for dinner. Consequently, it ended up leaving me not _quite_ satisfied.

The small amount of food took its tole on me when our little group came across a nice taiyaki stand and I told Tomoyo I was going to go grab some. She was talking with Eriol at the time, so I probably should've known better than to rely on her to hear me, let alone remember that I had walked off.

Anyways, I was only at the stall for maybe a minute or two, and when I'd purchased my food and turned back to join my friends, they were all gone.

So, I am currently stuck aimlessly wandering around in search of my friends, and munching on the warm fish-shaped pocket of wonderfulness.

The overall point is that right now I'm stuck wandering around in search of my party. It's been close to ten minutes now, and I'm starting to panic a little. Stupid me didn't think to bring her phone since she was so worried about the scarf she was going to give to Syaoran. I'll admit, I'm not the best at planning.

Nope. Not this way either. Sighing, I turn around, only to nearly run straight into the group of men that I didn't even know was standing behind me. I quickly step back and mutter an apology, turning the other way once more. Much to my dismay, one of the men grabs my arm.

What the-?

"Hey." I face the man who's hand is wrapped around my arm. He stands beside two other men, all in their mid-twenties or so and looking like they just got into a fight with the way their cloths are messy and tattered. "Are you all by yourself?"

Next to him, another speaks. "Someone as pretty as you shouldn't be all alone for New Years."

The third and last chimes in, "Why not come with us and let us show you a good time?"

Even though I'm confused I know one thing for sure: there's not a chance in hell I'm going anywhere with these people. If Touya has taught me anything over the years, it's to stay away from weird old dudes who suddenly invite you to go somewhere, or who just act a little _too_ friendly to be real.

"No," I say my heart pounding against my chest. Glancing around, it's like everyone around is completely oblivious to me, the teenage girl, being abruptly grabbed by some group of men way too old and unkempt to be anyone I know. "I'm not..."1

"There you are!" A deep voice calls from behind me, followed by an arm snaking protectively around my waist and another crossing my chest and taking my shoulder, brushing the stranger's hand away. "I've been looking everywhere for you." His voice is so flirtatious that almost don't recognize it.

My breath abruptly hitches as his lips brush against the side of my neck. "Don't make me worry like that." Raising my arms, I curl my hands over the arm crossing below my collarbone. His breath sends shivers up and down my spine as I struggle not to make a sound. "Play along," he whispers in my ear, making me light-headed.

Forcing myself back to reality, I twist around and bury my face in his chest, wrapping my arms around his torso. "I'm sorry. Please don't be mad."

Syaoran puts his hand to the back of my head, holding me close. "Don't worry, I'm not mad. I could never be mad at you."

There's a tense moment, then I hear Syaoran's more malicious voice hiss out, "Can I _help_ you?" Something tells me Syaoran's idea of 'help' isn't as much helpful as harmful.

The men stutter and disperse before I can even register it. Syaoran's grip begins to loosen and he quietly tells me, "It's okay, they're gone." But, rather than pulling away, I find myself leaning even more against him and deeply inhaling his scent. "Um... Sakura?" I hum softly against him, not really listening. "They're gone. You can let go now."

Suddenly I take note of the hands resting unsurely on my shoulders. "Oh." I pull away from him as casually as I can, glancing over to where other passersby continue on, some glancing our way, noting the unusual scene before them. _So _now_ they decide to look_, I think bitterly to myself. "My bad."

"Er... It's fine." Glancing his way, I find Syaoran eyeing me.

Great, way to look like an idiot, Sakura. A very _clingy_ idiot, nonetheless.

Thankfully, he doesn't comment on the odd behavior, instead he reaches into his pocket and fishes out his phone.

Letting my eyes drift to where the men vanished, I find myself asking, "Was all that really necessary?" I can still practically feel Syaoran's lips against my neck and his arms possessively enveloping my frame.

Holding the phone to his ear, Syaoran looks at me and says in the most dead serious voice, "Yes." I raise my eyebrows, awaiting an elaboration. Looking annoyed, he goes on, sounding both defensive and frustrated. "You know what they were trying to do, right?"

I cross my arms. "Of course I know." He raises his eyebrows doubtfully, so I add, "They wanted me to go somewhere with them."

Syaoran runs a hand through his hair, sighing. "And do you know why they wanted you to go with them?"

Unsure, I hesitantly ask, "Because I was alone?"

He shakes his head in disapproval. "It's because you're an attractive teenage girl who looked lost. Your appearance does not help you in this situation." He flips his phone shut, cursing silently and redialing.

Offended, I glare at him and demand, "_Excuse_ me?"

He looks confused for a moment, then says words that leave me absolutely breathless. "Especially in the kimono, you look like a goddess straight out of a fairy tale." He looks and sounds so nonchalant that I don't think he really realizes what he's just said until he notices me gawking. "Um, I mean..."

At that very moment, the person on the other end of the phone picks up. A look of relief passes over Syaoran, and he eagerly speaks into the phone while I continue to stare, wide-eyed, and mouth most likely agape.

"Mihara! Finally, someone picks up. Tell Takashi to switch his phone to vibrate."

On the other end, Chiharu says something, and Syaoran turns away from me while he speaks.

"Yeah, I found her. She's fine, just got a bit lost... Sure, where are you?" There's another pause. "Okay, we'll meet you there." Syaoran stays silent for a while longer, then he cracks a smile and glances over at me. "Don't worry, I won't let her go wandering off again... See you guys soon." With that, he hangs up the phone and slips it back into his pocket.

"Just to be clear, I didn't wander off. I told Tomoyo where I was going, and only turned my back for a minute, then the next thing I knew, you guys were nowhere in sight."

"Uh-huh," Syaoran says, clearly not caring. "We're going to all meet up at the back of the shrine. Apparently the fireworks are starting at midnight, which is about twenty minutes away, so we need to get a move on if we want to get a good view." He starts walking and motions for me to follow.

"Right," I agree, jogging up alongside him. Syaoran glances over at me, but when I quizzically meet his gaze, he just eyes me for a moment before looking away again.

Curious, I ask, "Something on your mind?"

Syaoran frowns and then sighs almost reluctantly. "About what you asked me earlier," he begins.

As if on cue, I immediately tense up. Does he intend to tell me right here, right now? I asked him the question earlier, but to be honest, I'm not so sure I'm ready to know the answer. Regardless of what he says, I'll have to change the way I act around him. If he says, yes, I'll have to respect that he's in love with someone and give up on him. If he says no, then that means there's no way he's in love with me. So do I really want to know the answer?

"Now that you've asked, it seems only fair that I tell you... I-"

"Stop!" The word escapes my lips before I can stop it.

"Huh?"

"I don't want to know."

"What? But you asked, and I thought you-"

"I know what I said, but I changed my mind. Just... try to forget I ever asked," I plead.

Syaoran looks down at me almost desperately. It leaves me taken aback. Does he _want_ to tell me? But then he sighs in defeat and returns his attention to making our way to where the others are.

"One of these days you're going to be the death of me; you know that, right?" he asks begrudgingly without even looking at me.

I'm torn between a smart comeback and asking exactly what that's supposed to mean. Unsure how to respond, I decide just to keep quiet.

Not too long after, we reach the back of the shire where we're supposed to be meeting up, but neither Syaoran or I can spot the others.

"Where are they? Aren't _they_ the ones who should already be here?"

"You would think," he agrees, pulling out his phone again. I watch as he appears to read something on the screen, his confused frown turning into an annoyed scowl.

"What?" I demand. "Did they bail and go to karaoke without us or something?"

Syaoran snaps the phone shut again. "If only. Apparently they stopped to get _taiyaki_ of all things." He shoots me a pointed look.

"What? It's good."

"Yeah, and it also seems to be splitting up our group left and right today. You nearly got abducted, and for what?"

"An adorable fish-shaped pocket of goodness?" I smile innocently up at him and bat my eyes a few times.

He just shakes his head and starts to walk in another direction, motioning for me to follow. "Come on."

"Huh? Where are you going? Shouldn't we wait here for them?"

"Well, we could do that, or we could go to the best spot near the shrine and watch the fireworks from there. Who knows when they'll be back. I, for one, don't want to miss out on watching the new year hit just because I'm waiting for my friends to get a snack."

Glancing towards the stalls one last time, I finally give in and catch up with him. "Alright, but where do you plan to go anyways?"

The edges of Syaoran's lips tug upwards ever so slightly, rising my curiosity even more. "Just a place." His tone leaves me practically itching to know more.

"Aw, come on, Syaoran! What's with the cryptic response?"

"It's a surprise."

"Another? You said that the other day when we climbed that tree."

"I happen to know of quite a few secret spots around town."

Glaring up at him feeling annoyed, I grumble, "The fact that I've lived here my entire life and you somehow seem to know more about Tomoeda than I do is starting to bother me."

Syaoran just shrugs and keeps walking, but I catch the little smirk on his lips. Annoyed, I roll my eyes, but follow along nonetheless. The curiosity is too strong for me to protest. While we walk, though, I decide to bring up a topic in the back of my mind ever since Meiling showed up banging on Syaoran's apartment door demanding to be let in.

"Hey, Syaoran?" He glances my way, raising his eyebrows. "You know how your 'cousin'-"

"Don't make air quotes; she really is my cousin. And you can just call her Meiling."

I scowl. "I don't even know her, so I can't refer to her by her first name. Also, I can't call her Li, because _you're_ Li."

"I thought I was Syaoran."

"Well, yeah, you're Syaoran, too, but before you were Syaoran, you were Li."

Syaoran opens his mouth to speak, but I quickly cut him off. "Alright, enough with what I should call your cousin, I wanted to ask you about _your_ name."

"_My_ name?"

"Yes, _your_ name. Before she was calling you Xiao Lang."

"Oh..." Syaoran suddenly looks uncomfortable, raising a hand to run through his hair, but pausing midway through. "What about it?"

"Well, she was talking to you, right?"

"Yes," he says slowly as if unsure if he should be telling me.

"So does that mean it's also your name?"

"Er–technically, yes..."

"Is it your real name?"

"Um, it's the name that's on my birth certificate if that's what you mean."

"Hm." I lift my hand up and touch my fingers to my cheek in thought. "Xiao Lang," I say, letting the name roll off my tongue. "Li Xiao Lang."

An almost choking sound from beside me makes me look over. What I find leaves me somewhat breathless. Syaoran stands beside me, still walking, but seeming hyper-aware of each and every step while he tries to look normal by keeping his arm stiff at his sides. His face betrays any attempt at looking casual, though. I find myself gasping a little at the way his face suddenly looks several shades deeper red than it was a few seconds ago with just the cold air against it.

And then it hits me. Syaoran is embarrassed because of his name. As cruel as it is, the revelation leaves me feeling like I know a little secret about him. Plus, his reaction is absolutely priceless.

Finally, deciding to put an end to his misery–or potentially just make it that much worse–I give him a warm smile and say as gently and earnestly as I can, "It's got a nice ring to it, doesn't it? I must say, I think I like it as much as I like 'Syaoran'."

Astonished, Syaoran raises his head and looks over at me. I greet him with a smile, and say, "But you'll still always be 'Syaoran' to me."

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

"But you'll always be 'Syaoran' to me." The words, combined with Sakura's genuine smile, leave me breathless and suddenly welcoming the winter night's air. I watch her, unable to say anything, as she suddenly looks straight ahead, switching her attention to something ahead of us.

"No way," she gasps, suddenly running ahead of me down the dirt path surrounded on either side by trees. I follow slowly after her, still feeling somewhat dazed.

"This place is so surreal! How did you find out that there's a pond back here?" Sakura turns away from the silver pond bathed in moonlight to face me.

"Ms. Mizuki," I somehow manage to tell her, my brain not even thinking about it.

"Hm." Sakura nods thoughtfully, then looks directly at me. "Are you alright, Syaoran?"

"Huh?" I blink and straighten, forcing a small smile to my lips. "Yeah. Fine."

She eyes me doubtfully, but doesn't press. I don't know what I would tell her even if she did. Something about the way she told me I'll always be 'Syaoran' to her has left me totally out of it. For some reason, all I want to do is go up behind her and wrap my arms around her, nuzzling my face into the side of her neck. The urge is even worse than usual. Every single part of my body wants to be nearer to her. As if she's a magnet trying to pull me in.

Trying not to let the urge to hold her take me over, I step forward slowly until I'm standing beside her at the end of the small wooden dock. Now side-by-side, we face the lake together and listen to the sound of the crickets and people enjoying the festival off in the distance. When Sakura eventually speaks, it's almost so soft that I don't hear it.

"Hey, Syaoran?"

I glance over at her to find her still watching the lake, but now her lids are lower and something about her seems sadder than usual.

"Sakura?"

From the corner of my eye, I see her intertwining her fingers. I try not to let my eyes wander as she catches her bottom lip between her teeth and briefly closes her eyes.

"After graduation," she says slowly, "what will become of us?"

The question leaves me stunned. It's so out of the blue that I find myself not knowing how to respond. "What do you mean?"

This time, she folds her arms across her body as is she's cold then goes on. "After we graduate, you have to return to Hong Kong. When that happens, what are we going to do?"

My heart tightens at her words. I've been trying not to think too heavily on the matter myself. It's true that after graduation I'm supposed to return to my birthplace in order to finish my schooling at a University in Hong Kong, but it's always felt so far away that I didn't give it too much thought. Now that I'm standing here on a small pond in Japan with the girl I love beside me as we await the new year, the time has never felt nearer.

Looking down, I tell her the only thing I can: the truth. "I don't know, Sakura."

She shifts slightly, finally lifting her gaze to look at me, but now I'm the one unable to look at her. "It's not like we'll just be able to call each other up on the phone and make plans to meet up every few weeks."

"I know," I say quietly.

"And even if we manage to set aside some time to see each other on the holidays, how long will that really last?"

"Sakura..."

"A few years from now you'll probably be taking over your family's business in Hong Kong, and I'll either still be working in the same little café, or trying to find a job somewhere that doesn't require any sort of college education."

The way she says it finally lifts my head up. "Don't say that, Sakura."

"Let's face it, Syaoran, we both know I'm right." My facial muscles tense until I feel the desperate need to reach out to her. "We're from two completely different backgrounds. If you hadn't come to Tomoeda, we would never have met."

I find myself cringing at the thought of never having so much as met Sakura. She's become such a big part of my life that the thought of her not being in it seems impossible.

"No matter how I look at it, there's only one way I can see us ending up." She drops her arms and hangs her head. Her eyes squeeze shut and she sounds almost pleading as she whispers, "I don't want us to become strangers."

Alarmed, I stagger back like I've been struck. Then, as if trying to change the outcome she has predicted, I find myself abruptly stepping forward and protesting. "That will never happen, Sakura! It can't."

She lifts her head and meets my eyes. I find myself looking at exhaustion and surrender. "I'm sorry, Syaoran. I shouldn't be starting the new year off with such a dreary topic, it's just that the thought keeps on looming in the back of my mind."

Sighing, I tell her, "It's fine. Just... please don't think like that. You have no idea how much it scares me when you say those sorts of things."

An understanding and apologetic look passes over her face. "I know. I'm sorry for worrying you so much, it's just that I'm afraid if I don't tell you, you won't realize it and it really _will_ happen."

"Sakura." I smile softly at her. "You don't need to worry about that ever happening, alright?"

She starts to protest. "But-"

"It'll never happen, Sakura. I won't let it. I promise you that I will _never_ let that happen."

Sakura's brows pull together. "How can you promise something like that?"

I raise my voice as if speaking louder will help her to understand. "Because!" Somewhere off in the distance, there's a familiar hissing, but I'm too caught up in the moment to give it any mind. A sudden wave of courage brought on by my need to make her understand washes over me. "I... Sakura, I-"

_Boom_!

A distant explosion pulls both our attention from each other. For a moment, all I can do is stare up at the falling sparks, too stunned to do anything, but then Sakura's reaction pulls me back down to Earth.

"Wha!" I look over in time to see her excitedly craning her neck to gaze up at the sky.

_Boom_!

All around us the landscape is coated in an array of colors, but I find myself transfixed on the way that with each loud, echoing _boom_, Sakura's eyes twinkle brighter than I've ever seen them before.

"They're beautiful," she says wistfully. My mind doesn't register seem to want to register what she's said as what she means by it.

"Yeah," I agree without a thought, my eyes never once swaying from the sight of the celestial being standing less then two feet from me. "Beautiful." My voice comes out as a whisper, but Sakura seems to hear me, slowly turning her head to meet my gaze. The frontal view of her is no less hypnotizing than her profile. If anything, I find the tips of my fingers itching to reach out and caress her features. In a moment of astonishment, her lips part slightly, but no words pass them.

And then it happens.

One minute I'm admiring the girl before me as fireworks burst into light off in the distance, then I'm leaning down, one arm somehow claiming Sakura's waist and pulling her close while the other reaches up, fingers grazing past her cheek, and embedding themselves in her soft, auburn locks.

In the short amount of time before I do anything else, I watch Sakura's eyes widen in disbelief. She doesn't move to push me away, nor does she show any signs of encouragement. All she does is let her eyes flick between the two of mine, trying to read my expression.

Then, hair still between my fingers, I pull her up with minimal force and finally put an end to the question that's kept me up countless nights pondering over. To no surprise, her lips are just as soft and smooth as I guessed they would be. The sensation, on the other hand, is nowhere near anything I could've imagined, and, not caring about the consequences, I finally allow myself to simply kiss her the way I've longed to for years.

As I hold her, three words pass through my mind. They cry out, desperate to be heard, and more than anything, longing to be returned. _I love you!_

I pull away after a moment, a sigh escaping me. Slowly lifting my lids, I leave an inch to separate Sakura's face from mine. The second our eyes meet, though, I jerk away, startled. In front of me, Sakura stares up, her eyes wide and glazed over. Her cheeks are flushed and her lips are a shade darker than usual.

For the longest moment, we both just stand there, neither moving, maybe not even breathing. And then the moment is over.

A slight gasp from farther down the path sends my head flying in that direction, fearful of what I might find. A mixture of relief and dread runs through me when I lock eyes with amethyst orbs.

Standing at the edge of the thick coverage of trees, eyes the size of platters, is none other than Tomoyo Daidouji. A few feet behind her, Eriol stands watching the events unfold without appearing surprised or judgmental.

At that moment I realize I'm still holding Sakura, and without meeting her gaze again, I drop my ams to my side. "Happy New Year." The words come out as a quiet jumble. I don't wait around to see their effect, though. I all but run down the path towards the shrine. In the back of my mind, I can hear a voice taunting me, calling me a coward, but I'm too far gone to listen at that point.

Daidouji lifts her hand slightly as I pass, but doesn't say anything until I'm a fair amount farther down the path. "Li!" she calls, almost tentatively.

I only pause long enough to look over my shoulder and mumble back, not meeting her gaze, "Make sure she gets home safely for me, Daidouji." And before she can stop me, I let myself disappear into the umbrage.

After swiftly maneuvering far away from the people and the celebration, I fall against the side of the nearest building I come across. Exhausted, I let myself slide down the wall until I land heavily on the pavement.

"Damn it," I curse, bringing my hands up and covering my face. What am I _doing_? I just kissed Sakura. With no consent whatsoever, I stole a kiss from her. What kind of a friend _does_ that?

_The kind that wants something more_, a voice in the back of my mind tells me.

Shaking my head and shoving the thought from my mind, I think about Sakura. Kind and innocent Sakura. What's she thinking right now? Is she confused? Is she angry? What will she think of me from here on out? And, most importantly, why was she looking at me like that? As if I shattered some sort of illusion she spent years weaving, or told her that everything she thought she knew was a lie.

"Sakura..." I lift my head, letting it rest against the wall behind me. In the distance, fireworks continue to rain down from the star-filled sky. Closing my eyes, I whisper, knowing she can't hear me, two words. "Forgive me."

And I'm left wondering...

_What happens from here on?_

* * *

**Muahahahaha! Oh, how I do love this chapter. Honestly, it's my favorite. I honestly wasn't planning to have the you-know-what *nudge, nudge; wink, wink* this early on, but one night I was super tired, and it just happened. I think I work best in a half-asleep state.**

**Info on next chapter: It has already been started, but still has a lot of gaps in it. It's likely to be another long one. NOT THIS LONG, THOUGH! *Insert dread-face emoticon* Never again, Cupcake. Never. Again.**

**Okay, so if you read this, please, please, please comment and let me know what you thought. This chapter is kind of a big deal, so I really need feedback. And yes, NEED. I think I'll curl up into a ball and mope if nobody has anything to say. Kidding again... But for real, comment, 'kay? (And please don't hate me for saying 'kay)**

**Alright, goodbyyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeee!**


	28. The Confession

**Last Update: January 17, 2015**

**(I'll leave the author's notes for now since it's so close to when I originally posted.)**

**Finally! And right before the end of the day, too. No matter what you celebrate, just think of it as my end-of-year gift to all of you... Even though it's super overdue. Sorry 'bout that. Life happens. Plus, I've been working on 29 and the chapters that follow it.**

**Anyways, happy holidays, you guys. And since there's too few days for me to even hope to update within the amount of time until then: Happy New Years!**

**Note: I only half-edited this chapter, so if something isn't looking right, it's probably just because I accidentlay typed it funky the first time around and never caught it. If you didn't already know, I'm the only person who edits these (In other words: no beta). Not the best system but I've managed so far. If you see a bunch of mistakes, nag me about it, and I'll go fix them. Or at least try to.**

**Anyways, I've gotta go. After all, it is the 25th, so I've got stuff to do. Hope you all enjoy the chapter!**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Boom_!_

_ At the sound of the explosion, I raise my head to the sky. Off in the distance, against a million stars, streams of light are cast in all directions in different shapes and sizes. Each one releases a boom that is heard miles around._

_ My mind draws forth that day in the art room with Syaoran when he compared my painting to fireworks. The same painting that I adulterated during my episode of anger and frustration. Now, staring up at the real thing, I see that they're far too bright to ever be smothered by a single person's emotions._

_ "They're beautiful." The words come out as a sigh of admiration. I find myself wanting reach out and pluck one from the sky._

_ The sound of Syaoran's voice pulls me back down to earth. "Yeah," he says so softly that I almost don't hear him. Somehow, something tells me he doesn't mean the fireworks. "Beautiful." The word sends my heart fluttering._

_ Something has changed. All of a sudden we aren't just two friends standing next to each other and watching the New Year begin with the sound of fireworks echoing around us._

_ Feeling the atmosphere change, I slowly turn my head to the side and am both puzzled and flustered to find Syaoran's piercing amber eyes already on me. He's different, though. The way he looks at me isn't like the way he was just looking at me a few minutes ago, or even the way he looks at me when we're laughing and just enjoying one another's presence. No, it's not like anything I can ever recall, yet it feels familiar in a way. This is far more affectionate than I've seen from Syaoran. It's almost... longing._

_ Then, before I know what's happening, there's an arm around my waist, and I have no choice but to allow my feet to clumsily shuffle forward as Syaoran pulls me towards him._

_ I open my mouth to ask or say something, but nothing comes out. My body becomes so tense, it's as if I've turned to stone._

_ There's a tiny part of me that knows what's coming next, but after years and years of telling myself it would never happen, the rest of me seems to reject the possibility._

_ But then it happens. Syaoran's hand reaches up and before I can fully process that his hand has somehow made its way to the back of my neck, I find myself being guided upwards. In the next second, time seems to slow and then finally come to a screeching halt as lips–_Syaoran's_ lips–meet mine._

_ It all happens so fast that I'm not even sure whether to believe it's really happening or not. But it feels real. Everything from the human touch, to the Earth's harsh elements. The winter breeze seems to blow right through me, yet at the same time, my entire body feels as if it's being scorched. There's definitely a sturdy arm gripping me in place so that I can't move or fall. Definitely a hand curled around the inward curve of my waist, fingers pressed into my skin, but not to the point that it's painful. And the hand at the back of my neck, surely the tingles it's sending down my spine aren't just my imagination. But what's really undeniable is the the warm lips against my own. The sensation is nowhere near anything I could've envisioned._

_ This is _real_. This is actually happening. It's not just another one of my teenage day-dreams. Right here at a small pond behind Tsukimine Shrine, and right now, mere seconds after the New Year hit._

_ And as I realize that, all I want to do is kiss him back. I want to wrap my arms around his neck and never let him go. But my body won't move, and before I know it, he's pulling away. It's like I'm frozen in time, unable to do anything but gawk at him. I just watch, confused and bewildered, while his eyes slowly open, revealing dilated pupils surrounded by brilliant pools of amber._

_ For the briefest moment, all I can see in those eyes is content, but then he blinks and jerks away from me as if startled. And we just stand there, staring at each other, neither knowing what to say or do._

_ One word–one _question_–echoes through my mind, daunting and relentless._

Why? If he doesn't love me... then why?

* * *

My eyes snap open. Looking around, I find myself laying in my own bed in my own room, and fall back onto the pillows. Staring up at the ceiling, I raise my fingers to lightly touch my lips. It's been over forty-eight hours since Syaoran stole my first kiss without a single word of explanation, yet my lips are still tingling. I've spent the past two days wandering the house and wondering what to do next. Touya raises his eyebrows at me whenever I pass by, but keeps quiet. Good thing, too, because if he knew what happened, he'd probably try to murder Syaoran. As for my dad, he's given me a few worried looks, but when he tries to ask, I quickly redirect his attention.

The entire situation is just getting worse and worse as time passes. Normally we wouldn't be going back to school until after the weekend, but because of the school trip, third years will be going back in just a few days. It's absolutely terrifying me. I can't stop worrying about what I'll say to him. Or what he'll say to me. I _need_ to talk to him, but I don't know what I would say.

"Syaoran... Why does everything you do make me so confused?"

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

_ "Syaoran-kun."_

_ "Syaoran-kun?"_

_ "Syaoran-kun!"_

_ "Is something the matter, Syaoran?"_

_ "Dad took mom to the hospital today... Something's really wrong. I'm scared, Syaoran. I don't know why, but I have this really bad feeling."_

_ "They said it's Leukemia... She's still at the hospital; they're running tests on her... Leukemia. My mom has Leukemia. She has cancer."_

_ "Thank you, Syaoran. I'm glad you're here. I don't know what I would do if you weren't."_

_ "You idiot! How could you? You were just going to leave without saying so much as goodbye? I thought we were friends!"_

_ "You broke my heart that day, Syaoran! I loved you, and you broke my heart!"_

_ "I want to make one thing perfectly clear... I don't still feel the same way I did back then."_

_ "There's nothing you can do about it now. You missed your chance to do anything a long time ago. You can't turn back time, Li."_

* * *

"Sakura!" I shoot up in bed, panting and covered in a cold sweat.

Sakura's words echo through my mind until I feel like I'm going to be sick. It's frustrating, but I've been having these dreams for about a week now. Ever since New Years, to be exact. I'll wake up, small beads of perspiration on my forehead and struggling for air. At first I didn't think too hard about it, but then it kept happening. As devastating as is sounds, I think it's because in the back of my mind, I know Sakura isn't ready to return the feelings I have for her, and maybe never will be. I've hurt her a lot, and she's suffered because of it. We both have.

The situation is absolutely infuriating. Every time I try to relax, something in my room will remind me of her. The green walls, that always manage to remind me of her eyes, even though the shade isn't quite right. The pink stuffed bear sitting on top of my desk on the opposite side of the room. Even laying in my own bed, I recall the time I held her until she fell asleep.

Shoving the sheets aside, I trudge to the bathroom and splash my face with cold water a few times, letting the excess droplets fall off the end of my nose while I watch the faucet continue to spew water.

_ I loved you, and you broke my heart._

With a harsh slap, the faucet turns off. I lean against the counter and allow Sakura's words to invade my mind.

_ You can't turn back time._

With a sigh, I lift my head to examine my reflection. I'm greeted by the face of a zombie. Dark circles rim my eyes, and my hair looks even more tussled than usual.

She's right; I can't turn back time. She'll probably never love me again because I already broke her heart one time around. Unknowingly, sure, but it doesn't change the fact that I betrayed her trust.

Exhausted, I push away from the counter and haul myself back to bed. If I keep getting the same amount of sleep I've been getting, I'll probably be walking around eating human brains by the end of the week.

* * *

**Meiling's POV**

"Alright, this is starting to creep me out. Is he always this... moody?"

From the corner of my eye, I can see the man beside me's face crinkle. "Sometimes the young master gets into a mood, but as of late, he's been much more cheerful."

"Do you think something happened?"

"I hope not. The change occurred shortly after one of Ms. Sakura's visits."

"What?" I demand, shifting my attention away from the moody teen in the other room who I've been spying on from around a corner at the end of the hall. "She's been here before? When? How many times? What did she _do_?"

Wei looks slightly taken aback. "My, my, young miss." He stands up straighter. "You don't seem too fond of Sakura-sama."

"That's because I'm _not_. I can't believe that after all of this time and after all the crap she put him through, he's allowing her to be his friend again." I fold my arms over my chest.

"Meiling-sama..." Wei sighs. "Those two should never have been separated in the first place. Sakura-sama is not to blame, and nor is Syaoran-sama."

"Right." I roll my eyes and lean back against the wall, the boy in the other room no longer visible.

In front of me, Wei frowns and gives me an almost saddened look. "Although you may not understand why, you must know that those two have been through much. Even if they won't say it aloud, they're very much in love."

"Hmph." I fold my arms and tun away, avoiding his gaze. It's always been one of my flaws: the inability to admit when I'm wrong.

I've known Syaoran my entire life, so I can guess what's going on. Something must have happened with the Kinomoto girl when they went out on New Years. He came back an hour or two past midnight, and didn't even say anything to Wei and I when he came in, just slipped silently by. I probably wouldn't have even known he'd come in had I not spotted him on my way from the bathroom. And, contrary to his threatening promise before he left with Kinomoto, he hasn't so much as mentioned my behavior towards his so-called 'friend'.

He's kidding himself if he thinks that's all she wants to be to him. Or, as much as I hate to admit it, all he, himself wants to be to her.

They're infatuated with each other. _Love_, though, seems a bit extreme.

Even if what Wei says is true and they are in love with each other, I've only ever seen Syaoran in pain because of that girl. I know it's not my place to object, but I don't think she's good for him.

My thoughts are interrupted by the doorbell. "So help me, if it's her..." I shut my mouth when I see the look Wei is giving me.

Thankfully, when I open the door, it's not the green-eyed she-devil I'm faced with. Instead, I find wide violet eyes staring back at me.

"Can I help you?" Wow. I need to work on my people skills, because even I can tell that sounded harsh.

"Um..." The girl's eyebrows furrow, and she leans back a bit to reread the number above the doorbell. "This is he Li residence, correct?"

"It is. I'm Li Meiling. Just visiting."

"Oh!" Understanding registers in the girls eyes, and she visibly relaxes. "That's good, I'm actually looking for the other Li. Li Syaoran. I'm-"

"Daidouji." Syaoran stands behind me looking utterly shocked. "What are you doing here?" he asks, composing himself until his surprise turns to what I can only identify as shame. Not at the girl beyond the threshold, somehow it seems more directed at himself. Why, though, is beyond me.

"I thought maybe we should talk. About..." She looks at me briefly. "The other day."

"Of course," Syaoran says, not sounding resentful or frustrated, instead clearly understanding and accepting Daidouji's explanation. "Do you mind if we go somewhere else to talk, though?"

"Not at all. Over a cup of hot chocolate?"

Any other time, I would probably fall over from shock if Syaoran's eyes didn't light up at the mention of his favorite sweet, but now it just seems natural for him to nod in opinion-less agreement.

"I'll be back in an hour or so, Meiling. If Wei asks, tell him I have something I need to take care of and I'll be back soon."

I nod. After he's finished slipping on his shoes and coat and grabbing his wallet, Syaoran gives me a small goodbye and slips out the door.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

"You knew, didn't you?" In the quaint little coffee shop, my voice seems to travel around the entire inside of the building for everyone to hear. "About Sakura. You knew that I was in love with her."

Daidouji smiles slightly and shakes her head as she sets down her cup. "No, I know that you _are_ in love with her, and that you have been ever since we were kids."

"Geez." I rest my elbows on the table and run my fingers through my hair. "Is it really that obvious?" I ask, looking over at her.

Daidouji giggles. "I've known the two of you since we were all just little kids. Even then it was clear how you two felt for each other. If you could've seen the way you looked at her..." Daidouji pauses only for a moment, but a heavy weight seems to fall as she says, "How she looked at you."

Stiffened by the memory, I force out, "She told me she used to be in love with me." I smile almost bitterly. "But you knew that, too, didn't you?"

She doesn't acknowledge that I've lashed out, keeping her voice steady and unwavering. "She was. So much so that I'm surprised you didn't realize it yourself. Although, what Sakura never realized was that her feelings were mutual. The both of you are so terribly dense." I can almost feel her smiling fondly. "Like two peas in a pod."

"In our case it doesn't make for such a great combo, though."

"Maybe." Not expecting her easy agreement, I lift my head again. She's just sitting there, looking down at me with a small smile playing at her lips as if I'm a child she's fondly guiding through life. "But the two of you aren't just any other couple. Take it from the third party observer: there's something special between both of you. She relies on you, Li, and don't even pretend you don't do the same."

I look away again, trying to hide my embarrassment. Daidouji is good at reading people, that much I've known for a while, but I never realized to just what extent her ability to read people reached. "But look at what became of us the last time that bond was tested. Seven years. I lost seven _years_ with her all because of one stupid mistake."

"Li." Daidouji reaches across the table and wraps her hand around my wrist in a friendly gesture. Looking me dead in the eyes, she says, "What happened all those years ago to split you two apart wasn't because you weren't close enough to each other. It was because you were _too_ close. Sakura has always been terrified of heartbreak and rejection, so she shut herself in."

"Then what do you propose I do?"

"Tell her, Li. Don't just sweep her off her feet and kiss her, you need to _tell_ her. Anything else is going to confuse her. She's confused right now." Daidouji shakes her head briefly as if frustrated. "The girl simply refuses to see things for what they are. If you don't open your heart to her and tell her straight out you are in _love_ with her, then she's always going to wonder, and she's never going to have anything but doubt."

Exasperated, I let out a dry laugh and raise my head to the unusually blue sky on the other side of the window. "I picked one hell of a girl to fall in love with, didn't I?"

Amused, she grins and leans back in the booth, lifting her cup to her lips and talking a sip. "That you did, but then again, this _is_ Sakura we're talking about. She can be a handful at times-"

"But she's totally worth it," I finish. And suddenly it's like a weight has been lifted. All the stress from endless nights of being plagued with nightmares is gone. Yet I still find myself having to ask one last question to my seemingly omniscient violet-haired friend. Even if I'm going to tell Sakura either way, I still have to ask. "Do you think she'll ever accept me?"

Daidouji's lifts her eyes to gaze at me, silently taking in my posture, then, very gently, she says, "Li, I think she already has."

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

He's there when I leave the cafe just over a week after the incident. I walk out and nearly have a heart attack when I see him standing there, leaning against the side of the building. Syaoran, on the other hand, simply tuns his head at the sound of the door.

"Hey," he says, a hint of hesitation evident in his voice.

"Hi," I manage to reply, my voice small and unsure.

He studies me. "We need to talk."

Looking down, I mutter, "I know."

I lift my gaze enough to watch him heave a long exhale. The puffs of his hot breath disperse into the chilling winter air around him.

"Does the park work for you?"

I nod meekly and follow along when he pushes off the wall and takes the lead. We walk in silence, but every so often, I find myself anxiously glancing in his direction. A million questions race through my mind.

What is he thinking right now? Why did he come meet me after work? Is it serious? Should I be worried? Is he finally going to tell me what happened the other day?

_Yes_, I decide. There's no other reason, right? Even if there were, we couldn't go on much longer not talking about it. We can't pretend it didn't happen, and I don't want to. Because, in truth, when he kissed me, it sparked something inside me. An idea. A dangerous possibility. I've spent every moment since that time thinking about all the possible reasons for it, but in the end, they all ultimately lead back to one conclusion.

Syaoran wanted to. He did it of his own free will. It's not as if anyone told him to. I was too stunned to so much as move after he took me by the waist.

Regardless of whether it was an impulse that just suddenly came over him or if it's something he's wanted to do for a while, he still did it. Part of my brain keeps on arguing that maybe if it was just a sudden impulse, he doesn't have feelings for me, but then I think of the way he looked at me. Right before he leaned in, he paused to just stop and look at me. In that moment, I'm almost certain he knew what he was about to do. He didn't change his mind, realizing what he was doing, he went on with it.

I'm abruptly pulled from my thoughts by hands on my shoulders, steering me in another direction. I blink and look up, only to find myself nearly having run straight into the fencing that blocks off the sides of a small bridge by the park.

"You should really be more careful." I tense slightly, but relax when the hands on my shoulders vanish.

"Sorry," I mutter. "I wasn't paying attention."

"It's fine. Come on, we're almost there." He walks past me once more.

I just watch him at first, but when I'm finally unable to take it anymore, I call out to him. "Syaoran?"

He pauses and it takes a moment for him to turn around and face me. "What is it?"

Again, I hesitate, unsure if I should ask or wait until we reach the park to see what he has to say, but, eventually, I find myself unable to take it anymore. "Is this… Is it about what happened on New Years?"

Syaoran doesn't look surprised by my question in the slightest. "Yes," he says. "It is."

Looking down again, I step forward to cross the bridge and meet him on the other side, but stop when I see his hand extend and rest on the fencing as he, too, steps back onto the bridge.

In an instance, I look up and silently meet his gaze. His expression makes me short of breath. He looks almost sad, but, at the same time, needing to say something. After a long silence, he speaks. "You want to ask, don't you?"

Knowing exactly what he means, I cast my gaze aside.

"You don't need to be coy about it. I'll answer anything you want to know. And, if you don't ask, there's something I need to tell you once you're done." He says it so earnestly, that I have no choice but to look at him again.

Before I can fully think the question through, my lips are moving to form the words. "Why did you do it?"

Leaning farther against the post, he turns his head to the side and meets my gaze. I jump a little, and find myself looking down at my feet, unable to look directly into his eyes. I wait anxiously for him to say something, shifting my weight from one foot to the other.

"You really are hopeless."

My attention snaps upward to find a fond smile and soft eyes adorning Syaoran's features.

"Do you remember what it was like before your mom was ever diagnosed with cancer? Back when we were just getting to know each other?"

Puzzled, I nod slowly.

"I thought you were crazy when we first met. You were always so chipper and bubbly that I thought it must be fake." He looks away, off to the running water below us. "So I figured that if I just ignored you for long enough, you'd go away." I hear him chuckle as he says, "Of course, that plan backfired."

I smile slightly at the memory, but frown and begin, "Syaoran…"

"I know. After a while, though, you started to grow on me more and more." His fists clench and unclench. "I just didn't realize how much until it was too late."

Suddenly everything feels surreal. The world seems to spin as my brain tries to make sense of his words.

"I don't know what you're thinking, Sakura. For all I know, you've already figured out what I want to say," he pauses, "but either way, I need to tell you, so listen, alright?"

He watches me expectantly, but I can't move. Every part of my body feels like it's on fire. My breaths are short and shallow, while my heart is beating like the wings of a butterfly.

"Sakura," he calls gently, awaiting my reply. As he fully turns to face me, I force myself to look down. Even as he approaches me, I don't look up.

"Please, look at me." He stops in front of me, and reaches out to lift my chin.

Reluctantly, I look up to meet his gaze. Drowning in the pool of amber, so close and so caring, I suddenly feel my body becoming weak. For the briefest moment, I recall back to the events of a few days ago. The way he looked at me. The way he leaned forward. The way he kissed me. That moment when I was both the most confused and content person in the world.

Once I've met his gaze, I feel his fingers vanish from against my skin.

"This is important, okay?"

A meek nod is the best response I can manage.

At first Syaoran doesn't say anything. He just stands there, looking at me so intensely that I almost give in to my body's pleas and pass out right there. It feels like forever before he finally looks down and reaches out to take my hands in his. I let him carry all of their weight as he pulls our hands up between us. I let out a strangled gasp as his lashes fall and he plants a single lingering kiss on the knuckles of my left hand. The action sends the most welcoming jolt of electricity through my body that I've ever felt. When he looks back up again, his eyes seem to possess more of the beautiful molten red than ever before. And then he says the three words that are racing through my mind. The three words that every girl dreams of hearing.

"I love you."

Yes, I find myself silently agreeing, I do love him. I love him more than I've ever loved anyone else.

It takes me a good while to finally realize that the words didn't come from my imagination. Then it takes another moment after that for me to realize that the boy in front of me is the one who spoke them. But when I do stumble upon the realization, I don't question it in the slightest, for fear that if I think or move, the illusion before me will shatter, and I'll wake up in my bedroom, never having been kissed, and never having heard the one thing I've always wished Syaoran would tell me.

"You love me," I mime.

In front of me, Syaoran nods, his beautiful chestnut locks falling farther around his face. "Yes, Sakura. I love you. And not just as a friend." He looks at my hands in his again, and squeezes them softly. "I've been in love with you for a while now, Sakura." He scoffs, and adds, "Well, more like a really, really long while." He looks up at me again, this time his face serious and apologetic. "The other day... All those things you were saying about us drifting apart and never having met, they're things I never want to have to think about, because they terrify me. The thought of you not being in my life is..." The blood circulating through my hands is cut off as Syaoran's grip tightens. "It's too painful for me to stand." His grip loosens a bit, and he gently strokes the back of my hand with his thumb. "So when you asked me how I could promise not to let something like that ever happen, my only thought was to tell you. I almost did, but then the fireworks went off, and–as you know–I never finished telling you."

As he explains, I have to wonder if he's talking about the same events I'm thinking of. Did Syaoran really try to tell me he was in love with me? I could tell what I was saying was having an effect him, but I never realized to just what extent.

At the same time, little thoughts of doubt linger in the corners of my mind. Does he really mean everything he's saying? More than anything I want to say yes, and not question it. He seems sincere, but if he's really loved me for a 'long while' as he puts it, then why would he have never told me?

It's not as if I don't believe him, but 1it all just seems too good to be true. I want to let myself drown in his words and throw my arms around him. It's like when he kissed me. I want to respond and tell him I feel the same way, but everything feels so surreal. My brain is too busy trying to process all of this that it doesn't have the ability to tell my body what to do or say, so I'm forced to stand and watch as Syaoran continues to pour out his heart in front of me. I've never felt as out of control as this moment. Listening to the one I love most tell me that he feels the same way, and not being able to tell him I feel the same. That I've always felt the same. And that right now, it feels like I always will.

"At the time, I kept on thinking over and over again that, 'Hey, this is the girl I'm in love with.' And then I was leaning forward... and I didn't try to stop myself."

Syaoran reaches down and releases my hands. He stares off into the space between us, and when he looks up again, I suddenly feel exposed without his grip to protect me.

"I'm sorry, Sakura. For putting you through all of this. For springing this all on you at once. Most of all, though, I'm sorry it took me so long to tell you. After how I hurt you all those years ago, I don't expect you to ever let me in again. But... After everything that has happened, you deserve to know. Everything I do... Everything I have done... It's all because I love you."

He lets the words settle for a moment, then a playful grin spreads across his face, and he rests his hand atop my head. "Anyways, enough of the sappy stuff. It's getting late, so I should probably keep my promise and get you home." His hand vanishes from my head, and I stand silently as he turns around and starts across the bridge once more.

Watching his retreating back, I finally manage to find my voice. "Syaoran!" He turns around and when he's looking at me again, I realize that I don't know what to say. "Um, I... I just..."

"Sakura," he calls softly. I jump a little at my name. "Don't push yourself. You don't need to say anything now if you don't want to. No matter what, I'll always be your friend, so don't say anything unless it's from you." Syaoran leaves a moment of silence before saying in a less serious voice, "Now, seriously, we should get going. Come on." He motions for me to follow, and at that very moment, I finally manage to pry my feet from the bridge.

A short time later, when we've already passed the park, I somehow manage to speak. "Thank you, Syaoran." The words are small, and they don't truly portray just how much everything he's just said has moved me, but they're some of the most sincere words I've ever spoken. The only way I know that he's heard me is that he looks over at me and smiles softly before turning forward again.

"Anything for you, Sakura."

_Anything for you._

The words baffle me. For some reason, they leave me completely mystified. Anything for me? Syaoran will do anything for me. He'll wait for me when I need time. He'll comfort me when I feel like the entire world is crumbling around me. He'll watch over me when I'm sick. When I need a friend, he'll be there to make me laugh. And if I just need someone to talk to, he'll still be at my side listening to my every word.

But that's not quite right. He_ will_? Who am I kidding? He _is_. Syaoran is always there when I need him, no matter what for. He's done more for me in the past two months than I could've asked for in all my years of knowing him.

As I realize this, I find my gaze drifting to him, only this time I'm not looking at his physical features. While it's impossible, I suddenly feel as if I'm staring at a completely different person. We walk in silence, but the entire time, I replay different faces I've seen Syaoran make, and all of the different emotions he's held in those beautiful amber eyes of his. I recall all of the things he's ever done for me, and then I think back to the words he's just said. I know it's true. Everything.

And I love him even more because of it.

* * *

**(Note: This isn't the last chapter)**

**Yay. I think the end is cute. Bias? Psht, naw. Not at all. I–the person who wrote it to the best of her ability–can look at this story from a completely and totally objective standpoint.**

**I can be a very sarcastic person, in case you were wondering. Isn't getting to know little quirks about the author just the best?**

**...Alright, that's enough out of me.**

**So I guess I'll see you all whenever I see you all. Hopefully not too far from now. I'm not doing anything (except maybe video games) next week, so hopefully I manage to stay focused and get that next chapter finished up. Cross your fingers and review. Believe me, it helps. Seriously, I check the number of reviews at least once a day. Sometimes more depending on how bored I am, and how long it's been since the chapter was posted. It's sitting at 136 right now. I've read all of them, just for the record. Even though I don't tell you guys, I do. Ask me a serious question, and I'll give you a serious answer. Probably through PM, though.**

**Enough of that. I seriously have stuff to do. Like eat dinner. So, happy holidays and New Years to all of you wonderful people, and I will see you–hopefully–soon.**


	29. Into the Abyss

**Hey, you guys. Been a while, hasn't it? Wasn't supposed to be, but then January happened, and everything went all crazy. It was a very long month with ups and downs. Mostly downs.**

**I've become fan of the Hobbit and Lord of the Rings, though. It makes me so emotional that I really shouldn't tell you about it. So I won't.**

**There are things about the story I've been meaning to tell you all. Some of you thought chapter 28 was the last chapter, but I want to let you all know that wasn't (clearly, or you wouldn't be reading this). The story is, however, almost over. There will be at least 5 more chapters at this point. Unless, of course, they become so long that I have to split them in two like I did with this one.**

**To clarify, this chapter was originally much longer, but I decided to leave you guys with a cliffhanger in order to keep a good chapter length.**

**Also, I should mention that this chapter isn't my best writing. The entire thing is in Sakura's POV, and it's kind of rushed. Next chapter is the one I really think you'll all enjoy, but it's not ready. I really just need to write the whole thing and then tweak it, but I'm nit-picky, so it's taking forever.**

**Reminder: Last chapter ended with Syaoran confessing his feelings to Sakura. That basically explains everything going on in the chapter.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

An infinite world of darkness. There is no up or down. Gravity is a foreign concept, not known here. This is a place of struggle and hardship. Each time I try to pull myself up, it's just to get shoved right back down again.

I've known this place. I spent years of my life in it. Struggling. Trying to find an escape route. There isn't one, though. At least not this time.

I can feel myself slowly fading away. Everything that used to hurt is turning numb.

I know what it means.

I know I should keep fighting it... But I can't. I can't fight it. My body refuses to listen to what my brain is telling it to do. And all I want to do is let go and fall.

Just let go.

Everything is going to be alright.

Just let go.

So I do. I let go, knowing full well that everything is _not _going to be alright.

* * *

_12 hours earlier_

* * *

"29… 30… 31… Alright, that's everyone for me." Terada flips down the papers on his clipboard and brings it to his side. He continues speaking directly to us. "Now, due to the slight," he pauses to glance over at his fellow colleagues with a distasteful glint in his eyes, "miscommunication between us teachers, the bunks got all mixed up, and we've decided to allow all of you pick out who you'll be bunking with, so get in groups of six. Class doesn't matter this time, so if you're best friend is in another class, you can still share the same cabin, but… But they aren't listening anymore. Mizuki-san, will you record the arrangements of the girls? I can't seem to find Subaru-san anywhere, otherwise I would just ask her, but since you're here, do you mind?"

Beside Mr. Terada, Ms. Mizuki nods and indifferently takes the clipboard from our homeroom teacher.

Only half paying attention to everything, I follow quietly behind Tomoyo as she leads us towards the rest of our group of friends. When she reaches back and takes my hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze, I smile weakly and continue to make my way through the crowd of seniors.

"There are three bunks in each cabin, so we're going to have one empty bed. Sensei might have to put someone else in the room with us if they don't have any extra spots," Tomoyo explains as we go. "Hopefully they won't need to, but even if they do, it's just one night. Not too bad."

"Yeah…"

I pretend not to notice Tomoyo's saddened expression. I know she's worried about me, but I'm not ready to talk about it all yet. I'm still trying to work out what I should do about it all. About _Syaoran_.

"He~y!" Chiharu excitedly races up to meet us. "That bus ride was a total drag. You're so lucky you two weren't put on the same bus as us. The entire way, Hiiragizawa and Takashi just kept on going on and on about how the log cabin came to existence. I thought I was going to die." Her braids swaying every which way as she bobs up and down several times.

"But we're finally _here _now, and it's going to be _awesome_." Turning her head, she glares off into the distance. "Except for that it's barely even warm here. That part kinda drags, but we're going to keep a positive outlook on all of it. Alright?" From the way she's rambling, I get the idea she's more trying to convince herself than she is us.

"Sure thing, Chiharu." Tomoyo expertly slips by the exasperated girl and immediately makes her way to where her blue-haired boyfriend stands, watching her with soft eyes. It makes me a bit envious how open and easygoing they are about their feelings. I wish I could be more like that.

Before I can stop myself, I find my eyes wandering over to the tall spot of green that's been on my radar since the second it came into my line of sight.

He's not looking at me when my eyes fall upon him. He stands across from Yamazaki, grinning widely at something Naoko is telling them, her eyes lit up in the same way they do whenever she gets too enthusiastic about something. Rika listens from opposite of Naoko, just smiling at Naoko's antics. I watch them for a while, mainly focused on the brunette in the forest green top. I almost want him to turn around and notice me, but I also don't want him to catch me staring.

A tap on my arm makes my tunnel vision disappear. "Hm?" I turn around to find Chiharu watching me with a confused and slightly worried look on her face.

"Hey, you okay? You seem kinda… Out of it today."

"I'm fine. Just tired. Didn't get much sleep last night." It's not entirely untrue. I really didn't get a lot of sleep last night. Part of it was because I was packing. Another part of it was something else…

"You sure? Come to think of it, what ever happened to you on new year?" I cringe a little at the question. "You, Tomoyo, Hiiragizawa, and Li all vanished right before the fireworks. You guys missed the best part."

"Oh…" I anxiously glance over at Tomoyo, but she's not looking at me. "Yeah, we all just…"

"Hey, Sakura, Chiharu!"

I give silent thanks to Naoko for speaking up before I can saying else, because I wasn't even sure where I was going with it. Then I turn around and can't decide if it's really much of an improvement. Naoko is grinning evilly at me, sending shivers up and down my spine.

"What?" I ask cautiously. Her grin just seems to widen. Beside her, Yamazaki wears his signature grin, and Syaoran is just standing with his back to me, shaking his head.

"I just had a wonderful idea. Care to listen?"

I glance over at Chiharu, who shrugs.

"Sure," I say slowly and follow alongside Chiharu to where they all stand in a mini-circle.

When we're within a few feet, Syaoran glances sideways at us. I don't mean to look, but the problem is that I never wasn't looking at him. If I were to guess, I probably look the exact opposite from him. He looks completely calm and casual, as if he doesn't have a care in the world. As if he didn't just a few days ago tell me he's in love with me.

It's his relaxation that I find the strangest. It's almost as if none of it ever happened. And then he smiles, and I know that it did. His smile isn't the same as it's been the past nine-plus years I've known him. I've seen him look at me this way before, but only very rarely. My face feels a bit warmer, and I'm almost certain it isn't just because the weather here is nicer than in Tomoeda.

"Alright, you two stop with the googly eyes."

Syaoran's face abruptly darkens, and he glares at Chiharu while she innocently walks by him on her way to Yamazaki's side.

"What is it, Naoko?"

Naoko blinks as if coming to, then easily slips back into her excited state, rapidly speaking with vigor. "Right, so I was thinking that tonight we should all meet up and tell _ghost stories_!"

Her words are like a slap to the face. "G-Ghost stories?" I choke out.

"Yeah, doesn't it sound great?"

"Um…"

"You'll come, right?"

"Well…" What am I supposed to do? Say no? "Yeah, sure... I guess."

"Great! Since the boys and girls dorms are separate, we'll have to meet up somewhere in order to do it. Rika suggested that we do it in the common area, but I think it would be way cooler if were to do it somewhere dark."

"The sun goes down early this time of year. We could do it outside and we'd still be able to make it back in time for lights out." Now it's Chiharu stabbing me in the back. She knows how much I hate ghost stories. And the dark. Especially the two of them combined.

"Yeah! Nice thinking, Chiharu!" I want to vomit when the two hi-five, but instead I just turn my head away, only to be met with both Rika and Syaoran. Rika is giggling at the other two, while Syaoran is back to shaking his head at their antics.

"Don't you guys think it's a bit cold to be staying out late telling ghost stories?"

"Oh, that's the best part! I actually heard from one of the teachers that they have fire pits spread out across the resort. Bring a blanket and you'll be fine." And yet another stab.

"Great," I mumble. "Just great."

At that very moment, Syaoran decides to lean down and whisper something into my ear. "It won't be that bad. If it is, just signal, and I'll pull you out."

I gasp a bit, and with my face feeling like a thousand degrees, I leap away from him, drawing the other's attention. Syaoran looks surprised by my reaction at first, then something seems to click, and his eyes fall as he turns away from me.

Across from us, Chiharu narrows her eyes and scrutinizes us. "What's up with you two lately? It's like ever since New Years, you two have been acting weird. Sakura's become socially awkward around Li, and Li is acting way too nice."

"Mihara…"

"Chiharu," Rika quietly scolds. "You're being intrusive. They may not be comfortable talking about it."

Chiharu doesn't look too happy, but Rika's words shut her up.

"Whatever. The truth will come out one way or another. Until then, could you two at least _try_ to act like ordinary human beings around each other. The abnormal behavior is starting to give me the creeps."

She finally switches topics, much to my relief. "So, meet up again around five?"

I give a weak nod in response. Could things really get any worse?

Of course, they always do. This time is no exception.

* * *

"Alright, Sakura, it's four-fifty; in other words, time to get your butt out here and come with us to tell ghost stories!" Chiharu's voice travels through the door sounding just as loud as it would without the one-inch thick wooden object in the way.

"Just a minute!"

"You said that like five minutes ago!"

I wince. "It hasn't been that long."

"Sakura!"

"Alright, fine!" Frustrated, I throw the door open and come marching out of the bathroom.

"Finally," Chiharu mumbles behind me. "Alright, you guys, we can go now."

"Took long enough."

Tomoyo walks up to me. "Don't worry, Sakura, it will be fine. None of what anyone says is true, anyways."

"I know, but that doesn't make it any less scary to think about." It might be a lie that I know. Sure, realistically, none of what anyone says is true, but… Well, it's still terrifying. Even if I find it almost impossible to ever picture myself being possessed by an evil spirit and forced to commit suicide, that doesn't mean that it doesn't scare me to think about.

"Off to join the fun," I mumble as Chiharu and Naoko all but drag me out the door.

And so, that's how I have somehow found myself sitting around a fire, alone, trying not to die from anxiety while waiting for the rest of the group to show up.

"For crying out loud, what are they _doing_? They're guys, it's not supposed to take them this long."

"Maybe they forgot to look at the clock."  
"Maybe they ate too much at dinner, and passed out as soon as they got back to their room."

"Maybe they all got lost."

"Or maybe they were abducted by aliens," I chime in, eager to get my mind off of what will happen when they _do_ arrive. I don't know why aliens are always my go-to.

"Oh, oh! Maybe, just maybe, they tripped and fell into a huge puddle and had to go back because they were cold, but since there's only one shower, they all had to take turns, and _that's _why they're so late."

"What's why who is so late?" At the sound of Syaoran's familiar voice, my stomach does a little flip.

"Li! What took you all so long?"

"Don't look at me; Takashi was the one who wouldn't stop lecturing our roommates long enough for me to get in that we had to leave. Plus, Eriol was too busy tag teaming with Takashi to notice the time."

"Gotta help a friend out."

Syaoran takes the action I'm refraining from by rolling his eyes.

"Right, and what about me?"

Eriol just smiles apologetically and makes his way over to where Tomoyo is sitting. I'm still annoyed with her. She made me sit by myself even though I'm her best friend, and she _knows _that I'm afraid of these stories. I really resent Eriol sometimes. If he weren't so good to Tomoyo, I would totally be putting most of my time into an effort to be rid of him.

Wait a minute... Takashi is sitting next to Chiharu. It's not unusual by any means. If fact, I'd be more surprised if he didn't. Rika and Naoko are also sitting together. Plus, of course, everyone's favorite couple is already getting cozy, which leaves me the only person sitting alone. In other words, the last seat is next to me... With one person left...

My mind registers the information too late. Before I know it, I'm sitting beside the person who I both want to hug and kiss as well as shy away from. This is going to be a long night.

"Hey, Sakura."

The warm, familiar voice invades my thoughts and forces me to lift my gaze. Syaoran smiles down at me as if I'm his favorite person in the entire world. He leaves me breathless in the best possible way.

"Hi, Syaoran."

The smile that rises to my own lips comes naturally, but I get the feeling it's more of a giddy schoolgirl smile. When he gives me a curious look, I quickly look away. Thankfully, Chiharu takes the lead, as always, and starts up the conversation.

"Alright," she begins, "who wants to start us off?"

Are there crickets out in the winter, or is that just my imagination?

Chiharu cringes. "Um, okay, fine, I'll just go first then." She clears her throat. "So, there was this guy..." She pauses, then snaps. "This atmosphere isn't working at all! It feels more like we're going to roast marshmallows than tell scary ghost stories."

"Maybe we just need a build up," Naoko offers.

"If I may," Eriol's voice draws the attention of the rest of us, "I believe I can solve our problem." A mischievous glint appears in our foreign friend's eye, and his lips turn up in a way that sends shivers down my spine.

Great. This is exactly why I have such mixed feelings about him. I don't have any idea what Tomoyo sees in him.

And thus, the storytelling commences.

* * *

"Then there was a loud creaking sound."

_Oh no. Not the creaking sound._

"So the prince got up to go investigate."

_No! No! No! Everybody knows you're not supposed to go to the sound! Haven't you ever seen a horror movie?_

"And when he opened the bedroom door and peered out into the hall, he found... his own sister standing there, her eyes completely white as if they'd rolled back in her head, and in her hands, the blade sharp enough to chop down an entire tree with one fluid swipe, was a ginormous battle axe from deep inside the castle's armory."

_No! Why did it have to be an axe?_

"And all the poor, petrified boy could do was stand and watch as his sister raised the axe high above her head... and brought it down with the force of an entire army."

There's a silence that follows. My body and hands tremble as I try not to think of myself in the same situation. We've been at this whole story-telling thing for over half an hour now, but the others aren't showing any signs of letting up any time soon.

Naoko's lips turn up, and her eyes trail across all of us as if she's plotting how to murder us and hide our bodies. "Needless to say, the walls and floors were painted with blood that night."

At her words, I bite my lip and squeeze my eyes shut. I don't know how much more of this I can take.

"Sakura," Syaoran whispers.

I lift my head just enough to look up at him. He leans closer to me, and speaks quietly, his face just a few inches from my own.

"Do you want to leave?"

A wave of relief and gratitude washes over me. Hastily, I nod.

"Alright, come on." Syaoran pulls away and rises to his feet. The others all look over at us, and Syaoran motions for me to get up. Still confused, I stand. "Hate to leave early, but Sakura's tired, and I'm getting pretty cold anyway, so I'm gonna go ahead and take her back now."

"So soon?"

"Yeah, sorry."

"Oh... Well, alright. See you when we get back, Sakura. Goodnight, Li."

"Goodnight."

Syaoran rests his hand on the small of my back and guides me away from the others. Once we're out of hearing range, he remove his hand.

"Is this okay?"

I don't look up as I quietly reply. "Yes. Thank you."

"Sure. Will you be alright on your own when we get back, or do you want to go to the common area for a while?"

"I think I'll be fine if I go back."

"Alright, then."

We continue walking in silence. The entire situation feels awkward. I don't know what to do or say anymore. Syaoran said for me not to feel pressured, but surely I can't avoid the conversation forever like I tried to do about our friendship.

I thought that, put in this situation, what to do would come easily to me. If my life were a fairy tale, then I would have leapt into Syaoran's arms the second he confessed. I would have told him I love him, too, and we would've live happily ever after.

Things are never as simple as they are in stories, though. And now I'm left to figure out what to do. I want to tell him now more than ever, but I have that lingering doubt that even if I do, more conflicts will arise.

I'm afraid that if I try to advance my relationship with Syaoran, I won't be able to let him go. And that's where it all falls apart. No matter what, I can't be with him–not for as long as I want to, anyways.

"Sakura."

I draw my attention back to Syaoran's physical presence beside me. He looks at me with an earnest expression.

"I know that this must be strange for you, and you probably don't know what to say to me, but you don't have to dance around topics with me."

"You say that, but..."

"Yeah, you don't need to try to say it."

"You make it seem so easy," I say, watching my feet. "Aren't you embarrassed?"

"Embarrassed?" His shock compels me to lift my head and meet his gaze. "Well, I'm not embarrassed about my feelings for you." He says it while looking me straight in the eyes. "Don't get me wrong, this isn't easy for me, either, but the only thing that's different is that now you _know_ I have feelings for you. They've always been there, Sakura. That hasn't changed."

I look down at my feet again, this time to hide my blush. "There are things I need to talk to you about, Syaoran. When we get back to Tomoeda... Once this trip is over, I'll tell you them." I face him again with a serious and almost desperate sense of need. "Can you wait until then?"

Syaoran's eyes soften. "I already told you I would, didn't I?"

We approach the cabin I'm sharing with the other girls and come to a stop in front of it.

"You're way too nice to me," I tell him quietly.

"That's because I want you to take me seriously."

"I am. I do... It stresses me when you're this serious, though."

"Oh?" Relief washes over me as Syaoran flashes me that knowing smirk that I love so much. "Are you sure you don't just miss being able to bicker with me?"

"Psh... Wha...?" I innocently look away. "What are you even talking about?"

"Eh? Playing dumb, are we?"

"Hey!"

Syaoran chuckles. "Yeah, yeah."

I huff, but eventually give in. "Alright, fine. Maybe just a little."

"Called it."

I shake my head. At that moment, Syaoran starts to shift. "Alright, then. Best be leaving on a lighter note, then."

"Huh? You're leaving?" I spin around when he walks past me.

"Yep."

Watching him go, I suddenly find myself stepping forward and reaching out for him. "Wait!"

Syaoran looks back this time with a startled look on his face. "Sakura..." I realize then that I've grabbed hold of his shirt.

"Oh!" I quickly rush to release the cloth and pull my hand back. "Sorry."

"It's fine." He turns fully around and studies me with worried eyes. "Are you sure you'll be alright?"

I assume he's talking about my nervousness after all the ghost stories. "Yeah, I'll be fine. Sorry. You can go."

Even when I step away from him, he still doesn't move.

"You first."

"Huh?" I look up at him, and he, in turn, nods towards the building.

"I'll leave once you're inside."

Glancing back at the door, a small, "Oh," escapes my lips. Even though I know I have to move, I don't.

Syaoran sighs. "You're too much sometimes." The soft, caring tone contradicts his words. Next, he steps by me to the door. "You've got the key, right?"

Snapping out of it, I reach into my pocket. "Yeah, hold on." After fishing around for a moment, I pull out the key. "Here." I hand it to him. Syaoran takes the key and unlocks the door, then pushes it open and steps inside.

"Looks all clear."

I follow in after him. "I never said I thought that there were ghosts lurking around in the room."

"You didn't, but I wouldn't put it past you to be thinking it." He jingles the key in front of me. Once I've lifted my palm, he drops them in it. "Do you need anything else? I could check in the closet or under the beds if it'll make you feel any better."

My face feels suddenly warmer. "No! Geez, stop teasing me."

Amusement flashes in his eyes. "Alright, fine, I'll stop."

"Good. Now, get out. This is a girl's cabin; you shouldn't even be in here."

"So cold." Ignoring the comment, I usher him out the door. "Alright, alright. Relax, I'm going."

Once he's through the door, I pull it far enough closed that my body blocks out the rest of the room. "Oh, and Syaoran!"

"Yeah?"

"It's just..." I find it harder to say with Syaoran's eyes on me, but manage to get out the words I want to say. "Thanks again for earlier."

Rather than voicing his reply, Syaoran just smiles kindly. "Good night, Sakura."

"Good night, Syaoran."

* * *

I can't fall asleep. It's as simple as that.

I'm laying in the top bunk of the bed I'm sharing with Tomoyo, unable to close my eyes for more than a few seconds. I close them, but when I try to relax, they spring right back open.

"Tomoyo?" I whisper.

"Hm?" Her groggy, half-asleep voice comes from beneath me.

"Are you still awake?"

"Barely. What's the matter? Are you still scared because of the stories from earlier?"

"What?" I squeak, a bit too loud. Across the room, Naoko rolls in her sleep and curls up like she's cold. Lowering my voice this time, I say defensively, "I'm not. I just can't seem to fall asleep."

"Right," Tomoyo sarcastically agrees. "And I'm sure that has nothing to do with ghost stories from earlier. Nothing at all."

I grumble at her attitude. She's really not entirely right. Sure, I'm a little on edge because of all the stories everyone was telling, but what's weighing heavy on my mind is an entirely different matter.

"Whatever. It's killing me just laying here, though." Grabbing the wooden rail, I lean over the side of the bunk and look down at Tomoyo. "Hey, I think I'm gonna go take a walk, alright?"

"What?" Finally, Tomoyo sits up in her bed and leans to the side of the bed I'm on. "It's past lights out, Sakura; in other words, we can't go wandering around. Besides, it's dark out."

"Oh, come on, Tomoyo. It's not like I'll be going far. And besides, it's not _that_ late."

"Sakura..."

She doesn't have to go on. I can tell from her tone that she's against it.

"Please, Tomoyo."

She groans and rolls over. "Ugh. Fine, Sakura. It's not like I'm going to stop you."

"Yay!" I cheer as quietly as I can. "Thank you, Tomoyo. I'll try not to take too long."

Relieved, I climb down the ladder, but just as I'm about to turn, Tomoyo grabs my hand.

"What is it?"

She looks over her shoulder at me with earnestly concerned eyes.

"Tomoyo?"

"Just... Be careful, alright, Sakura?"

Her tone leaves me uneasy, but I force a smile to my face. "I'll be fine, Tomoyo. Don't worry."

And with that, I grab the flashlight from my things and slip out of the cabin. As I shut the door behind me, I heave a sigh. Tomoyo worries too much sometimes. It almost seems strange for her to be so worried about me since she's been too busy with her new boyfriend these past few weeks to pay me much mind. Hopefully when they've been dating for a little longer, Tomoyo won't be so infatuated with him.

Tomoyo's strange behavior isn't something I have time to worry about, though. With everything going on with Syaoran, I haven't even noticed a lot of the things going on around me.

Pushing away from the door, I make my way down the path leading to the beach. Once my shoes have sunken into the sand, I turn left and wander up along the coast. As I go, I find my thoughts wandering back to the inner conflict I was having earlier.

I told Syaoran that we would talk once this trip is over, but I'm not sure what to say to him, let alone how to say it. In truth, I want nothing more than to tell him that I love him, that I return his feelings, but I know there's more to consider than just how I feel now. In less than three months, Syaoran will be on his way back to Hong Kong, leaving Tomoeda possibly for good. It's hard enough for me to bear thinking about. If I allow myself to be with Syaoran the way I want to, I don't know if I'll be able to stand being apart from him and not knowing if he'll ever return to me. A long distance relationship is one thing, but not knowing if I'll ever be able to be beside the one I love is an entirely different matter.

In addition, I fear that no matter what path I choose to take, I'll just be a burden to him. I can't ask him not to leave me. At the same time, if and when he does, this is going to hurt, and trying to be together with him is just going to make it that much more painful for both of us.

Coming to a stop, I look up at the near-black ocean.

"When did life become so cruel?" I whisper to myself. Had all of this happened just a year or two ago, I wouldn't be hesitating. What's different? How can so much change in such little time? I know the answer, though. It's the cruel fate of life.

"We're growing up," I say, raising one hand and holding it before me to block out the full moon. It is no longer that of a child. With graduation a mere three months away, I can't think in the mindset of a teenage girl in high school, because that's not all I am anymore. Syaoran said something similar once about us no longer acting like children and instead settling our affairs like soon-to-be adults we are.

"So much for the life of simplicity." I laugh dryly and drop my hand again. When I finally stop to look around, I find myself no longer on the beach. Instead, I've somehow wound up on the long, rocky cliff that protrudes from the shore. It's relatively flat near the bottom where I stand and quite close to the water.

Turning on the flashlight, I shine it over the wall of earth that goes up nearly fifteen feet or so. How I'm at the end of it, staring out at the ocean, is beyond me, but I sigh and decide it's probably about time I head back, for fear Tomoyo might get even more worried than she was when I left. Turning around, I make my way back to shore, shining the beam of light in front of me.

I've only made it a little ways when the waves lapping against the rocks send water spraying onto the stone and effectively getting droplets of water splashed from my ankle to my knee. That's when I at last notice just how restless the tides are. Shining the light out across the water, I observe waves larger than the ones from earlier in the day forming and crashing against the shore.

My breath shallows, and I quickly move to step away from the edge. A little too hastily, perhaps, given that the surface I step on is still wet. So, before I can even think to be more careful, I find myself falling. The ground disappears beneath my feet, and everything becomes disorienting.

Then I scream. Or, at the very least, try to. The ocean water soon breaks my fall and welcomes my warm body into it's frigid depths. Any attempt to be heard is lost then, and I clamp my mouth shut, thrashing in a violent panic to get my head above water once more.

It all happens so fast that I scarcely have time to realize what's going on.

My head breaks the surface and I gasp for air, only to continuously dip below the surface. Sputtering and gasping, I manage one final cry for help before another wave comes and pushes me under once more.

_No. This can't be real._

But it is. Every time I try to push up, it's just to get sent shoved back down again. I don't know which way is up and which way is down. Even when I think my eyes are open, all I see is darkness.

The shoes on my feet make it even harder to move. My arms, covered by an oversized jacket, don't move fluidly through the water as they should. Everything on my body seems to weigh me down and drag me farther into the depths of the unknown.

My lungs scream for air. Water pushes against my lips, eager to be let in. I know I'm drowning. Despite my best efforts to stop it, pockets of air escape from between my lips.

One horrid, wretched thought crosses my mind at that moment.

_I'm going to die._

It seems the only possible outcome. I can't fight forever. Every part of my body aches. The pain is unbearable.

Yet, amongst all the pain and struggle is one small light of hope as a possible thought passes the mind fights to stay conscious. It's the thought that maybe I'll see my mother. A dangerous thought that dares me to let go, because wherever she is, it must be warm and calm and _safe_.

Then I think of all my friends and my recently reunited family. I can't stop fighting it. I can't.

But it's too much. The salty ocean water passes my lips.

_Let go. Everything will be alright. Just let go._

So I do. I let go and fade away into a world of complete darkness.

* * *

**And thus, I leave you all on a cliffhanger.**

**I'm pretty sure (as usual) I had more I wanted/needed to say to you guys, but (yet again) I'm coming up with nothing. So, since I have poor memory, and it's just been way too long, I'll be leaving you all now.**

**Oh, and happy Super Bowl Sunday to those who watched it (the game just ended a few minutes ago here from when I'm writing this).**

**To everyone else, I hope you all have a wonderful week. And who knows, maybe I'll be back with chapter 30 in time for Valentines Day. No promises, though.**


	30. On the Brink of Life and Death

**Damn 8 thousand word chapters. Couldn't very well cut in half again, though, now could I?**

**Anyways, this is indeed another way-too-long chapter. There's no way it could've been together with 29, no matter how much I wanted it to be. I think you all should enjoy it, though. The ending might make you have some... I don't know; mixed feeling, I suppose. I decided to take a chance with it, so just let me know what you think. If it's too much, then tell me.**

**Read the chapter and enjoy it. Shouldn't be too hard. I'm actually really pleased with how it turned out in the end. Hopefully you all are, too.**

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

I can't seem to fall asleep. It's a problem that I seem to be having a lot lately, and is really starting to unnerve me. The difference is that this time around there's an unsettling feeling in the pit of my stomach. As if I didn't already have enough to deal with. Ever since I told Sakura that I have feelings for her, she's been on-edge around me. It doesn't help that all of our so-called 'friends' refuse to just leave it alone. Instead they decide to outright ask what's going on. When did people get so intrusive, anyways?

After about half an hour of absentmindedly staring at the ceiling, I give up on sleep, because laying in my bunk, listening to Takashi snore and wondering if he has a deviated septum isn't exactly what I consider soothing. I exit the cabin as quickly and quietly as the old floorboards and creaking door will allow, before heading down to the ocean.

The second my bare feet come in contact with the sand, I feel myself relax. Sitting down, I lean back and stare up at the night sky. The moon shines full and bright among the stars. There aren't many, and of all of them, a few blink in and out of existence, reminding me again of my least favorite form of transportation.

The reason for my distaste towards air travel doesn't have to do with the uncomfortable and far too cramped seating, or even the tedious security, as annoying as all of that may be. No, the reason I hate it is because every time I'm in that airplane, I have to look out the window at the Pacific Ocean thousands of feet below and remember that I don't have just one home. That alone has never bothered me much, though. What bothers me is the seventeen hundred miles between them. They aren't so much as on the same land mass.

After spending most of my life like this, one might think I'm used to it being that way. I am, of course, but as I've gotten older, I'm also forced to come to terms with the fact that when the time comes, I'll be forced to choose where I'm going to spend the rest of my adult life. Hong Kong is where my family and the company are; I have a responsibility to be there so that I can support my mother and sisters. But to do that would mean leaving my life in Japan behind. It's an inevitable reality that I'm not ready for, even with my graduation just a few months away.

"Li-kun?"

I blink at the sound of my own name. Usually I'm able to pick up on when there's someone approaching me from behind, but this time, I was so deep in thought that it took the person actually speaking to catch my attention.

I recognize the voice, but as I turn back to look at her, I'm still a bit surprised by who I find.

"Daidouji, I didn't hear you. What are you doing out this late?"

I watch the violet eyed girl survey her surroundings. "You haven't seen Sakura out here, have you?"

"No. Why? Is she missing?"

"Well..." Daidouji shifts uncomfortably, a worried look on her face. "It's not that she's missing per-say; she left the cabin a while ago to go for a walk. It's only been fifteen minutes, but–I don't know, really. I've just have this bad feeling ever since she left the cabin. I'm sure it's nothing and she's fine, but..." Daidouji trails off for a moment, then snaps out of it, shaking her head. "Never mind. Anyways, what are you still doing out here, Li? It's getting chillier out by the minute."

"Couldn't sleep, so I figured I'd get some fresh air."

"Oh," is all she says.

She doesn't turn to go or say anything, so I decide to ask, "Do you want me help you look?"

"Oh, no. It's fine. I know I'm being ridiculous."

"Are you sure? If it'll put your mind at ease, I really don't mind."

"Thank you, Li-kun, but I'm sure I'll find her soon, and when I do, I don't want her to think I was freaking out for nothing. I'll just go swing by the main building next. She probably stopped there to sit by the fire. Sorry for bothering you."

"Don't be. And if you still can't find her after checking the main building, come get me. Even if it is nothing, she shouldn't be wandering around so late to begin with."

Daidouji nods and turns to go. Now deep in thought, I gaze out at the ocean again.

Daidouji is a very perceptive person. At times it's almost as if she's psychic. Still, I have a hard time believing Sakura would be daft enough to put herself in a situation that would potentially get her in trouble, even if she can be a bit too thoughtless at times.

I sigh, and my eyes follow the nearly invisible horizon line from where the full moon shines down, casting its reflection upon the ocean waves, all the way to the way to the flat plain of rocks that extend off the shore. Then something catches my eye. In the night that's so dark, I can scarcely differentiate the ocean from the sky, there's a speck of light at the tip of the rocks. Squinting, I can just barely make out the outline of a person as they turn, casting the beam of light away.

_What in the world?_ I think, frowning.

And then I don't have time to question it anymore. Before I can finish drawing in a breath, my lungs stop working.

All I can do is watch the light abruptly change directions, darting to and fro along the wall of stone. Then there's the shrill cry that barely reaches my ears, but has me on my feet before I can ever register as the outline continues to slip and descend upon the crashing waves beneath it.

"No." My mind hasn't even thought up the possibility by time the word is out my mouth.

"Daidouji," I call over my shoulder. She looks back at me, startled. "Go get a teacher. Now!"

The frightened girl doesn't even waste a second to question my urgent words. Even if she did, I'm too far gone to hear her.

My feet pound mercilessly against the grains of sand beneath them.

_Please, please. Please, don't let it be her._

Daidouji's words echo through my mind. _She left the cabin a while ago to go for a walk._

It can't be, though. If something happened to Sakura, I don't know what I would...

_I just have this unsettling feeling in the pit of my stomach. I'm sure it's nothing, and she's fine, but..._

My legs move on their own, carrying me toward the rocks. Feet pound violently against the wet sand. My eyes never once leave the spot the person vanished. I can see them thrashing vigorously against the current, but the waves push them back under.

"Help!" The cry reaches my ears just as my bare foot hits the rock with a loud smack. I pull my t-shirt over my head and throw it aside as I go. Panic seethes through me. That voice… Suddenly the person is gone completely, dragged back down by the relentless waves.

Every single movement seems drag on forever: every second that passes, every step I take...

The water breaks around me and envelopes me in a bone-chilling embrace. Fully submerged, I swim downwards, reaching out to find something–anything. My hands are searching wildly when they finally make contact. Immediately, I wrap my fingers around the cloth in my hand and pull it close. Sure enough, when my other hand comes in contact, it meets human skin.

I wrap my arms around the person and pull them close before kicking back to the surface. The second my head is above the water, I'm gasping for air. The lifeless body in my arms lurches backward. Then my eyes land on the person's face and I feel my heart stop.

Sakura.

Her jaw hangs slack, mouth partly open. Strands of auburn hair stick to her face.

I'm too stunned to move for a second. Then the rough current pulls me back to reality.

The current fights to pull us farther out to sea. Each stroke feels like a never-ending effort to reach salvation. The rocks look just a few yards away, but the distance never seems to lessen. If anything, it feels even greater.

Everything feels wrong. My body doesn't feel like my own. I feel violently sick. The need to scream at the world leaves my body trembling, and my entire being aches for the one in its arms, so close physically, yet it's never felt farther away.

It feels like an eternity has passed by the time I finally feel the cold stone beneath the palm of my hand. With one strained movement, I haul both of our bodies onto the side of the rock. For a moment all I'm able to do is push myself onto my back and gasp for air. As I turn my head to the side, though, I forget about everything else except for the girl next to me who isn't moving.

I curse as I shove myself to my feet and grab Sakura under the arms to drag her the rest of the way ashore. A moment later, I'm dropping to my knees beside her. Hovering closely over her, I listen for her breath.

Nothing.

My heart seems to stop then. "No..."

Trembling, I bring my hands up and rest them in the center of her chest. "This isn't happening," I murmur to myself, pressing down on her chest. My mind races. I can't so much as think straight. How many compressions was it? Thirty?

I try to count. I try to focus on the medical treatment I've learned. More than anything, I try not to think about who the person I'm giving CPR to is. But I can't. Every time I try, I look up again only to find the pale, lifeless face of my best friend laying on the cold rocks beneath us.

I don't know how many I've done when I stop. Pulling my hands away from her chest, I move closer to her face. First I slip a hand under her head to angle it, and then I pinch her nose. I don't even have time to hesitate or think about it before bringing my head down. One long inhale, and I bring my mouth over hers. Then I breath out through my mouth and repeat.

Afterwards, I lift myself up and position my hands in the center of her chest once more. Before I can continue, though, strange noises draw my attention away from the task at hand.

Standing a few feet away, with her pale hands clutching her horrified face, stands Sakura's best friend. Frightening gasping sounds escape her gaping mouth. It's a strangled cry that makes my entire body stiffen. She gasps for air like she's in a room with the oxygen rapidly seeping out. Then she emits a loud, high, and grief-stricken scream. With it, everything else seems to stop. The sounds of the ocean cease, and the air around us stills to a halt.

Once it's over, the hysterical girl goes crumbling to the ground, caught mere seconds before hitting it. Terada keeps a firm grip on her arms to prevent her from slipping.

It pains me to watch as she struggles against him, fighting to get closer to the girl just barely alive before me.

From behind them, Ms. Mizuki comes running towards us. "I'll take over from here, Li."

Relieved by her presence, I pull away so that she can take over.

"How long were you doing this before we got here?" Mizuki doesn't look up as she speaks.

I have to compose myself before responding. "Not long; I only got through one set."

Mizuki nods, gives Sakura two breaths, and returns to the chest compressions.

Right then, a new voice joins the commotion. "Tomoyo!" I force my eyes away from Sakura again to see Eriol running towards us with Takashi hot on his heels.

"One of you call an ambulance. Now." Mizuki's words are stern and commanding.

Terada complies without a moment's hesitation, letting Eriol take over calming the frantic girl in his arms.

A few feet away, Takashi takes less than a second to assess the situation, and steps up behind me, resting a hand on my shoulder. It's meant to comfort me, but I can practically feel him holding his breath.

I watch Sakura's face as water starts to trickle from between her lips. My body continues to shudder, and I reach out to take one of her cold, limp hands between my own. "Don't you dare leave me." I clutch her hand tighter, holding it close.

Seconds tick by, and again, I hear more voices. They all buzz in my ears, making it impossible to think. Takashi's hand vanishes.

"What's going on? Takashi... Who is that? Why-why isn't she... Takashi. Let go! Let go of me, Takashi! Stop... Sakura!"

More voices.

More sobs.

More panic.

More chaos.

And all the while, Sakura continues to lay unmoving on the rock, water trickling from her lips.

"Don't do this to me..." I whisper to her, squeezing my eyes shut and holding her hand to my face. "Please..."

Then I feel it. Like the answer to my pleas, the slightest movement comes from between my clasped hands. It's so faint that I almost think I imagined it, but when I look up I feel it again. This time it clamps down around my hand so tightly that I think my blood circulation will be cut off.

In front of me, Ms. Mizuki pulls her hands away as Sakura's face contorts in pain.

In a flash, she's coughing up water. I can practically feel the collective sigh that befalls the group of people surrounding the event.

I can't decide what to feel as I accept that Sakura is, in fact, breathing again. Her hand grasps mine as if it's a lifeline, and I realize that up until this point, it was me clinging to her for that same assurance.

"Sakura..."

Her actions startle me as she reaches out and grabs my arm to support herself. I help her stay up by holding my arm out for her to lean against and taking hold of her upper arm. She continues to cough for a while, her grip on my arm tight as iron. When she finally stops, she fall sideways, collapsing against me.

Everything is quiet then. Nobody says anything, but everyone watches as Sakura rests her head against my chest and breaths strangled gasps. Releasing my grip on her hand, I pull her tightly into my arms, not sure if I should dare myself to believe it. Believe that she's truly alright. There's no denying that the girl in my arms is alive, though. Not when her arms wind around my bare torso and her fingers dig painfully into the exposed skin of my back. It's a welcomed pain, though. A sign of life.

In the distance I can faintly make out the sound of sirens growing nearer and nearer. I try to ignore them, not wanting this moment to end. Not wanting to let go of what's in front of me. But as Mizuki's hand touches my shoulder, I know I have to let her go. Still, my grip tightens.

"Li," the woman's voice is soft and reassuring. "You can't carry her back on your own. She's going to be fine, I promise."

I know she's right, but it isn't until I've handed Sakura off to Terada and risen to my own feet that I realize to just what extent. Almost immediately, my knees give out beneath me. Takashi grabs my arm and pulls it over his shoulder before I can try again, which I'm thankful for, because my entire body suddenly feels stiff and weak. Be it from the cold winter air after the dip in the ocean, the overdrive of emotions, or a mix of both, every part of my body feels like it's frozen over.

"Thanks."

"Just take it easy, alright? If you don't catch hypothermia, you're guaranteed to keel over from exhaustion in your current state."

I decide to ignore him. The others part to make way for Terada as he hastily carries Sakura back towards shore. Mizuki follows close behind, giving the rest of us orders as we go.

"Sasaki, I need you, Mihara, and Yanagisawa to go fetch as many blankets as you can from your room and a spare change of clothes for Sakura. Hiiragizawa, you find a dry shirt and pair of pants for Li before he freezes. Yamazaki, watch over Li for now, and Daidouji, you come with me. Are we all clear?"

A few nod, but most just gawk at her before dispersing once we've reached the resort.

Everything following just gives me a sense of dread. The ambulance arrives and takes Sakura away before I have time to fully recover from my stiffness, and the rest of us are left to pack into one single vehicle and ride the rest of the way to the hospital in silence. The only upside to us getting there is that they decide to examine me to make sure my vitals are in check and they do so in Sakura's room. The others wait somewhere else in the hospital while I sit down beside Sakura, lock my fingers with hers, and allow the nurses to come and go from the room, checking both of us to see if there are any changes in our conditions. Sakura remains unconscious throughout the entire thing whilst I watch her.

I feel a mixture of things as I sit beside her. Part of me, of course, is relieved that she is alive; however, another, much darker part plays the nights events over and over again within me.

What was she even doing out in the first place? What was she thinking by going so close to the water? Did she not think it was dangerous? Could she really be _that_ dense?

It doesn't help when the more personal and selfish thoughts plague me.

What would I do if she had died today? She's the one person on this earth that I don't think I could ever live without. I want to protect her and treasure her, so how is it that she almost died right in front of me? I can't protect her from herself, but what will I do if I can't even save her afterwards?

The questions all begin to blur together eventually, and when my body eventually gives way to much-needed sleep, I'm not sure if I should be thankful or fearful of the dreams to come.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

When I wake up, the first thing I think of is water. Ironic, really, seeing as I almost drowned in the accursed liquid, but with my mouth dry and tongue with the consistency of sandpaper, all I can think about is how soothing a nice glass of water would be.

As my mind tries to recall the taste of ice water, I try to move my jaw. It stays stiff against my will at first, like a box with rusty hinges, but after using more pressure, it snaps closed, so that my teeth meet with a biting sound. I try to swallow next, which turns out to be a big mistake. If I thought my mouth was like a desert _before_, then Sahara must be the name of a lake.

After a few suppressed coughs, I manage to pry my eyes open. Immediately, I wince and squeeze the shut once more, blinded by the piercing white walls that surround me. In my mind I try to reply the events that led up to this. It all comes back to me easily once I stop to recall it, but the memories hit me like a ton of bricks.

The ocean. The pain. The sobs of relief as I experienced the terrifying sensation of not being able to breath for the second time in one night. After that, everything is a surreal blur. I can vaguely recall clinging to someone and seeing familiar faces all staring at me with a mixture of worry and tentative optimism. Then, all too soon, the person holding me let go, and suddenly everything was cold. Even as another pair of arms lifted me up and carried me away to somewhere warm, the only true source of heat had vanished and I was left with a sense of loneliness.

There must have been an ambulance that came soon after, because I can remember the hands of paramedics as they went through some of the things a doctor would: taking my temperature, blood pressure, shining a light into my eyes (an action that now seems strange as I was perfectly conscious when they did it), even looking into my mouth. I don't remember much after that point, though, as I likely fell asleep again.

That all would explain the brightness, though. Almost experimentally, I dare to crack open my lids a second time. I have to blink a few times, but my eyes adjust until I'm staring at a wall that is not white as I had thought, but a bright shade of creamy off-white. For a while, all I do is stare at it. Then movement in my peripheral makes me jump a little and snap my head to the right.

Recognizing the face immediately, I relax into the bed and just stare at him for a while.

Syaoran sleeps soundly in a cushioned recliner at the side of my bed with his elbow resting on the arm of the chair to support his head. He has a blanket wrapped loosely around his shoulders and a shirt on that is way too white to be his. His chest rises and falls evenly and when I listen hard enough, I can faintly make out the sound of his breathing. My heart does a little skip as my eyes trace over the many contours of his face. Despite his otherwise peaceful demeanor, his mouth turns slightly down and his brows twitch together like he's having an unpleasant dream.

Without thinking, I start to lift my hand to reach out and touch him, but am met with resistance. Looking down, I realize for the first time that I'm holding someone's hand. Trailing my eyes up until they reach Syaoran's body and then back down again, I finally take note of how warm my hand is compared to the rest of my body. Our fingers intertwine in a comfortable grasp, and I can't help but blush at the thought that Syaoran was the one who must have done it.

Tightening my grip slightly, I reach across my body with my free hand and touch Syaoran's cheek with the tips of my fingers. His face twitches slightly and if I weren't so dehydrated, I would probably laugh. Curious to see how far I can get before he wakes, I bring a finger to the corner of his lips, and gently encourage the skin upwards, rather than down. He twitches again, only this time he also pulls our hands up a bit which makes me jump a little. Quickly recovering, I decide I've probably tortured him enough, so I lower my hand and try to call out to him. The best I can do is an incoherent mush of different sounds, though. Pain shoots though my throat again, and I decide to just tighten my grip on his hand and tug him a few times.

A grumbling sound comes from beside me, and I watch as Syaoran starts to lift his face from his palm and open his eyes. It's a sight that I find to be endearing to the point that my lips start to hurt from smiling too wide. It takes him a few seconds to fully come-to, but as his eyes meet mine, he wakes right up.

"You're awake. Sorry, I must've fallen asleep." He straightens in his seat and glances down at where our hands are intertwined. I don't know what I expect him to do, but when he carefully slips his fingers out of mine and rises to his feet, a wave of confusion and sadness washes over me. All I can do is watch as he turns away from me and reaches for something beside my bed.

Again, I try to speak his name, but my voice fails me.

"Don't try to say anything," Syaoran commands, facing me again and holding out a small plastic cup for me. "Drink this."

Looking from him to the cup, I reach up and gratefully take the cup. First I take a few small sips, and once I can feel it doesn't burn, I down the rest of the contents.

Syaoran looks satisfied, taking the cup from me and filling it up once more. This time when I've started drinking again, he turns and heads for the door. Immediately, I call out to him.

"Syaoran." This time my voice comes out, but the sound is raspy and strained.

He pauses at the door, his hand resting on the handle when he turns to face me again. It's the look on his face that concerns me next. Although he meets my eyes, there's a certain distance in his gaze, as if he has up a guard. Even his posture seems stiff, and when he speaks, it's apparent that he's doing it with a certain level of self-control he doesn't use unless he's trying to keep himself from saying something he doesn't want to.

"I'm just going to get a nurse and tell the others you're awake. I'll be back in a little while."

Then he swiftly slips through the door before I have time to protest. An unpleasant feeling settles itself at the pit of my stomach as I watch the door slowly close behind him. Looking down, I stare at the half empty cup in my hands.

The nurse comes in a few minutes later to ask me some questions and explain to me what exactly is going on. I listen and nod, but my mind always manages to stray back to Syaoran and when he's going to be back.

Is he mad at me? Why would he be, though?

I'm pulled from my thoughts when the door to my room slowly opens. My heart almost leaps though my throat in anticipation, but when the face appears in the doorway peering hesitantly inward, it's not a pair of amber eyes that I'm met with. Nonetheless, a warm feeling passes over me as the door abruptly swings the rest of the way open and the person on the other side comes sprinting across the room into my arms.

"Sakura! Oh, thank goodness you're finally awake. I was so scared when Li pulled you out, and then when we finally all got here, they told us you were unconscious!" Tomoyo finally pulls away from me so that she can see my face. Guilt washes over me as tears prick the corners of her eyes. "Don't ever do anything that careless again, do you hear me?"

I manage a stiff nod, to which Tomoyo just shakes her head and collapses against me again. On the other side of the bed, the nurse rises to her feet, smiles softly at us and exits the room.

"You scared me half to death, you know that, Sakura?"

"I know," I whisper lowly, pressing my face into her shoulder.

"And everyone else, too. We were all worried. They're all waiting in the lobby."

"How long?"

"Two hours. Maybe more."

"Should've waited at the resort. I'm fine, really."

Tomoyo pulls away from me. "None of us were about to leave you after what happened, Sakura. You almost..." She can't quite get the words out, which I'm thankful for. Even though I know what happened, I'm not ready to hear it said out loud. "Anyways, you should be thanking Li-kun and Mizuki-sensei. You wouldn't be here now if not for them."

"Syaoran?"

"Didn't I already tell you? He's the one who saw you and pulled you out. Even gave you CPR until Mizuki-sensei arrived. It was terrifying, really. I don't know how else to put it. He almost looked like he was going to be sick at first. Then, as more time passed, I thought he might just break down. He was holding your hand the entire time, saying something to you."

The warmth in my hand. The same warmth that I felt just moments ago when Syaoran's fingers were still intertwined with mine...

Tomoyo glances around the small room. "Speaking of Li-kun, I thought he was in here with you. They looked him over and let him stay with you even though the rest of us had to wait in the lobby."

I shake my head and cast a glance in the direction of the chair Syaoran was sitting in when I first woke up. "He was here, but then he left to get the nurse."

"Oh." Tomoyo nods understanding and then proceeds to study my face. "Did something happen?"

"No, not really. Well, maybe. I'm not sure. He was acting strange, though. All distant and serious."

"Really? You mean he didn't hug you and tell you how glad he was that you're alright?"

"No, none of that." In fact, he actually went out of his way to separate our hands.

"Well that's odd. Maybe he just need some time. After everything that's happened tonight, I can't say I blame him."

This answer doesn't satisfy me in the slightest, but before I can ask her to go on, the door opens again, this time to reveal the person I had initially been hoping to see on the other side.

"Sorry, is this a bad time?"

"No, not at all. What is it, Li-kun?" Tomoyo rises from the bed as Syaoran steps into the room.

"I let the others know you were awake," he says to me, then looks back at Tomoyo again. "Terada is going to talk to the receptionist about when we can leave, but it'll probably be soon. Also, Mizuki wanted me to come find you. She figured you would try to sneak in here sooner or later. Do you want me to go let her know where you are."

A bright shade of pink spreads across Tomoyo's face. "No, I'll go talk to her. Sakura, do you mind if I go?"

I shake my head. "Tell the others I'm alright, though."

"I will," she promises. "Keep her company for me?"

Syaoran nods and makes way for her. Once she's gone, he closes the door quietly and crosses the room. Not once does he say anything or meet my gaze as he makes his way to the chair and pulls it farther away from my bed before sitting down in it. It makes my chest ache to watch him act so distant towards me.

"Syaoran..."

"How are you feeling?"

Startled by the abrupt question, I stumble over my answer. "Alright, I guess."

"Good."

He doesn't show any sign of continuing, so I dare to speak again. "Please look at me."

It takes him a second to comply, and I take note of how he takes a deep breath and closes his eyes briefly in that second. His face remains calm and emotionless as his eyes meet mine.

"Are you mad at me?" My voice is a whisper, unsure of what to expect in response.

Syaoran studies me for a while. "Why would you ask that?"

"The way you're looking at me. Talking to me, too."

"Am I doing something unusual?"

"You are! Don't act like you aren't meaning to. Ever since I woke up, you've been acting strange."

"How exactly, if you don't mind me asking?"

I gape at him momentarily before pulling myself together. "Well, for one, you haven't called me by my name once since I woke up. It's not just that, though. Maybe I'm wrong, but I just thought... After what happened, I assumed you might be a little more, I don't know, happy to see me. But so far, you just feel distant."

"So you assume I'm mad at you?"

"It's the only explanation I can come up with. If I'm wrong, then I'm sorry, but if I'm right, will you please at least talk to me about it?"

Syaoran's eyes watch me for another moment before he turns away. "There's nothing for us to talk about. I'm glad you're alright, and that's all that matters."

"Syaoran..."

"Don't. Just don't. It's been a long enough night as it is. Now just rest until they decide if they're going to discharge you."

"I don't want to rest, Syaoran. I want to know what's bothering you, because whatever it is, it's bothering me now, too."

Another long moment passes before Syaoran finally sighs and turns to me again. "Look, we've been through enough for one day without me getting irritated and yelling at you, so can we please just not get into this right now?"

"No, we can't just _not get into it right now_. If you want to yell at me, then alright, yell at me, but please don't do what I did to you. Don't shut me out under the assumption that I won't understand."

He shakes his head, propping an elbow up on the arm of the chair to run a hand through his hair. "This and that are entirely different things."

"How so?" I challenge.

"Well, for starters, one of us hadn't almost died back then." His tone is laced with venom, and I start to understand.

"So this _is_ about earlier," I state.

He shoots me a dark look, and I flinch away. "Of course it's about 'earlier'."

"Is it because I made everyone worry? Or because I stupidly went wandering off late at night?" My voice starts to rise as the words come tumbling out. "If it is, then I know how idiotic it was. I shouldn't have even been out there, let alone by the water-"

"You're right, you shouldn't have," he says, abruptly cutting me off in a harsh tone. "But you were, nonetheless, and look where we are now."

I frown at this. "Yeah, I got it, alright."

"Have you?" He raises both eyebrows at me in a way that quickly has me feeling undermined. "Because I'm pretty sure from the way you're shrugging it off as if it's nothing that you haven't quite put it all together. You seem to have forgotten, but you almost _died_ less than three hours ago!"

The words are like a slap to the face. They leave me reeling afterwards, trying to maintain control. "Is that really all that's bothering you? That I'm too calm?"

"No, Sakura, it's not. It does piss me off, though, especially considering all of the grief you've caused."

"Well, excuse me for that. I assure you, I wasn't _overly fond_ of it, either. But, hey, you don't seem too torn apart because of it, so at least I didn't cause _too_ much grief, right?"

The second the words are out of my mouth, I'm regretting them. At first he just sits there, gawking at me almost in disgust. Then he turns away, running a hand over his mouth and rises to his feet, pacing across the room. It's then that I recall the words Tomoyo spoke to me earlier.

_He almost looked like he was going to be sick at first. Then the more time that passed, I thought he might just break down. He was holding your hand the entire time saying something to you._

"So that's how it is?" The sound of his voice snaps me back to the present, and all I can to is stare at his back in horror while he speaks. "You think I don't care."

_No_, I want to say. I know he cares. I know because I've clearly hurt him. The way his voice sounds so deeply offended, yet still heart-wrenchingly pained makes it painfully apparent. My voice fails me, though, and instead of speaking, I swing my legs over the side of the bed until my bare feet touch the cold tile.

"But of course. That only makes the most sense, right? After all, it's not like you're my friend or anything." His words are like a knife to the chest. I press a fist close over my heart as I reach the end of the bed and stop a few feet from him. He keeps going, though, this time turning to face me as he speaks.

"Oh no, we aren't friends at all. In fact, I don't even know what I'm doing here. Perhaps I'm simply here because I happened to stumble across somebody daft enough to nearly drown in the middle of the night, and I happened to be the one to pull her out of the water before her heart stopped beating. Yes, that must be it. There's no other explanation. Because were I her friend, and especially if I'd had _feelings_ for her-imagine the horror _then_! I would have undoubtedly had a near heart attack upon realizing just who it was I had pulled out of the water. Shall I continue, or have you had enough?"

He actually stops then to raise his eyebrows questioningly at me. I'm not amused in the slightest by his sarcasm, though. I glare up at him through misty eyes and fight the urge to reach up and slap him hard across the face. Still, I hold back, because despite all of his cruel sarcasm, I can see the desperation in his eyes.

"Are you done?"

"No," he says, dropping the sarcastic undertone. "I'm not, because what you don't seem to understand is exactly what you did to me today. I pulled your lifeless body out of the ocean today, Sakura! I had to perform CPR on you, all the while not knowing if you were even still alive. For me, Sakura, I watched the girl I love almost die right in front of me while I was still trying to save her."

Syaoran's words shake me to the core and I find myself trembling and forcing my head down, tears threatening to fall from my eyes and hands tightly grasping the side of the bed. He doesn't stop, though.

"And had you died–had you never woken up, do you know what I kept thinking? If you had died right there, right beneath me while I tried to save you, I would've spent the rest of my life knowing that I couldn't protect you. That I couldn't save you. And I'd always have to wonder 'what if'. What if it had happened just a little differently? Would she still be here? Would she be sitting here next to me rather than in a grave as cold as the waters she _drowned in_?"

"Stop it!" A storm of unpleasant emotions seeps through me, and my heart clenches. I squeeze my eyes shut, forcing out the buildup of tears. "Just stop already! I get it, alright? I was scared, too, you know!" I yell as loudly as my gasping lungs will allow, my body feeling completely out of my control as it trembles. "I thought I was going to die! I thought I _was_ _dead_! I didn't think I'd ever see my family again. My friends. It terrified me. It still does! I almost died! I'd never have gotten to see anyone again! I'd never get to see _you_ again! I didn't even get to say goodbye. Or thank you. Or tell you that I never want you to leave me, no matter how selfish it may be, because I know I can't ask that of you. It's selfish and greedy, but I just... I can't-"

"Sakura?"

_What_... At the shock on Syaoran's face, I scarcely have time to recall what I've just said. He opens his mouth to speak, but no words come out. Silence envelops the air around us. I don't mean to, but my eyes trail downward. Something comes over me at that moment, making my entire body almost ache to be closer to the warm, protective figure before me. I want to wrap my arms around him and entangle my fingers in his hair. To press my body to his and tell him that I love him. That I want to spend the rest of my life in his arms feeling warm, loved, protected, and utterly at home.

Then, with a foreign sense of courage and spontaneity, I'm sent lunging forward. Maybe it's the fact that I underwent a near death experience, or it could be a delayed response to all of the things Syaoran has said to me over these past few days that always leave me feeling both loved and lonely. Then again, perhaps it's just because of how utterly tired I am of all this. I don't know; nor do I really care, because whatever it is, it has me dragging Syaoran's face down to mine and crashing my lips clumsily against his. It's an unskilled and rushed movement that, while sloppy, feels so right that I find my body moving on its own press farther into the one in front of me.

It doesn't take long for Syaoran to react. It occurs to me that maybe it isn't just me who can feel this strange need. For all I know, it could be fogging up his judgment as it may or may not be doing with my own. None of it seems to matter anymore, though. We're all that's left. Just two people in love, both equally terrified of losing the other. So we allow the intoxicating feeling of need and passion to monopolize our bodies until we're all but falling into each other.

I don't know how long we kiss for. The only thing in my mind is the feeling of Syaoran's lips against mine and how perfectly they seem to mold against each other as Syaoran carefully inclines my head to bring our lips moving in a perfect unison, despite my own lack of experience.

We kiss feverishly, as if it's the first and last time we'll ever get to experience the touch of the other. One of Syaoran's hands carelessly slips inside the gown, causing my breath to hitch slightly as his fingers run along my bare spine. Soon enough, though, I melt into the touch until he settles the hand on the inward curve of my lower back. I, in turn, snake my arms around his neck and clutch his shirt with one hand while the other eagerly runs though his tousled yet pleasantly soft locks.

It's a mixture of pulling his frame closer to mine and pushing my own forward until we're pressed flush against each other that results in me dragging him down with me when I fall back onto the bed behind me. I lose the feeling of his warmth then. Our lips never part for more than a second, but his body loses contact with my own when my back meets the cushioned surface. Instead, it hovers over me, dominant yet protective. Were it anyone else, I would undoubtedly be terrified and struggling to be let up, but with Syaoran I feel safe, like nothing in the world could possibly hurt me as long as he's here.

My thoughts start to feel far-off as I register the knee beside my thigh and the arm beside my head, both keeping Syaoran's frame braced against the bed. His fingers twine with some of my hair and lightly graze my scalp while I let my own hands stray to his strong, sturdy back.

His lips finally stray from my own then. He doesn't pull away, but dips lower and sends a shiver and a gasp over my being when his lips tenderly kiss my neck a short ways down from my ear. All I can do is clutch desperately at his upper arms as he plants light kisses along my neck.

"S-Syaoran." I breathlessly gasp out his name. I'm putty in his hands even as he pauses his assault on my neck to lift himself up once more, this time not to immediately claim my lips once more. Instead, he looms above me and meets my gaze for the first time. His pupils are dilated, and for the first time, he actually looks both flushed and out of breath.

For the briefest second, something flashes across his face, and I half expect him to pull back and withdraw from me, never to touch me again, let alone ravish me with kisses. What exactly it is, or why it appears are both things I can't decide. He doesn't move, though. He doesn't swoop down again to suppress the sudden sense of dread building up deep within me.

I never get the chance to find out if he really will pull back, though. The two people outside the room make sure of that as the door swings open. I don't see them as they assess the scene in front of them, because not once do I allow my eyes to stray from Syaoran's. There's a treacherously long pause then, in which nobody moves or says anything, too shocked to react. But, given the situation, Terada is still the first in motion.

"Li! Get off of Kinomoto. This is a hospital, not a hotel," he snaps.

Syaoran is pulling away even before Terada has finished speaking. His movements are stiff as he rises back to his feet and takes a few staggered steps away from the me. I push myself upright, legs dangling off the end of the bed. Not once do Syaoran's distraught eyes stray from my own.

"I understand that you two have both been through a lot today, and your judgment might be a bit... clouded, but-"

Syaoran breaks the connection between us as the words sink in. He barely glances at Terada or the nurse on his way out the door.

"Li!" The man doesn't try to stop him, though. Instead, he shakes his head and pinches the bridge of his nose. "Teens these days," he grumbles under his breath before turning to me again.

"Ms. Mizuki is filling out the paperwork for your discharge now, so you need to get ready to go."

I frown, still feeling dazed and lightheaded. "Get ready?"

He nods down at the hospital gown. "You can't wear that out of here." He holds out a stack of cloths to me that I didn't even realize he was carrying. I take it from him and glance it over to find some of the cloths I packed for the trip. "Mizuki had the girls grab you some clothes before we all left."

"Thanks."

Terada nods again and makes his way to the door. "I'll be outside. Come out once you're done and we can head to the lobby. Also, I spoke with your father over the phone, and he's having your brother come down to pick you up early."

_Oh, please tell me he's lying_. Unfortunately for me, his face remains serious, and I am forced to come to terms with my impending death sentence. Touya's never going to let this go. Then again, that's the least of my worries right now.

As Terada follows the nurse out, I realize that for the first time since I got to this dreaded hospital, I'm finally alone. Part of me is grateful for the peace and quite.

Another wishes nothing more than for it to finally be over, because in the isolation, I find my thoughts drifting to things I'm not ready to face yet.

* * *

**It's these darn kiss chapters, I swear. They're the two longest. Last one was like 7.8k, and this one is even worse at exactly 8,045 words in my document. Not the point, though.**

**I really need feedback for this chapter. Like, more than usual. I didn't do a full edit of this chapter, and don't intend to until I get people telling me what they think. If the 'kiss' scene seemed too intense, tell me. It's meant to seem like they're getting caught up in the moment and not caring about anything else, so I'm not going to outright take the entire thing out no matter what, but I thought that maybe the audience would be more comfortable with it if it weren't so intense in terms of suggestive themes. I actually used Terada to try and add some comic relief afterwards. Hopefully that worked...**

**Also, thoughts on the first part: Syaoran's POV. In terms of flow, what did you all think? The beginning part was something I'd written over and over again in both points of view where Sakura woke up at different times and the people there were different. I went with this version, though, and with the way the chapter unfolds, I feel like it fits well, but I want to know if you all thought it moved too fast, or if maybe I should go back and add more detail or emotion.**

**I guess what I'm basically saying is for you guys to review, because I've put a lot into this chapter.**

**Barely started the next chapter, though. Have a beginning and end, but I have since planned out everything that happens from now until the end of the story, so I've gotta change some stuff to match that.**

**Remember: You don't need an account to review.**

**And Happy Presidents Day. Unless you don't live in the states, so you don't have the holiday. In that case... Well... Happy Monday(?). Happy belated Valentines Day to everybody, though.**


	31. Reality is a Relative Term

**Done! Finally! Wow, you must all thought I gave up, didn't you? Well, not quite, I'm afraid. Haha! You've all still got 3 more chapters to endure! That's including this one. But not including the epilogue which I may or may not write. We'll see. Not there just yet.**

**Basic things to be aware of are as follows:**

**1) My editing job is lame. I kinda glanced at it (found really random things, like a random '1' at the end of a paragraph), but it's mostly unedited.**

**2) This is a very choppy chapter. When I say that, I mean that it's kinda all over the place. I'm aware of it, but not sure how to fix it since I need it in order to lead up to the end of the story. Bear with me.**

**3) This is super late, and I'm sorry about that. There are just other things that need the majority of my time because they're really important, plus I've got things going on in my personal life that require my attention. That's just life, though, I guess.**

**Anyways, that's all I need to say before the chapter. So... Yeah, let's goooooo~!**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

I'm standing on a plain. Green grasslands pan out around me. In front of me, I can make out the peaks of mountaintops, one in particular stretching high above all the others like a symbol of its greatness. Behind me, stretched out endlessly on either side, is a beautiful, tranquil forest. High above my head, cumulus clouds are dashed across the azure sky like puffs of cotton candy.

I marvel at the beauty of it all, spinning in circles before finally just stopping to take it in. Then there's a tap on my shoulder. Despite there not being anyone else in the magnificent dreamland, I'm not surprised or startled. As if expecting it, my smile grows and I eagerly turn around.

Behind me stands the most handsome man I've ever seen. His chocolate locks are devilishly messy, yet they've never looked better. Those mesmerizing pools of amber are full of love and happiness as their beholder longingly gazes down at me. And his lips, his captivating lips, turn upward to reveal his pristine white teeth.

He doesn't say anything as he takes my hands and leans down to kiss me chastely on the lips. I don't question it as I smile pleasantly at him after he's pulled back. It just seems natural, as if we've done it our entire lives.

In that moment, everything is perfect. We let ourselves drown in each other's presence. Not once does it cross my mind that this beautiful world I've created will change.

But it does.

The ground beneath my feet suddenly seems to come to life. The sensation of the Earth trembling beneath me sends my panic skyrocketing. Then I'm abruptly pulled away from the one I love as the smooth terrain splits in two. For a moment, I'm gaping down at a never-ending abyss of darkness. Startled by the chasm leering at me, I fumble backwards.

To my horror, the Earth continues to convulse, and the huge break in the land continues to grow as the plain is divided in two.

I hear my name called then. The familiar voice draws my attention back to the person standing equally petrified as myself. I cry out back to him, screaming his name.

Peace has turned to chaos in a mere instant.

The distant mountains, I now realize, were never mere peaks, but rather access points to the Earth's molten core. Clouds of ash and smoke rise from their depths.

Thousands of feet up, the once fluffy, cottony wisps of condensation have transformed into a gray sky that stretches out in every direction, blocking out any rays of sunlight. The millisecond-long flashes that light up the entire sky are followed by the loud clap of thunder. The static electricity in the thinning air leaves the small hairs of my arms rising.

A prickling sensation across my back sends me whipping my head over my shoulder. Behind me, the once tranquil forest has morphed, now covered in thorns and holding a dark eeriness that seems ready to devour any living thing that enters it. Its never-ending sides feel like they're wrapping around on either side of me. The entire forest seems to inch closer and closer, eager to consume me into it's darkness.

I spin around again, daring myself to leap to the other side where my lover is... Only he's gone. Frantic, I whip my head around and scream out to him at the top of my lungs, but am met with nothing but the sound of thunder and the Earth groaning beneath my very feet.

There's nowhere to go. Behind me, a forest of death closes in, and in front of me, glowing, red-hot lava trickles farther and farther down the side of the volcano, burning everything in its path.

I'm trapped. It's then that I realize I'm going to die no matter witch way I choose. There is no safe path.

Then the Earth beneath my feet gives out, and before I have time to move or jump, I'm sent tumbling downward into an endless pit of darkness and despair.

Falling... falling... falling...

* * *

_Thunk_!

I hit the wooden floor with a painful thumping sound. Groaning, I roll over, my sheets still tangled around the lower half of my body. Drawing myself up, I squint at the clock by my bedside.

The numbers 1:38 glow red in the pitch-black room.

_Another nightmare_, I realize. They've been coming to me on and off ever since my close encounter with death. They'll come to me in the middle of the night, waking me up in the worst possible ways, so that when I wake, I'm covered in sweat and shivering from the cold.

Sometimes I'll say in bed for a while until I fall back asleep, since I never have more than one each night.

Other times, I'll clime out of bed and shuffle down the hall to Touya's room. At first he was confused when I came knocking on his door in the middle of the night telling him I had a nightmare, but now he leaves the door unlocked so that I can be more quite when waking him. When he does get up, I'll gently take his hand, and he'll let me guide him back to my room, where he will remain by my side until I've fallen asleep. All the while, he sits on my desk chair and strokes my hair down just like our mother did. Then, in the morning, sometimes I'll find him still there in that chair, dozing off in an awkward and uncomfortable position. More often than not, though, he'll be long gone, and the chair won't even have moved an inch from the desk.

As mad and worried as Touya was when he picked me up from the hospital, he still wasn't able to shun me much more than yelling at me for a while to make sure I understood just how devastated he was. In the end, though, he was more happy that I was alright than he was angry because of my actions. He doesn't try to hard to hide it, either. Not that I'm complaining. After everything, having Touya angry with my would send me plummeting into a state of loss and confusion.

Today, however, I don't go to get my brother like a cowardly child; instead, I pull myself off the ground, untangle myself from my sheets, and remake my bed properly before laying down–atop the covers this time. I don't force my eyes shut, nor do I keep them open against their will. I simply allow my body to decide on its own whether I will get more sleep. Maybe I will, and maybe I won't. All that's left to do is wait.

* * *

**Meiling's POV**

It's been nearly a week since the Tomoeda High senior field trip, and ever since, something has been off about my usually moody and distant cousin. Instead of his typical annoyed response to most of the things I do, he's started to just go along with them. Not in a cheerful open-minded way, though. Oh no–instead, he just agrees without giving the task any thought or enthusiasm.

The other day, I asked him to go shopping with me at the food market, and he went right along with it, simply grabbing his coat and leading the way out the door without even giving me a second glance. All I got was a nod of the head. He doesn't even bother verbally replying! I don't know whether to be irritated by the passive attitude or thankful at his lack of resistance.

Either way, I've had enough of it. So, instinctively, when Wei happens to come innocently walking down the hall while I'm spying on Syaoran in the midst of his daily training, I snag the old man and haul him out of sight as well.

"Wei, I know what you're thinking–that Syaoran's fine, and I'm just over reacting–but there's definitely _something_ off about him!"

"Meiling-sama-"

"I mean, I know that Syaoran and I don't see each other very often... And that we aren't as close as we once were, even though I may act like we are."

Seeing the perplexed look on the ender man's face, I shake my head, and blurt out the rest of what I have to say.

"Wei, I'm telling you, there _has_ to be something wrong with him! Sure, he's always been a bit of an introvert, but this isn't like him. He hasn't spoken more than a handful of words to me within the past week! I think the only reason he does things with me is because he knows if he doesn't, I'll be on him for neglecting me during my visit. I'm supposed to leave in a week, but with the way he's acting, I would really feel way more comfortable if I could stay until he starts to liven up."

"Meiling-sama, I understand where you're coming from, and would gladly give you my intake, but would you kindly let go of me first?"

"Huh? Let go?" Somehow, my hand is still clutching the upper sleeve of his suit. Giggling guiltily, I straighten my fingers and pull my hand away, showing him my palm. "My bad."

He just nods. "I agree that there is something off about Syaoran-sama, but whatever it is, it seems unlikely that he is going to tell either one of us about it."

"So what are we supposed to do? We can't just ignore it. Who knows when he'll get back to acting like his normal self!"

Wei's eyes twinkle. "Meiling-sama, have you spoken of this to the mistress?"

"Um," I frown as I recall my last phone call to my aunt, "yes. I mentioned it in passing, and she seemed interested, so I told her about how he's been acting weirder and weirder the longer I've been here."

"And what did she have to say about the matter?"

"Well, she seemed a little concerned, and told me to keep her up to date on how things are going here."

"Alright." Wei nods thoughtfully. "I'll speak to her and the young master separately and see if perhaps he'll talk to his mother."

"Yeah, good idea. Even if he doesn't want to tell her, he's too scared of her not to!" I smile victoriously, only to receive a disapproving look from the butler. "What?" I shrug. "Everyone knows it's true."

After giving me one last pointed look, Wei shakes his head and makes his way down the hall. He knows it deep down, too, though–even if he won't admit he does.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

Alright, so maybe I should've seen this coming sooner or later. After all, with Meiling here, I can't fake being alright. If it were just Wei, he might turn a blind eye to the odd behavior for a while, or at the very least, not say anything to me unless he was genuinely concerned. But for him to go behind my back and tell my _mother_ is an entirely different story.

It's Meiling's fault, really. That's what I've been told, anyways. Apparently she tipped off my mom, and convinced Wei to voice his concern as well.

None of that matters now, though. Currently, my mother is on the other side of a phone call demanding to know if I'm alright and what has caused the sudden change of behavior that has apparently sent the other two people in the house into an uproar.

"I'm fine, mom. You know Meiling, she worries over every little thing. Whatever she thinks is wrong with me, it's probably just something she's telling herself because she feels neglected."

"I hardly think that's the case, Xiao Lang." Her stern tone and use of my full name make me flinch–something that almost nobody else has the ability to make me do. "Now stop making excuses, and tell me what's going on before you send your poor mother into a state of panic."

I groan and run a hand through my hair as I reply, "Mom-"

"Don't you 'mom' me, young man. I'm your mother. It's my job to worry. It doesn't help that you're so far away from me, either."

"I know," I tell her in a soft and tired voice. "But I'm fine–really. Things have just been kinda crazy around here lately. Sakura and I kinda... hit a rough patch."

"Oh, sweetie. I thought you two were on good terms again."

"We are! Kinda... It's not that we're arguing exactly. Things are just complicated."

"Complicated? Complicated how?"

"Um," I hesitate before admitting, "in the way that I told her I'm in love with her."

There's a long pause followed by the rattling of the phone, and when the shouting comes from the other end, it isn't my mother's voice. "Oh my gosh, is it true, Xiao Lang? Did you really tell that girl how you feel after all of these-hey! Wait! Mo-" There's a struggle on the other end of the phone.

Sounding distracted and irritated, my mother's voice returns saying, "I'm sorry about that, Xiao Lang. Apparently your sister has been outside my office for some time now. I've taken you off speaker now, though, so go on."

I grumble inwardly. "I wish you wouldn't take all your calls that way, especially not when Feimei or Fanren are around. You know those two are master eavesdroppers."

"Xiao Lang!" she scolds. "They are still your older sisters, and you are to respect them."

It's a good thing she isn't here to see me roll my eyes.

"Now please explain what you said. You told the girl you're in love with her? After everything that happened, you still have feelings for this girl?"

"I do," I state firmly.

There's a sigh on the other end, and she says softly, "Well, I can't say it comes as much of a surprise. She has always been able to affect you in ways nobody else could."

"You're not disappointed?"

"Disappointed? No. If that child is anything like she once was, I have nothing to be disappointed about. Worried is what I am. She was the cause of your depression and the reason you refuse to stay in Hong Kong with your family."

"Mom, I've told you Sakura isn't the reason-"

"Yes, yes, I know," she says, cutting me off. "Now, tell me, what exactly has happened? Did she reject your feelings?"

"No, it's more complicated than that. Look, mom, I'm really not comfortable-"

"Don't try to tell me you aren't comfortable talking about it with your old mother. I want an explanation, and I want it now. Otherwise, I'm sending one of your sisters over there to investigate for me."

I cringe, but give in. There's no use fighting it, after all. In the end, I tell her everything–well, almost everything–that's gone on over the past few weeks.

Once I've finished explaining my situation, there's a long silence before my mother speaks.

"So that's how it is."

Not knowing how to reply, I remain silent.

"Alright, Xiao Lang, I know this must all be very confusing for you, but no matter what happens, you need to respect her decision. You also have to figure out if you can still be by her side as just a friend if she does end up not returning your feelings."

"I know... Look, mother, I really need to go. Our school is holding a festival this weekend, so they need as many helping hands as they can get."

"I see... Well, I'll let you go then."

I'm about to pull the phone away when I hear my mother's voice call out, "But before you go..."

"What is it?"

She sighs heavily. "Please, don't let this be a repeat of what happened when you two were younger. I don't ever want to see you like that again, Xiao Lang. It was hard enough to bear the first time around seeing you in that much pain and sorrow."

"Mom..."

I wish I were in front of her. She tries to act like she kept it together when I was depressed all those years ago, but I know how much it affected her and her work. Late at night, she would come and check on me when she thought I was asleep. She would just sit there on the side of my bed stroking my head or rubbing my back for a while before finally kissing the top of my head and leaving.

"It won't be. I promise... I really need to go now."

"Alright. I love you, Xiao Lang."

"I love you, too, mom. Bye."

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

"Tomoyo, where did you put the orange paint?"

The beautiful head of violet locks rises from the costume stitching to face me. "The orange? Naoko came over earlier to asked for some paint since her class ran out, but I'm not sure if I gave her the orange."

"Alright, I'll go check."

"Okay. But, wait, Sakura! If she doesn't have it, check down the hall in the supply room, because someone might have put it back already."

"Got it. I'll be back soon. Oh, and can you make sure nobody touches the banner until I get back? Thanks."

Leaving the room, I make my way next-door to 3-A. The entire school is in a state of panic as we make last minute preparations for the school festival we're having this weekend. It's an annual event we hold to celebrate the finishing of the building's construction twenty years ago. The time of year isn't exactly ideal for a school festival, but most of the students really get into it and go all out.

As for me, I enjoy getting to make banners and signs that allow me to show my creativity, even if it is just to display information about my class's event. This year we're doing an indoor café theme, since doing a play was out of the question and nobody was thrilled about the idea of setting up outside.

Upon entering 3-A, I spot Naoko right away and make my way to her.

"Oh, hey, Sakura," Naoko greets me, looking up from the papers she's filling out in the front of the class room. "Sorry, I didn't see you come in. Can I help you with something?"

"That depends." I stand across the podium from her and look around the room to investigate for any signs of paint. "I'm trying to track down the can of orange paint, and Tomoyo said she might've given it to you. Any clues?"

"Ah, that. I actually was getting it for class C. They ran out and couldn't find any more in the supply room."

"Figures," I mutter.

Naoko giggles, and offers, "Do you want me to come with you to look for it? I need to check in on the other classes anyways. Student council work," she informs me, holding up a clipboard.

"Sure." As we make our way out of the room, I ask, "So, what's your class doing this year? Something spectacular, I'm sure."

"Ha! Not quite. I wanted to do a haunted house theme, but apparently the freshmen have been battling it out with each other for that one, so we're stuck with doing a survey."

"Wow, really? That sounds awful. I mean-"

"No, you're right. Not much to do about it now, though. Hopefully we get a better option in the spring."

I just nod and follow her in as we reach 3-C where the door has been left open for all of the people coming and going. Inside, the desks are all pushed up against the back wall of the room and most of the students are huddled in groups holding scrips and reading off of them as they memorize the words.

"I didn't know they were doing a play," I say in fascination.

"Yeah. It's parody of _The Tale of the Bamboo Cutter_, apparently." Naoko's attention is pulled away as she spots the group making the decorations. "That's them."

I move to follow her into the room, glancing around as I do so, only to be stopped short as three familiar figures catch my attention in the back of the room. "Um, Naoko, do you mind if I..." It just takes a glance at where I'm pointing for Naoko nod and motion for me to go ahead. I smile thankfully and move towards the far corner of the room.

As I make my way closer, each step I take seems to accelerate my heart rate until it feels like there's a hummingbird in my chest. My eyes, no matter how hard I try, won't stray from the messy chocolate locks of hair slowly growing nearer and nearer. A few feet away, I stop, unable to bring myself to take the last few steps. It's at that moment that the chocolate locks sway and the person's head turns.

At first glance, he looks the same as he always does. His hair is still unkempt, yet devilishly handsome. His uniform still looks spotless and ironed. His jaw still sets in the same stiff, locked position it always does when he's not talking or smiling. If I didn't know him, I doubt I would notice any changes. There's an unmistakable difference in his eyes, though. They still shine a brilliant shade of amber, but they seem less lively and alert than usual. Tired, maybe.

Before I have a chance to put my finger on it, there's a voice that cuts into my thoughts.

"Sakura!" The second Chiharu says my name, the head turns again, and all I can see is the back of it. "Oh my gosh, I haven't seen you in forever!" She jumps up out of her chair and runs over to give me a hug. "I meant to stop by your house sometime, but never got a chance." Her arms around me vanish as she pulls away. "Um... Sakura?"

"Hm?" I finally redirect my attention. Chiharu watches me with confused and mildly concerned eyes.

"Are you still not feeling great? You seem out of it."

"I'm fine," I assure her softly.

"Well, alright. Anyways, what brings you to 3-C? Trying to get a sneak peak of the play?"

My eyes wander back to the splotch of dark hair over Chiharu's shoulder.

"No, I'm trying to track down the orange paint can."

At that moment, Naoko appears from nowhere saying, "They say that they already put it back in the supply room. You should probably go grab it before somebody else does. Seems like it's in high demand."

Forcing my eyes to Naoko, I flash a small smile and say, "'kay, thanks. I'll grab it in a minute."

Naoko raises an eyebrow, but turns to go, mentioning her work for the student council. When she's gone, I allow my eyes to fall back to where they naturally wish to go. This time, Chiharu follows my gaze, and a sparkle of understanding shines in her eyes. Before I know it, she's saying, "Hey, Li, do you mind helping Sakura for me? I'll take over with Takashi."

Finally, he turns fully around. First he looks at Chiharu, then his eyes meet mine.

_Tired_, I silently agree with myself. And almost reluctant or sad.

"Sure." He turns away again and hands the small booklet he's holding over to Yamazaki. "Let's go," he says, not even looking at me. I have to nearly run after him to keep up.

Once we're in the hall, he waits a moment longer before deciding to ask, "How have you been feeling?"

At first, I'm not sure how to reply. _Confused. Stressed. Worried._

"Since you were discharged," he adds, making me want to smack myself.

"Better. You'd never have guessed I was in the hospital to begin with."

"Well, that's good to hear."

_Yeah. It's great,_ I think to myself. The tension–to me, at least–is so thick, a knife could slice right through it. Syaoran is able to maintain his cool and calm demeanor, whereas I'm as stressed and awkward as I always get when I don't know how to act around him.

"You're getting the orange, right?"

I glance over at him, then make note of the door we're standing in front of. "Yeah." We move into the room and make our way to the paint. Part of me wants to say something like _why didn't you call me_, but the self-conscious, somewhat proud part of me keeps me silent. All I do is watch as he studies the cans of paint for the right color.

He stops at one in particular, and asks, "Is this it?"

I glance at the can and nod. I go to reach for it next, but Syaoran shakes his head, mumbling, "I've got it," under his breath. Then, paint can in hand, he turns and heads back to the door. Once again, I have to rush after him not to be left behind, but he suddenly stops short at the door. I'm forced to stagger a few steps back just to avoid running face-first into him.

"Why did you-" As I meet his gaze, I don't need to continue. Syaoran's eyes boar into me with a need to say or do something, but he from the looks of it, he isn't sure how to put it in words. I wait anxiously for him to say something while he looks at me, then away, then runs his free hand through his hair before looking at me all over again.

I want to say something, too, but find myself in a similar bind as Syaoran. After what happened, there are a million things to be said, but it's how to say them that is the problem.

Finally, he stops and looks directly at me for a good while, then announces, "It should never have happened. You know that, right?"

I open my mouth to speak, but nothing comes out, so Syaoran continues.

"Sorry if I'm being blunt, but I really need to get this out there. What happened in the hospital was a mistake, and I'm sorry I didn't realize that sooner. I should've pulled away, not encouraged you."

I stare up at him for a while, before saying in a idiotic tone, "But you... You did pull away."

"Not soon enough. It went _way_ too far. You have to know that. Nothing like that can ever happen again, at least not as we are now."

I feel as though I've been struck my his words. My arms snake their way around my torso as though they can protect me from the ache caused by Syaoran's words. Looking away in shame, I manage to get out in a small voice, "Do I disgust you?"

"_Disgust_ me?" He sounds as if he's in awe from the proposition. I can see him shift from the corner of my eye, clearly frustrated. "Are you really asking me that?"

"You're acting like what I did was something grotesque!"

"That's because it's not just about what happened! I'm being this way, because of what could've happened had I not pulled away, had we not been interrupted! I can't always control myself when I'm around you. Impulse is going to be the death of me. It's something I want to control, but I need you to understand and help me so that I can. I don't want to hurt you, Sakura. I don't want to hurt _either_ of us."

He finally stops, and I bring my eyes back to meet his. His face softens as they do, and he heaves a heavy sigh. "Please, try to understand," he says more softly this time. "I'm trying to do the same as well, but you're a mystery to me sometimes. If I knew what you were thinking, maybe things would be easier for us." He shakes his head. "Forget it. As for what happened at the hospital, you'd just been through a near-death experience. Neither of us was thinking straight, and we were both doing and saying things we wouldn't normally. It was a mistake, so let's just put it behind us. One incident of irrationality and impulse shouldn't ruin what we have. We're friends. I don't want anything to ruin that. Do you agree?"

All I can do is manage a stiff nod.

_No,_ I want to say. _I don't want to forget about it, or pretend it didn't happen. I thought it meant something, or at least that it could. I meant all the things I said and did._

But I don't say anything. I remain silent as Syaoran nods his approval, lifts up that can of paint and says, "Good. Now, let's go get this paint back to the room before someone comes looking for it."

And then he goes, leaving me in the dark, cold room with nothing to do but gawk at the empty doorway, wondering how I ever let such a thing happen, before finally stumbling after him down the hallway and back to reality.

The students are still working. Tomoyo is still in her desk, working on the costume designs. And Syaoran still seems as far away as he was the day he walked out of that hospital room.

Nothing has changed. I'm the only one stuck at a permanent stand-still.

There's a door before me now. It stands between myself and the world of wonders beyond. A bright, magnificent world full of color, life, and love. It has rolling hills with ups and downs, and a few patches of mud here and there, so it might get a little mucky and unclean at times. But despite the few little quirks here and there that may have some throwing in the towel and turning back, it has a view that is to die for. One just has to be open enough to see it.

That world is so close for me. I could reach out and touch it if not for the single locked door that prevents me from going too far. That day at the hospital, I tried to force my way into that world by using an alternative path. A ridiculous feat, really, as I already hold the key in my hand. I'm just not ready to use it.

And what scares me is that I never will be.

* * *

**See what I did there? (Smiles with self-pride) I tried to use a metaphor. Gotta start incorporating those literary elements to add a deeper meaning. Hopefully they make sense and don't seem completely random. I'm mainly talking about the door thing. I'll be going back to it.  
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**Okay, so for anyone out there who has an account, I have a question. What happens to the comments when a chapter is deleted? Like, if someone reviewed this chapter, then I deleted it, would the comment disappear, too? Now, nobody panic, I'm not going to delete a bunch of chapters, this is just so that once I've finished the story, and I go back to re-edit it, if I want to combine chapters, I don't accidentally delete a bunch of comments. I'll probably ask this question again in future chapters for anyone who doesn't read it here.  
**

**There are two more chapters left for me to write as of this point in time, but you all know me by now. I'll start writing one and have to cut it in half. I did it with this chapter, too. Next chapter should easily be one, but I'm not sure about the last. After that, I'm thinking about an epilogue, but am also cowering away from it, which I shouldn't do since I've put so much into this. The epilogue may come post-edit, as in after I do the final edit where I go back and re-do/alter/improve all the previous chapters. That's going to take a really long time, though. Probably won't get to it until the summer.**

**Getting late, so I should be off. Please read the author's notes here at the end. Important stuff. Not so important that I'm going to underline, but still important. I'll save underlining until a little later for affect.**

**Bye! Have a good week, everyone!**


	32. Festivity is Overshadowed by Reality

**I LIVE! And have had issue uploading this document. Had to log off and then back on. Weird.  
**

**Anyways, sorry it's been so long, guys. Because it has been like forever. I don't even remember... That's a lie. I do remember what happened last time. Kinda had to go back to refresh myself while writing this chapter. Which, by the way, is seriously in need of love. From me. I'm off my game. It's not looking very good. Kinda choppy. Especially near the start. Not sure how much better the next chapter will be. By the way, there will now be two more. That's what I've decided.**

**If anyone was actually wondering why I was gone so long, I assure you that I didn't abandon you all. Well, I kinda did, but I never forgot. I was focusing my energy on my studies since the year was drawing to a close. And now it's taking me forever to get back into the swing of things. When I get back to my normal writing self, I'm going to have some serious editing to do. For now, though, I'll let you have this so that you know what's happening to the characters you've gotten to know super well (hopefully) over the past 31 chapters.**

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

The day of the festival arrives sooner than I anticipate. Ever since my run-in with Syaoran, I've been dreading it. Facing him is inevitable, though, so as I finish tying my uniform in place and step out through the curtain partition separating the classroom, I walk straight up to the brunette with my head held high to mask my insecurity.

"How's it coming along out here? Has anyone shown up yet?"

Syaoran lifts his head from the task of pouring glasses of water. He meets my gaze, then glances down at the outfit I've just finished tugging into place.

"What?" I look down at myself, inspecting for obvious flaws. "Did I put it on wrong?"

Syaoran's head snaps up again, his eyes startled. "No!" he blurts out. I raised my eyebrows. He glances away and clears his throat. "Sorry, no. It's perfect. Daidouji did a magnificent job as usual. As for the customers, there are only two tables taken right now."

I open my mouth to ask if I can help, but he beats me to it. "They're already being waited on." He must see the disappointment on my face, because he adds, "Don't worry, the festival only officially opened half an hour ago. People are still making their way through the outdoor stalls. We'll have more customers show up the later in the day it gets."

I sigh and lean back against the table behind me. "Yeah, I guess so. Hey, do known when 3-C is starting their class play?"

"Not a clue. Takashi said something about it starting later, though. I think around noon, maybe."

"Darn. During the lunch rush. Figures." Pushing off from the table, I silently pull the curtain aside to see into the seating area and let it fall before asking, "Where's Tomoyo?"

"Off with Hiiragizawa still, probably. He swung by before you got here and they left to see some of the stalls before it gets too crowded."

I walk back over to him. "You seem to be in the know today. Where's Rika?"

"Sasaki and one of the other students are outside the room waiting for customers to seat."

"And you're all alone back here pouring water? Where is everybody?"

"Well, there are two girls doing the waiting right now, and there was someone else back here who left to grab the ice out of the fridge in the teacher's lounge."

"That's it? Did everyone else abandon ship, or something? How come there are so few people?"

Syaoran sets down the pitcher of water. "Relax, Sakura. Most people are just enjoying the festival right now while it's still early. Daidouji mentioned that she already had a few of our classmates go down and advertise the café. They'll start to show up as it gets more crazy down there. It's no reason to start panicking, okay?"

I sigh. "Yeah, I know."

"Then can you please stop shifting like that. You're starting to stress _me_ out."

I freeze. "Sorry, but I don't know what to do."

"How about for now you just go and put the water out on the tables for me."

"Sure. Water. I can do that." After releasing a final puff of air, I grab a tray, fill it up with the glasses, and step out into the seating area of the classroom.

Just as Syaoran has said, two of our female classmates are waiting the tables, one shadowing the other.

As I set down the glasses, more people begin to appear. Rika waves to me as she leads them into the room. This general procedure continues for about an hour or so. I wait tables, Rika comes in to seat the people, and we both exchange looks and small gestures from across the room to signal our boredom. Every time I go into the back, which becomes increasingly crowded the later it gets, I try not to be obvious while starting at Syaoran.

By the time Tomoyo and Eriol finally come strolling into the back of the classroom, it's already half past noon, and the seating area is nearly full.

"Tomoyo! Thank goodness you're here! We're painstakingly understaffed."

Tomoyo, still on a high from her outing with her boyfriend, grins at me as if nothing in the world could bring her down. "No worries, Sakura. I'll go get changed now and then we can wait on tables together! By the way, you look adorable in that outfit!"

I ignore the fact that she used _me_ as her model when designing the uniforms, and usher her into the changing area. "Thank you. Please hurry."

Just as she's about to close the curtain behind her, I grab it and lean into the tiny space. "And Tomoyo? Please don't leave me alone today. I have this knot in my stomach like there's something coming."

Tomoyo's eyes flash with a brief panic, then change to understanding. "Sure, Sakura. I promised Eriol we'd dance when they start the bonfire, but I'm completely yours until then. Sound good?"

"Yes. Thank you, Tomoyo."

She giggles, then waves her hand for me to go. "Now let me get changed before we're overrun with angry customers."

I laugh. Tomoyo always knows what to say to cheer me up.

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

When I eventually find Sakura, she's with Daidouji. She's changed out of the cafe outfits Daidouji designed and is in her every-day uniform once more. As beautiful as I thought she looked in the dress, her figure illuminated by the bonfire in the simple outfit makes her even more magnificent.

Eriol appears from behind Daidouji, taking her hand and gesturing to the bonfire where pairs dance around the rising flames. Daidouji casts a glance at Sakura, who smiles and waves her hand for her friend to go ahead. Then she stands alone, watching the others from afar.

I approach her slow and silent, stopping far enough away not to alert her of my presence. Music hums around the courtyard making many of the others bob their heads or tap their feet. Sakura stands still, the only movement coming from the breeze that sends her hair fluttering against her face. Then she lifts her arm to brush it away, and turns. Her eyes meet mine immediately. Of all the things I expect her to do, she continues to surprise me. A faint smile pulls gently at the edges of her lips. In that instant, I can see calm and pure fondness in her eyes.

Before I can second guess myself, I hold out a hand to her. "Dance with me?"

The smile gradually falls from Sakura's face and is replaced with a troubled expression.

"It's just a dance," I assure her.

There's one final moment of hesitation before she reaches out and places her hand atop my own.

"You know I can't dance, right?"

"It will be fine. My mother taught me how to dance, after all."

"Really?"

"Yes. It was a mere ten plus years ago. Which coincidentally happens to also be when I last put the skill to use."

"Are you sure this is such a good idea? I'll probably end up stepping on your feet."

"Then I'll do my best to avoid yours."

And then we're dancing. I guide her to the others, take her other hand, and suddenly that's all there is. As we move together, I imagine we must look clumsy to others, but from where I'm standing, we're absolutely perfect.

Sakura's face is illuminated by the burning embers around us, giving her an iridescent glow. It contrasts the solemn light given off as the moonlight hit her face that day in the ocean. Back then she wasn't glowing at all, not the way she is right now. She's never seemed so alive to me.

"You're radiant." As I say the words, I realize how true they are.

Sakura's smile falters. She doesn't look sure how to respond. It's similar to her behavior when I first asked her to dance and leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. "Syaoran," she struggles for the words. "Please don't..."

"I'm not giving up, you know."

The claim jolts her. She freezes mid-step and gawks at me.

"On you," I clarify.

"But the other day-" she stutters.

"The other day I was trying to make sure you didn't mistake gratitude or impulse for love. I want to be with you, but only if it's for the right reasons."

This silences her, then she takes hold of my hand and pulls me out of the circle of people and towards the forgotten building. As we near the entrance, she turns to me and lifts her head, finally showing me her face. It's full of anguish.

"I need to talk to you privately. Wait a few minutes and then come to the art room. Please. It's important, Syaoran."

From her tone and expression, I don't have even the slightest thought to doubt her, so I nod. She wastes no time before making her way swiftly into the building, leaving me to stare after her and wonder what could be going on to cause such a reaction from her.

When I open the door to the art room several minutes later, Sakura is standing in front of one of several easels. Each one, with the exception of the one she's looking at, has a tarp over it. I'm almost tempted to ask if she's taking them all home, but decide better of it as she spots me and immediately swings her arms up. The white sheet in her hands flutters and then glides down around the last painting.

"Do you remember after the bonfire how I told you that there was something I needed to talk to you about when we got back? It might not be the ideal time, but I don't think I can go any longer without saying anything."

"I'm listening." As I cross the room, she lowers herself onto one of the stools and waits while I pull up another and sit down, giving her my full attention. "What is it you want to talk about?"

"Well... Distance to put it plainly."

I raise my eyebrows curiously. "Distance?"

"Yeah." Sakura intertwines her fingers. "To an extent. I've already mentioned it to you on New Year's Eve."

Memories from the first time I kissed her begin to bubble up, but I shove them back to focus on what she's saying. It was a long day, and we talked about a lot of things. What did we talk about that related to...

_Distance_.

And then I understand. And I wish briefly that I didn't.

"Why are you bringing this back up now?" My voice comes out more on-edge than I mean for it to. My entire body remains stalk still, my head down.

Sakura brings her hands closer to her body. "I think you might know why. Even if you don't want to admit it."

"Tell me."

"Syaoran..."

"Tell me!" I startle even myself, and quickly lift my head to Sakura. She blinks a few times at the abrupt change in my voice. "Sorry," I whisper. "Please, explain what you mean."

She takes a deep breath and then goes on. "Even if I'm able to return your feelings, Syaoran, we can't be together."

I have to allow myself a moment to calm down and think over her words. Of all the situations I played out in my head, this was not one.

Wait. Did she say-

"If?"

"What?"

"You said, 'Even if I'm able to return your feelings...' Did you not?"

"I-Yes, I said that. What difference does that-"

"So do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Love me!"

Sakura is abruptly silent for a moment, starting at me wide-eyed. Then she turns away, and says quietly and almost frustratedly, "What difference does it make?"

"It makes a huge difference, Sakura! If you don't love me, then none of this matters, but if you do, then-"

"Then what, Syaoran? You stay here in Japan to be with me, and ignore your entire future? Take me with you to Hong Kong so that I never get to see the father I just reunited with and the brother who raised me? Or were you thinking more along the lines of an indefinite relationship of us being on different land masses?"

"Is that really how you see it?"

"Yes! It is, and do you want to know why? Because I'm being practical."

"No, what you're being is a coward."

"If trying to protect the people I care about makes me a coward, then I could say the same to you. You never even asked me about why I kissed you. You just assumed that my judgment was clouded and that I didn't have the slightest clue what I was doing."

"Are you trying to tell me something right now?"

"I'm trying to tell you that if I didn't have feelings for you, do you really think I would've been so liberal with my actions? Do you think that had it been Yamazaki or Eriol, that I still would've-"

"No, of course not. That isn't what I meant. I meant that you were confused."

"Confused? I was no more confused then than I was that day in the park."

"That day in the park..." I stop. That day in the park that I almost kissed her. Before I told her I loved her. And she _didn't push me away_.

Silenced, I can do nothing but stare at her. _Is she trying to say what it sounds like she is?_ I've never stopped before to look for any signs. I've thought before that maybe... But it was impossible. Her actions sometimes are misleading, but that's just the way she is, right? Whenever she leans a little too close, or stares a little too intently, those are things she does because I'm her friend, and we've been through a lot together. Isn't it? Sure. I mean, that's always what I've thought.

But is it? Is it really _just_ because we're close friends? Was everything she's done been because we're friends, or was some of it because she sees me as something more? The more I think about it, the less sure I become.

My eyes stray from her and move across the room. White ghosts stand upon wooden feet everywhere my eyes go. It's unusual. She demanded I come up here and was in a rush, but she had me wait at the entrance so that she could come up first. Almost as an afterthought. Like there was a painting that she didn't want me to see.

"_Paintings_." My lips curve to form the word while my eyes shift across the different covered works throughout the room. "Have you ever painted me?"

"W-What?"

"Besides the one I've already seen, have you ever painted me?"

"I... No."

I look back at her. She's lying. Her eyes go from me, to the floor, then up to something across the room. When I follow her gaze, it just confirms my guess. I look at her again, and our eyes lock. There's a tension which breaks as soon as Sakura breaths out in defeat the word, "Yes."

"Why?"

Quietly–so quiet that I almost don't hear her–she explains, "I paint the things that cause me pain as well as the things that bring me happiness."

"Which category do I fall under?"

Her eyes dart between mine almost like she's unsure of the answer herself. "Both."

We sit like that for a while more, just studying the other. I can't allow myself to stay quiet, though. I've come to learn more about her feelings for me in the past ten minutes than I have in the entire two weeks since I confessed to her.

"Sakura, I told you before that I wouldn't pressure you on this topic, but something tells me you already know the answer, so please answer me honestly. Can you promise me that?"

From her expression, it seems she's already guessed what I'm about to ask. She nods slowly.

Taking a deep breath, and bracing myself for whatever reply I'm left with, I allow the words to pass my lips for a second and final time. "Do you love me?"

There's no hesitation. No second guessing. All there is is the gentle softness of her breathing out the word, "Yes."

It makes my heart pound in a way that only she can do.

It doesn't feel real. After years of being near her... After learning about what I missed in the past... But this is the present. And now she's sitting just a few feet away telling me that _yes_, she does love me. Yet it doesn't feel right. It's so simple and so abrupt...

"Are you sure?"

She seems baffled by the question at first, then her eyes abruptly narrow and her fists clench. Rising to her feet and glaring down at me, she angrily bites out, "Of course I'm _sure_. I know what my feelings are, Syaoran. How can you even ask me that?"

"Why are you so angry?" I defend.

She twists back in my direction. "Because I'm finally able to tell you that I love you, and you're asking me if I'm _sure_! I've been _sure_ for months!"

_Months?_ I ask myself. Calmer now, I dare to ask, "Why did you never say anything?"

This actually makes her hesitate. She shifts her weight, and crosses her arms protectively across her body. "I was already in love with you once before, remember? That time I didn't even have to tell you how I felt for you to break my heart. I hadn't intended to tell you this time around, either."

My mouth snaps shut. I slump dejectedly forward on the stool, and stare down at the tile below our feet. "Sakura..." I try desperately to think of something to say to make her understand that will help me to understand as well. "I told you, though. After I told you how I felt, why wouldn't you?" I lift my face, begging her for an explanation. "Were you just going to let me think that you could never love me again after what I did to you when we were children?"

"No! That was never my intention, Syaoran. I didn't want to tell you, because-" She stops short.

"Why?"

"Forget it." She shakes her head, and walks towards the window. It's something she's done to me too many times before. She starts to say something, but then stops like she thinks I can't handle it or that I'll be mad at her for thinking it.

"Tell me, Sakura."

Finally, she looks back at me, locks eyes, and snaps. "I didn't want to tell you because I was afraid if I did, everything would change!"

Her explanation baffles me. "Isn't that a good thing? If I love you, and you love me, then isn't change a good thing?"

"No! How could it be when everything is going to end soon? You keep on forgetting, Syaoran! No matter what, we can't be together!"

"Why? After all this time, can't you at least give me–_us_–a chance?" I rise to my feet and step up to her, being as gentle and loving as I can as I rest my hand on her clenched fist. "I won't lose you a second time. You can be sure of that. I'll never hurt you again."

She jerks away from me. "You won't have a choice! Think about it for a minute! How do you see this playing out? We start dating for a few month, getting even closer than we already are so that when you leave–and you _will_ leave–it'll be that much more painful? I don't want that! I don't want to watch you leave any more than you want to go."

"Are you telling me that you won't even give me a chance? Just because eventually we'd have to have a long distance relationship?"

"Try to really think about it. Long distance relationships aren't easy as it is, but what makes it that much harder is that you still have to go to college after we graduate. And then you're going to be doing whatever it is you'll do in your family business. You won't have time to fuss over some girl who's over a thousand miles away."

A spike of irritation has me frowning down at her. "You've really thought this through, haven't you? Without even saying a word to me, you decided we have no future; is that it?"

"Don't say it like that! I'm not trying to be the bad guy here! I'm trying to protect both of us."

"You don't need to. It's not like I'm asking you to marry me. What I want is for you to take a chance. Is that really so hard for you to understand?"

"I understand, Syaoran, but I can't. I'm sorry, but I just can't." She backs even farther away from me and turns so that I can't see her face.

A miserable part of me knows what it means, but I'm too distracted to listen at first. We're so close to each other now. I could reach out and nearly reach her. So close. She continues to elude me, though. Even now. Even when she loves me the same way that I love her, I still can't have her by my side.

She's wrong about everything. I want to tell her so. She doesn't care, though. She won't listen, no matter how much I pour my heart out to her. What hurts the most is that even though she says it's distance separating us, I can't help but feel there's something more.

"So that's it... There's nothing I can say to change your mind?"

Her auburn locks fall around her face when she looks down. She's given me her answer. My mother was right. While I might not like Sakura's decision, I have to respect it. After all, she's the person I've chosen to love.

"I'll leave you alone, then." As I'm turning to go, I stop. After this, we'll have to go back to just being friends, but before that happens, there's one last thing I need to do.

I reach out and rest my hands on her shoulders, then gently press my lips to her forehead. "I love you, Sakura. Please, don't ever forget that."

I can't bring myself to look at her as I leave the room. Outside, people continue to cheer and celebrate all around. Frustration devours me. The aching in my chest is something else, though.

The walk back to my apartment I spend trying to ignore the way my body is acting in defiance to everything I do.

When I open the door and enter my small home, Meiling is already there to greet me. "Syaoran!" She lunges for me and wraps her arms around my own. "How was the festival? Did you have fun?"

I shrug her off. "Not now, Meiling. I don't feel well. I'm just going to go straight to bed. Tell Wei I got in alright."

The first thing I do when I reach my room is fall back onto the mattress. I've never felt so overwhelmingly tired. Nor have I ever wished for something more than I do right now wishing I could think of anything but the one girl who continues to monopolize my thoughts.

* * *

**That's it. Don't hurt me, please. I know it's short. And you're probably pissed about what happened. I'm actually kicking myself as well right now. I'd like to have been able to handle it differently. That's what editing is for, though. This is just the rough draft. In fact, the entire story is a rough draft, really. I mean, it's the first time I'm writing it. Only get better by rewriting and learning what can be done to make it better. So if you're reading the chapter, I'm gonna need feedback if you've got the time and the ideas. Next chapter is going to focus on Sakura, by the way. In case you were wondering.**

**Oh, and you guys. Maybe nobody cares, but SPOILERS: After Djokavic won the Wimbledon final for this year (2015), he met Benedict! As in Benedict Cumberbatch who's Sherlock in BBC's Sherlock, as well as Smaug in the Hobbit movies, and Khan in Star Trek! Plus other things, I'm sure, but I haven't seen those... Or at least don't remember seeing them. Not the point. I think my brain exploded when it happened. So great. Oh, and before that, right after he won, Djokavic ate some of the grass. Oh my gosh, it was the funniest thing. They even asked him about it. So great. Up top to all my tennis fans out there. Unless you were rooting for Federer, in which case, sorry. But he did win like 7 times already. I counted. On the wall.**

**Okay, enough tennis stuff. I've gotta go. And work on the next chapter. I think the way I've ended this just made it like ten times harder to start the next... Well, with the way I had wanted to. Ugh. But I can't hold off on updating. Oh well. When I do the edit, this is all going to come out way better, you guys, I promise.**

**I'll see you in a few weeks. Hopefully two. Or less. Let's shoot for that.**


	33. An Unexpected Call

**I totally half-assed the editing this time. Didn't finish it, honestly. I'm just really done today. I had a rough day, so I'm just going to give you guys the unedited version. Sorry if there are mistakes in it.**

**This chapter isn't mean to be fluffy. It's more about the plot. I'm trying to wrap this project up, so we've gotta have some conclusion stuff going on here. Very important. Plus, this is going to bring into play some things I've foreshadowed in previous chapters. In addition it contains even more foreshadowing. Start making all your guesses now. Oh, and by foreshadowing, I don't just mean about Sakura and Syaoran's relationship. I'm talking about smaller details.**

**Anyways, bear with me while you're reading this. The beginning is written a certain way (you'll see) and that wasn't originally what I was going to do, but I decided to leave it for both time as well as to show you how distant Sakura is. Then she comes back and is yelling across that house at Touya. Transitions. Gotta love em.**

* * *

** Sakura's POV**

When I was young, long before I ever met the Chinese boy who would one day steal my heart, my mother told me stories of when she met dad, and how they fell in love. It was a scandalous relationship because she was a student at the university he taught at. That didn't stop them, though. Even when the board found out about it, the two of them fought in order to save my father's job and my mother's reputation.

In the end, they were both let off with a warning since my mother was so close to graduating. It was less than a year after she finished school that my dad proposed, and a few months later, they were married.

I always found the story to be beautiful and inspirational because they were willing to fight for each other. Every time my mother spoke of it, I thought to myself how nice it would be if one day I found someone like that myself. A person who would do anything to be with me, and I, in return, would do the same. That idealistic point of view didn't become real, though. When push came to shove, I was the one who couldn't fight. Despite finding the person I always dreamt of who was prepared to fight and potentially suffer on my behalf. To be with _me_, the coward that isn't even able to try and be with the person she loves because of fear.

After seven years of being in love, I finally found the key to my own happiness. Being the fool I am, I held onto it for a while, and just when there was the perfect time to use it, I threw it away fearing the unknown world that might lie beyond the door.

Young, cowardly Sakura chose the easy way out. She chose not to fight.

And as Syaoran strides over to the pathetic, weak version of myself that I despise with all my being, so close that I can feel my breath repel off of his chest, I'm forced to accept that I can't reach out to him. Even when he rests his hands on my shoulders and places a gentle, fleeting kiss to the top of my head, I remain stock still.

"I love you, Sakura. Please, don't ever forget that."

Then he's gone, and my body reacts despite my will, reaching out for him. My conscious takes over in time to stop short, knowing that there's nothing I can say or do that will magically change things. It was my decision to do this, so I have to see it through. For both of us.

It's for the best.

* * *

When I get home that night, all I have the strength to do is collapse against the inside of the door, and curl in on myself. There are no tears left form me to cry. I just stare at the hard wood floor panels, looking at them, but not really _seeing_ them. What happened during the past few months that led me here?

My dad finds me like that not too long after. He kneels down beside me and asks if I'm alright.

I tell him I don't know. Because, in truth, I really don't. All I know is that it hurts, and I can't imagine the pain ever going away.

He rubs my back and asks me what happened.

I tell him about my friend who I love more than I've ever loved anyone. And I tell him how I hurt that person, because all I'm able to do is push that person away in the hope of protect both of us.

My dad asks me why I can't be with this person if he means that much to me.

I explain that I'm afraid of hurting him, because soon we won't be able to see each other anymore. The boy and I live far, far apart, and I believe it will be a burden and pain to try and be together when we're so far apart. Our homes are thousands of miles apart.

And then my father tells me a story. He talks about my mother and how any amount of time together, even if they weren't by each other's sides again, would be more than enough for him. Just to be able to talk to her and see her again. "Sometimes it takes a leap of faith to find the greatest things in life. The greatest things in life don't come easy. Perhaps you decide to tell this boy how you feel and you two are separated but remain a couple. For some, long distance relationships don't work. That might be the case for you and this boy, but wouldn't you rather give it a shot at least to know for sure and not have any regrets?"

Everything he says sways me. It sounds so alluring. But I can't think. I can't even toy with the possibility right now. I just broke the heart of the person I love. I need to think. To breath. To process what has happened and what is going to happen next.

It's too much. Just let me rest. Let me accept this fate I've brought upon myself.

Time. I need _time_.

* * *

The phone rings at noon.

I remain firmly seated on the couch watching the pictures on the television wiz by. "Touya! Phone!"

Somewhere farther off in the house my brother's voice comes echoing back. "You get it for once! You've been sitting on that couch watching TV all morning!"

"I don't have to work this weekend. I'm entitled to sit on the couch all morning if I want to!"

The phone continues to blare loudly from it's spot perched on the countertop.

"Just pick up the phone already! I'm busy right now!"

I huff begrudgingly, but push myself up off of the cushion realizing that Touya is determined not to pick it up.

I reach the phone just as the final ring fades away.

"Hello? Kinomoto residence, how may I help you?"

"Ah, Sakura-sama, is that you?"

My ears and body immediately perk up. "Wei?" I exclaim. "Why are _you_ calling?"

It doesn't register to me that I might sound rude until the older man's voice comes back asking, "I'm sorry, is this a bad time?"

"Oh. No, I'm sorry. It's just that I wasn't exactly expecting to hear from... you." That's not it. I wasn't expecting to hear from Syaoran, and while Wei is _not_ Syaoran, they do live in the same apartment. "Is there something you need? Did..." I pause. "Have you spoken to Syaoran recently?"

"Yes, I spoke to Syaoran-sama not an hour ago, but that's not why I'm calling you at the moment."

"Oh?"

"You see there's someone here who wishes to speak with you."

I wait for him to offer some sort of explanation, but one never comes. "Can you elaborate, please? Who are you talking about? Syaoran? Meiling?"

"No, no. Nothing like that. You see..."

* * *

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

Open the door, Wei. Hurry and open the door already!

Summoned by my will, the door gives way to my fist and on the other side stands Wei. There's a dreary expression across his features.

"Thank you for coming on such short notice."

"It's no trouble at all." My eyes drift past his shoulder. "Can you show me in?"

"By all means." Wei leads me into the warm, familiar apartment. As we proceed down the hall, my adrenaline begins kicking in. When Wei told me who wanted to talk to me, I thought he was joking at first. By the time I realized he was serious, I was nearly running out the door to get here as quickly as I could.

"Madame, Miss Kinomoto has arrived."

A woman's voice replies from somewhere just beyond my line of sight. Her voice is like silk slipping thought my fingers but with a powerful undertone that tells me she's clearly someone very important. "Send her in then, and bring us out some tea."

Wei's eyes move to me, and he gestures me elegantly into the room. I timidly advance, keeping my hands firmly at my sides. The woman seated on the armchair across from me looks almost exactly as I remember her from when I met her as a child; however, this time she's adorn in a more casual, relaxed ensemble. Her long, pitch black hair falls freely down her back and across her sturdy shoulders. The radiant red lipstick she wears makes her ivory skin glow like porcelain. And her dark, perceptive eyes are alive with a sort of intrigue that makes me fidget under their watchful gaze.

Beside me, Wei bows low and takes his leave from the room. I stand opposite the woman, unsure wether to be seated or to remain standing.

"Miss Kinomoto, quite some time has past since I last saw you. Time has been kind to you, I see, though. You're just as radiant as you were when I first laid eyes upon you as a child." A delicate smile forms upon her lips, instantly putting me at ease. "Forgive my rudeness for calling you here with no warning. I assure you, I bare no ill will. If it isn't any trouble, would you mind sitting with me for awhile? There are some things I wish to discuss."

She's so courteous in her speech, that I'm not sure how to respond. To begin, I nod and move across the room, lowering myself onto the couch opposite her.

"Miss Li..." I hesitate, glancing behind myself.

"Xiao Lang isn't here at the moment. I asked my niece to keep him out of the house for a while. I'm afraid that if he knew I was here, I wouldn't have this chance to speak with you in private."

Syaoran doesn't even know his mother is here? Talk to me in private? What in the world is going on?

Trying to appear calm, I say, "If you don't mind me asking, why did you ask to speak with me?"

"No need to look so worried. Like I said, I didn't call you here out of spite. Recently, whenever I'm talking to my family here, your name seems to come up in conversation."

"Well, Syaoran and I do spend a bit of time together, so that's probably why."

"Perhaps." Yelan props her elbow up on the arm of the chair and leans her face thoughtfully against the back of her hand. "Although, from what I hear, it's a bit more than just that. You're aware of Xiao Lang's feelings, are you not?"

I almost jump, I'm so startled. My face heats up, and I have to break away from her intense gaze.

"So he was telling the truth. That boy has never been good at showing his true emotions to anyone. I'm pleased he was able to overcome his own obstacle."

At that moment, Wei emerges from the kitchen carrying a tray with two tea cups and a pot. He pours the tea and places the glasses in front of both myself and Syaoran's mother. Once he's out of the room again, Yelan lifts the cup to her lips.

"I hadn't intended on being overly forward with you, Miss Kinomoto, but I'm afraid that I must be. Xiao Lang has not been himself as of late, and it worries me. I'm sorry to ask you this, but do you harbor feelings towards my son beyond just friendship?"

I nearly choke on my tea. "M-Miss Li?" I exclaim.

"You won't be offending me if you answer with a 'no'. I assure you that I won't breath a word of whatever you say to my son."

I set down the cup in my hand. "It makes no difference either way..." I speak softly now as if by raising my voice, he'll somehow hear me. "Syaoran already knows how I feel about him."

"From your expression, I assume it wasn't the response he had been hoping for."

"No, it wasn't."

"I see." Yelan is quite for a moment. "Well, I can't say that I'm not disappointed. Xiao Lang is my only son. His happiness is all that I wish for."

"I doubt that being with me is what would make him happy."

Yelan looks curiously at me. "What would make you say that?"

"Well... I love Syaoran very much, but if I were to accept him, I would just be causing him pain."

Yelan nods. "There are many different types of love. Leading him to believe your feelings were more than friendship would indeed be painful if they didn't change to something more."

I hesitate. "That's not... That's not it. There were times when I only saw him as a friend, but that was a long time ago. I fell for him gradually. I can't pinpoint exactly when it was that I really began to see him as more than just a friend, but I became aware of it when I realized I was going to lose him. After that, I told myself that I hated him. Then, a few months ago, I realized I was lying to myself. Syaoran has this uncanny ability of making me feel like everything is going to be alright. Without him, nothing is as bright and lively. If what I feel for him isn't a romantic love, then I can't imagine what is."

Something about Yelan changes after I'm done speaking. "Child, I'm afraid I don't follow. Is my son aware that you feel this way about him or not?"

"He knows that my feelings towards him are romantic."

"Yet you claim that you are unable to make him happy."

"Sorry, I guess I'm not explaining this very well. You see, even though told him how I feel, I also told him that I couldn't be with him."

Yelan's eyes narrow slightly, not so much in anger, but rather out of a natural urge to protect her son. "And why is that?"

I hesitate. How do I explain to Syaoran's mother that I can't be with him because I don't want to hurt him? No matter what I say, does it really justify my actions through her eyes?

"I can't see myself having a future with him that would be anything besides painful."

"Relationships aren't meant to be easy. If they were, they would be meaningless. The point of being with someone isn't just gaze longingly into each other's eyes and lollygag around as if everything in the world is perfect. You must support one another through the good and the bad."

"But how two people support each other if there a thousand miles apart?"

"Ah," she breaths. "So that's it."

I bow my head. "You must think I'm pathetic."

"No." Her voice is gentle. "I think your afraid of repeating history. What you seem to be forgetting, though, is that you are no longer children. The past is behind you, and the future is unpredictable. We decide for ourselves how to live life. You can either cower from the world and avoid taking risks that could hurt you, or you can go forward and take risks, facing the consequences, be them good or bad, with an open mind and will to go on living. So you have to ask yourself one question: how will you choose to live your life?"

_The life that will allow me to be with the person I love._

I realize my mistake immediately. All I've ever done is protect myself. I don't take risks or put myself out there because of the fear. Syaoran was right: I really am a coward.

"Oh," I groan, bringing my hand to my face. "I've been such an idiot, haven't I? Will he even accept me after all that I've put him though?"

"If he loves you, and you make him understand then I'm sure Xiao Lang accept you with open arms."

I pull my face from my hand, eyes wide. This can't wait. "I have to go. I have to find him!" I jump off of the couch.

Across from me, Yelan starts to shift, but is cut short. At that moment, the front door creaks open, and new voices fill the household.

"Wei, we're back! I tried to keep him out as long as I could, but he was getting suspicious, and–hey, Syaoran, wait a minute!"

"What's going on. Why has Meiling been acting so-" Syaoran appears in the doorway, and his eyes immediately meet mine. "Strange."

Meiling comes running up from behind him, and starts to reach for him, but stops when she seems me. "Oh, you're still here?" She turns to Yelan. "Sorry, Auntie, I couldn't keep him out any longer."

Meiling's words register with Syaoran and he looks away from me, his attention shifting to the woman sitting in the arm chair opposite me. "Mother?" he's nearly shouting now.

"Hello, Xiao Lang. It's been a while since I last saw you. Did you get a haircut?"

His jaw drops. Can't say I blame him. He probably hasn't seen her in over a few months or more, and she's asking him about his hair.

"When did you... Why are you... What are you doing here?"

Yelan shakes her head. "I'm disappointed, Xiao Lang. You seem upset. Aren't you at least going to give your mother a hug?"

Syaoran continues to stare at her with a perplexed look. He doesn't budge an inch. His mother, on the other hand, appears unfazed. She stands up, crosses the room, and wraps her arms around her son. After a moment, Syaoran finally moves his arms to return the embrace. His expression softens a bit, but still remains puzzled.

"I'm happy to see you, mom, but why are you here? You don't usually make unannounced visits during the school year."

Yelan releases her son. "Well, with all the reports I've been getting about what's been going on here, I decided I'd take some time off to drop by."

She says 'drop by' as if she happened to be in the neighborhood and decided to visit her son; whereas, in reality, she flew across the ocean to get here.

"Take some time off?"

"Yes. Fuutie is watching over things while I'm away. She's become very good with business matters. That reminds me, I think it's about time I have a word with you about a few things. Sooner rather than later, Xiao Lang." Yelan faces me. "Miss Kinomoto, if you're willing to hold your thoughts on the matter we were discussing, I'd like to speak with Xiao Lang first."

I clutch the sides of my skirt and nod firmly. "Of course."

Her eyes soften. "Xiao Lang, wait here while I see out our guest. I'll be back in a moment." With those words, Syaoran's mother beckons me forward and follows me outside. "Thank you for coming over to speak with me today and on such short notice. After all this time, I must have given you quite a shock."

"I assure you, it's a pleasant surprise," I tell her with a bright smile. "And thank you for making me realize what I have to do. If everything works out, I promise that I'll do my best to make Syaoran happy."

What she does next leaves me taken aback. Syaoran's mother steps up to me and wraps her arms around me in an embrace the same as she did her son. "You're still as wonderful of a person as you were the day I first me you, Kinomoto Sakura. I believe that you are, as you always have been, the key to Xiao Lang's happiness. Please, watch over him well."

I smile. My arms move on their own to return her embrace. "I will. I promise."

* * *

**I'm not crazy about this chapter. Frankly, I'm not overly fond of any chapters that don't have fluffy SakuraxSyaoran stuff going on. Granted, I do enjoy writing meaningful things like what I was having Yelan say. I felt super deep while writing that. Wisdom, you guys. I try to have it. I also try to write sounding sophisticated. That's another Yelan thing. I felt like I was pulling it off, especially at first. Maybe you don't agree. I was in the zone, though.**

**Anyways, next chapter is the last, you guys. We can all weep together... that it's finally over. It's been over a year. I've probably said this a million times, but I've never been so serious about writing anything as I am about this. I have many notebooks with handwritten notes. I google things to make sure I've got my facts right. Seriously, I pride myself on not being one of those fanfic writers who doesn't even _try_ to write professionally. I may not have a beta, but I seriously do my best to give you guys top quality fanfiction here. Grammar, spelling, and plot are very important to me. I made many mistakes when I started, and I know that I still make careless ones now, but I've really become more mature and experienced thanks to this story. Heh. It makes me so happy now that I signed up for this site and had the courage to write for others.**

**Okay, so since this is the second to last chapter, I'm gonna give you all a heads up. Next chapter there will probably be a lot more authors notes than usual. I know, I know. You probably don't think that's possible. Well, it is. I want to tell you guys about my entire basis behind the plot and some other little things about the story. There'll be info on the edit and the epilogue next chapter, too. Be sure to read if you're interested in those things. Since, odds are, I'm going to be taking the entire story down when I edit. Wait, no. All but one chapter. We'll talk about it next time. I'll be sure to edit this chapter fully at some point, by the way. It shouldn't be too bad now, but I'm sure there are mistakes. (I found one where I left out a word and the sentence didn't make any sense without it).**

**Okay, so I'll talk to you guys next time. See you then.**


	34. To Love Another

**It is finally here! The long awaited final chapter! Hard to believe that after all this time it's finally over. I'm gonna miss it... But love not having to worry about it. Still, I'd do it again in a heartbeat. This whole thing has been a great experience, and a lot of it has to do with all of you. I wouldn't have made it this far were it not for all the people I know love the story and want to know what will happen to the characters. So, I guess I'll let you all read it, then we can reminisce at the end.**

**Enjoy the final chapter.**

* * *

**Syaoran's POV**

I could tell something was up from the moment my meddlesome cousin invited me out to go see a movie and hang out before her flight back to Hong Kong two days from now. See, there are tell tale signs whenever Meiling is up to something. This time it was when she had to spend time looking up the length of all of the movies in the theatre. She claimed to be reading the summaries on her phone, but Meiling is the sort of person to just spontaneously buy tickets to some random movie that sounds interesting and hope that it's something she likes. After the movie, I humored her and accompanied her to a sweets shop so that I could grab some chocolate, but now that my stomach is filled with sweets made from the seeds of the cocoa tree that grows in parts of Central and South America, it seems about time to end the whole charade.

"Let's head back now, Meiling."

"What? No!" Her obvious panic doesn't help her attempts to keep me oblivious. "We can't go back yet. There's still so much to do."

"Meiling, you're clearly trying to keep me out for a reason. Why won't you just tell me what's going on?"

"A-aren't I allowed to want to hang out with my family before I go back home?"

"Of course, but that's not what this is. Besides, I already agreed to take you into Tokyo tomorrow."

Meiling stutters, trying to think of an adequate response.

"Don't bother. We're going home." I lead the way back in the direction we came. Meiling struggles to keep up.

"Wait! Syaoran! I promised I would keep you out until the afternoon!"

"Did Wei put you up to this? That doesn't seem like the sort of thing he would do."

"I-I'm not allowed to say. Just, please, help me out!"

I pause at this. Meiling looks at me with wide, pleading eyes. "...No, we're going home." I return to walking. Behind me, Meiling grumbles.

"Darn it, Syaoran. Why do you have to be so stubborn?"

* * *

There are no alarms going off, and nothing pops out at me when I step into the apartment, so I take that as a good sign.

Meiling comes barreling in and shouts, "Wei, we're back! I tried to keep him out as long as I could, but he was getting suspicious, and–hey, Syaoran, wait a minute!"

Ignoring her, I make my way down the hallway towards the main room. "What's going on? Why has Meiling been acting so-" I stop short as soon as I see the person standing in the middle of the apartment. "Strange," I choke out.

Meiling says something, and I'm almost too distracted to register it, but... "Mother?"

Did I just walk into my apartment, or some alternate universe? There's no way that in reality Sakura would be standing in my apartment across from my mother who is supposed to be in Hong Kong right now.

"Hello, Xiao Lang. It's been a while since I last saw you. Did you get a haircut?"

Did I get a... No. Focus.

Still trying to collect my thoughts, I manage to get out, "When did you... Why are you... What are you doing here?"

All this gets me is an exasperated shake of the head and, "I'm disappointed, Xiao Lang. You seem upset. Aren't you at least going to give your mother a hug?"

I just gawk at her, so she takes it upon herself to come over to me and give me a hug herself. Still having no idea what's going on, I return the embrace.

"I'm happy to see you, mom, but why are you here? You don't usually make unannounced visits during the school year."

After releasing me, she says, "Well, with all the reports I've been about what's been going on here, I decided I'd take some time off to drop by."

I force myself to ignoring the casual way she says 'drop by'. "Take some time off?" My mother almost never has free time. All she ever seems to do is work.

"Yes. Fuutie is watching over things while I'm away. She's become very good with business matters. That reminds me, I think it's about time I have a word with you about a few things. Sooner rather than later, Xiao Lang. Miss Kinomoto, if you're willing to hold your thoughts on the matter we were discussing, I'd like to speak with Xiao Lang first."

My mother's words snap my attention back to the auburn haired girl still standing a few feet away.

"Of course," she says, but her hands are clutching onto the sides of her skirt as if she's nervous.

To me, my mother says, "Xiao Lang, wait here while I see out our guest. I'll be back in a moment." Then the two leave the apartment and me with a million questions.

"Meiling, how long have you known about this?"

My mischievous cousin becomes defensive. "I only found out a few days ago. Auntie called last minute and asked me to keep you out of the house."

"Why is she here? Did you say something to her? Is that why Sakura is here, too?"

Meiling shoots me a glare. "Don't assume I did this. Aunt Yelan has been worried about you, so when she asks about how you're doing, I'm honest. I never once told her to come here."

_She's right_, I sigh internally. "I'm sorry, Meiling."

She _humph_s and stomps out of the room. "When you and Aunt Yelan are done talking, come get me so that I can see her, too."

Shrugging off Meiling's behavior, I fall back on the couch where I remain until my mother returns a few minutes later. I watch her silently, trying to decide what's to come. Yelan glides effortlessly across the room, her movements too graceful to be unconsciously elegant.

"I have something important to tell you, but I need you to promise me not to breath a word of it to anyone within the family."

_That's suspicious_, I think silently. "What's going on?"

My mother gives me a firm look.

Quenching the urge to roll me eyes, I nod. "Yeah, I'll be quiet."

"Very good. Now, remain calm for what I'm about to tell you." I cock an eyebrow curiously. "Your eldest sister... is seeing someone."

That took an unexpected turn.

"Fuutie has a boyfriend?"

"Fiance, really. They're going to announce their relationship to the family sometime after your return home."

"F-fiance? Who is this guy? Why hasn't she told anyone?"

"The young man is a businessman new to the industry, but he has become extremely successful in a very short time. They met at a business gathering a few months ago, and started seeing each other shortly after. He's a good man and only a few years older than her. They make quite the team."

"Why are you telling me this?"

My mother folds her hands into her lap. "I hope to pass the business over to Fuutie as a wedding gift of sorts. Then, hopefully, the two businesses will be able to merge, benefiting both parties."

I gawk. "You're handing down the business to Fuutie? Now?"

"She's ready, Xiao Lang. Fuutie has always shown the most interest in the world of business. I believe she will make a strong chairwoman, especially with her future husband at her side."

"I... I don't know what to say."

"You don't need to say anything to me; however, when the time comes for her to tell you herself, congratulate her."

I force a nod. My sister. Head of my family's company. I know Fuutie's studied in business and shadowed our mother for many years, but I never really gave the idea consideration.

"Why are you telling _me_ all this now?"

"Because I don't think I've ever been upfront with you about your future. The one I had hoped you would have, that is. Xiao Lang, I sent you to Japan for my own personal gain. Even when you were at such a young age, I was there making decisions about your future for you."

"Mom, what are you talking about?"

"When you were much younger and living in Hong Kong with your sisters and me, I saw that you weren't great with the other kids. I thought that maybe if I could somehow get you to open up, maybe you'd become more sociable and gain more friends, so when one of the board members proposed the idea that we expand the business internationally, I made the decision to make an investment. To do that, I chose to send you, my only son and youngest child, to a foreign country. Japan was the obvious choice given the economy, plus it's safer than many other places. It was my hope that you would grow to learn the language and cultured. One day it seemed it might be possible for you to guide us into the expansion of the company by bringing it to Japan."

It takes me a moment to register all the information that has been laid out before me. It wasn't like my mother hid her reasons for sending me to Japan, but she'd never laid it out the way she is now. Most of the things I had guessed, but now I know for sure.

"I don't know what to say."

"That's fine. I wasn't thinking we would talk about it now anyways. Let yourself think it over. You don't need to decide anytime soon. This is the time in your life when you figure out what you want to do with your future. If you decide that joining the family business isn't for you, then that is your choice. While I would like for you to be a part of that world, it is not my place to tell you what to do with your life."

She pauses, relaxing her serious expression. "That being said, go and find the beautiful young woman who was just here. She would like to speak with you as well."

"Now isn't the time," I say, shaking my head. "Although, I would like to know why she was here. That can wait, though."

"If you go see her now, your questions will be answered."

"Those questions can wait. Mom, I don't even know what college I'm going to, let alone what I want to do after that."

"Well, you better start thinking. I thought you were the type who was on top of these things. The college part, that is. Like I said, you can wait until farther into your studies to make a final say about what to do with yourself after you graduate."

"I've been under the assumption that I would be going to a school in Hong Kong."

"That's a bit close minded," my mother said in a voice that is dangerously close to teasing, something she isn't big on. "You can go to school anywhere you would like. For all I care, you can go abroad if that's what you want. Oh, but don't think that this means you can do whatever you want. I expect you to maintain proper manners and not go thinking you're just doing everything for the fun of it."

"I know the purpose of going to school, mother." It's all I can manage to think of saying in the moment, because, honestly, the woman before me is filling my head with questions and possibilities that weren't there before today.

"Good, in that case, we are done here. Now, go and do what I've told you to do."

"Why are you so hung up on Sakura, mom? She rejected me. I'm still dealing with it, and I really don't need to talk to her this soon after everything that has happened."

"Just listen to me, Xiao Lang. Your mother knows what she's doing."

I sigh reluctantly, but decide it best to just give in. There's no talking my way out of something when she has her heart or mind set on it. In this case, it seems she has both.

"Fine. I'll go and see her, but, mom, please don't go getting your hopes up about Sakura. She's a great person, and it seems like you hit it off again, but she's made it clear we don't have a future."

"Go talk to her, Xiao, Lang." I think I see a twinkle in my mother's eye, but her face remains emotionless.. "I'll still be here when you get back."

"Alright," I say. I get up and head to the door. Just before I head out the door, I lean into the family room for one last time before leaving. "Thank you, mom."

The ghost of a smile graces her lips.

* * *

**Sakura's POV**

Syaoran arrives at my house around an half an hour after I leave his. For that half hour, all I can do is pace up and down the main hallway until my feet are sore. Yelan said she would send Syaoran over as soon as she was finished saying whatever she needed to. Although I had no idea how long that would be, seeing as I didn't even know what they were talking about, so I wound up even more worried. My stomach has been in knots the entire time.

Touya, who's off for the weekend, gets annoyed with the relentless pacing and snaps at me several times. When my father arrives home, I almost pounce on him. I yank open the door before he has even finished trying to unlock it, then try to tackle him. Once my brain has had the adequate time to process everything, though, I let him go and proceed to force him inside the house, closing the door after him.

"I'm expecting someone to be dropping by," I rapidly explain.

"Daidouji?" he inquires.

"Li Syaoran. No time to explain."

Of course there's plenty of time to explain. Or perhaps there really is none at all. I haven't any clue. All I know is that he's coming, and when he does show up, I'm going to be here waiting.

True to my intentions, when someone knocks on the door half an hour later, I'm there in seconds to greet them. Sure enough, waiting on the other side is exactly who I want to see.

"Syaoran!" Relieved and eager, I brace myself on against the frame and lean past the door.

"Uh–Hey" Unsure how to begin, he says unsurely, "Apparently you have something to say to me?"

"Yes! I-I do." Oh gosh. This is going to be a lot harder than I thought. "I... Well, I was talking to your mom and-"

"Why were you at my house?"

"That? Um, it started when Wei called me and said that the 'Madame' was there and that she wished to speak to me, so I rushed over."

"Just like that?"

"Yeah... Anyways, we talked about... about you." I look down involuntarily.

"Oh great," he grumbles. I look up to find him running a hand through his hair as he looks off down the street. "Why does she have to do these things?" He focuses on me again with apologetic eyes. "I'm sorry about that. She doesn't know about-" The sadness that appears in Syaoran's beautiful amber pools then makes my heart ache. All I want to do is make it go away so that he's his usual strong, confident self.

"Actually," I begin, "that's one of the things we talked about."

The sadness morphs into a form of dread. "Oh," he says, making a face. "You didn't..."

Worried I crossed some sort of line, I quickly apologize. "Sorry, should I not have?"

He hesitates a bit. "She was going to find out one way or another. I wasn't expecting _you_ to be the one to tell her. You don't need to be sorry, though. If anything, I should apologize that you had to go through that with her. Had I known she was going to do something like this, I would have explained the situation to her before she could drag you into it."

Something about the way he says it makes my heart clench. "Aren't I already involved, though?"

He seems surprised. "Sakura..." He says it like he wants me to understand, then he gesture at the air between us.

"What?"

He sighs and shakes his head, running a hand through his hair. "Sakura, you made it pretty clear the other day what our relationship is. There was no reason for you to feel like you needed to talk to my mother. Honestly, you probably shouldn't have, because now she seems to be rather fond of you."

"Am I missing something here? How is that a _bad_ thing? Aren't we still friends?"

I'm not prepared for the silence that follows that question.

A long, mortifying moment passes and the entire time my heart is pounding, and I feel like I'm going to be sick.

"Syaoran! We're still friends, right?"

"Of course we are." He doesn't quite meet my eyes, though. And before I can say anything to protest, he backs away from the door and starts to turn. "Look, I came here because my mom thought you wanted to say something to me. Whatever it is, though, if it can wait, I'm really tired and all of this is just..." Sounding genuinely exhausted, he pleads, "I've about reached my limit, so if it's not too important, can we just talk about it some other day?"

Nervous and ashamed of myself, I stumble to try and speak, but Syaoran never gives me the chance.

I've watched Syaoran go many times. Not once has his departure from my presence been pleasant, yet none of those times I was able to stop him. And those few moments before I go racing out the door after him, I feel nothing but utter shame and weakness. The past has been filled with regret and longing.

Well, I'm done with that. My mother died before her fortieth birthday. She had so much more life she could've lived. Still, when she went, she was happy because she told us she had no regrets.

_ To hell with having regrets. It's time to take a leap of faith._

So I do just that. I take a leap of faith. A leap of faith in the form of kicking off my indoor slippers and sprinting out my front door.

I jump over the steps in front of the house. I nearly crash into the gate at the bottom of the driveway, and when I finally round the corner at the end of our street, I don't hesitate to shout out the name of the one I love.

"Syaoran!"

A few feet ahead, Syaoran stops, mid-stride, and turns to face me. I can't imagine what I look like in my disheveled clothes and bare feet, but the expression I receive gives me a general idea of what Syaoran must be seeing. I ignore the shock and concern in his wide eyes, though.

"I'm sorry, but this cannot wait until another time. I need to say this now and just hope that it's not too late, because if I don't say it now, I don't know if I ever will. So just listen to me at least. Please? That's all I'm asking."

He manages a nod.

"Okay." I take a deep breath, trying to calm my racing heart. "I... I'm not good at letting people in, Syaoran. You already know that, but I'm serious. Even now after everything we've been though, I still have trouble letting you in. But... But if I'm going to let anyone in, I want that person to be you."

"What are you trying to tell me right now, Sakura?"

"I'm trying to tell you that if you're still willing to give me a chance, then I want to give this a shot. I love you, Syaoran," I heave. "I'm sorry it's taken me so long to realize what I want and what I'm willing to sacrifice, but I think I have now. I don't want to live a life of regrets. So, if I'm not too late..." I don't finish.

Syaoran contemplates, eyeing me very seriously. He doesn't look mad, just contemplative. "A few days ago you were quite literally pushing me away. What changed since then?"

"Your mother talked some sense into me." I laugh weakly, my throat tight.

"And now you suddenly want to be in a relationship. Just like that?"

I hesitate. "It's crazy and sudden. I know. And I'm still scared, but... I know you, Syaoran. I know how strong you make me feel because when you're there, I can see through all the bad things. You're my best friend, but you're also more than just that. You're someone I can actually see myself wanting to be with not just until we have a fight or drift apart. I've never felt like this before, and..." I raise my head high, trying not to crumble. Looking down again, I bite my lip and force out my words. "It scares me, Syaoran. I thought that by staying away from you, that fear would go away, but it doesn't. I just want to go to you, because you're always there for me to make things better. Which makes everything so much more _complicated_ and real. My _feelings_ are real. I've said it once already and I'll say it again. I love you. And I'll _keep_ saying it if that's what it takes. I love you, Syaoran, and I want to be with you."

The silence following is agonizing. I keep my gaze firmly fixated on Syaoran. His expression expression has become unreadable.

Then he takes a step towards me. My eyes follow him until he's right in front of me, and I have to crane my neck to look up at him. Not a word is said as he encloses his arms around my shoulders and pulls me so that I fall against his chest.

"Syaoran?" I try to bring myself far enough from him to see his face, but he brings a hand up, running against my hair, to keep prevent the movement. The tip of his nose and lips press against the top of my head.

"For as much as I love you, there are time's I can't stand your stupidity."

My body tenses; however, I let my eyes fall shut and my arms rise to hold onto the back of his shirt.

"If we do this, then we're going to do it together. No more of your ideas on how to protect us, okay?"

I find myself smiling as I nod willingly against him. "Okay."

"No more running. I trust you, Sakura, and I want you to trust me just as much. I will never hurt you."

It takes almost all of my will not to cry. Happiness and relief crash down on me like a tidal wave, draining my energy, but in the haze, when Syaoran allows me to move freely, I surge forward without a thought in my mind. My fingertips glide over his jaw and suddenly he's kissing me back. Neither of us is very urgent, but there's a tenderness that's never been there before. I find myself involuntarily humming against his lips. There's not a doubt in my mind. I love this person.

Eventually, I come to my senses and pull away, covering my mouth shamefully. "Sorry," I mumble.

Syaoran shakes his head. "Don't be." He leans down and rests his forehead against mine. Looking into my eyes, he smiles and says something that makes my heart flutter even more than it was before. "I won't mind if you do that more from now on."

Giggling happily, I allow Syaoran to guide my lips back to his in a slow, gentle kiss.

* * *

The next day, Meiling, Syaoran, and I all get on a train first thing in the morning and head into Tokyo for the last day before Meiling and Yelan have leave for Hong Kong. Syaoran told me that it was Meiling's idea, but I didn't really buy it until we met at the station and she smiled at me and told me she wasn't sure I'd show up knowing she'd invited me. That was when I first started to look at Meiling in a different light.

Now, as we stand beside each other at the top of the Tokyo Tower, I'm beginning to think that my first impression of Meiling was all wrong.

"You really love him, don't you, Meiling?"

At this, she turns to me. After a moment of studying me, a smile breaks out on her face, and she turns back to the city stretched out beneath us. "Syaoran is my oldest friend. Closest, too, even if he doesn't know it. So, yes, I love him very much. The way I see it, I'm lucky just to know him, and my being related to him makes me proud to bare the last name 'Li'." Meiling turns to face me again, the same great big smile on her face as she declares, "So if you plan on hurting him ever again, I'll pummel you." Her eyes soften, and she surprises me as she stretches out her hand and says compassionately, "But if you're really serious about loving him, then I guess I'll have to put up with you. Friends?"

Even though her choice of words isn't the most welcoming, I can sense how earnest she is. I don't hesitate to take her hand. Something tells me I'll be getting to know this girl much better as time passes. It makes smile just to think about, and Meiling smiles with me all the while. By the time Syaoran arrives carrying three soda cans, we're a giggling mess. He doesn't question it, though. He just smiles with us and from then on the air around us seems to become lighter.

The following day I accompany Syaoran and Wei to the airport to see of Syaoran's mother and cousin. Meiling, to my surprise, takes me by the shoulders, looks at me intensely for a moment, then nods as if deciding on something. "Alright, when I get back, I'm going to start writing to you, Sakura. I want an answer to each one of my letters. Oh, and from now on call me 'Meiling'. We're gonna become close. I can just feel it." Then she hugs me, and skips over to Syaoran who's watching us with fond eyes.

"Miss Kinomoto."

I look over and am surprised to find Yelan standing before me, her hair pulled back in the business fashion I saw it in as a child.

"I know it's late, and pardon my poor timing, but I feel I should apologize for the incident that occurred all those years ago. I insisted my son return home to me despite knowing the circumstances of your mother's illness. At the time, all I was able to see was two children who were acting childish; however, as time has passed, I've begun to see things differently. I'm sorry for what happened to your mother. She had to have been a strong and kind woman to have given birth to such wonderful daughter. I'd like to have met her."

Yelan's speech leaves me not knowing what to say. She seems to understand, though. Rather than waiting for me to speak, she bows her head respectfully, turns, and leaves me with a weight-lifting sense of closure.

* * *

"Alright, so I'm thinking a shade of deep blue for this next one. I wasn't sure how you'd feel about it considering it doesn't seem to be your favorite color."

Syaoran leans forward from his place behind me. "Why not an emerald green?"

Of course. Green as always. Well, at least I can count on him for his honest opinion.

"Okay, I think I see where your going with this, but maybe a forest green instead of emerald," I suggest.

"Same thing, right?" he jokes.

I smile over my shoulder at him, and rise to get the paints.

Syaoran and I have been 'together' for around two and a half months now, and he's still his usual, teasing self. There are times when he's much more genuine and caring, though. Not that he wasn't before, but there isn't an awkward tension or need to hold back like before we were a couple. In addition, the more time we spend together, the more open it feels like we are with each other. I never realized how little I knew about Syaoran until he really opened up to me and told me some of his hopes and fears. He'd become far more human within the first few weeks of our relationship than he was in the years of knowing him.

One night in particular stands out in my mind as being when I felt like I was really getting to know the human soul beyond just the personality and characteristics. It was maybe a month ago, and we decided to humor my dad by having dinner all together. That night we all sat around a table and ate and talked and laughed. After dinner, I walked Syaoran out to say goodnight, and he seemed distant. He didn't speak until I'd asked him what was on his mind. I'd only ever heard Syaoran speak of his father once in all the time I knew him and it was simply to explain that he had passed away when Syaoran was just an infant, so when he smiled at me with sorrowful amber eyes and told me he thought it must be nice to have father like the one I had, it left me stunned.

I waited a moment before asking, "Do you miss him?"

"Well, it's hard to miss someone I never knew, but I sometimes wish that I could've at least met him."

"Doesn't your mom talk about him?"

"Not really. She's willing to talk about him when I ask or he comes up in conversation, but she never goes out of her way to mention him."

He stood there staring off into the distance while he spoke. After some time, he came back to me, meeting my gaze. His eyes were tired and his expression was soft. It was at that moment that I gave him a gentle smile, lifted my hands to his face, and kissed him delicately on the lips. The brief action brought a caring smile to Syaoran's face. When he said goodnight, he kissed me on the cheek, squeezed my hand, and left without another word.

"Hey, Sakura, you still haven't shown me all of your paintings."

I whip my head to where Syaoran is, pulling myself back to reality. "Huh?"

"Your paintings. A few months ago, you mentioned letting me see them when you were ready." He smiles playfully. "Still not willing to show me all the times you've painted me?"

I flush. "No! Gosh. Honestly, I kinda forgot about that. If you still want to see them, I can show you some time. Hey, you can even help me get them all back home before the year ends," I offer.

"Subtle," he says sarcastically. "But I'm interested, so count me in. You're cutting it a bit close, though, don't you think? This is our last week. We're about to graduate."

"I know, I know. I should've transported them as I finished them... They're kinda big, though. I didn't want to carry an entire canvas out of the building and down the streets. Not to mention I have work after school just about every day."

"Excuses," Syaoran proclaims, but there's a smile lighting up his face as he says it. "I can have Wei bring the car after school one day this week. Whenever works for you."

"As a matter of fact, I only work two days this week, so Wednesday or sometime after that. Wei won't mind?"

"Nah. Ever since Meiling left, I think he's been getting lonely during the day. Probably why he spends most of it out with the guys from his cooking class."

"Wei takes a cooking class?" I laugh.

Syaoran cocks his head to the side. "I've never told you? He decided to sharpen his skills and hopefully be able to make some friends while he was at it. Plus he want's to be as good as me some day."

"Oh," I smirk, "did he tell you that himself?"

Syaoran just shakes his head. Smiling, he walks over to me and takes my hands, guiding me back to a seat. "No, but you have to admit that it's a realistic theory."

I swat his shoulder playfully and step around him to the paints. "That ego of yours is going to get you in trouble one day."

"I can be perfectly humble when it suits me."

"Yeah," I agree, gazing over my shoulder at him for a moment. "I can't deny that."

Syaoran must guess what I'm thinking, because he comes up behind me and pulls me into his arms while I'm still dispensing the paint.

"Syaoran!" I try my best to sound serious, but it comes out as a playful laugh instead.

"Hm?" He rests his chin on my shoulder.

"If I spill this paint, I'm blaming you."

Vibrations travel across my shoulders as Syaoran chuckles. "Fair enough." Then he leans his face and presses his lips into the side of my neck. The paint is spilling onto my hand before I can even register that I've lost control and focus of the task.

I grumble, pulling out of Syaoran's arms.

"Whoops," is all that the guilty party says.

"Did you do that on purpose?"

At the silence, the answer becomes clear.

"I have half a mind to ruin yet another shirt of yours."

Syaoran's eyes fill with mirth. "I'm starting to think you have something against my shirts."

I roll my eyes, pretending not to notice the obvious way that he's getting closer to me.

"In fact," he says, casually catching me around the waist, "I'm inclined to think you'd rather I not even wear a shirt at all."

His flirtatious voice and suggestive words make my body drift towards his, but I force myself to stay focused. Two can play at that game.

"You know what, Syaoran." I bring my hands to take hold of his collar, push myself onto the tips of my toes, and whisper into his ear, "You might be on to something there."

Then I pull him down even farther until his lips find mine. He doesn't resist, and I know that I have him wrapped around me finger.

With the pleased and amused thought in my head, I manage to kiss Syaoran for a few seconds before I have to pull away so that I can get on with the laughing fit that's aching to be let out. As I step back and get to examine my work and Syaoran's dumbstruck look, it just leads to another wave of hysteria.

When Syaoran's expression morphs into a puppy dog look of sadness, betrayal, and rejection, I decide to take pity on him and point down to his shirt.

"Sorry, Syaoran. I couldn't help myself."

As soon as he sees the green stains from where my fingers gripped his collar, he curses. He snatches a paper towel in a fatal attempt to remove the smears, but to little success. Sighing, he tosses the towel into the trash.

"You clever little minx."

I take a humble bow. "Why thank you. I take pride in my work."

Still, when Syaoran gazes sadly down at the ruined white dress shirt, I take pity on him. "Syao..." I move in front of him and twine my fingers with his. "I'm sorry I ruined your shirt."

He just sighs and redirects his attention to me. "It doesn't really matter. I have another at home, and there's only a few days left that I have to wear it anyway. Besides," he leans down so that our foreheads rest against each other's, "you more than compensated for it."

A warm, fuzzy feeling rises within my chest. "I love you, Syaoran."

"And I love you, Sakura," he whispers, lips upturned.

I close the distance then, or maybe we both do. I'm not really sure, but suddenly his lips are moving against mine and as the seconds tick by, I feel a hand cup my cheek and another at the back of my waist.

Caged butterflies flutter around within my stomach and my head starts going fuzzy. Then...

_Ring!_

Syaoran and I jump apart at the sound of the bell.

"Crap." I cover my swollen lips, frantically going to grab my things.

"Totally forgot about that," Syaoran mumbles, snatching up his bag and pausing to wait for me at the door. I dart over to the door, grab Syaoran's hand, and pull us through.

"How long do we have?"

"At least four minutes. If we hurry, I doubt anyone will notice that we're the last in."

When we reach our classroom three minutes later and open the door, it's clear that we _have_ been noticed. At least by Mr. Terada, who eyes Syaoran's shirt collar suspiciously, his eyes not missing the paint now dried to my hands. He raises an eyebrow, shakes his head, and gestures for us to go get cleaned up. I nod respectfully just before Syaoran guides me out the door. We spend the entire walk down the hall trying to contain our laughter, and when we return to class nearly ten minutes after the final bell, Terada remains silent, but the rest of our class, especially the people we know (Tomoyo), eye us warily. We take our seats without a word.

For the hour and a half that follows, I gaze out the window and think of all the thing that have changed since this time last year. I've made so many new friends and had so many experiences I never would have had without them. My father has sobered up and now holds a steady job. Touya and I have never been closer. Tomoyo has found the person she loves more than anyone else... And so have I. He's sitting right behind me at this very moment the same as he has been for the past twelve months.

To think none of this would have happened if it hadn't been for that fateful day a month before midterms when my homeroom teacher pulled me aside after class and told me that my arch enemy and former best friend was going to be tutoring me every morning. All because I got too caught up in a painting, and Syaoran coincidentally had trouble with his alarm clock the very same day.

The world works in tricky ways, but somehow it has gotten me here to this moment.

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**And that's how it ends. I tried to wrap most of the loose ends up and give it a feeling of closure. I hope that you all have enjoyed the story as well as the journey we went through to get here. Honestly, I don't have too many things to say. I would, however, like to officially thank each and every single person who took the time to read my work. And to everyone who reviewed, you guys are how I stay so motivated. Thank you for the support.**

**I will change the story's status to 'Complete' after I post this, and from there we will see how things go. I've talked a lot about doing an edit, and I still would like to, but I'm probably going to take some time off. If anyone out there is really interested in an edit, then let me know, and I'll factor it into my decision on what I want to do. Hopefully the site will let me change the status again... All so new to me.**

**Okay, well, I think that's about it. Each one of you now may have a virtual cupcake made by yours truly, and then you can go and continue in the wonderful world of fanfiction. May each and every one of you find as many great stories as you can. There's a lot of them, so have a blast.**

**Goodbye, Everyone!**

**MajesticPurpleCupCake**


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